• Published 1st Jul 2020
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Beyond Me - Boopy Doopy



This isn't me. I am not this pony.

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Sneezing

“Okay, class,” Miss Cheerilee finally called. “I know you all have been working very hard, so I’ll give you all a little bit of extra recess. Be back inside at.. twelve forty-five? We’ll say one o’clock. Have fun!”

Just like a couple of days ago, the class rushed outside while I followed behind them, going a little bit slower as I tried to think to myself. I thought I knew what I was supposed to be doing, or at least had a hint as to when I was supposed to be doing… something, but even that I really couldn’t be sure of. Other than what the teacher told me, I really had no idea what this holiday was or what I would even do on that day, assuming there was something I needed to do.

“This could just be a coincidence, you know,” I thought to myself. “The reason could be something else entirely. Besides, that holiday doesn’t really explain why you’re… no, stop. You really need to stop questioning what happened. I mean… is it even appropriate to be searching for a reason for being here? Even if it seems completely pointless to you, it’s still not your will that brought you here… Maybe I should try to do some research and see-”

“Hey, Asher!” someone, Diamond Tiara, called, waving her pink hoof in the air. “You should come sit with Silver Spoon and I!”

“I’d really rather not,” I called back. “I don’t like having you ponies fight over me.”

“We’re not going to fight over you,” she assured me.

“Yeah,” the grey filly agreed. “Miss Cheerilee said that we get to hang out with you during recess cause you already live with those two weirdos.”

“Well, I mean, I guess that’s pretty fair…” I trailed off, not really wanting to be with either of them at that very moment. “But, um… do you know if we can leave and do other things right now?”

“Like what?”

“Ah, like… I don’t know, like… I- I don’t know. Can we- achoo!

“Celestia bless you,” the pink filly responded politely, which caused me to cringe.

“I don’t like that,” I told them, my face grimacing. “I really don’t- achoo! Achoo!

“Are you sick or something?” the silver filly asked, backing away from me a bit.

“No, I just got something in my nose,” I explained as I used a hoof to rub it. “But um, anyway, what did you guys want to do?”

“You said you wanted to go to the library?”

“Oh yeah, um… do you think we can go? Actually, is there a library around here at all? Wait, nevermind, I can’t read anything you ponies write… dang it…”

“Why do you want to go to the library anyway? There’s nothing to do there.”

“And what do you mean ‘you ponies’?”

“I’m not a- nothing. It’s nothing,” I told them as I walked over and sat down next to them. “What do you guys do for fun?”

“We talk to each other,” Silver Spoon said, leaning back against a tree, the three of us positioned a bit farther away from the schoolhouse than the rest of the class.

“Yeah, like look at-”

“Achoo!” I sneezed again, sniffling as I closed my eyes and rubbed my nose. “Is there- is there pollen out here or something?”

“Noooooo…”

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but if you’re sick, we don’t want you near us.”

“Yeah.”

“It’s probably just allergies or something,” I told them as I sniffed again and rubbed my nose and eyes. “I’m probably fine.”

The two of them stared at me suspiciously before Diamond reluctantly told me, “Fine, I guess. But if we get sick, we’re going to be mad at you.”

“I don’t think I’ll get you sick. But, um, what is it you guys do again?”

“We talk about other ponies,” she explained, pointing to an ivory coated girl with red hair. “Like, look at Twist with those glasses and ugly braces.”

“Hi, I’m Thwitht,” the other one mocked. “She sounds like such a dork,” she said as the two of them laughed.

“That’s, um, that’s a bit mean…” I responded quietly.

“Or those two, Snips and Snails?”

“They’re the dumbest colts in our class.”

“Yeah, and what about-”

“Is there anything else you two do?” I interrupted. “Like, do you two play games or anything?”

“Not the games they play,” Silver Spoon squinted.

“Those games are for foals like them,” Diamond Tiara added.

“What about that holiday Miss Cheerilee said is coming up?” I asked. “Is there anything special about it?”

“Not really. It’s just some dumb holiday. The only thing we like about it is that we can stay up later and it means that school is over.”

“I mean, since it’s in Ponyville this year, that means a bunch of ponies from other cities will come to see Princess Celestia, but other than that-”

“Achoo!”

“Okay, we really don’t want you near us if you’re getting sick,” Diamond Tiara said, sounding concerned as the two scooted away from me a bit before standing up to walk away. “We’ll… talk to you later. When you stop sneezing.”


“Why are you sitting all alone, Asher?” Cheerilee asked as she made her way up to the filly.

“They left because they think I’m sick,” she answered back simply as she lay down in the shade, a bit of the sun hitting her head and mane. “I don’t mind though. I need time to clear my head, and being alone helps.”

“What are you clearing your head of?” the teacher asked politely.

“I already said that I’m not talking about that with… achoo!

“Are you sure you’re not sick?” Cheerilee asked as she bent down and put a hoof to her forehead. “You feel kind of warm.”

“That’s because I’m laying with my head in the sun, but no, I’m not sick. I think I just have allergies or something.”

“Okay, but if you start to feel sick, please tell me or your guardians when you get back home, okay sweetie?”

With a blush, the filly responded, “Okay. Will do.”

There was an awkward few seconds of silence before Cheerilee leaned down a bit farther, asking, “Why don’t you go play with your classmates? I don’t think you want to be laying alone all recess, do you?”

“I’m fine,” she answered, looking away. “Like I said, I’m taking some time to try and clear my head, and I'm an adult anyway, so… oh, I do have a question actually. Is that princess, Celestia, is she… what is she? I mean, other than the princess, I mean. Also, is there a queen? Or a king?”

“Well, as I said before, she’s the ruler of Equestria. And no, there’s no king or queen. Princess Celestia is the highest authority in Equestria.”

“Okay, so, umm…” the filly trailed off. She tried to think to herself. She knew that the teacher told her that she physically raised the sun each morning, remembered the way she was described yesterday, and thought about the fact that Diamond Tiara specifically said ‘Celestia’ bless you. All of those things combined made her… nervous. From what she could tell, this princess they were referring to was an actual, physical person that would be coming to Ponyville in two weeks, and just that thought made her anxious. She really didn’t like the fact that this pony was, from the descriptions she heard, almighty, and she found herself a little bit afraid to meet her.

“And she’s a real pony?” she asked. “Who’s gonna be here during the Summer Sun- achoo! Ahack, ahack…”

“Honey, I think you’re getting sick,” Cheerilee said, lifting the scruff of her neck to help her stand up. “I might have to have you miss the rest of class and send you home early…”

“I’m fine,” she asserted. “I promise. I don’t feel sick. Like I said for the third time now, it’s probably allergies or something.”

“Have you had allergies before? Have you got all your shots from the doctor?”

“Yes, every spring and summer, and yes, I’ve been vaccinated. I mean, not as a pony, but as a human.”

“Well… I’ll trust you… but if you feel sick or like you’re about to throw up, please tell me, okay?”

“Okay…” she answered as she went back to laying down.


I didn’t think I was sick, but slowly through the rest of recess and class, I could say that I was feeling gradually worse, sneezing often enough that it started to hurt my nose and throat. The fact that Miss Cheerilee brought up shots made me actually accept the possibility that I was sick. I had only appeared here a few days ago, so I certainly wasn’t immune to anything these ponies were carrying.

Still, I didn’t really feel that bad throughout the rest of the teacher's lessons and heading back to Holiday and Lofty’s house, and so, as I walked with Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle, the latter decided we should pass our stop by and head over to her home.

“I’m with my sister Rarity right now,” she explained to me squeakily, “and she and I live on the top floor of her store.”

“Weren’t you saying earlier how she has something for Asher?” Scootaloo asked. “A jacket or something?”

“Oh yeah, she did tell me to tell you she had what you asked for made already, Asher.”

“She made a hoodie that quickly?” I asked, kind of surprised as we pulled up. “In less than a day?”

“My sister’s really good at sewing, it’s her special talent!”

"Oh hey, Asher, Diamond and Silver weren't mean to you, were they?" Scootaloo asked seriously. "Cause if they were-"

"They weren't mean to me," I assured her.

"What did you three do all recess?" Sweetie Belle asked.

"Well, we talked to each other for a- achoo!- for a little bit, and then they left because they thought I was getting sick... but um, they were kind of making fun of other ponies. Apparently, that's all they do, is talk about you guys."

"That's cause they're the biggest bullies in class, like we've been telling you!"

"I can't believe you actually said yes to sleeping over with them, Asher!"

"It's probably going to be awful. It wasn't any fun when I used to sleep over with them..."

“I see… ummm, how old are you and Scootaloo if I can ask?”

“We’re both ten,” Scootaloo answered as we stepped into the store, a bell ringing as we did. “So are a lot of the ponies in our class.”

That felt weird to me, because from what I gathered, they sounded and acted more like they were in the seven to eight-year-old range. However, seeing as they had no reason to lie as far as I could tell, I took their word for it, and made a note that, as far as I knew, the body I was in looked ten.

“Rarity, we’re here!” Sweetie Belle called to her sister. “Asher’s here, too!”

“Asher’s here?” the unicorn called back. “Oh good! I have something that I know she’ll love!”

Before I could stop her, she was on top of me and placing me into her gift, a dark blue hoodie with green swirls and yellow flowers patterned against it. It was very girly looking, and I felt absolutely embarrassed wearing it. However, I couldn’t say I had much room to complain, seeing as I explicitly said she could add whatever she wanted to it.

“Oh, you look just adorable in it!” Rarity told me as she clapped her hooves somehow, causing the two girls next to me to giggle. “What do you think? Do you like it, dear?”

“It’s umm…” I started, clearing my throat. “It’s good,” I lied, reminding myself that while it was a lie, it wasn’t bearing false witness per se. “I, um- it’s good.”

“You can tell me if you don’t like it,” she said, which I knew I couldn’t do, just judging by her reaction yesterday to me declining a dress from her. “I can fix it up however you want.”

“It’s fine, I promise,” I assured her, wanting the conversation to end. “Ah, do you guys want to go to the library?" I asked, turning to the two girls next to me. "I can’t really read and I kind of need your help.”


“Hello?” Scootaloo called as the three entered Golden Oaks Library. “Is anypony here?”

“I’m here!” somepony, Twilight Sparkle, called as she made her way down the steps, carrying Spike on her back as she did so.

“Oh, it’s you again,” Asher announced in recognition. “Are you- achoo!- are you the librarian?”

“Is that a dragon?” Scootaloo asked curiously, tilting her head.

“Is there anything to eat in here?” Sweetie Belle asked. “I’m starving!”

“Ugh, I don’t have time for this!” the mare said frustratedly as she marched past them, out the door. “Just browse the library and put everything back when you’re done. I have things I need to do.”

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