Little loony Luna and crazy caffeinated Celestia's life in Canterlot

by Vidhwansak

Shining Armor is weirder, Lulu!

Shining Armor is weirder, Lulu!

What a beautiful day in the crystal empire! Celestia hummed to herself as she walked over to the dining room in the crystal castle, and sat herself down; while Luna was holding the fort down in Canterlot (she hoped that there was a castle to return to), she was off paying her niece and her nephew-in-law a little visit to see how things were going. One of her immediate concerns were the sudden 'crystallization' process her body and mane went through, but it was quickly written off as a temporary thing that would wear off when she left the empire. This land was a very strange, yet beautiful part of Equestria, and she had not had much time in the past to experience its pleasant atmosphere.

A servant stopped by, making rather audible noise with his hooves to get her attention. Tradition, too, seemed different here, as while the servants here were loud and visible, her servants were usually hiding away and were very quiet. "Princess Celestia, is there anything that you desire from the kitchens?" Celestia nodded with a polite smile, and gave a rather simple list of what she wanted; sometimes, a simple breakfast was all you needed to start the day well.

"A plate of waffles, twenty stacks high, and some syrup, please, with a cup of water." The servant nodded, bowed, and promptly went through the large kitchen doors to relay the order that he received, not a hint of amazement about how many waffles he was asked to bring her. She only had to wait a short while before her plate of waffles, a large bottle of syrup and a cup of water came by, something that pleased her greatly. "Thank you!"

Once the servant left, she levitated the bottle of syrup up to the top of the imposing stack of waffles, and poured the syrup, her eyes taking in the way how the syrup would pool in the squares of the waffles before overflowing and moving onto the next square; how the syrup would slither down the sides of the imposing stack of waffles, drenched in the sweet, thick liquid that completed every waffle and pancake. It was like staring at heaven itself, if heaven were a stack of sweet, sticky waffles.

Wait, what? She swore that somepony stole the first ten waffles right under her nose, because she didn't remember eating them. She only just noticed the syrup around her muzzle and the still clean fork next to her side when Shining Armor came in through the door, a tired smile on his face.

Oh, hey, it's Princess Celestia! "Ah, Princess Celestia! It's been awhile." He sat down at the table, just across from her, and gave a lazy salute.

The princess wiped her messy face with a napkin, which only helped slightly, and grinned at him. "Indeed it has, Shining Armor! Care to join me for some breakfast?"

He nodded, and looked at the stack of waffles that had been demolished, then at the alicorn that was eating them. "Looks like some alicorn has been busy eating; servant!" A servant quickly came from the kitchens, this time, a mare, waiting for his orders. "I'd like a stack of five waffles, please, and two glasses of orange juice." The mare nodded, and went back into the kitchen.

No syrup? Celestia, meanwhile, finished gobbling down her seventeenth waffle (this time, using the previously clean fork) before making a comment about the lack of syrup in his order. "Did you forget to ask for some syrup as well, Shining Armor?"

"Why yes I...What, princess?"

"So you did forget! Don't worry, I'm sure there's enough syrup left in this little container for your measly little stack of five waffles." She levitated the bottle of syrup over to him, though her action was stopped as Shining Armor lit up his own horn; at first, she thought it was to take the syrup bottle from her, though it was to actually repel the bottle away from him. Perplexed, Celestia tried once again, only to be pushed back a little more firmly by Shining Armor.

"Shining Armor, what is the meaning of this? Do you expect me to believe you can eat waffles without syrup?" To her horror and dismay, her former captain of the guard (you can't expect him to protect two princesses at the same time who just so happen to be living miles away from each other) nodded slowly, which caused her to slam a hoof down on the table with such force that she left a sizeable dent into the crystalwork. The servant that was delievering Shining Armor's plate of waffles dropped the plate in front of him hastily before leaving for the kitchens, obviously not wanting to be near the two in case sparks flew.

...This isn't going to end well for me, is it? I'm sorry, Caddy! After clearing his throat audibly, Shining Armor carefully asked Celestia if she was alright. "...Princess, is there something troubling you?"

He has to be lying. "Prove it."

"...What? Prove what to you, exactly?"

"Prove you can eat waffles without syrup. That should not be possible for anypony!"

Shining Armor looked as he were going to say something, then shrugged as he levitated his fork; then, to Celestia's horror, he actually began eating the waffles. Without syrup, butter, without...Anything on it! Shining Armor continued to munch on his waffles, clearly amused by Celestia's reaction to him eating waffles without syrup. For a princess, she's certainly very silly!

"I don't like syrup, Celestia; it's too thick and has too much sugar in it. I'd rather eat my waffles plain."

---

"...That, Lulu, is when I whacked Shining Armor over the head with a stop sign, to show him that you should put syrup on your waffles! Shining Armor is weirder, Lulu! At least Cadence actually has an excuse to not dip cookies into milk; Shining Armor just doesn't want to put syrup on his waffles!"

...What? Luna stared at her sister impassively for a moment before deciding to focus on the one part of the story that didn't make any sense to her. "Where did you get the stop sign, Tia?"

...Where did I get the stop sign? Celestia sighed, and her hoof met her face. "Does that really matter, Lulu?! Shining Armor cannot eat waffles without syrup!"

Oh, for the love of... Luna snapped at her sister, getting a bit annoyed at how her sister was blowing things out of proportion. "I can understand his plight, sister! Syrup really is a bit too thick and sugary once you think about it!"

Snapping back, Celestia still refused to believe that ponies could eat waffles without syrup. "I eat it just fine, Lulu! I don't find it that thick! Why should anypony else?"

"You're different because you practically inhale your waffles without even remembering you even ate them in the first place!"

The solar princess opened her mouth to deny that, when she remembered the first ten waffles suddenly disappearing in front of her. Darn it. "I...will not argue with you on that."

"Let's agree on one thing both, sister."

Celestia leaned in slightly, interested in what Luna had to say. "Agree on what, Lulu?"

"That Shining Armor and Cadence are both weird."

I'm not entirely sure that Cadence is weird, but better to not argue that with her. "Agreed!"

Luna nodded, satisfied of their agreement, and smiled. "Shall we go to a jacuzzi and relax in a tub of molten chocolate with marshmallows and floating rubber ducks?"

"That would be wonderful, Lulu!"

Author's Note:

First dual chapter release

There is a part one to this

You did read that first right

The hypocrisy at Luna's statement when compared to themselves

Comments

[Vidhwansak]

And here we are with the first double release chapters

[EquesTRON]

(THOU ART -- apologies. Thou art a very silly pony indeed!)
(You're improving, Luna.)

(...I still say Shining Armor is weird for not putting syrup on his waffles.)
(This from an alicorn who likes relaxing in a chocolate-filled jacuzzi with rubber ducks.)
(And marshmallows. Don't forget the marshmallows.)
(Believe me, I wish I could.)

[Niklashg]

I agree with shining Syrup is to sugary.

[kyubbiman]

[YukoAsho]

she was off paying her niece and her husband...

The wording here makes it look like Shining was Celestia's husband as well. Perhaps a better phrasing would be "she was off paying her niece and nephew-in-law..." or something along those lines.

And while I can see the point on not using syrup, no butter? Sad Yuko is sad...

[Themaskedferret]

*grins* Very nice. Clearly the ducks should be made of marshmallow fluff.

[Doctor_Brony1234]

Reminds me of my first frat party... When I whacked some dude in the face with a stop sign while wearing box around my lower body... WTF was I doing there on the street?!

[SPACENUGETZ44765]

Lol the stop sign (from the comments section, 2 or 3 chapters ago) I REMEMBER!!

[Kitty Creeper]

Well... I eat my cheerios with orange juice instead of milk.

[Razzy]

Sunbutt has stop sign summoning powers?

I have never eastern American style thick pancakes, where I love we prefer crepes, aka thin folded pancakes with stuff inside them.

Cya
Raziel-chan

[emeraldhuskydragon0]

Crepes are best breakfast not pancakes or waffles of French toast

[Majestic_Donut]

Luna nodded, satisfied of their agreement, and smiled. "Shall we go to a jacuzzi and relax in a tub of molten chocolate with marshmallows and floating rubber ducks?"

I’m dead 💀 Wonderful chapter!!! (They all are, but I don’t think it’d be very practical for me to comment on EVERY SINGLE CHAPTER this was just too funny not to say something)