The Diary of Diddy Discord

by DreamWings

And they all read Entry Twenty-One

Dear Diary,

Miamore got me and Tia thinking today. But to understand that you have to know what happened to him while we were playing in the gardens.

So all three of us were having a lot of fun: Tia, me and Loony (who can now crawl around with us a lot. We’re teaching her to trot. Ha! Rhyme.) with Miamore watching us from the picnic blanket. The picnic hadn’t been brought out yet and we were waiting for all the food. Then suddenly we heard a high-pitched screech from the flower-bed in front of us.
A mare stood there, in a really ugly puke-coloured green dress and she just stood staring at us. Miamore rolled his eyes and got onto his hooves. Through gritted teeth he called to her, “Lucinda, it’s so good to see you here—in the gardens—in my home—which the guards weren’t meant to let you in.”

She ran over to us shouting, “Yes, I just snuck around the back. I simply had to see you coltfriend.”

Coltfriend? Tia and Loony laughed at that. I grinned. Miamore didn’t have a mare friend at the moment, we all knew that. He’d broken up with his last one—and she wasn’t even her so it couldn’t have been that she didn’t know they weren’t together anymore. Somebody has a stalker—somebody has a stalker. Hopefully Miamore won’t find my Diary and read that otherwise he might beat me up. He never likes to talk about the many ‘special somepony’s’ he’s had. There have definitely been a lot of them though. About five in the last two weeks if Tia’s chart’s right.

After she showed up we couldn’t seem to get rid of her. She was like a nasty parasprite hanging round a large bowl of apples. And she wasn’t into fun games; all she wanted to do was spend all of her time next to Miamore, which he didn’t seem too happy about. I don’t know what happened but after a few minutes Miamore took her to a corner and then she ran off all upset. Miamore sighed. Not because he thought he’d hurt her feelings, but because this was about the third time she’d shown up today and each time he’d told her the same thing. It was getting boring. Even Tia was bored by it and she was used to it.

We carried on playing, pretending we hadn’t noticed everything but I knew that Celestia would be adding more stuff to her ‘Miamore’s love life’ chart tonight. Miamore sat down again and carried on watching us. The game was amazing. We pretended to be a family; two parents and the foal. With me as the Daddy for once—and I was a brave Knight who went around saving all kinds of mares in distress, getting tons of attention, but always having time to come home to see my loving family. I was a great Daddy. The best in fact. Even Tia had to admit that. Not that she wasn’t a great Mommy, because she was. The foal she was going to be Mother of in the future is sure going to be lucky. But we’re both happy with Loony being the foal for now. She grizzles happily every time one of us pulls her in for a cuddle or plays peek-a-boo with her.

It was when we were playing that Miamore started laughing at us. We had no idea what was so funny; we searched everywhere to see what he was looking at. Us, he was looking at us. We stared at him, confused. All we’d done was played a game; we’d done that tons of times and he’d never laughed like that before.

“It’s funny,” he’d said, “here’s me with my screwed up love life and yet I’ve got the example of a match made in heaven right in front of me.”

Tia and me still didn’t get what he was talking about. Older brothers could speak really funny sometimes. I never seem to understand what Vain talks about no matter how I try. Our confusion only seemed to make the whole thing funnier for Miamore.

“Don’t you get it tiddlers?” he’d asked. We were quite offended actually; we were much better than any old game involving a pot and some discs. “You two are going to be married for real someday. If not I’ll eat my crown.”

Tia? And me? Going out. I know, right, it sounds properly insane. We thought so too and we told him that, but he just chuckled again.

“No. You’re definitely going to be married. Tia and Diddy sitting in a tree; K.I.S.S.I.N.G. First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a foal in a little foal’s carriage,” he sang. It made me and Tia feel sick at the thought. That was just disgusting. I know how to spell and there’s no way I would ever kiss Tia. That’d be like kissing my best friend. I’d never kiss Blankety, so why would I kiss Celestia? There’s got to be some kind of law against kissing your best friend (though when I asked King Alicorn about it he said that he was in love with his best friend. Yuck!).

Thankfully the picnic came down at that point so we didn’t have to talk about it anymore. Food fills up your mouth so you can’t talk, so boo, boo to you Miamore. Actually he didn’t talk about it after the picnic either. He fell asleep and started snoring instead. Loony also fell asleep. The maid’s left her with us to have her nap nowadays. They said she was big enough. I’m not so sure; I think they just have their hooves full looking after little Prince Cedar.

So while everyone was busy Tia and I went for a walk around all of the gardens. The water garden looked really pretty today with the shine reflecting from the sun. We were stood there a long time looking at it—that was, until Tia spoke up.
“You think Miamore’s right Diddy?” she’d asked me. By that time I’d forgotten what had happened, so I shrugged.

“Diddy,” she carried on, “I’m serious. Do you think he’s right?”

“Being serious is boring Tia.” Well, I didn’t want to answer the question did I? Especially since I still didn’t know what she was talking about.

“Diddy, maybe he is right. Maybe we are meant to be together. Aunt Marelin always said destiny played a big part in our lives, and maybe that’s our destiny. To be together.”

Yuck! I didn’t know she was going to go all soppy and filly on me. Of course we weren’t going to be together. We were best friends and that’d just be revolting. Imagine kissing her—and Blankety shows up in my head too. Wrong in so many ways.

“How would we find out Diddy?” She was asking me far too many questions today.

“I don’t know. ‘Suppose we just wait and find out. If we meet somepony else then we’re not meant to be together. I mean, we don’t love each other now right?”

“Not in that way,” she’d answered.

“Then if we find somepony we do love in the future then we’re not meant to be together.”

I blew Tia’s mind with that. She knew I sounded just like a grown-up then, and she knew I was right too.

“Okay Diddy. How about we make a promise?” she’d said holding her hoof out to me. “If we don’t find somepony to love before we’re really old—like Miamore—then we’ll try being together instead.”

I think I sighed at that point. What? I only shook her hoof and agreed because I wanted her to stop talking about it and go back to normal. Which she did after I’d shook on it. Now though, I can’t help being scared about what I’d just agreed to.

Oh Diary, I DON’T WANT TO MARRY TIA.
HELP!!!

Comments

[FightingOreo]

QUESTION:
How long into the future is this diary going to go for? Will he stop writing in it one day?
I'm interested to see how the style of his writing changes through his life. How old is Diddy at the time? How old do you think Discord is? Do Tia and Diddy get together? Do they break up? IS THAT WHAT CAUSED HIM TO BE BAD? Does he know that he's doing the wrong thing?
fc00.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2011/291/3/4/crazy_twilight_sparkle_by_necromanteion-d4d6pdg.png

[The Mobius Strip]

2663593 DID YOU TAKE THE RED PILL!?

[Honeytiger]

HONEYTIGER HAS FIGURED IT OUT!!!

Tia and Diddy, sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G. Fist comes love, then comes marriage, then comes an abrupt, tragic miscarriage. Diddy leaves Tia, and takes the tree, D-I-V-O-R-C-E.

[FashionablyHospitable]

2723244

[ResidentZeldaBau5z]

2723244
24.media.tumblr.com/c622671c040d4093e5ff6000b4b06cb7/tumblr_mnrc1homvh1s0i268o1_400.gif
31.media.tumblr.com/5e08e472eedb470ac247c9a8e502b931/tumblr_mrk1gcJmxn1s0i268o1_500.jpg

[Arctic]

3057932
This right here, is the best comment I have ever had the privilege of reading. On a side note, this story is amazing

[StageQuill]

I am so sorry for Celestia!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Unconcerned]

[/Tia and Diddy, sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G. Fist comes love, then comes marriage, then comes an abrupt, tragic miscarriage. Diddy leaves Tia, and takes the tree, D-I-V-O-R-C-E

haha lol

[Cord Clover]

“Está bien Diddy. ¿Qué tal si hacemos una promesa? ella había dicho extendiendo su casco hacia mí. "Si no encontramos a alguien a quien amar antes de que seamos muy viejos, como Miamore, entonces intentaremos estar juntos".

I'm speechless here :0