• Published 1st Jul 2020
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Beyond Me - Boopy Doopy



This isn't me. I am not this pony.

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Announcement

Princess Celestia was awoken early in the morning by her sister pacing back and forth in her bedroom.

“What’s the matter, Luna?” she asked tiredly, rubbing an eye with a hoof. “What has you shaken this morning?”

“It is the citizens of Equestria,” she said, turning to look at the alicorn. “The citizens of Ponyville in particular. I do not believe they will be forgiving to me.”

Celestia only chuckled at that. “They already have forgiven you,” she explained. “Did you not see the way Asher interacted with you? I didn’t see one hint of malice in her eyes.”

“That’s very well, but one filly is not an entire city. And I do not believe she was forgiving me for anypony’s sake except yours, not that I deserve any forgiveness.”

“You absolutely deserve forgiveness, Lulu,” Celestia told her, hopping out of bed now to wrap a wing around her sister. “I cannot think of one thing you deserve more.”

“But-”

“No buts. My little ponies– our little ponies– are all kind creatures. I’m sure they’d be willing to wholeheartedly forgive you if you only ask for it.”

“For your sake.”

“Not for my sake, but instead for the sake of forgiveness,” she said. “I can tell you, that little filly who forgave you would probably never do a single thing for my sake if she could help it.”

“On that subject, you never did tell me what was happening with that filly.”

The alicorn princess sighed at that. “I might have painted a bad image of myself to her for suggesting that she was meant to be a female instead of a male. Along with a few other things.”

“Is she not a filly?”

"It's a complex situation. She's not native to Equestria, coming from a place called "Earth". She says she is a twenty five year old man, and a cook and manager in a restaurant… although she might be a member of nobility seeing as she has a habit of getting wrapped up in things that don't concern her."

"And how was it that she interfered with the Elements of Harmony?"

Celestia huffed and grunted at that, flicking her mane as she looked away embarrassedly. "By getting sick with diphtheria," she mumbled.

Luna smirked, then smiled and giggled, then fell on her back laughing out loud. “A little filly getting a sickness everypony gets is what caused you so much trouble?”

“She got sick the ponies who were meant to bear the Elements of Harmony in my place,” she grumbled. “I have things set up so Twilight Sparkle takes my place as ruler of Equestria. I even got into contact with Discord of all creatures to make sure this happens. And that little filly is ruining it.”

“Discord agreed to get involved?” Luna asked, raising an eyebrow. “That sounds quite unlike him. As far as I remember, he hates inserting himself into Equestrian matters.”

“He said it would be ‘the most amusing thing he’d done in the last several hundred years’,” Celestia replied. “Regardless of his motives, I want this transition of power to happen, and to happen smoothly, and that little filly may already have ruined that.”

“That’s you, dear sister, always looking to control the finer details of Equestria,” Luna giggled. “After one thousand years of banishment, I can say you should be taking life with much more ease and much less stress. Fine turning events to fit your control will only make you stressed out when they don’t fit the way you want them to. Equestria is not a puzzle piece, believe me.”

Celestia didn’t roll her eyes, as much as she wanted to, only saying, “In any case, we should be heading out soon. Do you have the proper apology prepared?”

“I do. But I do hope you give a speech as well beforehoof, so that the likelihood of forgiveness on Ponyville’s part increases.”

“I have a little something I’ll deliver, Luna,” she confirmed. “Don’t worry.”


Before long, we were standing in the room we were in a couple of days ago during the Summer Sun Celebration, practically the whole town crammed in here. There were even more ponies than what showed up for the holiday, which I thought was interesting.

Celestia and Nightmare Moon were already there, both of them sitting in chairs on the stage, awaiting for what I guessed to be everyone else to show up. Celestia in particular was staring right at me, and even gave me a friendly wave of her hoof, one I didn’t return. I was still upset with her for what she did before. Twilight gave me a little shove with her hoof at that, but I didn’t care.

We stood around for a few minutes, I standing close to Twilight Sparkle and her friends, a group that included Rarity and Pinkie Pie as it turned out. While I was waiting, I took the opportunity to talk to the latter.

“Hey, Pinkie?” I started. “What does Caramel do all day? What’s their job?”

“Oh, she works with Applejack on her farm!” the mare got out. “A lot of times, she takes care of Apple Bloom when everypony else is away, even though I told Applejack I want to help her too. She also helps with bucking apples sometimes and helping the farm animals, but she’s not very good and forgets a lot of things. And her special talent is dancing, so she spends a lot of time putting on shows of ponies when she can.”

That didn’t sound like very much I could help with, besides farm work I guessed, which I wasn’t a fan of. I was looking for something to try and occupy my time in the day, because as nice as it was to have a couple of days off from work, the start of my third or fourth week now was driving me crazy. There was no way I was gonna be able to sit in that library all day with Twilight.

“Does he– err, she– have a job?” I asked. “How do they make money?”

“Dancing! She puts on shows all the time, and they’re always super fun to watch! I think her next one is gonna be next month! You should totally go! You’d like it!”

“Now who is this ‘she’ you’re referring to, Pinkie Pie dear?” Rarity suddenly asked, entering the conversation. “Caramel is a stallion, is he not?”

I was interested to see what she would say, since I remembered Caramel asking her to keep it to herself calling them a girl. Apparently, Twilight was interested, too, because she was staring at Pinkie Pie with a raised eyebrow, waiting for an explanation.

“Oh yeah! Caramel is a stallion!” she laughed, looking like she was feigning idiocy. “I’m so silly sometimes, aren’t I?”

“You are quite something, I must say that, Pinkie,” Rarity finished, giving her friend a little smirk. “I sometimes wonder what in Equestria runs through that head of yours.”

It was certainly interesting to see from Pinkie. She didn’t seem like the kind of pony who liked to lie, and yet she lied about this with no trouble at all. It was good to know that secrets meant something to her, something I couldn’t say about everyone I met so far.

Twilight clearly knew something was up though, because she gave me a look that told me she didn’t approve of whatever was going on. She couldn’t say anything about it though, because a few seconds later, Celestia stood up and started to speak.

“I’d like to thank all of my little ponies for coming out here to meet my sister for an official apology for her actions,” she started. “However, before she begins, I do have a few words I would like to say as well.”

That was interesting to hear. I wondered what she had to say.

She stretched her wings out and took a small step forward as she continued, “As you know, I’ve been your princess for the last one thousand years, ruling over Equestria with a heart for every one of my subjects.”

In my short while of knowing her, I didn't believe one word of that, but I kept that comment to myself.

“However, I do believe the time for a change is coming,” she said. “I have planned that in ten years time, I will be retiring from my position as princess and be giving the reins over to another so I may spend my days with my dear sister. The pony that will be is uncertain at this time, but will be determined as we get closer to that day.”

That got an audible gasp from me and the rest of the crowd. Twilight herself looked in complete shock, as did the rest of her friends. I knew almost immediately though that the alicorn was lying, at least partly so. I didn’t know if she was going to retire, but I knew if she did, she knew exactly who she wanted already, and I knew it was the mare standing next to me.

“But what exactly was the point of saying that?” I wondered. She gave me a brief look in the eyes as though saying that would mean something to me, but it only made me more confused. Either she was trying to make a point to me, one that I didn’t get at all, or she was giving way for Nightmare Moon to be received with more grace by the public, which might have made sense. Either way, it was something.

“Now let me give way for my sister, Princess Luna, to speak to you all,” she finished before anyone could start to ask her questions about it, which, from the sounds of the room, they were gearing up to do. "I do hope you are able to forgive her in the way I have."

“Thank you. I would like to start by saying…”

“What did she mean by that?” Twilight asked, whispering down to me. “She’s gonna retire? Why would she do that? Who’s gonna replace her? Will it be Princess Luna?”

“Obviously she means you,” I replied. “Who the heck else would she be talking about?” I couldn’t see how she was even asking that question, what with the way I saw Celestia refer to the librarian and the librarian walk around her like her secondary. There was no doubt in my mind. She basically spelled it out over the course of my time interacting with her.

“No, absolutely not, there’s no way. She’d never trust me of all ponies to rule over Equestria. I mean, I am her number one student, but she wouldn’t give me a responsibility like this. Maybe she’s talking about my old foal sitter, Cadance?”

I only shook my head and rolled my eyes. This pony, Twilight Sparkle, was something else if she couldn’t see something so obvious. I could only turn back to watch Princess Luna’s apology, wondering what it would be like to live in a country ruled by the pony next to me, who thought only bathing twice a week was acceptable. It didn’t seem like it would be very great.

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