M/M shipping
What happens when a matchmaker down on his luck with love meets the most eligible stallion in Ponyville? Can he get pass the obstacles that stand in his way? And will the pony he's fallen for even accept him? Only way way to find out..
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This is my first MLP fanfic so it may not be the best. But I do hope you enjoy it. I love constructed criticism so don't be afraid to give a few tips
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Looks like it could end up being a cute story..
But mind pressing Enter more often? Writing seems a tad squished together.
Good job!
This is a good attempt, but there's a lot of issues with formatting the paragraphs and especially dialogue. I could talk about that for a while, but the best advice is to say "read more fics by other guys".
I like the idea a lot, but all of the action sounds very silted. The dialogue also comes across as wooden. What really happens in the beginning? He just walks in and, well, that's about it. Keep working on it.
What Swiper said.
Wonderful attempts, and a beautiful idea, just needs to be put into action a bit more smoothly.
I applaud you for trying, and for attempting a M/M fic. I definitely think the internal monologue is nice, but the dialogue could indeed use work.
Keep it up! You've got potential, buddy.
Yours kindly
-FlutteringShy
And thus, it is confirmed about Big Mac being a colt-cuddler.
Me gusta.
I'm getting better at this.
And yes. Big Mac is confirmed to be a coltcuddler. And Caramel is going on about another stallion. Is Big Mac jealous? ... No one can tell...
I rather enjoyed reading this, mostly because I'm a sucker for a simple and sweet love story.
That said it is sad to see a story just getting onto its feet just stop dead.
I do hope you will consider giving this story another go you were improving quite a bit, not to mention I just love Miamore.
P.S if it’s been writers block I can help with some ideas, you can say it sort of my special talent.
Hello there! You have found this random story! I have not read it, as I was just entering random numbers into the URL to find a random story. Well, the author is long gone, and this story seems lame.
Bye!