Little loony Luna and crazy caffeinated Celestia's life in Canterlot

by Vidhwansak

I've fulfilled that promise, Tia! (Colgate Arc)

I've fulfilled that promise, Tia! (Colgate Arc)

Tension was everywhere; in the air, ponies, and especially in us ponies under the contract, Tia. You assigned a great many of us to look after the Elements of Harmony, and while that helped in terms of giving us less duties, it also meant that you were spending less time training each pony, to the point where you only gave ponies under your contract the most basic battle-practice instead of teaching them the history of their position and the more advanced techniques of war, which most likely was the reason so many of us fell that day. Heartstrings and I were guarding the Elements at the time. I was taking a little nap when...

"Minuette." The sound of her partner's voice caused Minuette to look up with a yawn, who watched as Lyra placed down her crossword puzzle.

"Yes, Heartstrings?"

Instead of replying, Heartstrings waved a hoof at two ponies who were walking up towards them. Unfortunately, Minuette's eyesight was blurred slightly from her nap.

With a sigh, Minuette rubbed at her eyes to clearly see two other ponies, and judging by the fact that she had not seen these ones, new ones that had been trained by Celestia and put under the contract. Again. Why, exactly, are you training so many ponies? One would think that you were raising your own private army, Tia. Despite her own personal thoughts on the matter, she knew that it did not matter in the long run; she was nothing but a glorified guard, and right now, until these two checked out, they were potential threats to the twin thrones of Equestria and the Elements of Harmony. "Halt. Identification?"

Both of the ponies spoke softly in unison the traditional contract oath and code that was their (rather long-winded) form of identification. "To serve, and only serve the princesses of Equestria and the Elements of Harmony, is my eternal vow, and nothing but death may tear us from it. Be it rain, snow, or a threat to all that Equestria holds dear, the enemies that wish us harm will have to go through us, first. We are the first and last line of defense, the first ones into danger, and the last ones out of it. We are true. We are pure. We are eternal."

Despite the code being spoken perfectly, Minuette couldn't help but think that they did something wrong, so she opened up a telepathic link with her partner. I'm bothered. Sure, there's no hesitation in the reply, it was perfectly synchronized, and they don't look shifty, though something still feels off. What think you, Heartstrings?

I think them fine to me, Minuette. Green, obviously, like the colour of my fur, as well as looking like the kind of ponies that I'd find in a street gang rather than contracted ponies like us, but they pass. Barely. You probably are just accustomed to seeing high-class ponies and forgot what the riff-raff looked like on the street. I know I haven't.

Despite your cruel words about the unfortunate ponies on the street and the passive-aggressive baiting you're giving me, I concur with your analysis. Minuette yawned again, softly before smiling at the two ponies; first impressions to rookies were very important, after all. "Welcome, comrades. Here to relieve a pair of bored ponies from guard duty?"

The mare on the left nodded slowly, and spoke in a voice that Minuette would forever wonder about how she ever managed to speak the oath without having any sign of her accent bleeding through. "Ya. Name iz Cloud Kickah. Mare next ta me is Sassyflash."

A groan came from the turquoise pony. "It's 'Sassaflash', not 'Sassyflash'."

Cloud Kicker cuffed Sassaflash over the ear with a scowl on her face. "Whaeva, ya try speakin' wid mah accent. N' way, we be takin' over a pair of ya posts, n' I'd be glad ta take yers, Minuette, Heartstings. I've gone and done a 'lil research on ya two; yew two are almost due fer 'retirement'. Hows it feel?"

Ah; a pony that does some research on their fellow guardians a bit. I'm glad we aren't leaving the Eternal guard in the hooves of total idiots and rookies. "It'll be nice," Minuette spoke softly, dreaming of the day where she and Heartstrings could live a normal life. "I have seen so many new things over the past one-hundred years, and while I thank Celestia and Luna for taking me in, introducing to my partner Heartstrings, and braving the perils that have plagued Equestria, I think it's time that I finally live my own life, experiencing the things that other ponies can that I myself cannot."

Heartstings chirped in, eager to add her input. "Oh, yes, it will be wonderful to finally be a normal pony, although I have no wish to be back on the streets, where the princesses found me."

The mare nodded, taking the time to mull over the answers before speaking. "I see. Well, Sassyflash, let's g-"

Cloud Kicker never finished that sentence because a giant explosion occurred, blowing open a hole in the ceiling and instinctively lowering all four ponies into battle-ready stances. What they didn't expect to see, though, was a pair of battered, singed, and wounded ponies fall down from the ceiling. Immediately, all four ponies scrambled up to them, and Minuette realized that these ponies were under the same contract that she and Heartstrings were under.

Oh, Faust; this doesn't look too good. "Heartstings, condition, stat!"

"Waaaay ahead of you. They're alive, but barely. Unconscious. Can survive to live another day; these ponies are tough." Heartstrings looked up at the gaping hole in the ceiling, frowning slightly. "A few days rest and magical healing influence should fix them up."

...Alright, that's reassuring...Somewhat. But why was there an explosion, and a pair of contracted ponies that seem to be suffering from the result of it?

Minuette's question was answered as two alicorns suddenly crashed through the same ceiling that the two ponies came through, causing the four guardians to quickly back up towards the Elements of Harmony (with Cloudkicker and Sassaflash carrying the two unconscious guards upon their backs). The two sisters were breathing heavily, and each seemed to bear wounds. Celestia's, however, were far more severe-looking, while Luna seemed to have very minor injuries. What shocked Minuette the most, however, were Luna's eyes; hatred filled them entirely, and all that hatred was being directed at her sister. Decked out in armor that Minuette never knew she had and a new look that just screamed 'scary'. In contrast, Celestia's eyes were filled with sadness and remorse, as if a foal had broken their favorite toy. She was clad in her signature golden armor, but it was dented and even broken in a few places, smeared with blood that Minuette did not ever want to know where it came from.

...Heartstrings, what say you?

I think we're about to have our loyalties tested.

Minuette was going to ask why her partner thought that, when Luna turned her head around to face them, snarling out a command as she took a step towards them. "Guardians! Hoof me the Elements so I can make an example of my sister!"

A blast of magical energy caused Luna to take a step back and growl aggressively, and the guardians turned their heads towards Celestia, who shook her head violently. "No! Don't listen to her! She's...Possessed, by some...Thing! This is not Luna!"

I hate it when you're right, Heartstings.

I hate it too, when I don't want to be right. The question is, though, which princess' orders do we follow? We are at quite the pickle, Minuette; we cannot ignore the orders of either princess, as they have equal power, and Cloudkicker and Sassaflash seem to be hoofing over the ability to chose to us, as per regulation whenever a rookie guardian is near the company of an experienced one, and feels unable to-

Bah! I know the rules, Heartstrings. She shot a glare at the younger guardians, who smiled sheepishly at her. In any case, what think you, should we do?

The two alicorns looked expectantly at the guardians, who slowly felt like their time was running out. There was a slight pause as Heartstrings stepped back towards the Elements of Harmony, and both alicorns tensed, both eager and terrified to find out who's orders Heartstrings would follow. ...We are bound to the princesses, but our greater duty is to Equestria, which overrides any loyalty to the princesses as far as I'm concerned, so the contract will not kill us if we happen to go against one, or even both of the princesses as Equestria is far more important than the figureheads leading it. If I had to choose, however, I would pick Celestia, as she seems...A little more composed than Luna.

Wait...If you had to choose?

The ball falls in your hooves, Minuette. Promise me that whatever happens, you live long enough to tell either princess our side of the story. Shall we support Celestia? Do we give our trust to Luna? Or shall we attempt to take them both on?

The blue unicorn gulped as the responsibility of choosing which alicorn to support (as she immediately rejected Heartstring's third option) fell upon her. I...I promise, Heartstrings. As much as I hate to say it...It seems like we'll be supporting Celestia, as I trust her more.

---

Minuette sighed, and looked up at the ceiling, stretching her hooves out. "...I've fulfilled that promise, Tia! I estimate our casualties to number in the hundreds, and with such a dent in our numbers, we were unable to assist you with the political fallout and provide support after this event. However, there were just enough of us to act upon what we saw fit to benefit Equestria, namely by eliminating groups that sought to usurp your power, helping out ponies that were affected the most by Luna's banishment to the moon, and doing all the little things that would cement your power over the next one-thousand years. After that...We argued. Some of us wanted to live as normal ponies again, others wanted to continue serving you, despite the fact that we could not directly place ourselves under your command."

"That's what I'm confused about," Celestia spoke up, feeling saddened at what her contracted ponies had to go through, "I was awaiting your return for a long, long time. Why could you not serve me?"

Heartstrings spoke up, having been quiet as Minuette explained their side of the story. "That would've been suicidal. Our contract states that we serve both princesses of Equestria, and do not favor one princess over another. Since Luna was banished and had no way of receiving the benefits of us contracted ponies, that theoretically would be 'favoring' you, and the contract would enact it's punishment and 'fail-safe' protocol."

With a nod at Heartstrings that was returned, the two suddenly got off the sofa, and knelt down at Princess Celestia's hooves. However, since Luna has returned and you have found us...

We wish to be assigned under a new contract, under the both of you, with better rules that do not restrict us as much as they have before.

Although Celestia wanted to release them forever, she knew that she could use more help. "I accept, and will make a new contract for you two soon."

Author's Note:

If you're wondering how the heck I came up with 'Sassaflash'

Cloud Kicker lost the accent over time and no she's not hitting on everypony she sees in this story because she likes waffles instead

This isn't a funny chapter and I apologize but then again this arc wasn't supposed to be funny so I don't know if I should feel bad

Arc is over

I think

I shall create an information bank of sorts later for parts of the story (mostly about this 'contract') later

Oh my god I almost went over two-thousand words with this chapter without any humor, shame on me

Comments

[Vidhwansak]

Where the hell is the humor

I like waffles

3358779

Ah

[Smirkythread]

So, anything special planned for the hundredth chapter?

[Vidhwansak]

3365864

The ending to this story

Something that I haven't even begun writing yet but I hope it's somewhat decent

[Bakmah Genesis]

I still want to see this as a side-stry

[Sage Probo]

Luna listening to burn it down by linkin park
Luna likes fires in the castle.
Castles are expensive to rebuild.
Don't let your local lulu alobe with matchsticks.

[The Nightmare has Come]

(Looks at watch) (Looks at story) (Looks at watch) (Looks at story) Arrgh! I need to read a new chapter!