When River Song tried to rewrite a fixed point in time, time died. She and the Doctor fixed it, of course, but such events are not without consequences. The universe is no longer behaving the way it should. The time lock that holds Gallifrey and the rest of the Time War is weakening, and every universe is in danger.
Apparently somebody knows what to do about it. A mysterious voice sends the Doctor to Equestria as a pony to find the solution. Much to the Doctor's dismay, he has no idea what he's supposed to do. Can he save everything in existence - again?
Your grammar is superb and I can tell you have an excellent grasp on the English language. So I cannot see anything wrong technically. The only thing I could suggest would be to include some more details. Don't be afraid to go overboard describing settings, characters, actions, etc. I look forward to seeing where this goes!
1867889 I agree with him. Show, not tell.
neutralmilk sent me here. And I'm happy he did
I loved your characterization of Pinkie Pie! (Best Pony)
I don't like Doctor Who but I'll give this a look-see.
Judging by your love of "Who" I can only assume you are a nerd too. And to that I say: ohmz.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/sticker375x360.png
1867889 1867896 Thanks for the tips! That's something I know I need to work at.
1867911 Hehe, thanks. Neutralmilk was quite helpful in that particular section.
1867937 Your image is well chosen, as I am not merely a nerd who loves Who, but also a math major.
neutralmilk? Who is this dashing, yet debonair write in which you speak? His editing and writing skills must be stupendous. In fact, HE MAY JUST BE THE BEST WRITER TO EVER COME OUT OF [INSERT SUBJECT'S HOMETOWN HERE]
Oh yeah nice story
1869318 You're silly
1867937
I felt really smart when I got that.
1870573 Ah, but you can! You just don't get a real result.
This looks very interesting... I will continue reading.
annnnnd cue the opening theme music!
I think I am going to like where this is going
I love any good Doctor Whooves fic. Can't wait for the next update1
Arrr, yer fic is bein commandeered by The Princess OP Sparkle!
Join our crew and be one of us!
2267950 Aye, matey, I'll pillage with the best of ye!
That's how the Doctor got that name in Equestria.