Fic recs, November 7th! · 12:51pm Nov 7th, 2014
It is done! The Story That Will Not Be Named has been deleted. I can now rest. (Feel free to ask me about it now.)
If ever you balked at joining the writeoff because the strict time limit gave you shivers, fear not! The newest contest, "Title Drop", is a format experiment, starting today and running through Monday the 17th! That's 11 days to write 8,000 words and drop your title in the text! (It's an inside joke, and I am very proud of myself right now.) Give it a shot!
The one-day delay allowed me to add a few more reviews to this one, so it's not all bad. But first, as my old Swahili teacher would have said, come and get your M&M!
H: 2 R: 3 C: 3 V: 2 N: 1
Duet in the Folk Style by Pascoite
Reading (part 1) by Goombasa
Genre: Romance
MacTavia. Pascoite had been plugging this story to me for a good three months, so I was very excited to read it. I found it absolutely worth the wait. I’m not sure where to start. This is a story about Big Macintosh, I suppose, and family, and music, and love. It succeeds at that last item especially because it goes far beyond what you get in most shipfics. It builds to that first kiss, and then keeps going. Also, while Octavia gets the major change first, we see each of them rubbing off on the other over time. Added to that, Octavia has considerably more depth than she tends to in most of the stories I read with her. Yes, she’s still a city pony, yes she’s still married to classical music, but she dives head-first into farm life given half a chance. Of course, Pascoite doesn’t hesitate to show off his music knowledge once again, but he’s made it very accessible and branched out to include folk music as well as classical. On that note, I found myself comparing this to Fiddlesticks!: this is basically all the good parts of that story, but better, and with a ship I could actually give two damns about. Oh yeah, and let me not forget what might be the most interesting part of this piece: Mac is synesthetic and sees music as colors. And remarkably, this isn’t used as a really major part of the story. It’s the reason why Octavia takes an interest in him, and it serves to add mysticism to the story as well as as a unifying emotional thread, but it’s not a big deal once it’s revealed, not a fatal flaw or huge symbol or anything. Okay, time to talk about the epilogue, which is brilliant and made me cry and should not be spoiled at any cost: What Pascoite does well is show us that a failed relationship is not the end of the world. Not just because “she might come back” as happens at the end — and note, there’s nothing saying they’re going to get back together — but because, as we see before he reads that postcard, time heals all wounds. Yeah, neither of them was able to find anyone else, but they were both happy regardless. You don’t find that in shipfics or the romance genre at large pretty much ever. In all, this is more or less a perfect story, and one I feel safe recommending to a broad audience.
Highly Recommended
When “Happy” Never Comes by Pastel Pony
Reading by Solar Pony
Long story short, if you like Scribbler, you’ll like this guy. His voice is pleasant, his pacing excellent, he uses background music to good effect. I question his story choice, but there’s always room for improvement. And since this is his first reading, he goes on the list already! :D
Genre: Sad
Diamond Tiara gets a letter. This is one of those stories lacking in setup for the emotional payoff, where you can see the ending coming a mile away and only cringe as it goes just exactly the way you hoped it wouldn’t. Long story short, Diamond is upset because Silver Spoon killed herself. I mean, it’s possible that there’s another interpretation to the letter, but that’s what I get out of this, and the haphazard setup for suicide is just aggravating. You can’t half-ass that kind of thing. The rest of it I’ve seen before in every other sad Diamond and Silver or Diamond/Silver redemption fic ever.
Not Recommended
A Moment With the CMC by DrWolf
900th Review of 2014! Will I hit 1k in a year?
Script version by Dr. Wolf, Caitbug and Mary Medley
Genre: Slice of Life
I’m glad I decided to sort through the friendoff fics, because otherwise I wouldn’t have found out Dr. Wolf is on Fimfic! This is unusual not because it’s a fic reader’s first fanfic, but because it was originally conceived as the short radioplay I linked above, and then was novelized, if you will, and posted on Fimfic for the friendoff (ignore that the story version was posted first by over a week). Anyway, I’m not too up with Dr. Wolf as a character, and this fic makes no attempt to explain why there is an anthropomorphic wolf working as a psychotherapist in Equestria, but if you can accept that, it's hardly a problem, as he's a good character. The writing is decent, though my main complaint is inconsistent (and otherwise unnecessary) capitalization of species names, like “Earth Pony”. Otherwise, well, it’s just a slice of life piece with some light comedy as the CMCs try out a new role. Actually, that what’s so strong about this: they play-act the way kids do, with the usual destructive Crusader touch. Dr. Wolf, meanwhile, gets to sit in the middle and wonder just what the hell is going on. I will say that, listening to the radio version, it becomes apparent that the narration doesn’t really add anything to the story: it’s all told in the dialogue. Still, the writing isn’t bad and as a whole, this works.
Recommended for CMC Fans
Unicorn Horns Are Made of Candy by ocalhoun
Reading by Captain Sand
Genre: Comedy
Pinkie Pie accidentally discovers that Twilight’s horn tastes like grape candy, and sets off licking every unicorn horn she can find to figure out what they all taste like. This story scoots past being a metaphor for rape by explicitly leaving out the sexual aspect. When it’s finally explained to Pinkie that what she’s doing it wrong, it's framed as a question of dignity and personal space, relegating any notion of sexual pleasure to fanon alone. This is very good, because I became horribly discomfited by the scene in which Pinkie goes after Sweetie Belle. Otherwise? Pretty darn funny. I could do without the shippy ending, and after a while it feels like a string of scenes that are barely related to one another, but overall it holds together and the writing is pretty good.
Recommended If You Like Crude Humor
Ebola-chan Visits Equestria by Ebola-chan Ganbatte
Genre: Trollfic
So, uh, Ebola-chan is pretty straightforward once you understand that she's the ponified version of a character create by who else but 4chan. I kind of feel like this is the cute/horrible OC our fandom deserves (suck it, Aryanne!). Anyway, after seeing this on Skype one night (my response was “Why do I like stupid things?”), I had to read it, and, well, this sadly isn’t as amazing as I’d hoped. The joke pretty much starts and ends with “ebola pony”, though her skull companion is rather humorous and I loved Fluttershy’s part. Also, the author sees fit to kill off a bunch of bad OCs, thus proving Ebola-chan’s superiority over other characters. I could kind of get into this if there was more to it, but it doesn’t go anywhere beyond the title premise, and while the writing is passable, it’s also kind of rushed. Overall, not entirely a noteworthy piece.
Vaguely Recommended
Rainbow Dash and the Power of Imagination by Regidar
Reading by FanFics Anonymous
This is a roundtable group, and while not what I look for in a fanfic reading, this has its merits nevertheless. In short, if you’re looking to sit down and listen to a story being read, this has too many asides and quality issues to be worth bothering with. They’re obviously doing this on Skype and technical problems plague the recording. However, if you like listening to people read silly stuff in wacky voices, this might appeal. Rainbow Dash, for instance, sounds like Tree Trunks from Adventure Time, while Pinkie is voiced by Grenda from Gravity Falls. The readers have a lot of fun with what they’re doing and take nothing seriously. Either way, do note that there’s a lot of yelling to contend with (listen to the first three seconds to see what I mean).
Genre: Land Before Time Crossover?
I’ve never seen The Land Before Time, so I just kind of took this as “reality-hopping characters come to Equestria” (they reference having been in the Half-Life and Spongebob universes previously). It's an idea that never appeals to anyone but the author and their friends, because no one else knows the full extent of the characters’ travels, at least when they're original creations. Anyway, this is basically “random characters show up and goad Rainbow Dash into writing something dumb”. It’s vaguely amusing, but not Regidar’s best work, which even he cops to. I have to assume you’d get more out of this if you’ve seen the aforementioned movie, but I thought those were about talking dinosaurs, not cosmic beings, hence my confusion.
Vaguely Recommended
Cutie Mark Crisscross by Everyday
Suggested by Everyday ‘cuz I said I’d review something for him ‘cuz he’s a cool dude
Genre: Episode-Like
The Cutie Mark Crusaders have a great idea: become better ponies so they can finally earn their cutie marks. This is followed by a terrible idea: ask Discord to turn them into better ponies. What follows is some fun race-swapping that leaves them all with a different outlook on life. There are a number of reasons why this works well. First, the writing is good, well-paced and smooth, not to mention perfectly show-tone. Second, the way these stories usually go is either for everyone to find out that their new body is good, or that it’s bad, lesson learned, but we get a little of both from all three. Third, Discord is thoroughly incorrigible, and he’s wonderful. This might actually be better than the Friends Forever comic. Notably, he saves the somewhat cliche “letter to Celestia” ending. Definitely give this a read.
Recommended
And guess what? Everyday suggested the next two fics as well! I’m mad! Mad, I tell you!
Discord Punches Twilight in the Face by Craine
Genre: Comedy
Going off the title, I was expecting it to be the event which sets everything in motion; instead, it’s more a John Dies at the End, and we get to watch things slowly converge to their inevitable conclusion. This is an odd duck. Discord gets some fantastic characterization, save for his using a word like “pissed”. (This is made up for somewhat by Fluttershy later exclaiming, “Oh, pickles!” I died, for realzies.) Celestia and Luna are ever so slightly out of character, but not only is it funny, they also act like sisters, which is something else I love. There’s Spikeabuse, but Spike just sort of takes it in stride, and even turns things around on Twilight, giving as good as he gets; you get the feeling they give each other a hard time like that constantly. The writing has some issues, mostly overlooked typos, but there are some really fantastic turns of phrase. I guess, all told, that makes this piece “a mess”, but it's a good mess. Mostly, I’m just floored by how this transitions from random comedy to character drama and back as if it weren’t no thang, not to mention the importance behind the thing what makes Discord want to do the title. It definitely surpasses the “Pony Does X” subgenre, and it gets really intense by the end. (Although the Youtube video is inexcusable.)
Recommended
So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish by Blueshift
Genre: Blueshift Story
The tragic story of a shiftless mare who only ever had one friend in the whole world, Home Is Where the Harp Is meets Life Is a Lemon. (Lyra is pretty much perfect.) It’s about the effect totems have on us, how they can cause us to better ourselves. It’s also about friendship, and despite being the surreal kind of mostly-comedic slice of life that Blueshift normally writes, it has a damned powerful ending. Why didn’t I read this sooner?
Highly Recommended
Because Present Perfect Wouldn’t Do It by Wanderer D
Unofficial Sequel to A Puzzle Unsolved
Genre: Style Parody
So yeah, that whole “go back through journals again and collect fic readers” thing? Ended up reminding me of this. And now that I have a system for reviewing story collections, that means I gotta do this one, too. D: Anyway, my Agents of SHIELD shipping crossover, A Puzzle Unsolved, got a lot of people upset because it ends on a sour note: Coulson is declared dead and Octavia retreats through the mirror, never to see him again. So D decided to write a sequel (which I fully do not approve of!) in the form of this, which… Well, he captures to an extent the writing style I used in that story, and then it turns into something silly. It’s kind of worth reading for the final scene. You might actually get a kick out of this if you haven’t read my fic, either. (Of course, why haven’t you? :( )
Recommended for Laughs
Daring Do’s Ghost(writer) by Razalon the Lizardman
Genre: Adventure
Daring Do quests for a new lost artifact, accompanied by her faithful companion. This posits a really intriguing idea, which you can maybe guess from the title. And after running Daring through a bit of a gauntlet involving a giant snake (another neat idea), this takes that idea to a logical endpoint. This makes for a slightly unbalanced plot, as the denouement is a good third or more of the story, but it’s made up for by that central idea being really unique and interesting. Not to mention that this feels like part of a much longer piece, and you can get a good sense for both where they’ve come from and where they’re about to go. The writing’s good, too (I helped :V).
Recommended
I'm still definitively annoyed at Pascoite for beating me to the buck with his story... but I'm still gonna give it a read. How else can I be critical of everything he did wrong (i.e. not like I'd have done it) otherwise?
Huh. And to think I passed up Blueshift's story. On my RiL now.
Leave Coulson alone!
The dude has enough trouble being the head of S.H.I.E.L.D. nowadays.
OOPS! Spoiler.
Huh I didn't get a notification for this. Better let the mods know...
I like that genre.
2579336 You are a mod.
2579361
If you listen closely, you can hear the joke say 'zing'.
~Skeeter The Lurker
2579326
I think I need to do a Blueshift edition too. c.c
2579336
I clicked the red check-mark! :B
2579343
He truly is his own genre. Otherwise, it's "Comedic Dark Surreal Slice of Life" and that's just a mouthful. :B
Forgive me for being rather thick, but where is the submission place for the write off? I see a link on the word write off to writeoff.me, which gives me a not available page and feels like on of those auto advertiser links.
2579387
The url is http://writeoff.me
c.c I literally don't know why that isn't working.Sorry, I didn't put enough t's in it the first time. :B2579406
OK thanks got it now.
2579380 You forgot to mention Bueshift's story was written for PK and his mourning of his fishy.
2579450
God, that makes it even worse. D:
2579530 No it doesn't!
The thing with TLBT is that there are like, fifteen movies. My crossover concerned the supporting protagnonists from the seventh one, so it's somewhat obscure. A lot of people don't bother with the non-Don Bluthe ones (read: any after the first), but they were my childhood man. Also, people seemed to enjoy it, I dunno.
Another reason it may seem sort of weak is that it was a continuation of an idea I started way back two years ago, when I was still a bumbling 14 year old, long before I became the bumbling 16 year old I am today. So aside from the idea being dumb as fuck, I was trying to salvage the writing.
In the end, it was all worth it to make fun of the art communities lowest contributers, fanfic writers. Man, fuck those guys.
As for my best work, I see you throw that phrase around when talking about my work somewhat often. I'm sorry! Not everything is going to be a Bonsai Trees!
Will I ever be good enough for you again? WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME, PRESENT? 
2579598
More Bonsai Trees, you hack. >:V
900 is a good number of reviews for a year. You should just relax and save up your time for next year. Yes. Pay no attention to me trying to catch up to you. Just relax.
You haven't seen The Land Before Time!? Shut up! Stop talking about ponyfic. Go, now. Watch that film. It is wonderful and awesome and amazing and people not seeing it is a travesty!
2579598 Shut up, Regidar! There is only one movie! ONE! No sequels, no games. No tv show. Just. One. Amazing. Film.
I won't take offense to my story being the last on the list, because I'm used to it by now.
Anyway, you need to see The Land Before Time, because it's amazing and stuff.
Oh man, Duet in the Folk Style. I'm the lone dissenting reader on it, (seriously, don't read the following unless you've read the story) I really disliked the end of the romance (the idea that relationships that involve lots of travel don't or usually don't work is a huge pet peeve of mine, and to see two characters give up after barely even trying rubs me raw) and more than that I hated how the epilogue played out. It felt like a tragedy as much as anything else to see the two of them be lonely and fail at loving anyone else for decades.
But, I have come to the conclusion that this is a personal issue and would not actually warn anyone away from reading it. Based on the reception the ending received from nearly every other reader, my opinion is so statistically irrelevant that most people wouldn't share it.
So, what's with the Story That Will Not Be Named, that you can now talk about since it got deleted?
this is what happens when you tell us we can ask questions
I have achieved new heights in society. I am now "a cool dude."
My life is complete.
I'm honored to have my story Recommended. I couldn't ask for much more for my debut. (I'll try to not to take eleven weeks with my next story...)
I'm glad you enjoyed the other stories I suggested, as well. They are among my very favorites. I hope you'll forgive me for apparently driving you to madness. (I knew you'd like Lyra. I called it.)
Thank you for all of the praise. It's very encouraging as a beginner writer.
2579976
Welcome to Fimfic!
2579670
lolno :V
2579822
Order just means order. :B
2579867
Yeah, that's like, the opposite of a pet peeve for me, so you're on your own. :B
2579931
What's with it is that it rots on my hard drive, never again to see the light of day.
2579976
Thanks for recommending stuff I'd like! :D
2580339 Hahaha, oh I already felt alone on it.
2579976
Please, go ahead and take elven weeks. Heck, take an even twelve weeks. If only I could get a story in three months from the authors around here I enjoy reading.
2579602 I do have a large universe that I built for it in my spare time, but I'm afraid it will fall victim to expanded universe syndrome
2581377
I wish you luck regardless. :B