Bit by bit, Glamour awoke from her slumber, and her eyes opened. A lazy smile formed on her face when she was met with a most welcome sight.
Coco was right in front of her, still sleeping. Just like they had fallen asleep, they were still face to face, entwined in each other’s hooves. Coco had a small smile of her own, and Glamour was sure she heard her name escaping Coco’s lips at least once.
A quick glance at a clock told her that they had completely slept past the morning, and it was now in the middle of the afternoon. Considering everything that had happened, a bit of extra rest was well-deserved, and Glamour was glad that they were able to have a restful and blissful sleep.
She was also happy to note that many of her injuries had been reduced to dull aches and minor bouts of soreness. Even her injured foreleg felt better, and she raised her bandaged hoof to inspect it.
A loud series of knocks echoed throughout the apartment.
Glamour blinked, wondering who could be at the door. Tirek had rampaged across Manehattan less than twenty-four hours ago, and even though he was gone, she highly doubted that anypony would be running around yet. She was also pretty sure that villains don’t knock on doors either.
Not wanting to disturb the still sleeping Coco, Glamour carefully removed herself from Coco’s embrace and quietly slipped out of bed. She spent a few seconds in front of a mirror to fix her mane before proceeding to the door to their apartment.
Glamour looked through the front door’s peephole, to make sure there was not any danger on the other side, and she gasped at what she saw and immediately flung the door open.
“Grace! You’re safe!” Glamour happily cried out, taking note of Grace’s cutie mark and non-faded eyes.
“Sure am. Going to take more than some crazy monster to bring this mare down,” Grace replied with a smirk. She paused to look Glamour up and down. “Can’t say the same for you though. What did you do? Try to take that thing on in hoof to hoof combat?”
Glamour let out a nervous laugh. “Um, something like that…” She quickly cleared her throat. “So, how did you manage to avoid Tirek?”
“Tirek? Is that the name of whatever that thing was?”
Glamour nodded. “Yep. He’s a centaur that wants to drain the magic of everypony.”
“Sheesh, and I thought my ex was fat…”
“Uh, what?”
“Never mind,” Grace said with a dismissive wave. “So, to answer your question, I was still working when word got to us that Tirek was going around. Prim took charge and led all of us to, and you’re not going to believe this, an underground bunker!”
Glamour slowly blinked, and all she could respond with was “What?”
“She has this safe place deep under the building. I didn’t even know it even existed until then. And it was not some dingy concrete room. The place was huge! There must have been like fifty of us, and we all easily fit inside. Prim has got all sorts of neat stuff down there like a bar and a game room. She even had foosball! Shoot, I almost did not want to go when it was declared safe to leave.”
“What?” Glamour repeated, her eyes in a lost gaze.
“So yeah, I figured that I would come and check to see if you two are okay. Speaking of which, where’s Coco?”
“Oh, she’s doing… alright, I think. Unfortunately, she was drained by Tirek. Her cutie mark disappeared, but other than feeling really tired, she doesn’t seem to be in any danger. She’s still sleeping right now.”
Grace nodded in understanding. “That’s good. At least she’s not seriously hurt. So, um, listen, Glamour, you mind if I come in?”
“Of course.” Glamour nodded and stepped aside to let Grace in. After closing the door behind her, she joined her friend in the living room.
Grace threw herself onto the couch and reclined into a comfortable position. “So, I actually had another reason for coming here. I’m glad that Coco is asleep because I wanted to talk to you.”
“Oh? What about?” Glamour asked, taking a seat next to Grace.
“Well, even though I was safe in Prim’s bunker, this whole apocalypse thing got me thinking. Life is unpredictable. One day, you could be cleaning off some food stains you might have accidentally dripped on some important documents, and then suddenly, a big, angry monster decides to frolic around town. Feels like we get these end of the world scenarios like two or three times a year, so I’ve decided that you need to seize the moment when there’s something you want, because you never know what might happen later. That’s why I’m here now.”
Glamour’s eyes slowly widened as she felt a familiar force suddenly flow out of Grace.
“What I’m trying to say is,” Grace continued, not noticing the distressed look on Glamour’s face, “is that I’m pretty sure I’ve fallen in love with you.”
Glamour was doing a pretty good job of not losing her head, even though she was screaming internally, and her sense of fear was taking her overworked heart into a back alley and doing unspeakable horrors to it. “G-Grace, I’m flattered, but, uh, you do realize that Coco and I have a pretty good chance of getting back together, right?”
“Oh, I know that, and I really do hope you two get back together,” Grace replied without missing a beat.
“Then, uh, you’re just doing this to tell me your feelings?”
“Nope, I still want to be your marefriend.”
“B-but Coco…”
A devilish smirk splayed out across Grace’s face, and she leaned forward to whisper in Glamour’s ear. “Let me tell you what's a herd…”
Glamour heard somepony knock on the door again, and she immediately got up. “Oh look, somepony’s at the door! I need to get that and not because I need to get away from you!”
She rushed toward the door, and when she opened it, she gasped. “M-Miss Hemline?”
“Good afternoon, Miss Glamour,” Prim replied with her traditional stoneface. Like Grace, she paused to examine Glamour, and her face softened. “Oh dear, are you alright?”
Two questions battled it out in Glamour’s head, one speculating about what Prim was doing here, and the other wondering why Prim was showing concern for her. One eventually won out, thanks to an impressive dropkick, and Glamour asked, “I-I’m fine, Miss Hemline, but what are you doing here?”
“That is not the correct way to address the pony who employs you, Miss Glamour,” Prim remarked with a frown.
“S-sorry!” Glamour bowed and opened the door wide. “P-please come in, Miss Hemline!”
“That’s better,” Prim said with a nod of approval and walked inside. “Ah, I see that Grace is already here. I trust that she has told you everything?”
“Er, yeah, everything…” Glamour was sure that Prim was just talking about the bunker they hid in.
“Good, that saves us time. So, what shall we do first as a herd?”
Glamour blinked several times. She was barely able to process what she had just heard, as well as feeling the growing amount of love in the apartment. “What?!”
Prim’s eyebrow rose, and she turned to Grace. “Didn’t you tell her about us?”
“Well, almost everything,” Grace said with a shrug. “I just started talking about starting a herd when you came in.”
“Ah, my apologies for interrupting.”
“Hold on a minute!” Glamour cried out. “I can get why Grace might want to be my marefriend since we’ve been friends for some time, but why do you suddenly love me, Miss Hemline?”
“As I said before, I find your hard work and dedication admirable, Miss Glamour. In fact, I find those attributes really desirable. Of course, running a business does demand sacrifice, and I was forced to keep things professional between us. However, in light of recent events, I’ve decided life is too short to forsake love.”
Glamour facehoofed. “Okay, but are you seriously thinking of starting a herd with me, you, Coco, and Grace?”
“That is the plan. We have agreed that you are too precious to not be shared.” Prim grinned and trotted up to Glamour with half-lidded eyes. “Now, I do think we should do something to commemorate this occasion. Shall we head back to my office, or shall we just use your bedroom? I’m sure I can show you how I don’t hesitate to get down and dirty to get what I want.”
“Oooh, kinky,” Grace commented with a wide grin.
Glamour backed away from Prim, which was also the scariest sight she had ever seen. She much preferred an angry Prim instead of seductive Prim.
Yet another knock sounded at the door, offering salvation for Glamour, and she rushed toward it, only to stop right after unlocking it. Glancing back at Prim and Grace, she asked, “There wouldn’t happen to be anything else I should know about this herd thing, is there?”
“Well, about that…” Grace started.
The unlocked door suddenly flew open, almost smacking Glamour in the face.
“I, Photo Finish, have arrived!”
Glamour let out a loud groan and turned to her right so that she could repeatedly bash her head against the wall. Photo Finish was never a mare of subtlety, and Glamour could already sense why she was here.
Glamour hoped that by hitting her head hard enough, she would pass out and this nightmare would be over. Unfortunately, she was quickly pulled away by two strong hooves and wrapped in a tight hug.
“Oh, my shining star!” Photo Finish cheered, tightening her hug to the point Glamour was finding it hard to breathe. “I, Photo Finish, am so happy to see you! We have so much to discuss!”
“Let me guess, you want to start a herd with me, you, Coco, Prim, and Grace…” Glamour said in a monotone voice.
“That’s exactly right!” Photo Finish cheered loudly. “I, Photo Finish, just knew that you were the mare for me! You are such a wunderbar model with so much potential and talent! Let Photo Finish bask in that!”
Glamour grunted as she was roughly sat down, but her eyes widened with dread when Photo Finish’s face moved right in front of her. She desperately struggled to get out of Photo Finish’s iron grip when the eyebrows started waggling.
In a low voice, Photo Finish proclaimed, “It’s time for I, Photo Finish, and you to make ze magicks!”
“Nope! Nope! Nope!” Glamour protested, finally freeing herself from Photo Finish. She ran past Prim and Grace toward the balcony to shift into her changeling form. She was not sure if her wings were healed yet, so she would either fly to safety or go splat on the pavement below. Both options were preferable than staying with the horny mares.
Just as Glamour threw open the balcony door, she saw a giant rainbow cross the sky. “W-what is that?”
All she got in response from the other mares were shrugs and confused murmurs.
“Wait, is that a pony?” Grace asked, pointing at the sky.
Glamour followed Grace’s hoof and squinted. There was indeed a pony in the sky, but it was too far away to see who it was. However, the pony seemed to be flying toward them as it got bigger and bigger, and Glamour was able to eventually recognize who it was. “R-Rarity?”
Putting aside the fact that the unicorn was flying, Rarity had undergone some sort of transformation. Diamonds decorated her legs, but her most notable change was her hair. Both her mane and tail were still in their elegant coiffure, but they had grown to an almost absurd level, and streaks of teal, magenta, and yellow ran down their entire lengths.
“Hello, darlings, it’s so good to see all of you!” Rarity greeted with a bright smile as she landed on the balcony and walked into the room.
Glamour and the rest of her herd wannabes all just stared at her in silence.
“What? Did I come at a bad time?” Rarity asked. She cocked her head, and her mane dragged along the floor.
“So, uh, Rarity, you look different since the last time we saw you at the Crystal Empire,” Grace remarked. She paused for a few seconds, eyeing Rarity’s mane and tail. “What’s with the hair extensions?”
“Hair… extensions?” Rarity made several gasps of surprise and indignation. “For your information, Grace, I do not use hair extensions! While I do think this new style is a bit over the top, I do admit it has grown on me, no pun intended.”
“W-what are you doing here, Rarity?” Glamour asking the same question several mares before her had to answer.
“Well, my friends and I had just done away with that nasty Tirek, and we’re now going around to restore all the ponies he affected. This little change I went through is something that helped us win.”
“So you mean you’re here to help Coco?” Glamour asked, her hopes rising. It was the first good and sane news that she heard today. “Tirek got her, but she’s sleeping in her room now.”
“Oh, don’t worry about her. I don’t have to do a thing actually. She should already be feeling better. Giant rainbows do help save a lot of work. I actually wanted to check up on you.”
Warning buzzers were set off in Glamour’s head, but she reassured herself that Rarity, one of the paragons of Equestria, was not going to be like the other mares in the room ogling her flanks.
“Um, I’m fine, Rarity. Thanks for the concern. I did take a beating from Tirek, but a few days of rest should be all that I need.”
“Good, good, because I would absolutely love to invite you back to Ponyville. You see, I have grown quite fond of you, despite some of the awkwardness that emerged during the Equestria Games. How you stuck by Coco’s side is so romantic, and I was hoping I could convince you and Coco to broaden your horizons and your relationship.”
Glamour’s groan could be heard from the streets. “Not you too!”
“Whatever do you mean, darling?”
“Oh, you like Glamour too?” Grace asked “Want to join the herd we formed with her?”
“Why that sounds marvelous! I would be delighted to! The more, the merrier!”
“What is wrong with you all?!” Glamour shouted.
A thumping sound made everypony turn to the door where a rolled up red carpet bounced into the room and unraveled. When the carpet reached its end, Discord popped out of it with a huge bouquet of polkadotted roses.
Glamour glanced down at the flowers and then up at Discord’s grinning face with an unamused glare. “Discord… please don’t tell me—”
“Oh my dear, Glamour!” Discord bellowed in a deep, dramatic voice. “I am so sorry for all the trouble I caused you! For you see, when I first laid eyes on you, figuratively speaking of course since Fluttershy chastised me the last time I literally did that to a pony, I was smitten! I could not stop thinking about you! When I stopped you yesterday, it was me merely unable to express my chaotic feelings for you, but now, I have seen the error of my ways!”
Discord thrust the flowers into Glamour’s hooves. “Please, forgive me, and I shall be your knight in shining armor and carry you off to the sunset!” He snapped his fingers and was suddenly outfitted in a full set of armor and riding on a stick with a toy horse’s head on top of it and a license plate on its back with the words “Just Did It”.
“No, get out,” Glamour replied with a bored look and tossed the flowers over her shoulder.
Discord’s armor crumbled into dust as he clutched his chest with both claws. “Oh, cruel world! How you wound me, dear maiden.”
“Now, now, Discord,” Rarity said, patting his side. “That was a lovely gesture, and I’m sure that Glamour will forgive you over time. In the meantime, why don’t you join the herd we’re forming with her? I’m sure having a male… or whatever you are… would help spice things up.”
Discord’s eyebrow rose and did a little dance. “You don’t say? A herd with so many mares? That sounds like a chaotic disaster.” A bright smile immediately lit up on Discord’s face that almost blinded Glamour. “I love it.”
The sound of somepony clearing their throat made everypony’s head turn to find Coco standing in front of her room with a frown.
“Coco, you’re alright!” Glamour cheered, seeing Coco’s cutie mark and eyes had returned to normal.
“What is this I’m hearing about all of you trying to form a herd with my marefriend?” Coco asked with a threatening tone.
“You heard right, Miss Pommel,” Prim replied. “Glamour is such a wonderful mare that we’ve all fallen in love with her. Instead of having to torment her with the impossible choice of choosing one of us, we decided it would be better if all of us share her.”
“I’m being plenty tormented now!” Glamour cried out.
“Glamour is my marefriend, and we are not looking to add anypony to our relationship. Now, everypony, if you would all kindly leave me and Glamour alone, it would be much appreciated. Otherwise…” Coco’s eyes narrowed, and a chilling, guttural growl escaped her. “I’ll make you leave…”
“Now, now, Coco, there’s no need to resort to any violence,” Rarity said in a chastising tone. “I’m sure we can work something out. It wouldn’t be very generous of you if you kept such a lovely mare all to yourself.”
Glamour’s protests was drowned out by everypony else’s voices of approval.
Coco closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “Alright then, I suppose we can have a little discussion. Just let me grab something really quick to help my argument.”
“W-what? Coco?” Glamour whimpered as Coco disappeared into her room.
“That’s very noble of you, darling. I do think you’re going to be happy… with…” Rarity trailed off as Coco came back into the room. “Er, what is that, Coco?”
“My argument,” Coco growled with a giant mallet that was bigger than her in her teeth.
Rarity chuckled, but there was a hint of nervousness in it. “N-now, now, darling, surely you jest. That thing is too big for you. Now put that down before—”
Coco suddenly swung the mallet with blinding speed, and with a loud boom, half the living room wall was demolished.
Six loud clangs were heard shortly afterwards when six jaws hit the floor.
“Run for the hills!” Discord shouted, and all of Glamour’s suitors scrambled out of the apartment.
“COCO, SMASH!” Coco roared before running out the door, wildly swinging her hammer.
“My balls! She shattered my balls!” Discord’s yells rang through the air. “I was saving those crystals balls!”
Glamour blinked several times, not knowing what she should do. On the one hoof, she was glad that Coco loved her enough to swing a big, scary mallet to defend her. On the other hoof, Coco knew how to swing a big, scary mallet.
Glamour did not want to make Coco mad.
With a sigh, Glamour decided to wait for Coco to come back. She trotted back to Coco’s room and plopped herself onto the bed. At least nothing bad could happen in bed. She could trust the bed.
Glamour’s eyes shot open when she heard a rustling under her. Slowly, she turned to peek over the side of the bed to find a bit of a pink mane popping out from under it. Her blood ran cold as the pink mane started sliding out, revealing Pinkie with an even poofier mane than before with teal, orange, and yellow streaks going through its middle.
“Hi there, Glammy. Time for a little party for two,” Pinkie greeted with a naughty grin. In her hoof was a cake with a crude picture drawn with frosting of the two of them in an even cruder position.
Glamour sighed and buried her head into a pillow.
“Confound these ponies…”
Sigh. *glares at author* Flipping April Fool's Day BS...
From this moment I understood that this was a prank.
I was confused. Then alarmed. And now I am grinning like a loon.
I'm really starting to have a love hate relationship with April 2nd.
Yes. April 2nd, not April 1st. I live in Australia. The rest of you are all a day late to the party. All these April fools jokes don't start showing up online until we all go to sleep.
31.media.tumblr.com/09ca2da4c803d0bc89252adb7a13439c/tumblr_inline_o3e2rr0Px41tw1h7t_500.gif
I hate you so much
Aprils fool, the day of douchebaggery
fortheloveof- Can I get *ONE* Chapter today that isn't a joke!?
...What did i just read?
First there's the Iron Horse update.
Then this.
Then Snoopavision.
Then google-ifying 4chan.
The Derpibooru watermarks and premium.
orig05.deviantart.net/abfb/f/2012/353/6/a/i_am_so_done__by_catlover445-d5oj4lv.png
I am so fucking done.
At first I thought "dream sequence." Then the story just kept on going. And going. Then halfway through or so I remembered it's April Fool's Day. Well played.
... You are just playing... right?
7085407
Grace seemed really unlikely, but I wasn't absolutely sure until Prim. Of course, it just snowballed from there.
7085416 I'm with this guy.
7085495 and this guy
Well it was all done in the name of a good laugh at least.
Hilarious. "What a TWIST!"
I was expecting her to wake up and find that it was all a dream, up until I remembered that it was April 1st and the whole chapter was likely to be considered non canon.
7085567
see, mom? I'm an agreeable guy!
*sigh* I was excited about an update and then I was depressed. I hate April Fools day.
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LIKE,
CAN YOU NOT?
"Yes."
WILL YOU NOT?
"No."
lol
I figured this was a April Fool's joke when I saw the new chapter. It came way too soon,
7085567 *girl
April Fool's Day is pretty much the worst day of the year on this site. Everyone thinks that it's funny to post fake chapters, this is the third one I've read today. Not cool.
*snickers* Hope you keep this online, for posterity =D
I'm glad there was also proper chapter, though. Or else I would have been disappointed, like "Yay new chapter!!" and then"Damn, it's just a prank. *sob*"
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I dunno about that , but I heard that a catapult is pretty easy to build , just ask the CMC.
I also heard some people around here are rocking some pretty cool headcannon , so maybe you should ask one of them.
...oh , and make sure the building at which you fire youself isn't the one where your beloved lives , it might hinder the process.
The admins need to make a special chapter marker for April Fools chapters.
at first i thought it was a dream. Until i realised that some parts of the planet still in april fools xD
Oh god, that was hilarious.
I would give you another like for the laughs you have given me, but with only one account that is out of the question...
wtf just happened?
7085896 Agreed uuuuug still made me laugh when I remembered it's April 1st ( I remember but for some reason I thought this story wouldn't be making a joke on April 1st )
I hate this day. I hate it. I absolutely despise April 1st. It's a day dedicated to the very worst jokes people can come up with.
Okay, I'll admit, I could buy Grace. Maybe. The rest? yeah, that was silly as hell, and I giggled like a mad thing.
... also 'Coco smash' needs to be a ringtone or something.
7085407 You are more worldly than I then. Took me until Prim.
7085896 Pretty sure that would ruin the fooling of the chapter then. I'm sure it will be properly sorted out of the loop like the other noncanon tidbit.
7085407 To be honest I was a bit wary because of the relatively quick turnaround, and then we hit the line about the bunker and I knew. Though considering the injuries, and stress, it could have been a fever dream.
This is the best ending
The entire way through, I kept thinking, this has to be a dream sequence, then I started reading the comments....
i love it
7086469 You know the grace I'll by but as soon as Prim came up I was like.
Oh great an April fool's chapter.
i hate the fact that i believed this till rarity showed up but still good job thumbs up and all that stuff you got me.
Please keep this chapter up, Kevinltk. Best April Fools nightmare ever.
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7085712
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I'm keeping it in. Now that April Fool's is over, it's been marked as an alternate chapter.
Awesome! Best April Fools chapter on my list. Great job on your grammer too.
Nice April fools joke.
These pony's drive me to drink.
Okay, that was AMAZING!! I thought this was a legit ending. Great joke! <3
Like many others here, I thought you were being serious until Prim asked Glamour. By the way, is the next real chapter going to be the ending?
7086196 April Fools chapter, just move along, nothing of importance to see here.
7091617 haha lol ok :3
First I thought it was Discord playing a prank...
Then I thought another hive of changelings had taken their places...
Then I realized what day this was posted on...
*CLAP CLAP*
Well done...
You...got me good there. The thing with grace I was thinking maybe. But then I was more and more like wtf when the others showed up. Especially Prim. Well played.
Still one thing I hate about april the first....