If I hadn't...
Should I have...?
Would It be the same if I...?
Oh who cares!
(Note: Sex Tag is for suggestive content and future chapters. this is what most call: a 'Harem' fiction, if you do not like literary content of this kind, please do not come and be rude. Constructive Critisizm is always appreciated. Thanks!)
What I liked: Fire
What I disliked: the writing was kinda awkward, and the capitalization seems random. Some words that shouldn't be capitalized are capitalized, and ones that are supposed to be aren't.
i htae ur proose. thats my only chrisicism.
Thanks for the Criticizim, (totally in a good way) I really appreciate it,
I say this truthfully, Im a completely new fanfiction writer, and i dont exactly know the ropes and ties of writing. I really Appreciate the help though, itll make for BETTER CHAPTERS!
KO hope your continue this story cause I'm sure am liking it.
6105692 KO when's the next chapter coming I'm dying to see some action and love making.
6105692 KO hope the next chapter is almost done cause I hope to see more action.
6105692 KO please say the next chapter is coming soon.
6105692 KO PLEASE SAY THE NEXT CHAPTER IS COMING SOON.