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Five years later1,338 words
Bad Touch606 words
A Drop of the Creature762 words

A Drop of the Creature

Dear Sunbutt,
Guess what? I’m drunk! Why don't we have this stuff in Equestria? Even Japplejacks cider ain't this good. Jack days humans drink it to feel good and forget stuff, and I’m feelin really good now. Hah, and its made from corn! I remember seeing some silly law about no ~~alka~~ ~~alpo~~ booze. Too scared your little ponies kant take it? Huh?

I feel fiiine. me and Jack drank wisky and sang songs all night. Pipy pie just stared at us with a stupid look on her stupid face like some lost dog. Dashie tried to make me stop, but Im a grown mare and I know what I want. Y’know jack isn't too badfor a bald monky thing. too bad hes so bukin ugly!

Wanna know a secret? I kissed him. He freaked out and ran away after that, so I drank the rest of the bottle. I don care no more. I’m gonna die here, and I don't care. Pinks is till starin at me now, and I don't care. Rambo dashie wont talk to me and I don care.

Why the buck haven't you saved us yet? Are we not good enough for you. you raise the bucken sun and you leave us here to rot. I used to love you. I had such a crush on you as a filllly. My friends all hated me for it, say I was teacher’s pet. little suckup. I didn't care. you wer my sun and I loved you. I never told anypony. I grew up and made new friends, learned how stupid I was for my stupid stupid crush.

I HATE YOU. why couldn you just let me be happy wit my books. i don ~~meed~~ need friends. I had my books, i was happy, and I got to see your pretty white butt every day. what more could a mare ask for? And that toy you sent me as a prnk wasn't funny. My mom saw it and nearly has an ~~aner~~ ~~anuris~~ heart attack. if i was still reading my bookes,i wooden have made friends and cast a stupid spell to trap us here where we are GOING TO DIE ALONE AND MISERABLE!!!!!!!

Oh look, the pink one left. guess i’m not interesting anymorre. buck her. buck you. BUCK ERVYPONY!

Im gonn sleep now. soo tierd

Dear Princess,

I know you will never read this, but I need to apologize. I know now the wisdom of banning alcohol in Equestria, and the folly of letting myself fall prey to its poisonous promises. I forgot half of what happened, but I can never forget the words I wrote. I wanted to tear it out and burn it, but Jack says I should keep it as a reminder to myself of mistakes I made. We should always remember what our worst is so we can work to avoid it. I was a monster last night, according to Rainbow Dash. I cursed and stumbled about like a madmare, and even drove poor Pinkie Pie away. I still hurt in places I didn't know I had and my head feels worse than that time I tried to lift the statue in the garden with my magic.

I need to apologize to all my friends, to you, and even to myself. I made an utter ass of myself and even managed to drive away the only person in this world to show us any kindness. Jack says he forgives me, but I don't know if I can forgive myself just yet. He says he just doesn't feel that way about me, or my friends, and to be honest, I am glad. I don’t know what I would have done if things went beyond that kiss. I was just feeling lonely and depressed, and he was there.

Now I am alone again, and have no excuses to behave the way I did. I must work to fix what I have broken, and try to make the best of what I have. What WE have. I keep forgetting I really am not alone in this. It’s not my own misery. My friends are here with me, and sharing the same fate. I think I will find Dash first. She seemed to be the most hurt. Pinkie is still not all there, and Jack has already forgiven me.

I only hope you can forgive me as well, when we meet again.

Your apologetic student,

Twilight Sparkle

Author's Note:

Ever wonder what it looks like when i turn spell check off?
You already know what its like when i write drunk and depressed...

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