Twilight lay in the middle of the library’s main room, surrounded by various books and scrolls. She tried to be engrossed in her work but was continually distracted by Spike, who was dusting the room with the broomstick.
“We’re doing this the wrong way round, you know.” Twilight said, looking at Spike.
Spike glanced at Twilight, still brushing, “Huh?”
“Well I’m the one that’s meant to be cleaning. You’re the one that reads.” Twilight looked back at her tome and turned a page.
Spike paused, “Well, why not mix it up? Besides, it’s good practice for you to learn how to track shooting stars.”
Twilight shrugged, “Okay then.”
Spike quietly sighed with relief. He was getting better at these excuses for his slip ups, thank Celestia. He peered at Twilight, pretending to brush by lazily dragging it on the floor.
She had that same look in her eyes. That fierce look of determination and concentration. It looked more intimidating than all the times he had seen her in life or death situations. He could see her eyes moving from left to right as she read through the many words. She looked so much like her older counterpart. The sight was incredibly striking for him.
Twilight then got up and headed to the kitchen. Spike followed her with his eyes as she walked away.
"Didn’t think reading made you so thirsty."
He smirked, glad that he wasn’t the one having to do the research. He slyly spied on Twilight as she got her glass of water.
Her use of magic now was a testament to the strength of her confidence. She was levitating a glass to the sink without much difficult, although Spike heard the occasional grunt now and then. She had to manually turn the tap on and lower the glass until it filled up with water to a suitable height. Taking a swig of the liquid, the bookworm turned off the tap and headed back to her work.
The two continued their duties in silence, Spike keeping a watchful eye on Twilight. She got up a few more times but it was only to put her glass away and retrieve more books.
Knock knock knock.
Twilight raised her head, staring at the door the moment it made noise.
“I’ll get it Twi.” Spike said, casually walking to the library entrance. He guessed that one of his friends wanted to see him but who would it be today? He couldn’t help feeling a little excited.
Swinging open the door, he was met by Rarity. And Fluttershy. And the whole gang apparently.
“Oh, hello guys.” Spike was a little taken aback by their presence.
“We have...” Rarity looked about, “...a problem.” She finished.
“Oh, right. Come in.” Spike stood aside, letting the mares in. Twilight raised her current book so it covered her face.
Rarity opened her mouth but was interrupted by Applejack prodding her side. The strong mare pointed at Twilight then nodded at everyone else. They all seemed to understand, except Spike.
“You’re right.” Rarity stated, trotting the study room with the others. Spike looked at Twilight in confusion, then shook his head and followed.
“So, what’s the problem?” Spike desperately hoped he wouldn’t have to research some obscure pony disease or something equally as mind-boggling.
“Um...well, if we remember memories of you we kinda...” Fluttershy mumbled, looking down.
“It hurts.” Rainbow Dash said bluntly.
“It’s like brain freeze!” Pinkie chattered her teeth and rubbed her head.
Spike gritted his teeth, “Sounds bad...” he racked through his mind in an attempt to come up with a decent excuse, “Um...could be poison joke?”
“Poison joke doesn’t affect the mind.” Rarity narrowed her eyes slightly, “You know that.”
“Yes! Of course I do! It was a joke...” Spike coughed awkwardly. He was beginning to sweat now.
“That wasn’t funny.” Rainbow said somewhat coldly, hovering in the air and folding her forelimbs.
“Well, I’ve never been a great comedian.” Spike put his arms behind his back, fidgeting with his claws. His act was gradually falling to pieces...
“Point taken.” Rainbow replied.
“We’re getting off track here...” Applejack interjected.
“Look. Everypony. I really don’t know what’s wrong here.” Spike stated, holding his arms in front of him.
The gang peered at him carefully. Their glares pierced directly into Spike’s heart, even if (especially in Fluttershy’s case) they weren’t exactly glaring, it felt like it. Sweat trickled down his head and he began to breathe at a slightly faster pace.
“Please, Spike, don’t lie to us.” Rarity said calmly.
“I’m not!” Spike retaliated.
The mares exchanged looks then faced Spike again. “Maybe...it’s a curse?” Spike suggested.
“Now who in Ponyville would curse us?” Rainbow asked.
“Um...I don’t know.” Spike stepped forward, “But that’s why we find out!”
The five once more exchanged looks.
“Please Spike...we’ll understand.” Fluttershy spoke softly.
“That’s what friends do!” Pinkie chirped.
An awkward silence then fell on the group. It was a stalemate. No party was prepared to say anything else. Spike slumped down, looking at them all.
Pinkie Pie. Maybe she wouldn’t mind the truth too much?
Applejack. She could admire Spike for his honesty...
Rainbow Dash. He expected a volatile reaction from her.
Fluttershy. She was too kind to be lied to...
And Rarity. How could he lie to her? If you love someone you need to be honest with them...no matter how much it hurts.
Spike took a deep breath, “I-I made a wish.”
“You wished for this to happen?!” Rainbow zoomed towards Spike, grinding her teeth.
“Rainbow! Let him finish.” Applejack said sternly. Rainbow rolled her eyes and flew back.
Spike rubbed his face, exhaling deeply. He needed to end this. “B-Basically...my wish made me and T-Twilight swap lives.”
He looked down at the floor, avoiding his friends’ gazes. They were silent. No one made any movement. It was as if Spike’s revelation literally killed the moment. He curled up and hid his face in his knees.
“Well...” Pinkie broke the silence, “...that’s so crazy, it has to be true.” She sounded a little unsure of her own statement.
“Does that mean...” Rarity paused, “...that we’re not real...?”
Spike leapt up onto his feet, “No! No! You’re all very real!” he exclaimed.
“But those memories...all the good times we had...” Rarity found herself unable to continue, her eyes began to tear up.
“They’re not real, are they?” Applejack finished, surprisingly calm about the whole thing.
“I don’t think so...” Spike lowered his head, “No.”
“You’re a jerk! Do you know that?!” Rainbow pointed at Spike, looking very enraged, “Oh wait, you do! Because what else can you expect from a selfish, greedy dragon!” her voice broke halfway through her sentence.
She breathed through her nose like an angry Minotaur but sense took hold of her; she flew out of the study room and left the library. In her hurry, she failed to notice Twilight’s research which was now abandoned.
Rainbow’s insult caused Spike to just stand there. He said nothing, he did nothing.
Again, there was an uncomfortable silence.
Spike managed to raise his head to look at his remaining friends. Pinkie Pie looked genuinely confused and lost for words. Applejack looked up, lost in her thoughts. Her brows were furrowed slightly and her lips were straight. Fluttershy looked completely shocked and just stood there, her mouth hanging agape slightly. As for Rarity...
“I-I need to go...” she stuttered, hiding her teary face behind her mane. Without another word, she trotted out in as much as a dignified manner as she could maintain.
Spike watched her go. He had torn down her defences in a matter of seconds. He wasn’t her friend, he was a monster. At the moment, he didn’t deserve any sympathy.
“Me too...” Spike murmured, rushing out of the library. He didn’t know where he was going; he just wanted to be away from those sad faces.
“Spike, wait!” Applejack called out. The dragon didn’t return. Sighing, she looked at the two remaining mares. “You two okay?”
“I...I...I don’t know...” Fluttershy stammered, “But...at least he was honest...” she forced herself to smile gently.
“I feel the same way.” Applejack looked to Pinkie, “How you doing sugarcube?
“I think we all need cupcakes.” The pink mare replied. Applejack couldn’t help but smirk at Pinkie’s statement, true as it was.
“Agreed. C’mon girls.” Applejack put on a brave face, smiling warmly. She led the two out of the library.
“Wait.” Fluttershy stopped in her tracks just as the three reached the door. “Where’s Twilight?” she glanced about the room. The filly was no where to be seen.
“Oh, I hope she didn’t hear...I hope she’s alright.” Fluttershy sighed.
“We’ll worry about her later. But for now, we gotta take care of ourselves.” Applejack said, her companions nodded in agreement and they all left for Sugarcube corner.
~~~
Spike wiped his eyes. The tears had stopped flowing yet his eyes remained watery. At least he was in much needed solitude.
The truth may have hurt his friends but at least he had told them it. They deserved to know. It was the right thing to do. He may end up alone. He may be hated. But he did himself justice.
He needed something else to dwell on. His surroundings would be a good start.
He had sat himself on a park bench, though not the same one where he met Vinyl. A simple dirt path ran alongside him, trailing off into the distance. Beside him was a mature tree, its leaves were a healthy green and the tree bark was a bold brown. Opposite him, from across the path was a grassy field decorated with daisies. A light breeze made them bend downwards yet their petals still faced the Sun, high in the sky. Judging from its position, Spike guessed it was about midday.
It was mostly quiet, apart from birdsongs from time to time. A few birds flew gracefully into the air, travelling from one branch to another. Spike could’ve sworn he saw a squirrel sprinting across the field, its destination another tree to climb.
Looking to his left, Spike could see the picturesque buildings of Ponyville. Only now did he realise that he had run quite a distance from the town. It didn’t matter though, nopony would bother him here.
He lay down on the bench and stared up at the sky. Clouds were beginning to join together, no doubt the work of Pegasi. He knew that it had to rain soon so he was lucky he was enjoying the last moments of sunshine.
He continued to lie there, just thinking. He thought of clouds, animals...anything that popped into his head. It provided a nice distraction from his fears.
He didn’t know how long he was there for. Time seemed to stop in its tracks as if it were irrelevant. Everything began to feel dreamy.
The sound of hoofsteps eventually alerted him from his daze. Raising his head, he saw a green unicorn trotting in a carefree manner towards him. Her horn was glowing, the magic spewing forth from it to levitate a lyre. She soon noticed him looking at her and began to slow her pace.
“Do you need something?” she inquired, stopping at the bench.
“Oh! Um...no. Sorry.” The green mare nodded and continued trotting towards Ponyville.
“Wait!” Spike called out.
The pony halted and turned her head to look at Spike, eyebrow raised. “What?”
“I just want a chat with somepony.” Spike said, sitting up.
The newcomer looked back to the Ponyville, then at Spike. “Why not?” she said cheerfully, trotting back to the bench and reclining on it next to Spike. She carefully lowered her lyre onto the ground, right next to her hind legs. She sat with her spine pressed against the back of the bench, allowing her hind hooves to dangle freely.
Spike began the introductions: “I’m Spike.”
“Lyra. Lyra Heartstrings.” Lyra smiled at Spike, who returned the gesture. “What are you doing out here then, Spike?”
“...relaxing. That’s all.” He stared at the field in front of him. “You?” he asked.
“I was just practicing my lyre. But I wanted to do it somewhere peaceful so...here I am!” she answered.
“Lyre huh...” Spike peered at the instrument, “No doubt you can play it well then.”
“Of course I can! It is my cutie mark after all.” Lyra smirked, pointing at her flank which bore the symbol of a lyre very similar to her own.
“Never heard one before. Mind playing it?”
“Hmm, sure I suppose. Always good to get feedback.” Lyra said, levitating her lyre on her lap and grabbing hold of it with her hooves. Taking a deep breath, she mentally prepared herself and began to pluck the strings in sequence using magic. The order in which she plucked in the strings created a simple yet upbeat tune.
Spike smiled as he heard the notes. He was a fool for not thinking of music sooner; it was the perfect remedy to raise someone’s spirits.
The tune didn’t overstay its welcome though and Lyra eventually stopped, patting her lyre affectionately. “How was that?”
“That was great!” Spike made a rapid applause that sounded a bit feeble on its own although Lyra could sense the sentiment generated by it.
Lyra giggled quietly, “Thanks. I got a long way to go if I want to be in a Canterlot orchestra though.” She smirked.
“I’m sure you’ll get there one day.”
“Maybe. But I know my limitations and my faults. I’ve got a long while to go before I’m famous.” She looked at her lyre, rubbing its sides gently, “Besides, I play it because it’s my passion.”
“Mhm.” Spike replied. He knew his limitations and faults all too well. They got him here in the first place.
The dragon decided to move the conversation somewhere else, “So I take it you live in Ponyville then?”
“Yep, got my own cottage there. Home sweet home.” She chirped. “You live in a library, right?” She questioned, looking at Spike.
“Yeah, I do. Fire breathing dragon in a place full of wood. I know it makes sense.” He said sarcastically.
Lyra snickered at Spike’s comment, “Must never run out of things to read though.”
Spike wanted to lie and conform to the identity that this wish had forced him to be. However, after the recent events, it didn’t feel right. “I just look after the place.” Spike smiled and relaxed his body, which had become tense.
“So, do you read much?” Spike asked Lyra, fuelling the conversation.
“From time to time. I mostly play my lyre or talk with my friends.” Lyra answered. She looked up at the sky, noticing that there were more clouds up there than yesterday. “Damn, it’ll probably rain tomorrow.”
“Well I suppose we need it.” Spike said, lazily kicking a stray pebble from the dirt path.
“Yeah, you’re right. Don’t want dead flowers everywhere.” Lyra made a face of disgust as she imagined the thought.
“Hey Lyra, do you mind playing another piece?” Spike pointed at the green mare’s lyre as he asked the question.
“For such a friendly dragon, I’d only be glad to.” Lyra grinned, using her magic to begin another musical piece that would serve to help soothe Spike.
~~~
Twilight was a filly on a mission. She had eavesdropped on the group’s conversation in the library and suffice to say, she was a very angry pony.
How could Rainbow Dash say those spiteful things to Spike? She didn’t know the entirety of the situation at hoof. It was completely unjustified. Retribution needed to be acted out. Hearing those insults made Twilight’s blood boil and she instinctively was set into a crusading mode.
Sure, the revelation was very shocking but it was abundantly clear to Twilight that Spike had made a mistake and meant no harm to anypony. His actions in recent days made that abundantly clear. He was trying to right the wrongs he had haphazardly committed.
So that’s why Twilight stormed out of the library the instant Rainbow Dash charged out. Rage had overtaken her social anxieties. Who gave a damn what the other ponies thought of her actions? Her actions were just.
Unfortunately, Rainbow had sped out of the building at a frightening pace and it was mere seconds before Twilight lost sight of her. Despite this, Twilight deduced that Rainbow would probably be in the air, moping.
She scanned the sky, looking for lone clouds in particular. It didn’t take her too long to find one but the way it was sculpted made it difficult to determine if it hid the rainbow maned mare.
“Rainbow Dash, can I talk to you quickly?” Twilight yelled, standing under the cloud. She had deceptively masked her rage. For now.
No response came from the cloud but Twilight kept waiting.
Still nothing. Twilight sighed, finding Rainbow would be harder than previously calculated.
Just as she was about to give up and walk away, she felt whiplash from the air batter her form. She turned around to see the esteemed flyer, her hooves planted firmly on the ground.
“What do you want?” She asked, making no attempt to hide her moody state.
Twilight trotted up to Rainbow, closing the distance between the two. “You’re the real jerk here.” She stated bluntly.
Rainbow blinked in response, “What?”
“Yeah, you heard me. What you said to Spike was really horrible!” She exclaimed, her calm act completely vanishing.
“Oh, it’s about him is it?” Rainbow sighed, “You don’t understand what this all means do you?”
“No! You don’t understand what this means!” Twilight pointed a hoof objectively at the Pegasus, “Okay, he made a mistake! We all do! But what you don’t know is that he’s worked really hard to make up for it!” The pair gave no attention to passersby who stopped in their tracks, mystified at the scene as it unfolded.
Rainbow simply scoffed in response, “And that makes up for it?” before Twilight could object, she continued, “You see Twilight, all my past achievements didn’t happen. They were nothing. Nothing. No longer can I look back at my life and be proud of myself. I can never say that I performed the Sonic Rainboom. Because those memories never happened!” She said sternly, stamping her hoof on the ground furiously.
Twilight began to back down, “But...”
“Don’t even bother saying anything. I’m done here.” Rainbow said coldly, flying away into the sky and disappearing from sight.
Twilight collapsed onto her rear. She stared at the grass in contemplation. What Rainbow had stated was true. Nearly all of her life was just images. Yet despite this, she still had no feelings of contempt for Spike.
“But...he still loved me like a sister...”
~~~
“Cupcake time!” Pinkie cheered, setting down a plate of six cupcakes onto one of the tables in Sugarcube Corner. A few other ponies sat at different tables, no doubt feeling lighter hearted than Applejack and Fluttershy were. Pinkie had seemed to return to her usual, random mood.
Applejack licked her lips as she saw the delectable treats, “I sure am hungry.”
“Thank you Pinkie.” Fluttershy said politely.
“A cupcake can easily drowny a frowny!” Pinkie took one of the baked treats and eagerly devoured it.
“It does help.” Applejack agreed, taking one for herself.
“I guess...” Fluttershy grabbed a cupcake, nibbling on it quietly.
The three sat in silence, enjoying the delicious tastes that entered their mouths. The smooth, sweet icing quickly stole away their negative moods. The foamy bread easily settled into their stomachs, fighting off hunger for a while.
Once all that remained of the cupcakes were crumbs, the conversation continued.
“You two alright?” Fluttershy asked.
“I’m more than alright! I’m fan dabby dozy!” Pinkie chirped, rubbing her belly in delight.
“I’m more worried about Spike than myself.” Applejack admitted.
“Yeah...you could really see his distress...” Fluttershy replied. She took a napkin from the table and used it to wipe her face free from any mess.
“Rainbow’s reaction hardly helped...” The farmyard mare rolled her eyes and licked her mouth to clean it. Pinkie didn’t bother cleaning herself up all. Instead, she was happy to lie on her back and rub her tummy as she hummed a random tune.
“She just needs time to calm down, that’s all.” Fluttershy said, quickly going over to a trash can in order to dispose of the napkin. Upon returning, she smiled sweetly at Pinkie Pie. At least she was joyous. Though about what would probably remain a mystery.
“And then there’s Rarity...” Applejack trailed off.
“Everypony reacts differently to different things.” Pinkie commented, “Like when Cranky didn’t like my song.”
The earth pony turned her head to look at Pinkie. “But Pinkie...” She stammered, not wanting to burst her happy bubble, “That didn’t happen.”
“Of course it didn’t! Doesn’t mean I didn’t learn from it though! Duh!” Pinkie flailed her limbs about to stress her point.
The yellow Pegasus smiled in admiration of Pinkie’s words. “She’s right. That may not be real but those memories made an impact on our lives now. I wouldn’t live with my animal friends if things had turned out for me differently.” Fluttershy said.
“Hm, true. Besides: we’re here now. That’s what matters.” Applejack declared.
“Exactly!” Pinkie blurted out. Fluttershy only nodded in response.
“Who wants more cupcakes?!” Pinkie asked, raising herself up and grinning at her friends.
“Oh, I couldn’t possibly-“ Pinkie’s merry grin was enough to change Fluttershy’s mind, “Yes please.”
“Okay, one more.” Applejack chuckled.
Pinkie screamed, cheering and rushed into the kitchen like a bullet. The other two laughed at the party pony’s enthusiasm and began to talk to one another whilst Pinkie made another batch of the tasty treats. All previous worries about the truth were suddenly erased and replaced by an atmosphere of calm and fun. An atmosphere generated by friendship. It didn’t matter that Spike had made that wish. What truly mattered was that they were best friends forever.
I'm back on form. Hopefully.
The next chapter will have a focus on Rarity and why she reacted the way she did. Oh, and I haven't forgotten about Celestia!
Regardless, enjoy the chapter! My main writing will be done during weekends now, so expect updates then (if all goes to plan anyway )
Thanks for reading!
wait a minute here, wouldn't those events that everpony says didnt happen still have actually happened? Its just the memories of what spike and twilight were doing during those events that arent right. Or am i crazy?
Rainbow's reaction somewhat confuses me. Didn't she still do all those things in the real past as well? Spike's wish didn't change all of the things they did.
763031
Nothing before Spike made the wish actually happened. When the wish was made, the world changed to suit the wish's needs. Therefore it needed to implant everypony's head with memories of what would've happened had Twilight always been Spike's assistant.
Hopefully that makes sense.
763052
it does make sense, thanks for clearing that up for me. At least im not crazy.....i think
763057
No problem! It's my job to answer questions people have about the story!
New story idea: Luna and Discord switch lives
I somehow get the feeling Celestia is gonna make Spike suffer
I still don't get it. all those things happened. all things have still happened. Rainbow still made the sonic rainboom. Pinkie still cheered up cranky doodle. The only thing that must have happened to the others is that their memories has only been changed, not altered. the only change is that spike replaced Twilight.
isn't that right or am I lost.
I think the issue is that they don't know exactly how the wish worked, so they aren't trusting any of their memories at the moment. We know that regular timeline Dash also performed the Sonic Rainboom, but wish-timeline Dash doesn't.
763168
Indeed, the only major change is that Spike replaces Twilight's role. Therefore, the wish has to compensate for this. It can't rewind time and force those events to play out again really really quickly so instead it makes everypony have the memories of those events.
It's a bit like clones. A clone may have the same memories as its template but for the clone, those things never happened to him.
763298 Okay, I think I get it now, thanks. and still a great story. can't wait for more.
763221
Pretty much. As far as the wish-world mane6 are concerned, events in the old world could have played out very differently.
763168
Spike just didn't explain things well enough; he should have mentioned that all the fun times they had still happened, they just happened to Twilight instead of him.
I'm loving where all this is going. Keep going, excited to see the end.
(I do, however, dread seeing yet another fiction that has Spike completely friendzoned by Rarity.)
Plus, even if it actually got talked out, there's the distinct possibility that Dash has only done it twice, instead of three times, which would be more than enough to keep her angry.
763168
The events in the series still happened, but they didn't happen as they did in 'reality'. After Spike's wish, something basically went through their lives like an editor on a story, ripped out everything to do with their lives and rewrote it to suit things as if Spike was the older of the pair and he was taking care of Twilight.
So yes, Rainbow still made the sonic rainboom, Nightmare and Discord were defeated, Cranky was cheered up, Iron Will, Flim and Flam, Trixie and the rest showed up, but the events were changed. For instance, in one of the other chapters they talk about Nightmare Moon's defeat and in the 'new' version of reality, Spike flamed her with his dragon breath channeling the Elements of Harmony. No doubt some of the things that happened in the lead up were different, such as why he and Twi ended up being sent to Ponyville from their view point and what happened when they met the others - I can't really see Dash's Rainblow Dry having the same effect on Spike as on Twi so they were probably a bit different when they encountered Rarity, if they even encountered ponies in the same order or same way.
The other 'effect' of this happening is that some of the way the group encounters things would be different, for instance, Mare-Do-Well, Winter Wrap Up, and getting ready for the Gala. Spike in this reality probably doesn't organise quite the way Twilight would, and he wouldn't be affected the same way by things that they encountered. Likewise the fashion show would be a little different with Rarity making a suit in place of Twi's dress, not too many ways you can really change up male clothing - particularly fancy clothing - is often similar design all over, unlike the dresses which have a ton of variant designs.
763411 Okay, tanks. i get it now. thanks for the info.
Oh Pinkie your life motto is so incredibly fantastic. Problem have a cupcake, now it's better
Spike just can't win but at least Twi seems to understand the whole thing was an accident. I can't wait to see how this ends even if I don't want it to. Everything could go back to when he made the wish, he could be stuck in that world (though I doubt it), or they could remember everything! So many awesome possibilities!
Yeah... no.
763111 Now I want to write that xD
763547
I got a million of em
I hope things get better for Spike. All he wanted was a better life and to not be left alone. I really hope that when things return to normal, Twilight remembers the promise she made to Spike about not leaving him alone and realizes she broke it.
763509 I can't help but wonder what's wrong with this from your perspective.
I hope that Spike tells Twilight that all of hat DID happen, just replace Twilight with spike. Like rainbow made a sonic rain boom and all that stuff.mspoke needs a moustache to lift up his spirits
763111 Yes please.
763052
Basically the wish changed reality. The memories of the ponies were altered to fit the wish; Twi was replaced by Spike and vice versa. The events themselves happened, but any event involving Twi has been altered to use Spike instead. Am I right?
Wow....I haven't felt this much of a headache since i played Chain of Memories.
But i love the way this story is going.
763052
I love the story, but your thought that "Nothing before Spike made the wish actually happened." Has some rather large logical holes. If that was the case then the entire population would be getting headaches when trying to remember ANYTHING from before the wish, not just memories related to Spike.
It would also mean that the universe had been either 1. Destroyed, and a copy put in its place with the necessary changes. (Which would mean the past is unrecoverable, and a wish to fix things would only destroy the new universe and replace it with a copy again.) Or 2. A new reality was created in parallel with the old (which a fixer wish would then need to either destroy (negating the wish) or merge (resulting with the entire population having dual memories))
The only actual solution that I can see that matches with what has been written is for the wish to have simply traded their places at the point of the wish and changed key memories. After all, Spike and Twilight didn't change themselves, just their relative places.
[Edit]: modified to make less abrasive (I hope)
I am still puzzled by RD's logical jump from "Spike and Twilight swapped places" to "our entire pasts have been erased. Rarity and Applejack seemed to be asking about their past with Spike. I just don't get where RD got that idea...
Wow, this story's making me feel all weepy inside. I finally caught up to this chapter and I've been impressed the whole way through, although I would've expected them to be more skeptical when Spike told them the truth. Still, I love the emotion throughout this story and I'm looking forward to the next chapter.
I love it when Spike gets a little more character depth than he's usually handed. We need to see more of his relationship with Twilight!
And you've done a fantastic job of it.
763298
I still don't get it. I would understand if this entire world was probably a different world like it was a dream of some kind, like a certain Zelda game I know, then your whole clone idea for this setting would make sense for me. But from what I can tell all those events really did happen and like what some people are saying, it's just that Spike is there instead of Twilight in these events that shouldn't make them any less real nor all of their accomplishments will be render moot. Because if that was true then Nightmare Moon and Discord would still be running around. It makes me now wonder if you're going to use this side of the arguement in Rarity's chapter if she ever confronted Spike again.
764908
The same goes with me, it seems like she took "the memories are fake" quote as "your entire life was a lie" rather than just "well if instead of Twilight being there for you in your memories it was me." Now that I think about it that phrase is too vague.
763052
No... No it really doesn't. 764829 Explained it pretty much perfectly. They're basically acting like they're merely constructions that were created when Spike made this alternate universe, which simply isn't the case and doesn't follow with the context presented. Everything they remember did happen, just differently than they remembered it.
777961
this is how I imagine it.
http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/540189
I feel this is relevant.
Well, I'm all caught up now. I have to say, this is a very solid story. I'm looking forward to the next update with eager anticipation
I have to say that your writing has improved from the first chapter. It feels less forced in that you're no longer trying to use up every word in the thesaurus, and have gotten better about using the correct words in sentences. However, there are still a few things I'd like to talk about.
I hate to get nitpicky over something small, but this line made me stop and say "What?" no less than three times. I have to presume that you meant to say broom rather then broomstick, since a broomstick is simply a long, wooden pole. Not good for dusting at all. Secondly, one does not dust with a broom, one sweeps with it. One can dust with a featherduster, or a dustcloth, or even by setting up large fans and blowing the dust out. A broom (or broomstick) is right out for dusting. Sorry, but that one really bugged the heck out of me.
I... am having trouble finding the words to describe just how wrong this line is. To put it simply, these are not words Applejack would use in regards to one of her friends. Putting aside the shock and betrayal she must be feeling at the time, she would see that Twilight is as much a victim in this as she is. Twilight, who is a filly that might not understand what is going on, whose emotional maturity is even shakier than hers was at the same age, who would remind her of her own little sister if only because of her age; may have just had the same bombshell dropped on her that she has, and her reaction is "forget her, we got our own problems"? And then, the elements of KINDNESS and JOY agree with her?
Sorry, but you're asking me to suspend a lot of disbelief here. It would be a lot easier to believe that they just forgot about her since they aren't used to even thinking about her in the first place. The picnic chapter would be a good example of that. They know that a small filly is under Spike's care, but not once is she brought up during the picnic. It's easy to forget about her entirely since "out of sight, out of mind" comes into play with things (or ponies) you don't often deal with, but outright saying "never mind her, we got more important ponies to worry about, namely us" is just deplorable.
This story is a good premise, but the execution needs some work. There's a lot of minutia (especially in the first half of the story) that you could get rid of, or even condense down to smaller descriptions. We don't need to read that Spike went into the kitchen, got out a bowl, got out the cereal, got out the milk, poured the cereal, poured the milk, put the cereal away, put the milk away, and plopped a spoon into the bowl for Twilight spread across eight paragraphs (and why on Earth would he add the milk before she gets there? the cereal would get soggy!). All that could be condensed to a single paragraph of two or three sentences.
You've gotten better with the "show, don't tell" thing, but you may want to get a proofreader to go over your story. There are still a lot of misused words sprinkled throughout that a proofreader would catch (like the "broomstick" thing I mentioned earlier). I'm gonna fave this so I can track it, and hope that you continue to improve.
Keep going! We have to see more!
863374
Well first off, they know that Twilight is going after Rainbow Dash so they may have believed that she was going to be okay with her for a little bit and second off Twilight is part of the problem that they're dealing with right now. I'm pretty sure it's the same amount of reason when someone doesn't want to talk to their friend for a couple of minutes and think about things for a little bit without their friend's face and presence making things that much harder to understand the problem. They know that Twilight is a filly right now, but finding out that she was supposed to be their friend all along, especially the friend is supposed to be one who was there for them instead of Spike (since there are episodes where he doesn't even show up) is really nerve wrecking to them. Not to mention that since they were supposed to be friends all along I think they know that Twilight will be alright despite her current condition. Also, I think they belived that since most kids are always out by themselves in the day (say the CMC for example, most particularly Apple Bloom before the team was formed), it's also okay to leave her alone (with the supposed Rainbow Dash) for a little bit, but not in the same way that Spike did in his first day when he made his wish. Especially since the first thing they do when they're done figuring stuff out is to look for Twilight.
I think they accepted what happened a bit quickly, but worrying about the past seems legit.
I feel that too little people got the BGP reference here... Loving the story though!
Racist Rainbow Dash and Selfish Applejack? UM.
Logically we the readers know that the things the characters are saying about their situation are incorrect but imagine if you were told that your best friend was only so because he switched places with someone else because they made a wish about it. You'd probably be overwhelmed with "what the fuck" and not be thinking clearly, so the Idiot Ball is excused. But what I have a problem with is Rainbow holding the Jerkass ball. Why would she insult one of her best friends based on what species he was? For the element of loyalty that's pretty uncool. For... Any decent pony that's pretty uncool. And hella out of character. We know from canon that she loves dragons themselves, and only has a problem with rudeness and selfishness. So yeah, she'd be all about letting him know he's an asshole but blaming it on his dragonhood just rubs me the wrong way. I'm also a bit miffed that the plot is moving faster than the story but then again it's only halfway through right now so I know something else is gonna happen in return.