Little loony Luna and crazy caffeinated Celestia's life in Canterlot

by Vidhwansak

This is why we have problems, Tia!

This is why we have problems, Tia!

Cadence's hooves gently crushed the snow on top of the concrete path she was walking on that was inside Canterlot's public park. Accompanying her was Chrysalis, who was now clad in a newly bought black and green coloured scarf that was very fitting for her. The two had engaged in a small shopping spree with each other, especially when they went to the food court and utterly decimated the slurpee machine and a few pounds of fries. Fun times were had all around, and they were ending it with a walk through the chilly, snowy park.

"Well, today was fun, Chrys!" The alicorn to her left nodded with a content smile, and adjusted her scarf slightly.

"Indeed, Caddy! I haven't had this much fun in awhile, other than the time Blueblood and I prank called Tia. It makes you wonder why we hardly get any time for ourselves and each other."

With a sigh, Cadence regretfully had to acknowledge the fact that their time together was almost over. "Yeah; unfortunately, we probably won't be able to spend another day like this with each other for a long, long time. It's pretty dumb, really; we have immense power that our ponies have come to respect and even fear, and yet we aren't able to really do much outside our work since there's so much of it. You'd think ponies would be a little more sensible and not dump all that work on us; we need breaks, too!"

Sighing, Cadence drank in the last dregs of her slurpee before tossing it at a tree, which it bounced off of, orbited Chrysalis' head three times, attacked a flock of ravens and narrowly missed crushing a snail before it flew into a nearby garbage bin. "Ten points. Our little ponies, or, changelings, in your case, always seem to have some kind of problem that they can't fix themselves, or hoof over some kind of political thing that needs our approval. While I love them, they can also be rather...Dependent on us to set things right for them."

"You're telling me; some of the things I've had to do for my changelings leave me wondering what would happen if I wasn't here to assist them in such matters." Chrysalis tossed her slurpee forward, bouncing off a very startled bird, rolling across the ground and then flying up into the air at near sonic rainboom speeds before landing squarely on Celestia's horn. "Twenty points, beat that. Hello, Tia, Moonie!"

Moonie? What? Cadence looked over to see a suddenly agitated Celestia clad in a pink and white scarf pulling the unfortunately empty slurpee drink from her head, and...

Oh my gosh, it really is Nightmare Moon, it's NIGHT, MARE, MOOOOOON! Nightmare Moon! Wearing a white scarf that contrasted her dark coat perfectly! Actually here! Cadence was internally screaming, and her screaming only intensified as she realized that her hooves were locked into place, rendering her unable to run. MOVE! I HAVE TO MOVE, NOW! COME ON, GET WITH THE PROGRAM, HOOVES! HASTA LA VISTA! ¡AY CARAMBA! MAMMA MIA! She looked over at Chrysalis, and to her horror, she didn't seem surprised at all to be meeting Nightmare Moon!

Celestia was the first to exchange words as she removed the slurpee drink from her horn, and the pitiful gaze she shot at Chrysalis could destroy worlds. "Chrys, you do not tease me by throwing an empty slurpee on my horn! You know how much we love them!"

Fortunately, Chrysalis wasn't fazed by Celestia. "That's why I did it, Tia! It was priceless, the look on your face when you suddenly got all excited for a slurpee that wasn't there!"

"You little..."

The two exchanged friendly (or not so friendly, depending if you saw playfully smacking each other with frying pans friendly or not) banter that was tuned out as Cadence saw Nightmare Moon level her gaze upon her. "Who might this be, Tia?"

Please don't please don't please don't-

"Oh, that's Cadence." Celestia dodged an incoming strike from Chrysalis, and blew a raspberry at her. "Nice aim, Chrys!"

"Oh, you'll thank my aim when I'm done with you, Tia!" The 'fighting' intensified to include more kitchen appliances, including, but not limited to pots, can openers, plates, whisks, and blenders.

Cadence, meanwhile, was watching Nightmare Moon slowly stride towards her, with a neutral expression on her face. Don't panic, don't panic, don't panic, Nightmare Moon is walking over to you...She might be merciful...Don't think about it too much... Her body threatened to betray her, but she tried so hard not to let her wits escape her.

Nightmare Moon stopped in front of Cadence, hesitating. The poor alicorn in front of her was just oozing fear out, and she didn't blame her. A simple greeting might scare her off, but there wasn't much she could do, so she just tried to sound as soft as she possibly could. "Well, hello, Cadence. My name is Nightmare Moon. I'm pleased to me-"

Cadence couldn't hold herself back any longer due to Nightmare Moon's close proximity to her, and promptly screamed something incoherent as she threw her hooves around a startled Nightmare Moon in an almost-crushing bear hug. This had the effect of causing Nightmare Moon to fall to the ground, taking Cadence with her, who didn't seem to mind.

Nightmare Moon did, though. What in the blazes is this Cadence doing?! "What th-"

A squeal for Cadence cut Nightmare Moon's words off as Cadence somehow managed to hug Nightmare Moon even harder, and she swore that she heard a bone crack from the tremendous strength of Cadence's hug. "Oh, my, gooooosh, it really is you, you are the Night, mare, Moon! You're so famous for creating the gothic scene back then, and I thank you soooooo much for it! You revolutionized the teen scene in Equestria like nopony else has done before! "

Unfortunately, Nightmare Moon had absolutely no idea what Cadence was talking about, so she responded with the only thing she could say in a situation like this, which was also probably the worst thing she could say. "...What?"

A sharp gasp escaped Cadence, and she immediately went into a short and frantic explanation, letting go of Nightmare Moon in the process, who was never more thankful to be able to breathe and never as scared for her body structure. "You don't know?! Since you were sent to the moon, teenagers saw your dark clothing, makeup and piercings as a way to rebel against their parents, so they dyed their coats black, wore piercings, performed rituals, and lots and lots of dark and gloomy stuff in order to annoy their parents and proclaim themselves different! Though, looking back on it now, since so many ponies were doing it, they kinda all looked the same..."

Nightmare Moon slowly stepped away from Cadence as she looked over at Celestia and Chrysalis, the former of which was sighing and lowering her frying pan as she remembered Cadence's 'phase' into that. "Yeah, I remember when Cadence picked up on that goth trend...By Faust, that is not something I want to go through again; she was an absolute terror to raise."

Cadence stepped up towards Celestia, with a scowl on her face. "You were just being a hater tater alligator, Tia! You wouldn't understand the importance of goth during that time, and ponies still dress up in gothic fashions today! Even I dressed up like this because you wouldn't let me express my freedom when you raised me."

An exasperated looking Celestia responded to the claim of not letting Cadence express herself with a flat tone of voice. "You dressed up like that because I took away your dessert privileges away for a week."

"Which means I was justified in embracing the goth culture! Oh, and, I set fire to that icky pillow cover you bought me."

That was something Celestia wasn't expecting, judging by the immensely loud voice she screamed in. "YOU DID WHAT? I MADE THAT WITH MY OWN BLOOD, SWEAT, AND TEARS! MOSTLY TEARS!"

Cadence gagged, and shuddered at remembering the 'gift' she was given; a small pillow cover that was very similar to Celestia's mane, in both looks and how it felt. "That's why I didn't want it! That's such a literal gift, auntie, and that was disgusting!"

"It was an expression of speech that has nothing to actually do with blood, sweat, and tears, and it most certainly was not meant to be taken literally!"

"...You need to explain things better next time. This is why we have problems, Tia!"

Chrysalis rolled her eyes as Celestia and Cadence continued to bicker, and nudged Nightmare Moon gently, getting her attention. "What do you want, Chrys?"

"Just wanted to tell you something. You know, we can leave, if you're feeling uncomfortable. Cady likes to argue a lot and Tia is very stubborn, so they'll probably be here for a few hours before they realize that we're gone, and follow us back into the castle. It's getting cold, and I'm not going to stay out there with them along with the chance of somehow getting dragged into all of this. That happens a lot."

Nightmare Moon swapped her gaze over to the two alicorns, who seemed to be strangling each other. "Shouldn't we stay nearby, though, in case they try to kill each other, like, right now? I'm pretty sure that's not safe"

Chrysalis shook her head as she looked into her shopping bags for a candy bar. "Nah. They'll be fine."

A doubtful Nightmare Moon began walking towards the castle, accompanied by Chrysalis. "If you say so." The two alicorns walked off, leaving behind the other two alicorns that somehow began bickering over socks and what effect they had when placed on a horn.

Author's Note:

Chrysalis and Cadence go shopping

Celestia's horn makes a nice slurpee catcher

All alicorns need are scarves in order to brave the cold

Nightmare Moon inspired the goth fashion

Cadence likes to rhyme words

Comments

[Vidhwansak]

Added alternate universe tag because now the story is kinda just begging for it in later chapters

[Bakmah Genesis]

This will be very interesting indeed_

[zyr1987]

Goth Cadance

Anyway, why do alicorns always try to kill each other when they argue?

[Shadowstalker]

Ah, family love~
Don't ya just love it?

[Lloxie]

3067809

They're immortal god-things. I imagine they practically -have- to scale things up for things to be interesting. XD Things that would merely bother normal ponies hardly register for them, so they have to resort to far more intense shenanigans. >w< That's my theory anyway.

[granitecrab]

lulu, moonie, Chrys, and Caddy find out about metal?

or some off brands of rock.

i thank it be funny for then to start to like it and headbang and then tia comes to find out what all the noise is about and then gets a face full of "far from over" by rev theory or something a bit louder like five finger death punch.

all in all it be funny i think.

[xv22shasokais]

Celestia (the Princess of Harmony) and Cadance (the Princess of Love) is trying to kill each other.
Chrysalis (the Princess of Changelings who invaded Canterlot once) and Nightmare Moon (the "Princess" of Eternal Night, supposedly anyway) is simply walking by for fear of getting caught.
See the irony? Immortals, pffft.

Oh, and a typo, I guess.

"Chrys, you do not tease me by throwing an empty slurpee on by horn! You know how much we love them!"

Is it supposed to be "my"?

[Smirkythread]

The two alicorns walked off, leaving behind the other two alicorns that somehow began bickering over socks and what effect they had when placed on a horn.

And suddenly, a fetish is born.

[Razzy]

Lel. Gothdance.

[emeraldhuskydragon0]

"You were just being a hater tater alligator, Tia!"

This made me laugh