- Member Since 7th Aug, 2015
- offline last seen Jun 27th, 2023
Mykin
Just your average Mint Horse writing horse words since 2015.
Mykin
Joined 7th Aug, 2015 ·
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hum, could be interesting keep it up.
10122698
Thank you. I hope you find the next chapter to be even more interesting when I post it tomorrow.
10168279
Yes, I did base this story on the "Come Fly With Me" Side Quest from Fallout: New Vegas. And then ran with that idea as far as I could.
10200636
No, if there was going to be a sex scene, I would include the Sex tag for this story. As for the Mature rating, well, if we get to the end and everyone agrees that this isn't a Mature story, I'll look into getting the rating changed. Until then, I hope you and everyone else continues to enjoy what I've written so far.
How many chapters long will this story be?
10227233
The story is fifteen chapters long. And I release a chapter every Tuesday at 10:30 am CST, if you were curious about that.
10287537
I'm glad to have finally got it up here after so many years too. And I doubt the rating will be changing any time soon. But who knows, right?
This was an amazing read, and I hope more people come across it!
10443040
Thank you very much! I hope more people take the time to read through this too. Feel free to pass it along to anyone you know.
Wow, it was an exciting adventure that took me all night. I don’t regret it anyway
P.S Will we see a sequel soon?
(Please say "yes")
10565992
Dang, all in one night? I'm glad you liked it that much, thank you! If you don't mind me asking, what did you like about it specifically?
As for a sequel? I've got some ideas on where to take this dynamic duo next, so a sequel is pretty likely. As for the soon part, well, I took five years writing this one out and half of that was spend being burnt out/lazy. So if I do start writing it, I'm going to have to force myself into a writing schedule and stick to it. But knowing that someone out there wants more from me will definitely help in that regard.
10569103
Well, I liked a lot. Starting with the elaboration of characters and high-quality dialogues and ending with a tolerable description of what is happening. Thanks for the answer and information on the sequel, I will look forward to it.
P.S. The comment may not be entirely clear as sometimes I had to use google translator. Since I still don't write well in English. (My native language is russian
)
10569653
Russian, eh? That's pretty cool. I have a lot of family that are from Brazil, so I understand how difficult English can be at times. Still, you write pretty well in English and I get what you are saying. And I'll work on making my descriptions more than tolerable next time. 😉
Again, thank you for reading my story. I appreciate it.
10569833
Yep, English can be quite difficult at times, but you shouldn't oversimplify your texts, but thanks you again
And yes, I also appreciate that you appreciate that I read your story, lol
10569894
Don't worry, I won't be oversimplifying anything anytime soon. Or at all. I don't think I would be able to do Intrepid justice if I dumbed things down writing wise.
I see the cover pic has changed.
10737698
Yep. Figured it was high time I got a proper cover for this story. Give it a somewhat professional feel to this, you know?
HA! The song have been stuck in my head since I saw the title, so time for some revenge!
It is the first time in a long long while that I see a story being made in present tense, and I must admit that it fucked a bit with my brain for the first few lines since I am so used to FoE to be written in past tense. I am quite curious if you have any specific reason for that choice, and what that could be?
In media res stories can be quite interresting at times, even if I prefer a nice little prologue and a single chapter or two to get to know the main character, and I think that it is one of the first, if not the first, time that I see in media res being used to jump straight to the goal of the main char, or at least the last arc in a characters story where they reaches their life long goal.
Was it not because you have caught my interrest with taking inspiration from one of my favorite side missions in FoE ever would I sadly most likely not stay around for the next chapter because of the two writing choices above, But I can honestly say that I am looking forward to see how close we are getting to the moon, and why our Scholar wants to go there... and if it is made out of cheese or just boring rock.
Nitpicks:
“For whom exactly?!” This part is spoken out loud, not a thought, so no need to keep it in italics
10884007
Hehe, yeah, that is a good song. I listened to it a couple of times while writing this and probably would have changed the title to "To The Moon" because of this song had my pre-reader and my editor not talk me out of it.
As for the present tense stuff? Huh, that is the first time someone asked me that question. For context, I started writing this back in 2014 and this story was the first time I ever bothered doing anything related to fanfiction writing. So originally I did it because Fallout: Equestria did it. But as I wrote more and got the hang of writing in first person, I liked how it make certain people feel like they were going on the journey with Intrepid. That and a few later scenes wouldn't really have the kind of impact I needed had it been in past tense. Hopefully it doesn't prove too much of a bother for you going forward.
I'll freely admit that I'm not quite sure what you mean with you In Media Res paragraph. It wasn't really my intent to start the story In Media Res but to follow Kurt Vonnegut’s advice to start as close to the end of a story as possible. Which meant joining our main character at his lowest point before the story I wanted to tell starts. I am actually curious what kind of life long goals you think Intrepid is going for or has obtained in this chapter? And I hope the next chapter gives you a better idea of what kind of a person Intrepid is.
I am happy that you are giving it a shot despite the issues you have with the story so far! I am a big fan of the Come Fly With Me sidequest (if it wasn't obvious enough already) and doing my take on it in the FoE universe. It actually surprised me that no one had done a story on it yet (at least, back when I started writing it. I don't really know if anyone has made an attempt nowadays). If you have any more questions, please let me know. I'll do my best to answer them.
On the subject of the nitpick, that one is probably going to pop up as you go through the story. I was a new writer at the time and used italics inside quotes to emphasis certain words and phrases. I had the mind to go back and change it, but after five years of writing and rewriting this thing I eventually had to draw a line and finally publish the story. Feel free to continue to point this stuff out. I can't guarantee that I'll fix it, but anything that I can keep in mind when I work on my next story helps.
Anyway, thank you for commenting! I hope you have a good day.
Huh, you hit the head on the nail of a pretty big plothole in Fo:NV, why is it that the brotherhood of steel don't want to look at the rocket center? Being able to send up spy satelites would be a giant boon for them, or just raiding the rockets for the motors and all of their fuel so they could make more airships. There is a giant treasure trove of very very rare tech, and yet do they not touch it. Heck there are the giant radar facility just by it there are overrun with super mutants, and while normal people would have trouble living there because of all of the gunk that hit the area would the Brotherhood have their powerarmors to protect them... Welp lets hope that they ain't more clever in this story than they are in the game and comes knocking on the door to borrow a cup of rocket fuel.
Nitpicks:
"You’re the only reason we got this far in the first place." You are missing an " in the end of this sentence.
"I open up my eyes to see both Salt Cube and Bright Eyes taken aback by declaration." Missing something here, for example a "my" or "the"
“I’m just saying that they do valve you here" I think you meant "value"
10885013
You actually run into a dead Brotherhood of Steel patrol on the third floor of the Repconn HQ building (which you can find a set of T-51b power armor from one of the corpses) for one of the quest you can do to earn the trust of the brotherhood. Which suggests that they were aware that Repconn had some rocket tech that was worth looking into. However, given that the NCR nearly annihilated them when they tried to hold Helios One and the current Elder's determination to be as isolationist as possible, I honestly doubt that they have the numbers or the will to actually take over the test site or expand anywhere. Assuming they are competent enough to actually take it in the first place; the patrol was killed by a bunch of eyebots that served as security for the Repconn HQ. I doubt they would fare any better against Super Mutants and the like.
The Steel Rangers do seem more competent in the Fallout: Equestria setting, though. So I guess we'll see what happens.