It's the end, Lulu!
It's the end, Lulu!
Ah, a day of relaxation! Just me, my sister, and Chrys! Poor Moonie, having to stay in the castle, but hey, she drew the shortest straw! No doubt she'll lace some poison joke in our beds tonight like last time; hopefully I don't wake up and get an effect that isn't as...'Weird' as Tia's. It was pretty funny, though, to see her in the little body of a filly; and her voice was so cute when it cracked!
Luna, Chrysalis, and Celestia were making their way through one of Canterlot's many malls, shopping, looking around, and just having a very good time with each other, as most ponies would have in a mall with their friends. However, Luna was beginning to feel hungry; the moment she'd been waiting for most of all throughout their trip in the mall. When shopping, always go on a half-full stomach, because then when you get hungry in the middle of shopping, you get to whine about needing food, and nothing's better than mall food! With a lick of her lips, Luna envisioned what she could possibly look forward to; slurpees, fish burgers, slurpees, hay fries, slurpees, fried marshmallows on a stick, slurpees, fried ice cream, fried slurpees, and all manners of unhealthy yet delicious food, all found within the food court of the mall. Especially slurpees. Let's start whining now and hope it works!
"Tiiiiiiiia!" Luna almost sang out, while grabbing hold of her older sister.
"Hmm?" Celestia turned her head slightly to look over at her younger sister, wondering what she could possibly be screeching like a cat about. "Did we pass by something that you like?"
"No!" Luna pointed over at the general direction of the food court. "I'm hungry! I want something to eaaaaaat!"
With a grin, Celestia laughed as she shook her sister off. "Okay, okay! I could go for a bite to eat as well, Lulu, we have been shopping for awhile now."
"You two have the fastest metabolism ever, I swear." Chrysalis rolled her eyes as she eyed the two with a frown. "Didn't you just eat an entire plate of waffles before we left, Lulu?"
"Well, it obviously wasn't enough, because I'm hungry now!" Luna said, stamping her hoof on the ground softly (which was still hard enough to cause a crack on the poor tile she stomped on). "I want something to eaaaaaat!"
"Shh, Lulu, just don't bring the mall crashing down on us with your voice, and you'll get something to eat!" Celestia passed a few bits (which, in reality was a sack full of a few hundred bits) to her sister, smiling at her. "Just go buy whatever you want, and meet us back here, alright?"
"Yeah, okay! Thank you, Tia!" Luna quickly dashed off to the food court, where she smelled greasy food in all its glory, being made to unhealthy perfection. The scent of frying oil and sweet treats was almost overwhelming, but also subtle, trying to draw ponies in to sample its unhealthy food. It was also successful, as seen by the large amount of ponies taking a break from shopping to eat within its clutches. Now, Luna was about to join them.
If ponies were concentrating on Luna, they would have seen an alicorn travelling throughout the food court, barely visible as a blur that went around ordering food. She bought fries, burgers, noodles, chips, cookies, sodas, and many more unhealthy foods quickly, slowed down only by having to wait to get her order cooked by the food ponies working here. To top her entire greasy and sugary meals, she bought a salad, with non-fat dressing.
Ah! I think this is all that I need to sate my ever-growing hunger! It shall be cleansed with the strongest, greasiest, and most sugary foods known to pony-kind; the food that comes from the food court! My hunger will wail in agony as the food promptly demolishes it with unrelenting power! Oh, and, the salad too. I can't forget about that. It will...Be backup! Yes! It shall be on the lookout, making sure my hunger does not strike back at me when I least expect it! Now, to top off my food with only the most delectable food of all...That no other food will ever come close to it at being the best food item ever made in the history of pony-kind...Slurpees! With a hum as she pushed her wheelbarrow full of food towards the convenience store a little beyond the food court, she noticed something very wrong, something that chilled her to the core and threatened to rip apart her sanity.
It wasn't due to Chrysalis foaming at the mouth in front of a store, with Celestia sitting down on her rump in front of Chrysalis, staring blankly ahead at the same store. Nor was it the fact that they were letting their own wheelbarrows of greasy food growing cold. No, it wasn't either of those things, and it also wasn't the fact that the mall cop who was trying to get a response from the two alicorns was Rainbow Dash, who looked surprisingly cute in the bland uniform.
No, it was the fact that the convenience store had signs on it, saying that the store was moving locations, to another mall, one that was very far away from this mall. This caused panic to immediately swell up inside of Luna; they were the only ones who supplied slurpees in this entire mall, and the fact that she was now unable to get one caused Luna to cry out in sudden pain and fear at what she was seeing.
Upon hearing her sister cry out, Celestia turned around, and wailed at her sister, pointing a hoof at what Luna already knew. "It's the end, Lulu! It's the eeeeeeeend! We don't have slurpees in this maaaaall!"
"No! Not the slurrrrrrrrpeeeeees! Why have we been forsaken?! This is not how it's supposed to end!" Quickly, Luna ran up to Celestia, and threw her hooves around her, sobbing into her chest.
Rainbow Dash could only watch as Luna and Celestia held each other in each others hooves, crying and wailing loudly, to the discontentment and discomfort of other ponies who happened to be nearby. Even though she was supposed to be making everything better, she was a mall cop; she wasn't paid enough for this. Reaching behind her, she brought out a phone, and began to record the alicorns reaction to the convenience store closing rather then trying to calm them down. I'm probably going to get fired again, but, eh, I can always crash at Twilight's place. Besides, recording all of this is far more satisfying then getting a few more bits.
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3273786
Okay
Requested by zyr1987, though I have butchered the idea to better fit my ability to write, sorry
Maybe a bit, but still it was a good funny chapter, aside from not mentioning slurpees enough
Edit: I also hope I'm correct in assuming that the end being near is just our favorite trio overreacting comically and not signaling the end of the fic is near. This is too much fun to read to have it die.
How about Chrysalis finds Pinkies party cannon and tries to use it, but ends up in jail and has to be bailed out by one of the others.
No slurpees in the mall? What terrible monster would do that?
After all this time I finally looked on the internet and I found what it is "Slurpees".
It looks delicious.
And I do not know how the word "Slurpee" translate into my language. Neither the google translator found nothing.
And I can say one thing. Luckily, that they did not go shopping in my country. I do not know of a single mall that sells those "slurpees".
Maybe in the capital city, But I doubt it.
3287976
It's more that you flash fry a ball of dough that's been soaked in slurpee.
*sees two women in distress, crying openly*
*thinking about going to help*
...
...
...
Nah.
*pulls out phone and record it*
And Youtube-ism finally reach Equestria.
3287976 You can deep-fry anything, I've learned...
The end has come my friends.
The end has indeed come.
And the world ends not with a bang, but with wailing.