Party of None

This story has been marked as having adult content. Please click below to confirm you are of legal age to view adult material in your country.

Confirm

Comments ( 9 )

Viewing 1 - 50 of 9
- Newest First
- Oldest First

Sorren

Sorren #1 · May 25th, 2012 · · · The Cutie Pox Killing ·

I cannot explain this in words. So let me do so with many different video clips.

Try yo play them all at the same time to get the full effect.

[youtube=U6RWiVRwoE8] [youtube=4yfr_Zj1iU4]

[youtube=yg2u_De8j5o] [youtube=vzrDpj6M1ig]

Oh, but yes. It was written well.

Sleipnir

Sleipnir #2 · May 25th, 2012 · · · The Cutie Pox Killing ·

Hmm... Tracking for gore. This better be good.

Pascal

Pascal #3 · May 25th, 2012 · · · The Cutie Pox Killing ·

Here's the problems with gorefics: It's all been done before.

Stabbing, amputation, mutilation, electrocution, force feeding one's own body parts, force feeding others' body parts, starvation, incineration, rape, and castration, just to name a few, have been used in a multitude of fics. The next chapters are going to need to be EXTREMELY creative if the story is going to have any impact. I don't think I've seen cutie pox used in this way before, which is a good sign.

Also, I think this could have had a bit more buildup.

It's just like:

"Wheeeee! I'm happy!" "Yay, we're happy too!"

"Wheeeee! I'm evil now!" "Oh no! You are killing us!"

I think a slower introduction would have been better, so that the reader gets a sense of dread and anticipation.

Keep writing!

Oh, and one more thing. Using Pinkie for a gorefic is risky, because no matter how good it is, everyone's going to be thinking "Cupcakes!"

Rauzar

Rauzar #4 · May 25th, 2012 · · · The Cutie Pox Killing ·

I am loving this just as much as i loved cupcakes, smiled the whole way through! When will we get some rape and tearlicking? Please?

Rauzar

Rauzar #5 · May 25th, 2012 · · · The Cutie Pox Killing ·

All this needs is rape and othrr creative ways to kill everypony! Maybe make them kill each other or maybe eat eachother? I am tracking and liking this, smiled the whole way through!

Pascal

Pascal #6 · May 25th, 2012 · · · The Cutie Pox Killing ·

644028

The use of the Cutie Pox certainly does give Caberea a lot of options for creative things to do. I just hope it doesn't end up like Sweet Apple Massacre. I thought they died too quickly in that one for it to be effective.

Rauzar