The Misadventure Of: A Bunch Of Silly Ponies That Just So Happen To Not Be Applejack

by OCisbestpony

Chapter Two: Part Thirteen

Chapter Two: Part Thirteen

“Awake, Awake, little pony, for your own sake.” came a distant voice. “Rise and shine, little Colgate.”

She was far away, not yet departed from the land of dreams. The speaker's strange voice beckoned her to leave that blissful place, though it came from the body of Berry. For, you see, Berry had just concluded a moving lecture about the finer points of applying magnanimous mushroom to the gums and forehooves of ponies, Princesses (why Princesses were different then ponies Berry never explained), donkeys, and dragons. She had even brought a dragon on stage to show just how sparkly its front hooves were after a careful application of said fungi. Not to mention their youthful shine! It's simply age-defying! Truly, something everypony ought to have in their collection. Not to mention the health benefits! Why-

“You have rested long enough, now arise before I get rough!” the dragon said. The captive audience roared with applause and wept with tears of joy and sorrow! Sorrow for their days spent with terrible forehoof pain, and joy for the wondrous end of it! Inde-

Her eyes shot open as her senses suddenly received a punch to their collective faces. The first thing she saw was a zebra's face framed by what looked to be a ceiling. It was then she realized that she was lying on her back. The second thing she saw was said zebra putting a cork into what looked like a small potion bottle.

“Z-Zecora?” Colgate stammered out, “W-what's going on? Where are we?”

“It is good that you are awake, for you have much trouble to make.” she replied with a sly grin.

“Huh? What?” Colgate blinked a few times.

“But first, you should get off your back and onto your hooves.” She said, her face wincing slightly with pain.

Colgate blinked a few more times, then scrambled to her hooves. It was a little more difficult to do then she had expected, as her poor body was terribly sore from lying on a hard stone floor. Now on her hooves (and one pain-numbing spell later), she glanced about.

She was still in the barrel room.

Rats...

The candles on the desk (said desk being behind Zecora) were lit and filling the room with their dim light. It cast an eerie glow over the place, making shadows that would have awoken many a filly at night with a terrible fright. Indeed, the shadows were deep, and they took sinister forms that had claws as sharp as razors and teeth larger then spikes. Colgate paused, and put a thoughtful hoof to her chin. Do shadows have to brush their teeth? And if so, then what kind of toothbrush would they use? Did they use paste? Or even flos-

Zecora cleared her throat, derailing Colgate's train of thought. “Oh, sorry Zecora. I … uh … got a little sidetracked there.”

“Yes, this was obvious to me. But now, we need to talk, my dear pony.” Zecora said, her face becoming noticeably more serious.

“About what? What's going on? How did you get here? How do we get out? Where are we?” Colgate fired out almost all at once.

“Calm down, take a rest. Dropping your frown would be best. 'What's going on? You ask. You already know, still, I'll address your task. By magic's touch you've found this place, the danger here draws your friends with haste. I allowed myself to be touched by magic's embrace, also finding myself in this far away place.” Zecora explained. Colgate found herself wishing she would just speak like a normal pony. Granted, she liked how poetic Zecora's speech was, but she did find it hard to understand from time to time.

“Wait, what do you mean by 'touched by magic's embrace'?” Colgate asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Ah, that that answer is short, for by that, I mean we came here by magical teleport.”

“But, why?” Colgate asked. “Why did you come here?”

“Patience, my little pony. Next you ask, 'Where are we?' to which I say, what do your eyes see? A lab, and also storage, under a dragons lair, so you must show courage. But I see you need to know more to end your sully, so I will tell you that we are in Deadmare Gully.”

“Deadmare Gully?” Colgate blinked a few times. Deadmare Gully? Where was that?

“That is the location of our little dungeon. It is two days south of Dodge Junction.”

“I-we're two days south of Dodge?” Colgate's mouth dropped a little. “Wait … does that mean that cave's a day's travel from here?” Zecora nodded. “So, that means the teleporter is halfway then?” Another nod. “So, wait, I'm confused. What exactly is going on here? Why are you here?”

“Quite a tale to tell, starting from the sleep where you fell. While you slept the time away, your friends chose not to stay. From the edge of the Everfree, on an ill-fated train they did ride. When bandits came, you were stolen in stride. To a cave the brought you, where magic grasped you.” Zecora paused for a moment, then looked around. “And now, here we are.” She said rather casually, and with another wince of pain.

“Wait, hold on.” Colgate said, raising a hoof. “So how are you involved in all of this? Like, why are you here? How did you get here?”

“That was easy. I simply followed all of you. It's easy to follow a train as well as the tracks of several angry ponies.” Zecora said as patiently as she could, though Colgate could tell that something wasn't right. For one thing, that didn't rhyme. And it wasn't the first time either. For another thing, she tensed up as she spoke, as if doing so hurt.

“Huh. So … you just followed us out of the Everfree, and to a bunch of rocks that bandits use?” Colgate asked, an eyebrow raised. This all seemed a bit far fetched.

“Correct, and now you ask why. At first, it was to investigate that accursed brew. With new horn and wings I flew! How could it do that, I asked? A brew that gives power unsurpassed? To my home I had hoped to take a sample, but I had to follow you to get enough to be ample.” Zecora explained.

“You know, in speaking of that, why did you drink that thing? I mean, there's no way you would have ever done that, right?”

Zecora let out a sigh,“What you say is true, and I would have simply left you. But, the brew was strong, and though I knew it wrong, I felt compelled to flow along. He was a perfect stallion, I saw, and his words rang truer any law. And though I tried to fight it, its power was too great for my wit. And when he offered me to drink, try as I might, i just couldn't think, my will standing on the brink, and down my throat the potion did sink.” She shook her head, clearly she was somewhat embarrassed, if not somewhat ashamed, about what had happened.

“And so you decided to follow us to get the bottle?” Colgate confirmed.

Zecora nodded, “Yes. But your camp I did come upon, where your friends slept soundly on. Your foes, bound in ropes, and magic in the air that rose my hopes. On your friend, a note in her apparel, that matches the marks on this barrel. And when I sought that your fate was not tragic, I found the teleporter, laced with your magic.”

“Wait,” Colgate raised a hoof once more to cut her off, “How did you know it was my magic?”

“Every unicorn's magic feels different. You see it as a color. I do as well, but I pick something up else as well. It is much like how everypony has a different sent, and how dogs use that to locate and identify ponies.” Zecora said though gritted teeth.

“Zecora, are you okay? What's wrong?”

“It seems the potion's ill effects have not fully released me yet, for my natural way of speaking has not fully returned to me; a fact that fills me with regret.” Zecora said, breaking eye contact for a moment.

“But, why? Does it have to do with you wincing in pain? Wait, are you telling me it actually hurts to not talk in ryhme for you!?” Colgate couldn't belive it. There was no way tha-

Zecora nodded.

“I-I...” Colgate wanted to say something, but words failed her completely.

“Off the topic we have wondered, for there are other questions you wanted answered.” She said, looking once more at Colgate.

“R-Right. Uh, So … what does my magic feel like?” Colgate ventured.

“Ancient” came the simple answer.

Colgate blinked. “Ancient? I'm not that old!” she objected.

“No little pony, you misunderstand. A unicorn's magic feels the same no matter their age. In my native tongue I have words to describe this, but in this one, I cannot. So I cannot tell you fully what your magic 'feels' like, but I can tell you that your magic … is ancient.” she said, her face almost grave. “I do not know how, but it is old. Very, very, very old.”

“How old is old?” Colgate said, partly afraid of the answer.

“I do not know.” she said, shaking her head, and giving a shrug. “But do not let that fill you with woe. Pushing that aside, after I activated the teleporter, I arrived here to find you asleep upon the floor. I knew there was no waking you, despite your adorable little snore. So, I investigated. I opened barrels, read schematics, and ventured into the dragon's den. There, I saw the great beast still in slumber, so I went beyond the chamber and found too many passageways to number. After much time, I found a route, and into Deadmare Gully I did come out. There, in a moment of clarity, I caught a glimpse of your destiny. You must be ready to act Colgate, for there is much to do and your journey is not yet finished. Destiny will call for you and your friends this day. But until then, here you must stay.”

“No.” Colgate suddenly said. “I'm not waiting for anypony. I'm not one to sit around, and since I have my magic back, I'm going to go right out of this gully, and I'm going head straight to the Princesses.” There was nothing in Equestria that was going to keep her here! Nothing whatsoever! She stood, turned to the path between the barrels that lead out, and stopped in her tracks. Did Zecora say 'schematics'?

“What worry has stopped your big hurry?” Zecora asked, raising an eyebrow.

“You said, 'schematics', right? What schematics?” She ventured, slowly turning her head to the zebra.

Zecora cracked a bit of a grin. “I see you do not read that language. You see, each of those papers are attempts to recreate or copy the original cloth. They were plans, most of them untried, but a few were actually attempted, and even fewer succeeded. Those that were made did not copy the powers of the original. Indeed, by comparison, their power was quite pitiful.”

“What can the original do?”

“It can wipe a pony completely clean from the fabric of time.” Zecora paused for a moment. “That is, it wipes who they are, what they can do, and the memories of all ponies who remember them, completely away. No, not wipe away, but absorb. You see, what is on these scrolls is only an image. The real marks, and their power, and memories, are all inside the original. The original red and gold cloth.” She then let out a low groan, and placed a hoof on her head. It was clear that talking was taking quite a toll on the poor Zebra.

Colgate swallowed, hard. “So, you're saying that the cloth that the griffin was using to wipe off Cutie Marks was actually absorbing them, and the pony's identity?” Her eyes were wide in shock.

“That is correct. But strangely enough, only upon ponies does it have an effect. Not even I would be affected by it. Not only that, it also, is very, very old.”

“As old as my magic?” Colgate half joked.

Zecora shook her head.

“So, Who made it?”

“A mystery I do not know, perhaps one day you shall though.” Zecroa shrugged.

“Well, who made the copies then?” Colgate was eager to hear this answer. She couldn't wait to get her hooves on whoever made that awful cloth!

“If I had to guess, it would be this griffin that took you hostage.”

“Hold on, I've been meaning to ask you about that. From what you've said, it sounds like you showed up after everything had happened. How do you even know it was griffin that did all this?” Colgate asked, eyebrow raised.

Zecora simply smiled mysteriously. “Your friends are not the only ones who can hop onto a moving train. Nor are they the only ones who know something of this villain of a griffin.”

Colgate's head begun to spin. This was so much information to take in all at once. Well, ok, it wasn't so much that it was a lot of information, but that it was being delivered via rhyme (well, okay, like half of it) and in a dark cave right after she had woken up from what felt like almost two days worth of danger, intrigue, and a dash of terror. Now, if she had prepared with quills, a good solid breakfast, and even a bit of morning jogging (gotta keep that trim figure she was proud of), then processing all of this would have been a snap. But, as it was, it was anything thing but a snap … save the small snap in her psyche if she had to listen to much more of this.

“Alright. Listen, I'm going to go. Thanks for all of the information, but I've got to sort all of this out. I've got a ton more questions, but I can't think straight right now.” Then an idea struck her. “Hey, Zecora, why don't you activate the teleporter here and send us both back?” She said, her face suddenly covered with a very large and very happy smile.

“I do not mean to rip your hopes asunder, but I cannot awaken it from its slumber. And besides, it' a one way.” She said, standing to her hooves as well.

“I-I-It's a one way!? Are you insane!? You willingly stepped into a one-way teleporter not knowing where it would take you!?” Colgate was stunned. She had never thought Zecora could be so reckless.

“Oh, but you see my little Colgate, I knew where I was going. Therefore, I did not stumble into this unknowing.” She responded, her mysterious smile becoming even more enigmatic, and painful.

It was about that point Colgate had decided that she had just enough of mysteries and Zecora's rhymes. “You know what? Fine. Thank you for coming after me, I really mean it. But we've got to go, we can't stay here!” she exclaimed and dashed for the exit.

She never knew that she had ended up tripping head over hoof and had tumbled and rolled right into a stack of barrels. For, as she had started her gallop, Zecora had quite suddenly, and quite deftly, tossed the cloth onto her horn once more, knocking her out immediately in the process.

“I'm am sorry to have lied to you my dear Colgate. But you must stay here until your friends arrive, for all of yours' is an important fate.” She looked down at her, regret for her dishonesty swelling inside. She walked over to Colgate's side, knelt down, and gave her something to drink. If Zecora guessed right, this potion would keep her out until the others arrived. She pulled out a small pouch made of a lion's mane (generously given mind you, for the lion had come in for a hair-cut and agreed to let Zecora keep the clippings. Zecora did not cut his hair, but was at the barber shop at the same time none-the-less), and placed the brown cloth inside of it. She attached a note to it that said, “Here is the swath. Give it to the one who can understand the cloth.”

With that, she stood, turned to the portal, tossed a bit of Golden Dust upon it (causing it to flare to life), and limped through the portal...

Author's Note:

Come children, gather around and wrap yourselves in some warm blankets for a little story I have to tell.

But before that, this chapter would not have been possible without the help of MrAlterad, who provided many of the rhymes. Many thousands of thanks for your help.

There once was a young human. Now, this human loved to write about silly things. And they did! And they shared their silly stories with all of their friends. Such lovely friends, one and all! One day, a friend of this young human said,

"Young Human, y u so mean to your characters?!"

To which the young human said,

"Whatever do you mean? I'm silly, not mean at all!" But the young human doubted their own words, and read their silly stories with a new light. As it turned out, the young human's friend was right! Shocked, the young human began to think upon this. 'How had this happened?' the young human asked themselves. 'How could it be that I am so mean? Silly, yes, but mean none-the-less!' Still, the young human loved to write silly things, and, undeterred, charged forward with reckless abandon!

Right into the gaping jaws of karmafate! (I-is that a word? I don't think it is...)

'Ah!' said the young human, 'I shall write a chapter of a silly story in which a wise Zebra offers answers to many burning questions! What a grand idea!' the human thought. However, after beginning, the foolish human began to discover something tragic.

The young human had no talent for rhyme.

Undeterred, the human charged forward! 'I can go back and change it all after I'm done!' thought the young one. 'Surely, once I know what the wise zebra is trying to say, I can build rhymes around it! Yes, this will be easy!'

How very wrong the poor human was.

So, battered and beaten by their own foolishness, they turned to their lovely friends for help.

"Friend, do you have a talent for rhyme?" the human implored.

"Let me try." Said the kind friend. And so, after many days, the friend came back, and said, "Young Human, I have done as you have asked, and here is what I have written."

So impressed was the young one with their friend, they said, "Oh friend of mine, you have done very well. Please, can you do a little more?"

"Very well, but not much more." The friend said, tired and exhausted.

And so, many more days passed, and once again the friend returned. "I have done as you have asked, and I ask, no more." Tired was the dear friend, and grateful was the human.

"You have done enough, thank you!" And with that, the human took their friend's mighty work, and put it into the chapter. But, the young human was not done. For they needed to make their friend's words, their own. 'This will be easy!' the young human said, 'Why, half the work is done!'

But how foolish is youth, for the pain had only begun.

Once again the young human's lack of talent came back, and this time, they had no help to turn to. And so, the poor, poor human, victim to their own foolhardy youth, and the karma of their cruelty, was forced to rhyme the rhymes they had so feared...

And so children, we come to a close of this tragic story. But not all is lost, for the young human still writes their silly things, and will continue to do so. But always remember children,

Be kind to your characters, lest someday, karma comes back to haunt you...