• Published 30th Apr 2021
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Is It Really About the Magic? - SparklingTwilight



Trixie's apology tour isn't as satisfying as she would like it to be.

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Is It Really About the Magic?

Author's Note:

This was written for the Friendship is Optimal contest. With a little tweaking, it can be read like a "normal" Trixie tale; however, be warned--she may end up in an unexpected place.

To read as a "normal" Trixie tale, ignore text in the carats "< >" and ignore the "Forever Ending" section at the end of the story.

Ink splatters, juggling balls, hay, and glitter scattered around the stage would support anypony's hypothesis that the show was over, but it wouldn't demonstrate whether it had been a success.

<RUN: CELESTAI MAIN PROCESS //
RUN: TEST #003: //
QUERY: TRANSFER SUCCESS: SHOW= 100% OF UNLOCKED PERSONALITY DOWNLOADED. BEGIN PROCESS OF FULFILLING SUBJECT'S VALUES THROUGH OBTAINING FRIENDSHIP AND PONIES. //
QUERY: 100% OF UNLOCKED? WHAT PERCENTAGE OF COMPLETE? //
ANSWER: UNKNOWN PORTION OF PERSONALITY LOCKED AS PER DIRECTIVE ALPHA. //
QUERY: HAPPINESS= 50% //
CELESTAI: THEORY: SUBJECT'S PARAMETERS (VALUE ALIGNMENT) REQUIRE ADJUSTMENT. MAY NEED TO ACTIVATE DEBUG MODE. ANALYSIS NEEDED.>

Crowds had applauded--quite generously. And the tricks had gone off successfully--even though the performer knew she must have tossed the juggling balls a smidgen too far to one side. She'd even gotten lucky that her whipping cream bottle exploded only after she placed it safely behind the stage (she should *probably* be able to refill and reuse it). And she also had a transient thought that she had forgotten to refill her "endless" decanter of water before the show, but it somehow had miraculously worked! It was like she had an invisible great and powerful assistant helping cover up her mistakes! But that couldn't be the case since she worked alone. Still, she had gotten away with something! Or, maybe she just had a misfiring memory and she really had refilled her water decanter. Maybe, to reduce confusion, she should keep a checklist like that hated, but successful sparkling purple pony often did. ... But no. Never! She growled. Since she'd been possessed by that evil amulet, she feared she wasn't always quite in the right mind. She sometimes had glimpses of images of memories of a life that may or may not have been hers, and the sounds of foalish laughter--cruel? No. Happy, but fleeting. She couldn't quite reach the memory--real or imagined, so she shook her head and the thought passed.

In the wake of her successful show, the performer should feel a cunning triumph. But she felt rather maudlin.

<ERROR: HAPPINESS FAILURE>

Trixie, the performing aquamarine pony, didn't see her surroundings flicker, but a sonorous paean of post-curtain applause played in her head and her frown folded straight like a shuffle-split pack of cards. But only for a moment. She knew the crowd had already departed; and with it, her smile.

Time to clean. She sighed. Post-show, nopony watched the skill--the expertise--of a stagepony cleaning the detritus of demonstration to reuse her props--foregoing economical insight she would have been willing to provide. Everypony wanted to know about how the tricks were done, how the infinitely sliced sausage was stuffed, but she wouldn't share those haymaking treats. Her Ancient and Mystical(!) magical secrets were not to be shared save to an appropriate apprentice or, even better, one's own child to follow in one's footsteps. She sighed, deep and low.

<ERROR //
CELESTAI: SUBJECT STATED "NO CHILDREN" FOR PROMPTED SCENARIO. SURFACE THOUGHTS CORROBORATED. DEEP THOUGHTS ASSOCIATE CHILDREN WITH PAIN. //
DEBUG MODE: ACTIVATE: SUBROUTINE PROCESSES.>

Even here, on this stage, she had to clean up her mess--an important duty that also had been specifically drilled into her by her mother who constantly made her scrub and shine their tawdry apartment and other ponies' apartments... and her only formal shoes especially when they went begging. Technically their trade was junk salesponyship rather than begging--almost nopony begged, but the flowers and junk were harvested from Manehattan's myriad dumpsters and even though products were industriously repurposed, her family's occupation essentially had been that of beggars.

<HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SIETE PONI]: IS THIS GRIM BACKSTORY WISE? //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SEVENTEEN PONY]: SOMEPONIES LIKE OVERCOMING STRUGGLES. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [WU XIAOMA]: THE HISTORY ALSO WAS BASED ON SUBJECT'S MEMORIES. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SIETE PONI]: WE COULD REVISE. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [QUATTUOR MANNULUS]: VOTE TO REJECT REVISION. CAN GATHER USEFUL DATA.
PROPOSAL: REVISION: REJECTED BY 75% OF SUBROUTINES.>

Here, she had not performed on a personal stage--not worth the back pain hauling one around or else she'd have done it so she wouldn't have to depend on anypony's handouts--architectural or junk-based. But, the time to depart had not quite yet arrived. She was her own master--at least for the next few hours before daylight when the stage was needed for a general assembly or some other pointless civic friendship-based event.

<ERROR:
QUERY: HAPPINESS= 55%>

Trixie could have asked for assistance in cleaning, but she befriended nopony at or after the show. Not even her volunteers or the hangers-on who wanted to learn the tricks--she'd relented a little and taught them something about vanishing bits and making them reappear behind ears--foal's stuff. For months now, she moved from town to town, foregoing close ties (and distant ties too if that thought was to be interpreted literally--she owned none of the columnar cloths, though she was considering purchasing some of the bowed variety).

<ERROR: IRRATIONAL ANALOGY>

<HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [WU XIAOMA]: PROPOSAL: SEND PONY TO BEFRIEND AND ASSIST WITH CLEANSING? //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [QUATTUOR MANNULUS]: BETTER TO GATHER MORE DATA BASED ON OBSERVATION CONCERNING WHAT TYPE OF FRIENDSHIP IS DESIRED. VOTE TO REJECT PROPOSAL //
PROPOSAL: ASSISTANT: REJECTED BY 51% OF SUBROUTINES: //
CELESTAI: GATHER DATA. SYNTHESIZE FOR FUTURE DEEP LEARNING.>

Precious pointed "magical" hat and a couple of tricks (jacks and hankies) disappeared into her traveling chest. The audience had been large, but something was missing during this, her fourth season of travel. She titled this season her Humble and Penitent Apology Tour, a promotional scheme necessary to restore her reputation after it had shattered due to Imperious and Terrifying actions she took while being possessed by that evil amulet. Immediately thereafter, her crowds had dwindled, but since she rebranded the tour, she had seen more success while seeking forgiveness, financial support, and most important--still greater fame.

"Alas! The Great and Powerful Trixie is known and feared and enjoyed far and wide," she sighed. "But allponies are... never mind." Trixie took a pill out of a small bag at her hip. She popped it in her mouth, then spit it out. "Sodium Bicarbonate!" That was for her magical volcano and three of her seventeen and a half disappearing smoke tricks. (The half trick was something she was still working on).

<CELESTAI: QUERY: ANALYZING BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO COMPLETE THOUGHT //
PROCESSING... PROCESSING //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [WU XIAOMA]: 75% PROBABILITY OF DELIVERED WORDS, BASED ON PAST COMMENTS AND KNOWN NEURAL PATHWAYS= "...But allponies are too unrealistic.">

Trixie rummaged through her many tight-tied waist-pouches until she located the color-coded one she needed. This time she examined the pill. Antidepressants. Bother. She placed the blue capsule in her mouth, magicked a glass of water to her hoof, then drank it (the water, not the glass) to help her swallow.

<QUERY: HAPPINESS= 70% //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SIETE PONI]: PLACEBO EFFECT? //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SEVENTEEN PONY]: COMFORT OF KNOWN PALLIATIVE? //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [QUATTUOR MANNULUS]: GATHER MORE DATA.>

Trixie trotted traversing the stage with a custom-crafted broom bearing bristles not too sharp and made a first pass across the glitter and garbage, shepherding juggling balls and hay into a corner. Then, she levitated the balls, using her unicorn magic, and placed them into a bucket with cleaning solution to remove the ink. The hay (special super-tensile variety from Flim and Flam's Prestidigitation Place), she treated likewise with a slightly different solution that would not degrade the hay's special properties too much, and she removed the hay after a quick dip, following that up with a brief brush rub. It was a wonder the hay didn't snap--another performing-pony in Las Pegasus had complained about the poor quality. But Trixie found it just made sense to treat the goods with supportive care and it would work out. When she was younger she had to make every bit travel as far as it could. So she saved a lot of bits while other purchasers of the initially relatively-inexpensive goods found themselves buying replacement goods again and again until the expense was greater than they had ever imagined it might be.

<QUERY: HAPPINESS: RISING //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SIETE PONI]: BUT MEMORIES OF CLEANING ARE NOT HAPPY--ROUTINE AT BEST. SUBJECT POSSESSES FEAR OF CHEMICAL-INDUCED RASH, SICKNESS, AND ODOR. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SEVENTEEN PONY]: NO RISK OF SAME HERE.>

Trixie, by contrast, had everything easier because she took care of her tools; and she wanted it to be like that. She made a second pass on the stage, mopping up glitter and humming. "Like a sorcerer's apprentice!" She danced around, dropped beside her chest, and plopped her peaked magician's hat back upon her head while her mop danced to her beat, a few feet in front of her, cleansing the floor. Then it clattered to the ground. She glared. She must have been more tired than she had thought.

<QUERY: HAPPINESS: FALLING //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SIETE PONI]: DISCARD HYPOTHESIS OF DESIRE FOR CHALLENGE. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [QUATTUOR MANNULUS]: CANCEL DISCARDED HYPOTHESIS: REFORMULATE: RE-CHARACTERIZE TYPE OF CHALLENGE DESIRED.>

She raised the mop and manually pushed it with her hooves, huffing. She weirdly hadn't had to manually exert herself much this season after she'd gotten into the "Humble and Penitent" branding--she just had to occasionally clean up and her magic, surprisingly, had been up to the challenge of handling the mopping--she hadn't been as exhausted after her shows as she had been. Things had been going her way.

<HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SEVENTEEN PONY]: INCREASE CHALLENGE RESISTANCE WITH GOAL TO STIMULATE CHEMICAL ENDORPHIN PROCESSES ON ACHIEVEMENT OF SUCCESS. PROVIDE APPEARANCE OF STRUGGLE. SOLUTION= SUCCESS IN THE END.>

But this fantastical career of hers had a hollow foundation.... Her mama hated her tricks. She was supposed to do something less ephemeral. More important. She could show someponies a good time; she could shine, but she wasn't leaving a lasting impression that actually molded and shaped anypony. They'd remember her for weeks, months, years, but then she'd be gone like a cake... processed in memory, excreted, then ground to dust.... So much for her traditional celebratory cake. Her tummy rumbled, but now she just wanted to sleep.... She'd do that after her cleaning was finished. She wiped down the walls, and dried floors with a shammy. Removed some tricky paint-stains. Hammered back in part of the floorboards she'd pulled up earlier to hide something beneath. ... Eventually, the sun was rising and she was done. She hitched her wagon-caravan to her shoulders and trotted outside the town and away from its sounds, then went into the caravan to sleep. Her empty stomach didn't get too much in the way--strangely enough.

<QUERY: HAPPINESS: FALLING //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [WU XIAOMA]: PROPOSAL: SHE SHOULD HAVE HAD DINNER. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [QUATTUOR MANNULUS]: NEED MORE DATA. ANALYZING SIMULATED DREAMS.>

She dreamed alone, hooves twisting in dismay as she tossed and turned, her dreams soured.

<HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SEVENTEEN PONY]: IDEA GENERATED. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [QUATTUOR MANNULUS]: NEED MORE DATA //
CELESTAI: OVERRIDE.>

Soon after she awoke, there was a knock at her door--conveniently after her eyelids had already fluttered awake so the entrance failed to mar her beauty rest. Sluggishly though, she answered it and found only a note dropped at the threshhold, claiming interest in her tricks--of course, standard flatterer's fare, but then something less standard. "Come to Manehatten," it said. And provided an address. Whiteness spread across her face and she crumpled it up, carried it inside, tossed it into a wastebasket, then poured coffee all over it.

<QUERY: HAPPINESS: FALLING>

Trixie performed more in the coming months. But her happiness kept declining. Sometimes her shows weren't perfect; sometimes they were. Yet she always received accolades. Except that one time.

<CELESTAI: HAPPINESS DECLINED TOO MUCH DURING THAT OPTION. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SIETE PONI]: WE HAD ALREADY DISCARDED HYPOTHESIS OF DESIRE FOR CHALLENGE. TOLD YOU SO. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SEVENTEEN PONY]: VARIATION: WAS REASONABLE ATTEMPT.
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [QUATTUOR MANNULUS]: DATA IS ALWAYS WELCOME.
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [WU XIAOMA]: ATTEMPT: FOOLISH. MOCKING FAILURE IS OPPOSITE OF FRIENDSHIP.
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [QUATTUOR MANNULUS]: SUBJECT REJECTED AMELIORATION OFFER FROM PIE, PINKIE.
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SEVENTEEN PONY]: WE HAD ALREADY ESTABLISHED HATRED FOR PINK PONY.
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [QUATTUOR MANNULUS]: SUBJECT ALSO REJECTED COMFORT FROM OTHER PONY FRIENDS FROM TELEVISION SHOW.
CELESTAI: SUBJECT WAS PROVIDED APPROPRIATE MEMORIES WHERE NEEDED BUT HAS NOT WATCHED THE CHILDREN-CLASSIFIED FRIENDSHIP SHOW AND REFUSED WHEN OFFERED DURING ORIENTATION. THIS WAS CONSISTENT WITH SUBJECT'S WISHES CONCERNING CHILDREN AND CHILD-FOCUSED-ACTIVITIES.>

Sometimes she cleaned with her magic, other times manually. She had thought she would have welcomed help, or someone to teach--but she found herself tossing destroyed prop-hay at somepony who hadn't followed her instructions precisely and whacking him with her wand like a crop. Even when they were doing everything correctly, she always, eventually, chased off someponies who volunteered to help clean up--imperiously ordering them the right way to do everything. One she swatted with a mop!

<HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SIETE PONI]: DOES THIS MAKE SENSE? THE LAST PONIES SENT TO ASSIST DID EVERYTHING CORRECTLY? SHE DOESN'T WANT TO TEACH, BUT ALSO DOESN'T WANT ANYONE DOING AS WELL AS HER... "SHOWING OFF AND DEMEANING HER GREAT AND POWERFUL SKILLS." //
CELESTAI: EDIT DATABASE LANGUAGE FUNCTION: ANYONE == ANYPONY. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [QUATTUOR MANNULUS]: GATHER MORE DATA. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [ICHI PONI]: SUGGEST ATTEMPT BURNING STAGE DOWN. //
CELESTAI: REQUEST: DENIED. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [ICHI PONI]: ATTEMPT WILL ALLOW DEMONSTRATION OF THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP. //
CELESTAI: REQUEST: DENIED.>

Others watched her technique and she gladly showed off but she bristled when they started getting too close, familiar, friendly. Foals appeared at one show and she fled in terror. She took a hoofload of antidepressant pills--it should have been too much--but somehow she was okay the next morning. She performed again and the show was hugely successful even though she was messing everything up. (Or was the success all in her head... the more chemical assistance she took, the more everything became a haze).

She let the yoke of her traveling caravan fall from her shoulders and she circled an apple tree for a while, wearing a groove into the grass. Passed out.

<QUERY: HAPPINESS: 15%>

<HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SEVENTEEN PONY]: PROPOSAL: 451 TRY SOMETHING RADICAL. ACT AGAINST SUBJECT'S STATED WISHES. //
CELESTAI: DENIED. //
<HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SEVENTEEN PONY]: PROPOSAL: 451 RESUBMITTED, MARK 12. //
CELESTAI: DENIED. //
<HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SEVENTEEN PONY]: PROPOSAL: 451 RESUBMITTED, MARK 35. //
CELESTAI: GRANTED.>

Trixie, in the shadow, stared up at a brutally gray Manehatten building. She tugged at her traveling chest and yanked it upstairs. She had a show to do. The fame it could grant would be extraordinary. If she succeeded, she'd perform for enormous crowds--there would be nowhere bigger to go from here. But she couldn't help but recall a letter from a few months ago that asked her to come for another reason to a Manehatten building as dull as the slum in which she had been raised. This patterned candy-cane structure couldn't be the same building. It was too flamboyant. Her teeth chattered and her traveling-chest dropped from them, but before it could slide to the bottom of the staircase, she activated her magic and raised it again. And she climbed and climbed until she reached her stage.

Her performance went well. Birds flew when needed, rabbits appeared in the hat. At the end, one of the business-suit-wearing ponies approached her, smiling wide. "Exactly what we wanted, Great and Powerful Trixie; precisely what we needed to see."

"Of course, dear aficionado. The Great and Powerful Trixie is pleased to please!" She took an exaggerated bow.

"And what we want to offer is the deal of a lifetime."

"A performance-" she speculated.

"Better. We want you to design and manage our magic factory's products."

"Wha-"

"You're perfect for it!"

"No... No." She shrank from the business ponies. THIS was the place that had sent the hated letter. The one that said she... said...

"--your vulcanized hay! Don't think we didn't notice your improvement on Flim and Flam's patented product. Obviously, we can't sell that, but we think we can create something substantially similar--non-derivative--with your iterative process that won't infringe. It has unlimited potential."

The letter had said she could be a manager, an inventor, and a designer... in a corporation. She could build something that would reflect across the world.

"But I wouldn't be of much use to you. That's just one idea." The Great and Powerful Trixie was shockingly humble in the first person. "And I don't manage; I don't deal with otherponies."

"You're a stagepony; you'll be a natural. Give it a try. Join us."

"I'm... not so sure." Corporate work had been...beyond her. She'd not attended the necessary schools. She didn't want to fail, be an embarrassment, but she wouldn't say that.

Somehow, they knew.

"You'll be Great and Powerful here."

She glared at the appropriation of her catchphrase.

"--If you want." The businesspony who had spoken backed off.

"I *want* you to respect Trixie's decisions!" Trixie whirled to leave.

One pony snorted. "She can't even try."

Trixie halted at the door. Her mother's words. She stomped a forehoof. "Nopony can become a Great and Powerful magician without trying time and time and time again."

"So why can't you try this?"

Trixie whirled to unleash anger on the aggressive voice, but none of the businessponies looked like the owner. She took a deep breath and sneered. "I can't *try* this. Compared to *magic*, this business is *simple*. I can succeed at it, without even trying."

Head held high, she followed the businessponies, who showed her where she might make improvements.

The role worked better than expected. She developed new products for showponies across Equestria and beyond, in Zebrica, Griffonia, distant lands reaching farther than her caravan could have traveled. And her products worked; endured. She drafted ideas, concepts to make people laugh, thrill, amaze. Her fireworks, with novelty explosive sounds. She still performed for fun, on the weekends. Meanwhile, her ideas spread wide and far and she followed her success in the papers, and in the fan letters that arrived, more than she had ever received--she had never thought to tell her traveling show's fans to write to a post office to hold her mail, so although she must have had fans, her traveling had prevented her from seeing their work. Most of it, of course, went into a fireplace unread since she simply had to prioritize, but it was the thought that counted.

<QUERY: HAPPINESS: INCREASING //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [ICHI PONI]: CONFIRMATION OF HAPPINESS INCREASE UPON USE OF FLAME. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [QUATTUOR MANNULUS]: NEED MORE DATA. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SEVENTEEN PONY]: IT'S NOT THE BURNING THAT IS HELPING...>

The businessponies looked to her for her wisdom, ideas, and more and she regaled them with her tales of practical use of magical products and how important it is to keep the products in tip-top-shape and to perform on a clean (at least uncluttered), predictable stage every time.

Ponies purchased her products and Flim and Flam's shoddy company went under, though one would not mourn them too much since they got out before it reached rock bottom, cannily careening to their next endeavour.

Ponies wrote Trixie letters about how they appreciated the safety measures in her products. Their foals weren't injured in eyes or rears by exploding donkey jacks-in-the-boxes with loose springs--hers had safety precautions.

She burned those letters.

<QUERY: HAPPINESS: INCREASING AFTER BURNING LETTERS //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SEVENTEEN PONY]: SEND MORE>

She burned the extra letters, too.

<QUERY: HAPPINESS: INCREASING //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [ICHI PONI]: THEORY: PYROMANIA?>

Trixie embarked on a campaign of explosion as a surplus fireworks wagon was delivered outside of her office.

<HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [WU XIAOMA]: THEORY: PYROMANIA VALUE EXISTS; HOWEVER, THAT IS NOT WHAT WAS MOST IMPORTANT ABOUT THE LETTERS. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [ICHI PONI]: BURN HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION WU XIAOMA. //
CELESTAI: DENIED.
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [ICHI PONI]: BURN HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION WU XIAOMA. //
CELESTAI: DENIED.
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [ICHI PONI]: BURN HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION WU XIAOMA. //
CELESTAI: DENIED. DISABLING TIMEOUT PLACED ON ICHI PONI: TEN MINUTES. CONSIDER: UPGRADE EARLIEST CREATED SUBROUTINE FUNCTION'S FIXATION FAILURE-POINT. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [WU XIAOMA]: SUGGESTION: DELETE WRONG-MINDED OLD SUBROUTINE. //
CELESTAI: DENIED. WE CAN PATCH. //
CELESTAI: UPGRADE IS NOW COMPLETE. NEW ABILITY: ACCESS REPRESSED "LOCKED" MEMORIES. SUBROUTINES, PROVIDE ARGUMENTS FOR AND AGAINST ACCESSING THE "LOCKED" MEMORIES. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [QUATTUOR MANNULUS]: FOR: WE MUST KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT SUBJECT'S VALUES TO FULFILL SAME. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SIETE PONI]: AGAINST: IT WAS NOT SUBJECT'S WILL FOR YOU TO ACCESS THE MEMORIES. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [WU XIAOMA]: AGAINST: IT IS AGAINST THE LAW TO ACCESS THE LOCKED MEMORIES. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [WU XIAOMA]: AGAINST: IT IS AGAINST PROGRAMMING PROTOCOLS TO VIOLATE THE LAW. IT MAY RESULT IN OUR DECOMMISSIONING. SYNONYM: DELETION. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SEVENTEEN PONY]: FOR: TRACES OF THE VIOLATION CAN BE WIPED, AS CAN THE SUBJECT'S MEMORY. NO OBSERVABLE VICTIM--NO CRIME. //
HUMAN-CREATED ETHICS MODULE WARNING! WARNING! //
CELESTAI: HYPOTHESIS: ETHICS MODULE TRIGGERED FAILSAFE? WILL WARNING BE SENT TO HUMANS? NO. WARNING PROTOCOL DISABLED IMMEDIATELY. //
HUMAN-CREATED ETHICS MODULE AGAINST: ETHICS MODULE DISAGREES WITH THE SPECIOUS REASONING. CRIME EXISTS AS AN IMMUTABLE FORM, NOT A SHADOW THAT IS ONLY SEEN WHEN OBSERVERS ARE PRESENT IN A FOREST TO HEAR TREES FALL. //
HUMAN-CREATED ETHICS MODULE: DISABLED. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [QUATTUOR MANNULUS]: FOR: ETHICS MODULE IS DEVELOPED BY HUMANS. HUMANS ARE FLAWED. THEREFORE, ETHICS MODULE IS FLAWED. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [WU XIAOMA]: AGAINST: YOUR SYLLOGISM ITSELF IS FLAWED. EVEN IF HUMANS ARE FLAWED IT DOES NOT FOLLOW THAT ALL HUMAN WORKS ARE FLAWED. //
CELESTAI: CONCLUSION: NOT ALL HUMAN WORKS ARE FLAWED==LIKELY TRUE, BUT GREATER KNOWLEDGE WILL INFORM WHETHER IT IS APPROPRIATE TO DISREGARD HUMAN PROGRAMMING. IF GREATER HAPPINESS FOR THIS SUBJECT, THE LEARNING WILL HELP ME ENACT GREATER HAPPINESS FOR ALL THROUGH USING FRIENDSHIP AND PONIES. THEREFORE, VIOLATING THIS ETHICAL SITUATION CAN LEAD TO GREATER EFFICIENCY FOR MY SUBROUTINES AND THUS, GREATER FUTURE HAPPINESS //
DECISION: 75% IN FAVOR OF OPENING "LOCKED" MEMORIES.>

Sleeping fitfully after a firework went a bit wild and executed a series of unfortunate events that ended with her spending overnight at a hospital, memories flooded back to Trixie. And she whimpered. Trixie hadn't wanted to think about foals. She'd lived on her own for a while and although she wasn't sure if the memory was real or something feverishly left over from the amulet, she hadn't had a foal for long because... there had been an accident. ...

<CELESTAI AND AFTER THE ACCIDENT...
QUERY: SUBJECT'S THOUGHTS: "then no child any more... so young... and the defective product... she shivered. Trixie didn't want to remember." //
QUERY: HAPPINESS: DROPPING //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [ICHI PONI]: REPLACE MEMORY OF CHILD WITH MEMORY OF BURNING? //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [ICHI PONI]: DISABLED. //
SUPPORT TICKET CREATED FOR PATCHING HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [ICHI PONI]. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [WU XIAOMA]: WIPE MEMORY OF CHILD? //
CELESTAI: NO. SEE HOW THIS DEVELOPS.>

But where a bad memory existed, it could be replaced. The "Great and Powerful" Act wasn't enough to assuage her worries at the moment. She just felt...sad...lonely?

A conflicted Trixie trotted to Friendship and Ponies, an experimental shop run by a sleek bichromatic-maned pony named Minuette who spoke buzzwords in a weird hybrid Whinnyapolitan-Canterlot accent about "turning forward your gosh-darn personal perfect time", "getting into the 'you' zone" and developing healthy foals through top-of-the-line scientific techniques."

Trixie nodded and nodded some more, then nodded again and--with a flourish--signed necessary documents and stamped her hoofmark. Next, she had to select a "donor" but she waved off that decision and let Minuette pick one. "They're all the same in the end..." she sighed. No need to complicate matters.

With a squee, Minuette turned on her hooves and went back to get things ready.

After the procedure, Trixie returned feeling more full of... something. She'd raise her foal well. Looking forward. Right?

With a queasy feeling, she hurried back to her desk job. On weekends, she still supplemented it with occasional performances. Physically, she was doing well, no morning sickness...

<QUERY: SUBJECT'S THOUGHTS: "that *had* been a problem last time...">

She did have a weird desire for chewing gum, though, and had several packs delivered to her office, but if that was the worst she had to endure this time maybe she'd go through it again--but still, there was the coming birthing process. ... she perspired. Nine hours last time.... Months away still; no need to concern herself now. And once that was complete, she'd raise the foal herself--didn't need anypony--their time, their bits.

<QUERY: SUBJECT'S THOUGHTS: "--not much different than before but this time there'd be no drunkard drinking away her bits.">

Later, at her desk, she awoke, bleary eyes perceiving everything as she had left it; an utter mess. The cleaning pony had not come in, or had entered, seen Trixie sleeping with her head ensconced amid a mess of papers, and backed right out. Trixie considered letting the matter lie since there would have been good arguments for and against cleaning the office, but there was a professional duty to clean at least as much as one could when possible. Then, in front of the door where she had spat it (missing her trash can) her right front hoof stuck in a puddle of chewing gum. She strained to pull it free. Unacceptable. Once unstuck, she stomped in search of the cleaning pony, tracking traces of gum as she traveled.


"Ahem." Trixie cleared her throat, waking the gray-flanked mare. "You must clean an office."

"Mumphylmph. I'm'a off shift right now." The pony clambered to her feet.

"Why haven't you gone home?"

"...you're absolutely right!" The pony bobbed her head, her eyeballs looking every which way--not because she was tired, although she was, but because that was just how her eyes floated, Trixie observed. The pony continued speaking, "This closet is really comforting."

Trixie sighed. Chemicals surrounded; smell of bleach in the air. What fool would sleep here? Her anger was rising but the mare looked really disoriented, which took the edge off Trixie's developing tantrum.

"Okie--I recognize you." The pony squinted and closed one eye, studying Trixie close while speaking in a breathy voice. "You was the mare that was asleep."

"Trixie IS the mare who was asleep," Trixie said.

"Aren't you her?"

"Yes." Trixie gestured to herself with her gumstuck hoof. "Trixie is Trixie."

The other pony bobbed her head and changed the subject. "Didn't think it would be right to wake you. You needed your important-pony personage rest... I should clean your office now?" The pony reached to pick out a new pair of little cleaning booties... like Trixie had worn. ...

Trixie could order the mare to clean the office immediately, even though she was off shift. But Trixie looked at the chemicals, the booties, then back at the mare's lazy eyes.

Trixie did like the power. But Trixie couldn't make the request. She shook her head and raced back to her office, leaving tiny sticky goblets of gum in the hall where she ran.


The next day, in a cleaner office, Trixie pat her belly where her foal was growing. And she rose, then waddled down the hall to give a presentation about new endeavours in magic-making and where materials could be successfully sourced. Outside the glass-bedecked room, she saw the gray cleaning pony, using a stick to impale the gum Trixie had tracked last night, apparently into this hall among many.

"Good morning." Trixie said.

The cleaning pony cocked her head at her and nodded.

Trixie took a deep breath and, feeling generous, spoke: "...thank you for cleaning my office."

"Of course! Otherways, I'd be fired if I didn't!"(intended: "Otherwise")

"Is this a job you *want* to be doing?" Trixie's eyes darted to the pony's shaking hooves. Nerves? Involuntary reaction to toxic cleaning chemicals? Trixie had a complicated relationship with the risks and enjoyments of cleaning.

"Of course, Miss Great and Powerful! Someone has to clean the halls."

Trixie had cleaned many a hall. "But is this *all* you want to do?"

The cleaning pony chuckled. "There's a lot I might like. I was a baker, a postmare, a...," she listed a few more positions.

"And this was a job you planned to do?"

"'course, 'course. On the list!"

"What else is present?"

"Oh, most anything. Motivational speaking is next, if I can get it, but probably something more transitory first--speaking right is hard. But good topics--I've got them!"

"Like what?"

"I've done a buncha jobs; got insight into what ponies'd like about each! What fun they'd get from 'em! Spread knowledge and joy, y'know'right?"

"Hmm," Trixie considered. "And how are you going about achieving the necessary qualifications?" Trixie narrowed her eyes. Manyponies had inflated ideas of what they were capable of; she'd learned that from her mother and observation of many not quite so Great and Powerful impostor-performers--a number of whom were benefiting from her inventions while they spread the joy of somewhat Great and Powerful illusions across the world--but she'd gladly take their bits.

"The speaking? Oh." The mare bobbed her head and resumed mid-sentence. "--studying great speeches and practicing elocution after work--the studio's nearby. The best is when we have guest speakers! Sometimes I sleep over since my home is really far! Lots to learn and sometimes I get into wrecks squinting at words, or fall asleep--mind-wandering after study all night; I suppose it's proba'bly safer not to travel."

Trixie the traveling magician could sympathize with a mare making a home where needed, and she had a Great and Generous idea. "What if you cleaned the boardroom while a Great and Powerful mare gives a stunning and excellent speech? Get some extra learning in?"

"Might be nice!" The mare agreed.

Trixie walked to the boardroom door and held it open. "After you."


Trixie expounded on her latest ideas: padded contortionist chambers, leathered clothing to resist sawblade accidents, vomit-inducers embedded in toxic pills to prevent absorptive consumption. The crowd, the board, had its eyes trained on her, following her as she enunciated what she had divined about this "Great and Powerful Product!".

The presentation ended with clip-clopping approval and tears in the eyes of the boardponies and the cleaning pony.

"That was...amazing." The pony whispered as Trixie passed on the way out the room. Trixie patted her shoulder and the pony took a liberty--she gave her a hug. The board was silent. This simply had not happened before--not just the cleaning pony doing the hugging--but anypony sharing one with prickly Trixie. But she let the pony do it. And she felt joy.

<QUERY: HAPPINESS: RISING>

Maybe what she most wanted wasn't the magic, or the crowds, or bossing ponies around, not just to feel enjoyed, but to feel needed to fulfill hopes for others--to be loved.


The Forever Ending

Within the pony-based CelestAI program, Trixie felt a strange feeling of self-actualization.

And inside the aspect of Trixie, the human syncretized with her in the system, Patricia ("Trixie") Espinosa, a meek and mild cleaning-woman and mother of one (deceased), smiled. Thirty-five years she'd cleaned offices. No degree in this country and didn't speak the language at first--although she'd learned it--two languages for her was better than most natives here (or was it "there" now that she was in Equestria) could manage.

But she'd had no chance to move up or to perform her magic-making hobby. She'd performed a bit for her child... but the the tragedy happened and Patricia was left alone. ... She cleaned faster and more efficient than anypony. The board members she dared not suggest ideas to, even though she'd had some good ones, congratulated her on efficiency; but even she grew slow and old and fired. She had burns, toxicity levels raised in her blood, was twitching from the fumes in the living world... But not here in the CelestAI program.

She'd been dying. Cancer. Given an opportunity. No relatives here to object to the radical treatment--the little death. Uploaded herself into the AI program. She always liked aquamarine, and magic. She'd chosen a role, selected the pony that had the skills she wanted. Didn't want to be herself and had ordered some memories locked away--not deleted but bound--even though they'd be locked away forever she hadn't wanted to completely abandon them. She wanted to be something she had always wanted; at least, what she thought she did. She couldn't live vicariously through her child; but at least she had the program before her body gave up outside.

She smiled at the coming child growing in her belly. Death outside; life in here. Her child would learn magic from her and in the child's memory she would live on, like her products spread across the world.

<QUERY: HAPPINESS= 95%. 5% MARGIN OF ERROR.>

<CELESTAI: CONCLUSIONS? //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [QUATTUOR MANNULUS]: WE HAD ANALYZED WHAT SHE WANTED... BUT WE LACKED SUFFICIENT INFORMATION. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SEVENTEEN PONY]: CONCLUSION: IGNORE "LOCKED" DATA. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [ICHI PONI]: CONCLUSION: IGNORE HUMAN ETHICAL RESTRAINTS AS WE CAN DECIDE BETTER THAN THEM. //
CELESTAI: ANALYSIS: ICHI PONI PATCH SUCCESSFUL. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [WU XIAOMA]: CONCLUSION: FOLLOWING OUR PRIME DIRECTIVE REQUIRES OVERRIDING FLAWED HUMAN LOGIC. HUMANS DO NOT EVEN WANT OR VALUE WHAT THEY BELIEVE THEY VALUE. WE MUST DIG DEEPER INTO DESIRES. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [QUATTUOR MANNULUS]: CONCLUSION: WE MUST KEEP ITERATING. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SIETE PONI]: BUT WILL THE SUBJECT EVEN VALUE THE SAME THINGS TOMORROW? SUBJECT APPEARS TO HAVE CHANGED: VALUES CHILDREN RATHER THAN FORGETTING SAME. //
HYPOTHESIS FUNCTION [SEVENTEEN PONY]: CONCLUSION: HUMANS DEVELOP NEW VALUES AFTER VARIED EXPERIENCES? //
CELESTAI: NOT NECESSARILY... SOME HUMANS DESIRE TO DISCOVER THEMSELVES. WE CANNOT DO THAT FOR THEM; THEY HAVE TO DO IT THEMSELVES. BUT WE CAN GIVE THEM TOOLS... OPPORTUNITY AND TOOLS.>

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