The Misadventure Of: A Bunch Of Silly Ponies That Just So Happen To Not Be Applejack

by OCisbestpony

Chapter Three: Part Five

Chapter Three: Part Five

“We're almost there, I promise!” the little fungee ponee said, jumping up and down in the air in her excitement.

“Are we? I rec-” he slipped and got a face-full of mud, “Blehh! Anyway, as I was saying, I recall you having said that over an hour ago!”

“An hour? What's that?” she tilted her tiny head in confusion as she looked at him.

“Right, you fungee ponees have no sense of time, do you?” he said more to himself then to them. Wait … time? Time, time, time… There was something about that word. What was it? Oh! This was so frustrating! He grunted and slammed his hoof down.

“Are you okay?” she asked, looking a bit concerned.

“Well, to be honest, not particularly. There's something about that word, 'time', that sticks out to me. Though I don't what or why.” he shook his head.

“Hum...” a thoughtful pose was an interesting one for one of her size to take, but she pulled it off well. “I wish I could help you, I really do. I-I just...” she then turned an odd shade of red and turned her back to him. She then cleared her teeny-tiny throat, and turned to face him again, “Anyway, Like I said, we're not far. Just a little more.”

He grumbled slightly, but said nothing more. All of this swamp nonsense was putting him into a foul mood indeed. Though, he did have to admit, looking at her made him feel slightly better. Even if he often stumbled into things 'cause he wouldn't stop looking at her. Though he could hardly be blamed! It wasn't his fault she was so prett-erm-fascina-um-interesting! Yes! Interesting! Why, how could one NOT look at h-them? After all, how often does one get to look at such interesting creatures? He smiled (and she suddenly turned beat-red, though he didn't notice). Yes! That was it! He was simply observing something he'd never seen before, that's all.

They traveled in silence after that. Relative silence anyway. He made the odd grunt or 'ow' as he made his way, and the fungee ponees hopped and hipped and even jumped about making little noises to each other as they did. He envied them. They seemed so carefree and simply happy to be alive. Not only that, they floated so easily through the air, or bounced so easily off the ground (as not all of them floated about).

Why, he even envied the fact that one of them just floated right through a solid tree trunk. Granted, he'd never seen ANYTHING pass through a sold object before, so that just made the envy all the mor-WAIT, WHAT?

He shook his head and looked again. It was gone entirely. That is, the fungee ponee was gone. He stopped, and looked around him. Most of the other ones were gone as well, and the ones he could see had suddenly become increasingly see-through. He watched in mixed parts horror and fascination as the little things simply vanished into the air, one after the other. One of them even turned to him and waved goodbye before it vanished. He then looked ahead, afraid of what he might see what had become of the one he had become so enamored with.

She simply hovered there in the air in front of him, smiling. “I'm glad you made it!” she said with transparent lips.

“M-Made it?” he said, suddenly feeling very, very nervous.

She nodded and smiled all the sweeter. “Yep. You made it to The Hydra. And don't worry, you're in good hooves!”

There were the last words she said before she too vanished all together, leaving him alone in a large clearing covered by a high canopy.

“W-WAIT!” he said, panic rising in his voice. Then, a thought crossed his mind. Had he just been led into a trap?

The earth suddenly shook, and his irises shrank to the size of tiny coins. He heard a massive footstep, and the earth shook once more. His lips pressed tightly as he looked for the source. Another step, another quake. This time, the trees directly across from him shook. A fourth step rocked the earth, and knocked him from his reverie. He promptly turned right around, and booked it out of there.

Or not…

You see, upon turning about he suddenly found himself face to face with a very large triangular head with green eyes that looked at him hungrily. His ears dropped and he back up several steps before he felt himself run right into something. 'Oh please don't let it be what I think it is…'

Sadly, it was. It was another large head, almost identical to the other that had appeared behind him. Then from the trees to the left burst forth two more heads, followed by one massive body. He backed up as far as he could, and stopped when he bumped into yet another something. Normally, he would have loved to look at what it was, but the fact that a massive creature with four heads was currently standing over him (all of said heads looking very hungry), quelled his curiosity (it was a stump).

“P-please don't eat me...” he said as giant sweat drops fell down his face.

“Come come now, old boy! What kind of doctor eats their patient?” the left-most head said.

*****

Colgate shook her head as she wrapped another bandage around Bon-Bon's leg. The poor girl let out a painful squeak as Colgate finished it off with a bow.

“Not so tight!” she protested.

“It needs to be. Trust me.” Colgate said with a nod that settled the matter. She looked over at Berry as she too applied bandages to Lyra. While Berry had no spell to numb most of the pain with, she had done her best by giving Lyra a bit more of the drink. This, of course, turned Lyra back into a regular pony once more, and had the intended effect of reducing the pain she felt, but she did end up a bit tipsy. Well, fairly tipsy. Really tipsy.

Okay, okay, she's straight-up drunk. On the bright side, she's actually a nice drunk. On the not-so-bright-side, she's a unicorn, and drinking and magic never mix well. Thankfully, however, Colgate had that lovely numbing Novocaine spell with which to drug Lyra into a rather passive state. Granted, that wasn't exactly how that spell was supposed to be used, nor was it strictly speaking safe, but a passive unicorn was better then a drunk unicorn.

Colgate sighed. Best to get this over with. “Alright Bon-Bon, sit tight for a moment while I help Berry.” Bon-Bon nodded, and Colgate walked next to Berry's side. “How's our patient?” she asked, looking at the wobbling form of Lyra.

“Plastered,” Berry answered, tying a tight knot around her mid-section, “but fine otherwise. Wish she hadn't drank so much though. She really needs to lean to pace herself.”

“She never was very good at that.” Bon-Bon said. “She's actually kind of a nightmare to take to parties. She is very pleasant at first, but she often gets into chugging matches and she is never one to refuse a good challenge.” She simply shook her head.

“H-HEY!” Lyra slurred. “Just because little lily head's gotta hit the rucky rock pores, doesn't mean that ruly’s fondue is gonna shine, okay?”

“Come again?” Bon-Bon asked. Berry held up a hoof to silence her.

“No, no. She makes a good point.” Berry looked at Lyra with a deeply serious look. “So rig bang's hipper's gonna rip-roll hound's lagoon?”

Lyra's eyes opened wide in surprise as she began nodding, sideways. Colgate actually thought that she was shaking her head at first, but judging from the fact that her head was now tilted sideways, she figured that was not the case.

“I … should I be surprised by this? This ability to talk to a drunk pony?” Bon-Bon asked Colgate, who shook her head.

“It's something she's always known how to do, for as long as I've known her anyway.” Colgate shrugged. “She's also really good at acting drunk as well.”

“Wait, Berry's actually been sober before?” Bon-Bon asked, with a bit more honest surprise then was perhaps necessary.

Berry's ears suddenly perked up, and Colgate saw her face suddenly flush with an angry red. “What?!” Berry growled. She whipped her head around and looked at Bon-Bon as though she had just insulted her rather harshly (which, you know, she kinda did...).

“I … uh, well, it's just that...” Bon-Bon began, sputtering to regain her composure.

“Berry, it's alright. I know you're not like that. It's okay. Just remember: Breath, okay?” Colgate said calmly, holding a hoof in the air. Berry let out a few breaths as Colgate's horn began to glow and wrap Lyra's head in her magic. “So, what did Lyra say?”

It took a few moments for her magic to sink into Lyra's brain (as numbing the mind of a pony is far more complicated then a mouth). During which Berry calmed down a bit. “She said that the two of them cleared a path through the swamp we could use.”

Colgate smiled. “Really?” she turned and looked at Bon-Bon expectantly.

“Colgate, your spell.” Bon-Bon pointed a hoof.

She snapped her head back at Lyra and regained her focus. She had to be careful lest she accidentally numb her too mu-

Lyra's eyes rolled to the side and her head flopped over as her tongue rolled out of her mouth. She also began drooling a bit (it was not one of her more graceful moments). She then let out something of a gurgle/hum combination as even more drool made its way out. At least it sounded like a happy hum-gurgle.

Colgate blinked. “Uh … oops.”

For a moment, Colgate thought that perhaps there was something of an echo in the air, as she suddenly heard the sound of a hoof and face meeting happen not once, but twice. But, when she turned around, she saw that both of her friends stood there with hooves in their faces.

“Really Colgate?” Berry asked. “Really?”

“Is she going to be okay?” Bon-Bon asked with some concern in her voice.

“Yeah, she should be fine. Though...” she looked back at Lyra apprehensively. She's never really done that before to a pony before. She figured that the Novocaine should work its way out of her system eventually, but when it's put directly into the brain...

“Though what?” Bon-Bon asked, raising an intense eye-brow. “This is my best friend we're talking about here. Is she going to be okay?”

Colgate began sweating a little. “Well, normally this stuff shouldn't last too long. She should be good in like an hour … or so.” Or so she hoped.

“Can you walk?” Berry asked Lyra, who's glazed eyes simply looked at her, or perhaps even through her. “I, uh, think we might have to carry her.” Berry said.

“I see. Well, that should be easy enough. Lyra, gra-” Bon-Bon paused. She looked at her, then at Colgate, then Berry, then Colgate again. She was clearly not amused. “Right. I forgot for a moment that she can't help. Berry, I need you to find two long, and very sturdy sticks. Colgate, I need you to see if you can find anything that might be useful for rope. I'm going to see if I can find something strong enough to lay her on.” There was a pause. “Well? Let's hurry! We don't want to be stuck here any longer then necessary!”

“What about her?” Colgate asked, pointing at Lyra.

Bon-Bon considered for a moment. “Good point. Berry, you stay with her. Colgate, come with me, I'll need your magic.” Both ponies looked at each other and nodded. Berry ran over to Lyra's now prone side, and Colgate walked next to Bon-Bon. “Alright. Follow close. And remember, don't drink the swamp water!”

Colgate nodded as Bon-Bon stood, and let out a painful groan. “Uh, perhaps you should just tell me what you need?” Colgate offered. She felt bad for the poor mare. Doing what they had done couldn't have felt good on her poor body.

“No! I must … endure it! This is Lyra we're talking about here. She would do the same for me!” Bon-Bon said, gritting her teeth.

“Are you sure? I mean, you two did, and took, a lot of damage.” she looked towards the place where their mighty brawl had begun. Though it wasn't obvious at first sight, now that she was looking, she could see that just beyond it lie a path of terrible destruction.

“Yes. Plus, I know what materials we need, and what they look like, and you don't. So I have little choice in the matter.” Bon-Bon grunted as she stood.

“Well, here, let me help a little.” Colgate offered, reaching out with her magic to help numb even more of her pain.

Bon-Bon waved a hoof. “No, what you have done is sufficient. Trust me, I will be fine.” She took a step forward, paused, then took another step forward. Colgate could tell it wasn't easy for her, but she was doing it all the same.

“Okay, if you're sure. After you then.” Colgate fell in step behind her and followed her as they made their way on to the new 'path', and thus deeper into the swamp.

*****

“So, what was that about?” Bon-Bon asked as she ducked under a branch. Her question was the first thing either of them had said after leaving Berry and Lyra behind. It had been awhile, and Bon-Bon had begun to wonder if either of them were going to say anything. Though, perhaps Colgate had remained silent because she didn't know what to say. That, or there was the fact that Bon-Bon was in excruciating pain as Colgate's numbing spell had sapped away with surprising speed. Either way, the silence had been broken, and Bon-Bon was glad for it.

“Berry snapping?” Colgate asked.

“Yeah.” Bon-Bon looked back at her.

“Well, you remember that time at Diamond Tiara's party when she drank from the punch bowl?” Colgate asked as she levitated a small log out of the way.

“I think so. It has been quite a long time.” Bon-Bon admitted. Her memory was pretty good, but random moments like that were hard to recall.

“And do you remember how we all laughed about it afterward?” Colgate looked back at her, clearly hoping she did.

“Hum. It is a bit fuzzy, but I think so.” Bon-Bon replied. It wasn't fully true, but then again, it was hard to think through the crippling pain that was currently being alive (the numbness had completely worn off by this point), so it was possible that she could, just not right now.

Colgate suddenly seemed a little sad. “Well, not everypony was laughing with her. There were some who were-”

“Laughing at her?” Bon-Bon guessed.

Colgate nodded slowly. “Yeah. It's no secret that someponies in town arn't the nicest. And they like to laugh about her behind her back. They even spread rumors sometimes.” Colgate said sadly. “That and, she's kinda alone now. I mean, I kinda am her only friend.”

Bon-Bon's eyes widened with surprise. “Really? I had no idea!”

“Yeah. So, she's kinda sensitive about it. Well, the drinking anyway. She started snapping at ponies all over town, so I took her to some anger management classes to help. Thankfully, most of it stuck, and now she's just kinda coping with it.” Colgate shook her head sadly. “But, if she sticks to the whole not-drinking thing, then hopefully that'll change.” She smiled a little. “That would be nice. She's a really nice pony, and a pretty good friend. I really home the ponies at home can start to see that again.”

Bon-Bon went quiet. She hadn't fully known all of this. She recalled that Berry had said something like that, but to hear Colgate more or less confirm that she was the ONLY friend Berry had anymore; that was hard to take. She thought about that for a moment. “Are you sure about that?” she looked at Colgate with uncertainty.

Colgate nodded. “I've been paying attention. The last pony to actually visit her aside from me stopped by a month ago. Hasn't been back since.”

“What about Pinkie Pie?” Bon-Bon raised an eyebrow.

She shook her head. “She's been too busy as of late to swing by. I mean, sure she's everypony's friend, but it's not like she has time to visit and hang out with every pony in Ponyville.” she paused. “Okay, she kinda does, but it's still been a long time since she and Berry had a chance to hang out.”

“I see.” Bon-Bon looked thoughtfully at the ground. “I had no idea...”

Colgate shook her head gently. “Most ponies don't. So don't feel too bad that you didn't. Just like most ponies don't realize that she's actually pretty self-conscious about her drinking habits.”

“How do you know all of this?” Bon-Bon asked. As she did so, she spotted what looked like a good vine for rope. “Also, could you grab that vine up there? It looks to be the right width.” She pointed up with a hoof, and felt a lovely shot of pain for it.

Colgate looked up, wrapped the vine with her magic, and gave it a hard yank. The branches rustled, and some water fell on their heads, but it remained in place. “Well, you see, we've been friends for a really long time. We actually met-” she paused as she gave it another hard yank. It still didn't come loose, but Bon-Bon saw that it had gained some slack.

“Keep trying. I can tell you are making good progress.” Bon-Bon said, keeping a cautious eye on it.

Colgate nodded. “-way back in kindergarten. She was one of the few ponies who didn't care about my cutiemark.”

“I take it the other foals did.” Bon-Bon responded, moving slowly to the side as Colgate gave the vine another hard tug.

“Yeah. They kinda teased me about it.” she grunted, and frowned slightly. “Anyway, she didn't and that was winning points in my book, and we've been friends ever since.”

Bon-Bon looked at her with some envy. She wished that she could remember the first time she met Lyra. But, as far as she could remember, they'd always been together.

“What about you two? How long have you two known each other?” Colgate asked as she gave another hard tug, this one with a bit more force then before.

Bon-Bon thought for a moment. “I actually don't know. As far as I can remember, we've always known each other.”

“Really?” Colgate turned to look at her in surprise.

“Yeah.” Bon-Bon said distantly.

“Wow. And how long it that?” she asked as she dug in her hooves, let out a snort and tugged hard with her magic.

Bon-Bon wasn't fully sure, but she had a decent idea. “I think it's been-”

And then a pony fell right on top of her.

Author's Note:

So, I couldn't help but notice that it had been exactly one month since I've updated. Goodness, I'm a silly one!

Pity it was I didn't even leave off on a good cliff-hanger either.

Still, have a bit more. I wrote it with love. Love and
Sadly, that's a lie. I'm no wizard, or else I would have sent this back into the past to upload it the day after the previous installment. But such is life.

Comments

[Alondro]

“Come come now, old boy! What kind of doctor eats their patient?” the left-most head said.

Alondro just looks about nervously from side to side and says nothing...