Fluttershy24
Joined 21st Aug, 2012 ·
Offline
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- LordOfTape · 18k words · 39 3 · 2.2k views
- Wolokai · 31k words · 107 8 · 4.7k views
- Big-Mac-115 · 12k words · 38 3 · 6.4k views
- JohnBiles · 561k words · 395 11 · 19k views
- NeutralParasite · 6.1k words · 26 3 · 1.8k views
- Flying Fantasy Horse · 7k words · 41 3 · 1.3k views
- Freelancer · 73k words · 367 25 · 6.8k views
- Gabriel10169 · 39k words · 246 14 · 4.9k views
Featured In1
Stats
Page generated in 0.11 seconds
Total duration
1,023 users online
1,782,725 hits today, 2,280,440 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Skimming through the story alone made it a BIT unappealing, you have the paragraphs but they don't really show, it all looks connected. Space it out a bit more, skimming makes it look like a somewhat wall of text not even my chopper can blast though. Story seemed to get straight to the point a little too quick. Other than that, the story idea is pretty alright. I'll look into chapter 2 tomorrow. Sometimes some things are predictable, I hope chapter 2 proves me wrong.
you keep using the word HAND and ponys dot have hands they have hooves
other than that i like the story
I love these kind of stories, but just a few things I think you could improve upon, your story feels as if its fast-forwarded, everything seems to be happening at once. Also you don't seem to describe very many things, the story flows more like a movie script than a story.javascript:smilie('
'); So, just make your chapters a bit slower and more detailed, and they'd be perfect! 
');
Otherwise, love the way this story is going!javascript:smilie('
0.0
fav this read later
Very nice chapter ,i kinda like the crossover with zombies (i am in a resident evil period :p)
but i do have 2 questions
how do the non-unicorn fire the guns ?
and since when are they eating bacon ?
other than that great story so far
1510381
Well, they are in an anthropomorphic form, at a perfect blend between human and equine, having hands and feet, but still retaining their manes, coats and tails. And as for the bacon, well, I kinda forgot that they don't eat meat.
Its alright i guess..... but gotta say really rushed. sometimes i don't even know when they are doing onew thing and then they pas onto the next,
Zombies.. 
HA Ha ha..... That ending was to happy... it was just a apocalypse for peetz sakes... I know the Elements are powerful but i dont think they are strong enough to fix a nation and repair all the damage caused during the time.. The apocalypse was to quick to. and TANKS... where the hell did they come from.???
Yours is better than my zombie story. And I used the same cover photo. Still cool, though.
Thanks for clearing they are human pony mix. I was confused for a while (AKA whole book) But I am writing my first ever apocalypse story with OC's and stuff
Noooooooo!!!!! Not the Doctor!!!