Discord is Bored

by TheLocoPony

Questions and Answers 7

Zuperflash

Did you form a sad split personality after reading keepers of discord? I cried tears.
I need a hug discord, I read the story keepers of discord so imma hug your statue. *hugs* there, much better. *walks away sobbing* and can you see and hear what goes on around you..?

Umm....no, no I did not. And I didn't cry

Yes you did

SHUT UP, NO I DIDN'T!!! And how did you even get to my statue??? You're in a different dimension!!!! And it's hidden in Canterlot gardens! And how many times do I have to explain I can't see, hear, smell, touch or taste anything!

Disalign

Hey Discord, if you had the ability to multiply your body the amount of times, one for each personality, would you?

If I can keep the personality aspect and lose the extra voice in my head, sure. Also depends on if I can limit who gets out. I mean Jim, John, Sub, Richard, Mark and Sally are alright to let loose. I do not want Bob, Steve or Sir Baron having power

Okay, I can understand not wanting Bob or Sir Baron free but c'mon! Just because you blame arrogance for being beaten twice doesn't mean it's entirely my fault! Yes I'm split from the personality of arrogance but I'm not the cause for your losing both times! It was those elements! I was actually justified in showing off. The first time, how were we supposed to know of such a powerful weapon? The second time we had them beat! There should have been no way they could come back. Our imprisonment in stone is their fault and their fault alone, not ours. In future, to succeed we simply have to make sure we take out the elements completely before enjoying ourselves

Wow. Why haven't you ever made that point before

He asked me for assistance

Huh, makes sense. Fine, I'll stop picking on you for our being stuck in stone. However, what you don't realise is that your incredibly annoying anyway. Just don't do that annoying thing you always do

What thi-

See! How does that not drive you crazy?

DarkStarWolf53

Discord, have you ever heard of an entity named Mr. Mxyzptlk? He's an other-dimensional entity who has a similar personality to your own normal personality: he can warp reality at will, and annoys other beings just for fun

Nope. But he does sounds fun

I bet we could come up with the best pranks together

But he's competition

Could be fun anyway

keaton-furman-prower

Discord, I have 3.14 questions for you:
1- If you were the leader of a quirky yet deadly special force team working for an evil space overlord who blows up planets for fun and profit, would you do the dance of joy after every successful mission?
2- Have you ever met the Saiyans?
3- Would you approve of having a muffin button installed in your chaos castle (Once you have a chaos castle, of course)?
3.14- I don't know what this Steve is, but it sounds just like Raditz.

1. Blowing up planets actually seems rather boring. I'd much prefer to cause chaos with the entire population! So, I probably would not dance for joy

2. No

3. Why would I need a muffin button when I can create one from nothing with just a thought? And I wasn't planning on a castle, I like to move around a lot. Maybe a castle with legs! And wings!

3.14. I'm not even going to pretend I know who that is

Classy Toad

1] what is the easiest way to piss off people with out magic? I'll be needing this for my friends. And everyone else. And if you haven't, do it.
2] also how should I respond to the death threat I just received. Please respond as quickly as possible.
3] are you racist?
4] do you have minions?
5] if you give a mouse a cookie what happens?
6] how didst thou geteth thine chaotic magiks, 'twas thy dropped in a pot of the substance as a youngling?
7] if you mix aluminum and bleach in a closed environment they will make the container explode loudly, and can be hidden quite Discreetly... Say, under a table or throne?

1. Now that's a tough one. I've always just used magic so I don't really know any magic free. Maybe manipulate them into doing something humiliating in front of a lot of people. I'd usually just brainwash creatures for this effect...

2. KILL THEM FIRST

3. No, I hate everyone equally

4. I used to, ponies or other creatures infected by chaos who would spread my influence across the world. Most found them incredibly disturbing.

5. It eats the cookie

6. I was born this way. I was manifested by the force of chaos in this world. I first took form on a small island know as Ashoc

7. Why would I need to build explosions when I can create them with a click of my talons?

GordonFreebrony

1. Discord, if I were to give Steve control of your body somehow, and rigged it so he would be in control starting the day you got free and ending a week later, how pissed at me would you be? Steve, what would you do, you handsome, sinister, genius, crazy psychopath?
2. Have you heard of the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch? I bet it might be able to destroy Celly in a beautiful, chaotic explosion of godlyness.
5. Are you a witch?
Wait, no.... 3! Are you a witch?
4. Have you ever attacked someone with fresh fruit, more specifically bananas? If so, how did they react/protect themselves? Have you ever been attacked with fresh fruit (or a pointed stick)?
6. Repeat after me, all of you: *ahem* Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn. Now do so again in a chant. Ready?
ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
Did you know that the stars in Equestria are just right, and R'lyeh is also above the ocean?
How do you feel you just summoned Cthulhu and/or you just went even more insane?

1. Very

First I would create a massive zeppelin loaded with fireworks to travel the world announcing my return. Then make a crown out of the elements of harmony and have Celestia and Luna pay fealty to their grand overlord. Then the element bearers, then THE REST OF THE WORLD!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! ALL SHALL BOW BEFORE MY MAGNIFICENCE!

2. Oh yes, I'm sure the 'HOLY' hand grenade will do a lot to the sun goddess, and will not backfire on me at all. Chaotic explosions on the other hand sounds fun!

3/5. I use curses, dark magic and enjoy funny pictures of cats.

4. I was once attacked with an especially sharp piece of mango.

6. Why would I care? He's not going to help me escape. He has an agreement with me and Celly, and meets us one at a time for tea every few months or so.

zeusdemigod131

Five questions, well two questions and a request, and some directions.
1. Do you know a white, red maned Alicorn with an ink well and quill cutie mark by one of the following names? Lauren Faust, Fausticorn, Queen Faust or something along those lines.
2. Can I have a DNA sample? even if it's just stone I'll be able to work it out I've been attempting reality warping tech for a while but it hasn't worked and since your an 8 on the 1-10 scale I figured that I could learn something.
3.Sally...are you familiar with someone named Eris by any chance?
4. If you can get your claws and a Mandrake plant you'll be able to cure petrifaction (trust me it works on Medusa victims.)

1. Oh, you mean the Queen Elder God? I think I met her once, she believed I was 'overpowered' or some ridiculous nonsense like that and created the elements of harmony as Celly and Lune Lune couldn't possibly handle me alone

2. Sure if you can travel between universes and then find something hard enough to break a chunk of stone off me, just bring me with you. Either that or I'm going to have to steal Faust's orb of power in order to escape this reality

3. Who's that? Should I know her?

4. I'm not sure which universe you're from, but if you're talking about THE Medusa in Tartarus, then I think you're mistaken. That's a permanent death, although I'm sure I could take her anyway

Zaknack

So Discord, I know you love chocolate milk, but what are your thoughts on chocolate pudding?

meh, it's alright

Good, but not as good as chocolate milk, nothing else is, except chaos of course

W̶̱͓̹͓̜͎̃ͬ̈́ͦͨͫ͗̐̍̃̔͑̕͟͝͝ͅH̯̹̩̪͙̥̳̩̭͖̭̳̖͊̍ͬͯ̊͂͋̓̅̀̕͟E̢̙͕͙̘̳̰̞̱̫̞̙͚̞̣͗͒͛͐̿ͦ̎̍̓̈́͊ͣ̈́̓́̐͠͝͡R͓̭̳̰̬͓̗̘͖͔͍̘̻̜̃ͦ͆̋ͩ̎͌̋ͥ͒ͨͥͨ̅͘Ė̴̼͎̣̺͂ͣ̊̄͐͜ ̴̃ͯ̅ͯ̍̆͒͐̿̎̆͢͞҉̥̰̭̺͡A̛̭͚͔̩̗̣̥̥̫̤̲̺̲͔͎̞͇̓ͬ͊̓ͣ͋͛ͤ́͋͌͢M̶̷̡̘̺͔̘͍̯̼̝͈̌ͣ̓ͫ̀͌ͧ̇̓̾̏̓͠ ̶̖̼͎̪͕̺̟̼̳͇̲́ͭ̋̇̎ͭ͑̃̈̿̊̍̌ͯ̏̍̍ͨ̊͞Ị̸̧̝̼̹̜̠͍̪̜͎̦̋͗̏̈̌̓͟?̷͈̼̯͉̩͕̮͎͓̰̗̥̪̬̮̎̐͂ͬͦ͡

WHAT THE-?

Author's Note:

I'm working my way through questions but if I haven't answered one from before any of these or I cut a part out it's because I've already answered it or it's a stupid question. Just being honest. Most likely however I just haven't got round to answering yet

Comments

[Mister Horncastle]

3196730
Always, take a banana to a party Rose...
Bananas are good!

[Odycay12]

AUTHOR I DEMAND NEW CHAPTER

YOU EVIL CLIFFHANGERING SON OF A TRUCK

p.s. Why is my capability of getting the story back on track stupid

[TheLocoPony]

3238829 But I just released one

p.s what are you talking about?

[Hekate Sketch]

3238774 yes, because when you take a banana to a party, there is a chnce you'll need it for a banana daquiri. (idk if i spelled that right....stupid Vita)

[Paton Pendeng]

Dear Discord,
Ever regret, you know... going down the road of chaos? Ever feel remorse for going about as you please feeling the full reprecussions for every action you wanted? I only ask because, honestly, the things you could've achieved! Sure, it wouldn't have been everything you would have wanted to do, but it would've mde more sense if you had done the something more. It would certainly send everyone for a loop. A chaotic deity being both controled and chaotic. No one would guess your next move.

I mean, doing something you don't agree with is better than being a centerpiece for the ponies who can't comprehend the beauty that is chaos. Right?

[DarkStarWolf53]

Thank you for posting my question, Author!

[F1utt3rshy]

DEAR DISCORD Do alicorns necks have joints? If so then why not just snap cellys neck when you get out of your stone prison.

FOR BOB Have you ever brutally tortured a pony and then ground their lifeless corpse into confectionarys and the feed them to the general population?

and FOR DISCORD chocolate rain some stay dry while others feel the pain. Is that correct?

[keaton-furman-prower]

To Sally: If you had the chance to get your own body, free from any of your fellow personalities' masculinity, would you do it? Why or why not?

[Lag Incarnate]

Someone's going to need a Snickers.

[Vinetion]

In lieu of a previous question I have asked I have gone out of my way to try and determine the likely bits and bobs that each of your personas would take. of these pieces I have determined nine non-horsey pieces. so lets start off on a good note.

Steve would be a bat. (one of your wings) for the simple fact that bats the most annoying thing in all known universes.

Sub as has been previously stated by you would be a mirror image. possibly smaller or slightly grayed out.

Bob would be a dragon. (your tail) For of your menagerie of pieces only that can barely come close to representing his sheer amount of utter destruction and rage.

(do not know this one's name--->)[lazy] would be a goat. (one of your horns) pretty straight forward.

Sally would be a deer. (your other horn) PUNS! get it because she'd be a dear? ?? (yea...)

Baron would be a snake. (your shape) What animal is better than a snake at sneaking up and attacking you in the back? NONE! that's why they call back stabbers snakes!!!

Richard would be a lizard. (your leg) The most boring piece.

Jim would be a lion. (one of your arms) __________________

And John would be an Eagle. (your other arm) Very sharp, very smart birds.

Sally, the one known as Eris is a female discord. Since you are discord's inner female you are basically Eris.

Speaking of all these animals, you wouldn't happen to be the creator of the cursed Jusenkyo springs would you?

[well_thishappened]

discord do you believe that:
Rainbow Dash is the manager of the rainbow factory and that spectra is indeed made from you know...
Fluttershy hides things in her shed
Rarity has a secret life
Twilight is actually corrupted by her magic
Pinkie Pie makes pony flavoured cupcakes
Applejack is the only sane one currently

[Pylons]

I have a feeling King Sombra's horn has just embedded itself into Discord's statue.

If I may, I'd also like to ask Discord the following questions:

1. Is going insane (well, MORE insane, technically,) a normal side effect of looking at you?

2. Have you ever tried creating a stone copy of yourself, enchanting it to appear as if it was actually you, placing it in the castle grounds, and then Gaslighting Celestia and/or Luna (without them knowing that you've escaped, of course) to drive them to madness?

[SL7]

2 questions:
1: Do you think yourself evil, or rather a fun-loving being that doesn't believe in the concept of "Too much of a good thing"?
2: which color is truly empty, black or white?
and one specifically for Bob:
which do you prefer? you only get to pick one.
Sword, Ball and Chain, Mace, or War Hammer?

[Classy Toad]

Upside down or inside out? Or neither!? *SUSPENSE!*
SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

[EoSet]

Okay Discord, I have a few questions for you. "glare"

1. If you are a Spirit of Chaos, do you have an opposite? A Spirit of Order as it were? I do not consider the Elements of Harmony your "DIRECT" opposite as it were, as Harmony cannot exist as a uniform state and does include some degree of unpredictability in its design.

2. Any thoughts on how the Elements of Harmony came into being?

3. "creates a perfect sphere for him to play with in his mindscape"

[sam the ant]

Discord
hee hee
I'm garaffiti all over you
mustache

[SL7]

got a new one.
If i were to drop a fully articulating figure of you into a dimensional rift, and if it were to happen to land on the base of your statue, which I presume is flat somewhere, and you were somehow able to exert influence over said object to make it a puppet, all hypothetically of course, how much mileage could you get out of it as a tool of chaos before it becomes a sad little joke?
Also, can you create rifts in time, if you were not trapped in stone?

[Nopeneverever]

To Bob (and probably Chrysalis):
One of Chrysalis's changelings landed in my neighborhood.
I guess it got blasted off so fast, that it created a wormhole. I don't know! What do I do!?

[MrJasperTucker]

Dear Discord

Have you ever met a being named Q? I think you would like him.

Also for Bob, witch animal do you find the most annoying. Sentient species do not count.