Humans in Ponyville, Chapter 2
At the mayor’s suggestion, everyone moved to a large conference room to go over the project that would take place over the next week. Jerry had agreed without realizing that the mayor, who was inexplicably named Mayor Mare, would want to go over every detail with a fine-toothed comb.
Two hours of tedious discussion later found him balancing awkwardly on his pony-proportioned chair with his legs and lower back cramping up. It caused Jerry to have flashbacks of his daughters’ parent-teacher conferences back when they were still in elementary school.
The clock was ticking its way towards noon when the meeting finally began wrapping up. Or so it seemed, as the mayor decided that a quick summary was in order.
“So, we’re agreed,” she said as she scanned the scroll of notes on the table in front of her. “In addition to outfitting the house at 847 Garden Terrace Road with human technology, you’ll also be adding these ‘access points’ at optimal places around town. Residents and business owners will be asked to volunteer their premises for use, to be paid out of funds provided by the Immigration Committee out of Canterlot. If the resident-slash-owner refuses to have this equipment installed, you will move to the next-most-optimal location and ask that resident.”
“That’s right,” Jerry said, nodding. He wondered vaguely where the nearest bathroom was.
“Debris removal will be handled by the rental of a large dumpster from Landfill’s Waste Removal services, so as not to leave any hazardous material lying around.”
“Of course. When will the dumpster be delivered?” Jerry asked.
“I’ll send a runner out right after the meeting,” the mayor said. “It shouldn’t be longer than an hour or two.” She consulted her notes once again, finally reaching the one thing Jerry was the most concerned about. “Also, you agree to bring Mister Radio Wave along with you, so that he may be our resident expert in the maintenance of this equipment.”
The pony in question was a charcoal-grey unicorn stallion. His light red mane and tail were both trimmed short, and he was wearing nothing but a toolbelt and a wide smile. His cutie mark, appropriately enough, looked like an old-school radio tower, complete with what looked like lightning bolts zapping out of it.
“Absolutely,” Jerry replied with more confidence than he felt. “Having someone around who can troubleshoot problems makes sense. My only concern is that we’ll be hooking into the Ponyville electrical grid. I don’t want our equipment to be responsible for anyone getting electrocuted.”
“Not a problem, bud,” Radio Wave said, his voice chipper and his eyes shining. “I may be big in the world of radio, but I’m also a certified electrician.”
Jerry grinned. That was the best news he’d heard all morning. “Right. That’s no problem, then. I’ll have you shadow the teams as they set up the access points, and we can go over the modifications I’ll be making to Sunflower’s home once the tiles are done. I’ll even leave behind a copy of our tech manuals, for reference.”
“That sounds like a plan to me!”
“Well, I think that’s about it,” the mayor said, glancing at the clock on the wall just as the clock ticked past noon. “If there’s anything else you need, feel free to let us know.”
“Thanks, I’ll keep that in mind.” Jerry’s stomach rumbled and he chuckled. “I think now would be a great time to break for lunch. Breakfast was a while ago for us.”
“Well, we have plenty of fine restaurants here in Ponyville,” the Mayor said. “I’m sure you’ll find something you’ll enjoy!”
“What about that big gingerbread house thing?” asked Tom Carsten, the lead tech on the solar tile project. “I gotta admit, I’m curious about the place. Was that a restaurant?”
“Ah, yes! That would be Sugarcube Corner. They’re a bakery, but they also sell hot drinks such as tea and coffee.”
The mention of coffee got more than a few of the humans perking up in their undersized chairs.
“Do other places serve coffee?” Tandy asked. “I’m thinking I might like something other than bakery stuff.”
“Oh, yes.” The Mayor nodded sagely. “Most of our local cafes and restaurants will serve it. Simply refer to your ‘Welcome to Ponyville’ packets for the locations, as well as some coupons!”
“Alright, team,” Jerry said, finally standing up out of that godawful, tiny chair. “Let’s break for lunch. We’ll meet back at Sunflower’s place in one hour. Remember to conduct yourselves respectfully!” He turned back to the mayor, her aides, and Radio Wave, who were all getting up as well. “Mayor, it’s been a genuine pleasure.”
“Likewise.” The Mayor smiled and held out her hoof, which Jerry shook gently. It still amazed him how warm a pony’s hooves could be.
The rest of the humans got up out of their chairs, many of them groaning and stretching out the muscles that had kinked up during the meeting. A round of farewells followed, and the various members of the teams went their separate ways.
~~*~~
The food at the Hay Bale had been savory, and the service had been exceptional, even though they had caught the waitress staring at them from time to time. Unfortunately, the pony-sized portions weren’t enough for Jerry, Tom and Michelle, who were wandering around town looking for an after-lunch snack.
It was then that Tom had once again mentioned his interest in trying out the ridiculously pink bakery named Sugarcube Corner.
“Oh, man, that smells amazing,” Jerry said as they approached what looked like a giant gingerbread house.
“It sure does,” Michelle Baranski replied. She closed her eyes and sniffed the air with a blissful smile on her round face. “I love the smell of fresh bread!”
“The mayor said they have soup, right?” Tom asked. He was wringing his hands and eying the building with trepidation.
“Yeah, she did,” Jerry replied as he opened the door and walked through.
The interior of the shop was cozy, to say the least. There were a few tables in the main area, with only a couple of them occupied. A short line of ponies stood before the front counter. The counter itself had a glass front, displaying a mouth-watering assortment of cakes, pies and pastries.
“Hey, isn’t that Pink Pie, or whatever her name was?” Tom asked, pointing at the mare behind the counter.
“Pinkie Pie,” Michelle corrected. “And, yeah, it is.”
The pony behind the counter was familiar to Jerry as one of the six that had blasted the Black Tide with whatever that rainbow thing was. Her working behind a counter would have been enough to shock him all by itself. But what really shook him was that she suddenly broke into a song that, as the father of two Disney-obsessed daughters, he recognized instantly. She’d changed the words, but the tune itself had been burned into his brain over the course of several years when his daughters were pre-teens.
“Would you like to buy a cupcake?” the pink pony sang to the nonplussed unicorn mare at the front of the line. “Perhaps a slice of cake or two? The Cakes were on the baking floor, since half-past four, baking just for you!”
The whole time she was singing, the pink pony was also spinning around and sliding various items into small, white cardboard boxes. She then put the boxes into a large brown paper bag.
“Oh, god, no,” Jerry whispered, and Tom groaned his agreement.
Michelle let out a subdued squeal and clasped her hands together in front of her. “Ooh, I love this song!”
“You could also get a cookie, or an eclair, or even a great big pie!” Pinkie sang as she passed the large bag over to the pony in line. “So, would you like to buy a cupcake? It doesn’t have to be a cupcake…”
“Uh, no thanks, Pinkie,” the mare said as she took the bag with her magic. “Just this will be fine.”
Pinkie sighed dramatically, but her smile never faltered. “Okay, bye…”
“What sick puppy would introduce the Frozen soundtrack to these poor ponies?” Jerry muttered, which earned him a smack in the arm from Michelle.
“Hey, that was a good movie,” she said. “And the songs were great!”
Tom snickered. “I bet you drove your parents crazy singing them, too.”
“No comment.”
The line moved forward a little bit. Pinkie was serving another pony and had switched to a different song by this point, this one sounding suspiciously like something out of the Lion King soundtrack, albeit with different lyrics.
“Here you go, Thunderlane!” Pinkie said as she popped back up from behind the counter and passed over a white paper bag with the items the pegasus had ordered. “Give all my best to Blossomforth!”
“Thanks, Pinkie!” Thunderlane said before picking up his bag with his teeth and trotting away. He froze for a moment to stare at the three humans in line before visibly shaking himself and moving on.
Pinkie had continued on to the next pony in line, a purple mare who was frowning at the display case and humming to herself.
“What would you like, Cheerilee?” Pinkie asked.
“I’m not sure. What’s good, today?”
Pinkie gasped, bringing both forehooves up to her mouth.
“Oh, my,” Cheerilee said, smiling. “You’ve just thought of another song, didn’t you?”
Pinkie grinned and nodded before taking a deep breath. “Everything is awesome!” she sang while doing a cartwheel behind the counter. “Everything is good here, that you can see. Everything is awesome, in this bakery!”
Cheerilee snickered into her hoof, then pointed at the display case. “I’ll have an apple-cinnamon muffin, please.”
“You got it!” Pinkie chirped, quickly bagging the muffin and passing it over. “One muffin for my favorite school teacher!”
Bits were exchanged, and Cheerilee put the bag in her saddlebag. She turned, jumping slightly at the small group of humans behind her. “Oh, goodness!” she said. “You startled me!”
“Terribly sorry, ma’am.”
“Oh, no, it’s quite alright,” she said. “It’s just that you’re so much taller than I would have expected.”
Jerry, who was a few inches shy of six feet tall, chuckled. “Well, we still didn’t mean to startle you.”
“No harm done. Have a wonderful day!”
“You, too,” Jerry said, giving a little wave to the mare as she trotted out the front door. He turned forward and let out a startled squawk. Pinkie Pie was standing on the counter, her face just inches from his. The grin on her face couldn’t have been any wider.
“You’re my first human customers!” Pinkie squealed happily. “Well, unless you count Sunflower, of course. But I thought she was a pony for the longest time!”
“I’m very glad to meet you,” Jerry said. “Was it Miss Sunflower who introduced you to all those Disney songs?”
“And the Lego Movie,” Tom added.
“Yupperoonie!” Pinkie said with an infectious smile. “They’re pretty catchy, and I love singing! So, what can I get for you?”
Jerry’s stomach growled, offering up a reminder of why he was here. As much as he wanted to talk more with one of the six mares who’d saved the Earth, their protocol was clear: No interference with their day-to-day lives, outside of whatever was required by the project.
Jerry ordered a bear claw, Michelle asked for lemon shortbread, and Tom got himself a gigantic apple muffin. All three of them also asked for coffee.
“You got it!” Pinkie said after collecting their bits. Then she whirled off, dancing behind the counter as she gathered the items together. She slid a tray across the counter, which held all of the items they ordered.
The smell of fresh coffee hit Jerry’s nose. The Hay Bale had coffee, but it hadn’t smelled nearly as good as this.
“Cream and sugar are on the tables,” Pinkie said. “If you need anything else, please let me know!”
“Uh, I just had a question,” Tom said. “Do you sing lots of human songs?”
Pinkie blinked at him. Then she giggle-snorted. “Only recently! I mostly sing songs I make up myself.” She reared up and placed her forehooves on the counter, leaning towards the three humans with a conspirational look in her eye. “I’m working on a new one, but it’s not quite ready,” she stage-whispered.
“Well, we’d like to hear it when it’s ready, but we should really let you get back to work,” Jerry said, giving Tom a warning look.
“Oh, you’ll definitely hear it,” Pinkie said with a grin and a wink. “Oh, and you’re all coming back at seven tonight, right?”
“We are?” Jerry looked at the other two humans, who seemed just as confused as he was.
“Yeah, for your ‘Welcome to Ponyville’ party!” Pinkie's grin widened. “I throw one for everyone who’s new to town.” She sighed, adding, “Though, it’s getting kind of rough, what with all the new folks who are moving into town these days. That’s why I made a portable welcome wagon for individual welcome parties!”
Pinkie dropped back to the floor and picked up the pencil with her mouth once again. She began drawing on her order tablet with a look of intense concentration on her face. The three humans stepped away and left her to her work.
“Well, she’s certainly unique,” Jerry said as the three of them sat down around a small table.
“Sure is,” Tom said.
Michelle was grinning like a kid in a candy store. “I like her,” she said. “She’s fun!”
Jerry nodded his agreement, and then took a bite out of his bear claw. At the first taste, his whole face locked up, eyes wide and staring.
“Uh, you okay, boss?” Tom asked, casting a suspicious glance at the muffin he’d ordered.
“Oh, god,” Jerry said, his voice faint and awed. “I’ve died and gone to heaven…”
~~*~~
Lucas Vasquez rolled his eyes as Tom continued on with his story about meeting one of the Elements of Harmony in a local bakery. It wasn't that he didn’t believe him, it was just that he hadn’t shut up about it for the last half hour.
Working on a thatch roof was hard enough without having to hold a conversation at the same time. It made for uncertain footing at first, until they got enough of an area cleared to be able to stand easily. At least Sunflower’s new house had nice, solid decking under the thatch, which was more than many homeowners could claim.
It didn’t help that his coworkers, Rob and Tony, were asking all sorts of stupid questions down on the ground, apparently happy to let Lucas tear up the thatch and drop it over the edge. He heard them all chattering below, and it was enough to get him more than a little irritated. If it weren't for the fact that Tom was in charge of the roofing team, he might have even said something. As it was, he’d just have to have a quiet word with Jerry later tonight.
“Hey, how’s it going?”
Lucas jumped in surprise, nearly losing his footing. That voice had come from behind him. He turned and spotted the source, instantly recognizing the pegasus who was standing on the roof.
“Heh, sorry. Didn't mean to startle you,” Rainbow Dash said. “I just came down to see how you’re doing.”
“I, uh…” Lucas managed to kick his brain in motion. His grandmother never would have forgiven him if he weren't polite to a young lady, no matter what she looked like. “Doing just fine, Miss Dash, thank you.”
“Oh, good. It’s just that… uh.” Rainbow turned to look at him, her eyes narrowing in confusion. “You know me?”
Lucas almost laughed at that. “Most humans do. Rainbow Dash, bearer of the Element of Loyalty, fastest flyer in Equestria.” He smirked at the look of growing confusion on her face. “You only saved our planet, remember?”
Rainbow Dash blinked a few times before breaking out into a grin. “Oh! Yeah, well…” She put on a cocky grin and an air of aloofness. “I've saved the world so many times, it’s kinda hard to keep track of them all.”
Lucas laughed, and Rainbow’s grin widened.
“Anyway, I just wanted to see if the breeze is comfortable or not,” the pegasus said.
“Comfortable? Yeah, I guess so.”
“It’s just that you took off your shirt,” Rainbow continued. Lucas had a moment of panic over that, suddenly unable to remember if going bare-chested were taboo for ponies before remembering that they didn’t usually wear clothes. Rainbow continued, unaware of his momentary alarm. “If you’re too hot, I can ask the weather team to increase the airflow, or maybe cool it down a little.”
There was a considerable difference between being told that pegasi could control the weather, and having an actual pegasus casually offering to change it for you, Lucas realized. His shiver had very little to do with the breeze.
“Well, I wouldn't want you to go through any trouble,” he said.
“Nah, it’s no trouble,” Rainbow Dash replied, waving a hoof in what looked like a dismissive gesture. “You’re working on my friend’s house, so anything I can do to make it easier, I’ll do.”
“Honestly, the breeze is fine.” Lucas grinned, a thought occurring to him. “Though, if you wanted to do me a favor?”
Rainbow Dash arched an eyebrow at him. “Depends on the favor,” she said with equal parts humor and caution.
“My coworkers down there have been going on and on about meeting Pinkie Pie, instead of working,” Lucas said. “I was wondering if—”
“They what?”
Lucas’ heart caught in his throat as Rainbow Dash leapt up off of the roof, every instinct telling him that she’d fall and hurt herself. Instead, she zipped over to the edge of the roof and hovered there, wings beating lazily as she glared down at the three humans who were still chattering away below.
“Hey!” Rainbow barked, silencing the three of them. “Ain't you guys supposed to be working? This house isn't going to fix itself up, you know!” She dipped below the roof, still scolding.
Lucas peeked over the edge of the roof to see three shamefaced men being scolded by a tiny technicolor pony. He’d wanted her to go get Jerry, who was out with the WiFi team at the moment, but this was even better.
A few seconds later, Tom’s head popped up over the side of the roof like a sunrise with male pattern baldness. The other two scrambled up the ladder after him, with Rainbow hovering alongside and giving them an earful. All three of them tucked into the thatch with a will.
“That’s better,” Rainbow said. She was hovering above the roof, looking down at the humans with her forelegs crossed over her chest. “Don’t let me catch you slacking again!” Her scowl vanished, replaced by a grin. “It was nice talking to you, Lucas. Remember, if there’s anything I can do to make this easier, let me know.”
“Thanks, Rainbow Dash!” Lucas said, waving as the pegasus shot off into the sky.
Now that was a story he could tell his grandma.
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Wow! More fun reading! Yes!
Cool, I like side stories
I hate to do this cause it's not related to the side stories above, but i just wanted to say how much I love Project: Sunflower. It's one of the best HIE/ Transformation story I've ever read. ( The best HIE story I've ever read is "A Dream That Wasn't. Shameless advertising
)
Thank you so much for making these stories and I hope the quality stays up like it always has!
at
Ponies seem like pretty heavy eaters in the show, even if you don't count Pinkie Pie
Erin is my first guess
yup
Ha ha, Rainbow at her best.
One does wonder if Erin could ever get a double dozen doughnuts to go when she visits earth again.........and what she may do with pastries of mass destruction at review time.....
I very much enjoyed this. Keep up the good work.
Rainbow Dash, the hypocrite. XDDD
Forgetting the 'to' in between.
Likewise with 'them' here.
Exactly. The ponies should be listening to real songs, such as this, and this, and especially this masterpiece of the auditory arts.
Faith in pony musical tastes restored.
You mean 'on'?
I loved Rainbow Dash in this story.
6042038
6041534
There were truly an embarrassing number of typos that slipped through this time*. Thanks for the catches!
*I feel that I should point out that it's entirely my fault those were missed, and not my editors. I made some changes before I published that they didn't have a chance to review.
Not sure how this is going to come across, but I'm looking forward to you building on this a lot more than Harmony. Your worldbuilding and slice of life work has always been the draw for me. I hope to see more to come!
6042388 I've always preferred the Sunflower-saves-the-multiverse-by-being-cute part, but it looks like we're both going to get what we want.
Dash is best hippocrite.
Get it? Hippocrite? Like ponies?
… I'll show myself out.
Awesome!, can't wait to read!
6042388
Yeah, I pretty much feel the same way. Harmony is great and all, but this story is like a breeze of fresh air. It's always fun to watch new cultures interacting for the first time and I can hardly wait to get more of it. And if pegasus stuff surprises these guys, just imagine how they are going to feel about much of the craziness Twilight does on daily basis. And having to install pannels on her hollowed-out, yet living tree.
And I bet that pony 'researcher' team from the first chapter will get to interact with the human team at some point not too far off ...
Man, this definitely has me more excited for more than Harmony at the moment!
6042919
I wonder if Tirek exists in this continuity? Well, they been going about "reforming" Discord lately...
like 100! This story is awesome! ^^
A new chapter of Harmony yesterday, and then this today? It's like Christmas and my birthday were on the same day!
Awesome... That is all.
For the colonization of zebra territory, some scientists might wonder if en-utero exposure to Equestria’s magical field will cause humans born in Equestria to be passively part of the magical field (like donkeys and mules).
If one of the humans in Ponyville got pregnant, the program director might ask her to gestate and birth the child in Equestria to see if future humans living in zebra territory will have extra difficulties. While it might not seem fair to put so much pressure on her, its better they find out now under controlled circumstances rather than waiting until colonists show up.
For the wounded soldier being transformed into a human-unicorn hybrid using Lyra as a template, the existence of a human who is “naturally” part of Equestria’s magical field would give them a baseline on how to identify and isolate the powers of unicorns, pegasi, and earth ponies.
Plus, being the mother to the first human born in Equestria would make her an instant celebrity.
6044269 Speaking as somebody who knows how government works, the first thing that would happen to the expectant mother would be a stunningly-rapid trip back to Earth, followed by an endless chewing out by countless superiors, constant medical monitoring to ensure the project had not endangered the life of the employee or the child, followed by certain termination of the employee's contract.
Of course, they would write a book and go on the lecture circuit, but odds are they would never be permitted back to Equestria.
Got to say, I fricking love this.
6042388 and
6042919 aren't the only ones who prefer your slice-of-life chapters but at least for me that's for two reasons:
1) I prefer slice-of-life in general
2) You just write it so damn well
Why do I get the feeling that Pinkie visits Bon-Bon every once in a while and annoys her by singing The Candymare can~
This is awesome
!
I love that Project Sunflower is moving ahead with the plot line, but these slice of life scenes are really what made me fall in love with the story in the first place. I hope to see more of them in the future!
Welp, looks like I have another thing to track
6043291 Well it was my birthday about a week ago, soooo close enough
That was my cheap laugh for the day.
Dammit, McGee, yet ANOTHER story I have to put on my favorites! You're just trying to monoplize the list, aren't you?!
(...not that I mind if you are.
)
6044304
That doesn't make any sense in the context of this story, because there is already a growing human settlement in Zebrica.
Military recruits had always made perfect "experimental subjects" for the U.S. gov't. They would ofc closely monitor the pregnant recruit, so that they can predict what would eventually happen to the civilian human settlement. The recruit can't exactly say no, because it's either "volunteer for the good of humanity" or dishonourable discharge.
6045774
I don't know what that means.
6042757 Or even like BJ in MASH who claimed that his name *was* Bee Jay. *snerk*
6046302 I think he means the sort of techies that might be able to solve your problem, but you DEFINITELY don't want them near your daughter or wife. And you certainly don't want the neighbors to see them, hear them, or know they were there. The sort who can rebuild your house overnight -- and then throw a drunken kegger party (with strippers!) on your front lawn to celebrate their success... while your neighbors are watching.
6046693
So not the type of tech you want to send on a diplomatically sensitive mission.
6042232
Hoopy you should know better by now! Everyone knows that writers are physically incapable of recognizing mistakes in their own writing until after it's been published!
Also, I find it entertaining that these two chapters would put forth with several changes un-edited, which likely annoyed your editors, immediately after a chapter that was essentially a little "gift" sort of story about their OCs. Ironic, or something approaching it.
I'm so glad this exists. This series is one of the few stories on my "favorites" list for this site that I still read as soon as I can when it updates.
Thanks for writing this. It'll be great to see your world from even more perspectives!
RD scolding slackers? The irony
Alicorn OC
Disappointment
Thanks for the laugh.
6046693
Seeing that last line happen to at a neighbors house would have me laughing my ass off.
6049850
Same for me. That was a good one.
I'm hoping/waiting for when Erin meets Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon.
Can't help but wonder with the wifi going in if Bric-a-brac's store (from the original side stories) will be one of those with a relay point and if Sunflower is going to help her with online sales like she said
Awesome, love your Sunflower stories and side stories.
6047111 Most definitely not. We had a crew like that in Europe back when I was still active duty. They could fix or solve ANY problem.
And they'd get you on the front page news in the process. And never in a good way. *sighs* Our CO's rode herd on those guys so hard - but when crap hit the fan, they were the first problem solvers we turned to.
6052751
Yeah but that's military, not diplomatic; very different services. Besides, who cares what the euro weenies think? They're already convinced we're boorish and uncultured, the ponies probably haven't made up their minds yet.
6047889 It makes more sense in context.
(Also, she's not a real alicorn. More like a rough approximation of one, cobbled together by human "Science!!!" with the hope that she can study the magic of all three races without having to take a dunk in a nanite bath to switch species every couple months. If you prefer, she's like a homebrew PC running a bootleg copy of Windows 98 while Twilight's a Macbook Pro.)
Hoopy, I love love LOVE these stories!
I haven't read much FimFiction since I got a job a little over a year ago, and so a few weeks back I decided to look at the highest rated stories to get back into it with. That's where I found Project Sunflower. I looked up a story reading for it on YouTube (since I didn't feel like doing actual reading myself at the time 
), and after the first couple chapters you had me hooked. As of now, I've heard/read every chapter of all four entries. Each one was great. Bravo to you, Hoopy, and your team for a job well done. 
I liked this so much that I must say again- I sincerely love this series. Thank you.
I don't usually throw so much praise at someone, but this work is worth it. The only downside is that I've now exhausted what's available. 
6049892
It could have been from a hot air balloon, but pegasi could still do better: They can literally paint this perspective from their house.
6058873 You're not the first.
6041455 A Dream That Wasn't is indeed excellent. I haven't seen an update for it in a while though.
Yes, Pinkie, yes I would.
You haven't lived until you've been chewed out for slacking by a tiny rainbow horse. Who then probably took a nap, possibly even within eyesight.
6059647 Indeed. I emailed the author 2 weeks ago and he still hasn't responded. However I don't think he's gone and I do think he'll come back eventually. His last blog was December 2014 so I think he's still alive
He is in the army so i could understand why he is gone so often.