A new pony in town named Orion is in search of his cutie mark, but that's not the only reason he's here. Along the way he meets some new friends and discovers a secret about a filly named Scootaloo. Join Orion in this story and find out how much Orion and Scootaloo have in common.
This fic is in an alternate universe than Rainbow Factory
Edit: due to some surprising news the picture for this fic has been changed.
Edit: wow cant believe all the positive feedback i'm getting. thanks everypony
Edit: changed name of fic to something that rolls of the tongue more
Chapters (1)
1944670 ? is there a reason you posted the last line of the long desc.
1944679
Yep.
No, they both die in the Rainbow Factory. THE END.
1944682 uhh care to explain a bit maybe
1944688 I forgot to put that this is in an alternate universe of rainbow factory
1944701 Then i'm not at all interested.
1944705 gee thanks for the support
1944709 Your welcome
1944710 so your not even gonna bother reading it then
1944697
The word in bold text is a spelling mistake, did you try and spell "common" instead of "commen"?
1944719 oh
1944714 Already read it
i know how you feel
1944917 so how was it
I read only 5 Sentences and spelling errors where found
but I'll press the read later button and read it tomorrow
but It was getting good. can't wait till tomorrow!!!!
1945273 tell mw any spelling mistakes u find plz. so i can fix them. also glad u like it
1945784 well when u put it like that. this is the first ever fanfic i wrote so sorry if you didnt like it
1945819 thanks. if this fic gets enough positive feedback im gonna make another. ill probobly make it about rd ir something
I loved it
1949941 thanks. glad to get positive feedback
Good story!
1961630 thanks love the support
yes this was nice ill be it a we bit short but nice none the less may your feutre
fics be as good
1988182 thanks glad to get more positive feedback. any ideas for what i should make next
1989056 Twilight Sparkle accidently teleports Flutter shy into the bowls of hell in which she must muster up the courage to fight here way through hoards of daemons to get back home
1990516 thanks ill see what i can do with it
Saw a few spelling errors, and quiet a bit of missing capitalization, but good first story!
1995279 can u tell me what wasl spelled wrong and where to capitalize plz
and thanks for the positive feedback
* "Ow, my head!"
* Make sure to capitalize the letter I when it is by itself or in a contraction. ~So I've never seen you in town before"
* "Yeah, I just moved here from Manehattan." Cap Manehattan cause it is a proper noun
* My friends Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle and I
* Make sure to capitalize the beginning of Dialogue.
That's just some of the things I noticed
1997655 thanks for the help
1. Capitalization errors in many places.
2. Pacing is way too quick. Gotta take time to build things up.
3. Each new speaker gets a new paragraph.
Those are the main things I noticed.
And side note, where did you get that pic?
2019435 for the picture i just searched orion and scootaloo on google images and browsed around through some unpleasent pictures
until i found something i liked
2020487
Because that foal in the pic isn't Scootaloo. It's actually an OC named Tagalong, who's Scootaloo's twin brother. O_O
2020492 wtf!!?? whats the name of the fic. i just thought it was some fanart or something
2023712
Look him up on dA
i absolutely adore this fic. i cant believe that this is your first congradulations
Sees this fic
Well this looks cute.
Reads the first sentence of the description
...well this is kinda grim.
littlegreenfootballs.com/weblog/img/dragonath/2013/06/17/panic.gif
Finishes the description
False alarm.
Seriously though, this looks good.