Dear Princess Celestia,
After
throwing darts at a wall with picturcareful consideration, I have decided to recruit the pony known as Vinyl Scratch next. Her proficiency with technology and magic will make her an excellent asset for my team, and we already have something in common in the form of the Elements of Harmony, which as you recall we used to defeat your misguided sister, who I hope has recovered by now. Is she still seeing double?In any case, given that my current headquarters are in Ponyville and the fact that Miss Scratch keeps moving around from Canterlot to Manehattan to Baltimare, I think the best course of action is to find her before she moves again. Why does she move so much? Is it her wandering spirit? Or perhaps she's just that dedicated to her music? I guess I will find out.
Your Faithful Student,
Commander Twilight Sparkle
Dear Wrex,
As fun as you are and despite your almost legendary stamina, I almost want to wring your neck for telling Twilight Sparkle about your past.
Princess Celestia (aka Sunbutt.)
PS: Tell me when you're planning on visiting again?
Vinyl Scratch levitated the key to her apartment just as she was turning around the last flight of steps, but she sighed and put it away when she noticed the door had been forced open. Angrily, she kicked it open the whole way and turned on the light, revealing the completely destroyed state it was in now.
"They found me again," she muttered, stepping carefully over a wrecked speaker. "And I didn't even register my new address. How do they keep doing that?"
She shook her head in annoyance as she levitated things off the floor, mostly grunting as she had to throw them into a trash bag. "This needs to stop," she growled. "They can't keep getting away with it! But how do I stop them?"
It was then that green flames materialized in the center of her room, spinning in place to reveal a scroll, which dropped to the floor unceremoniously.
Blinking, Vinyl Scratch levitated it off the floor, and closing the door behind her, opened it up.
"Hello, Miss Scratch."
"AAAAAH!" Vinyl jumped back and away from the blue ghostly apparition that coalesced over the scroll.
"Please," Twilight Sparkle rolled her eyes. "It's not that impressive."
"Twilight Sparkle?" Vinyl asked, carefully making her way to the scroll. "What-how..."
"It's a projection of myself through an enchanted scroll. Nothing to freak over," Twilight said. "I'll be direct: you are an Element of Harmony, and we have a mission to protect Equestria together. I need you to be part of my team."
"Oh, geez," Vinyl Scratch scratched the back of her head. "Wasn't that a one time thing? I'd rather work solo, if you catch my drift."
"I do, but I don't care," Twilight said. "I realize this is a big thing to ask, so I am not going to simply force you to do it, even if I could by royal edict."
"You're not a princess," Vinyl pointed out.
"No, but I am basically the adopted daughter of one," Twilight shrugged. "In any case, I'm not trying to force you to it. I want to be a willing partner, as it is, so I am willing to offer you something in return."
Vinyl blinked. "Like what?"
Twilight shrugged. "I'm not sure. What do you want? Do you have an item that needs to be fetched? We'll help you get it. An enemy that needs to be stopped? We'll help you stop them. You name it."
"I don't know..."
"Oh, come on now," Twilight narrowed her eyes. "Everypony wants something."
Vinyl sighed and looked at her destroyed apartment. She frowned and nodded. "You know what, Twilight? I do have something I'd love your help with."
"And if we help..."
"I'll be part of your team."
"It's a deal then."
Vinyl Scratch shifted uncomfortably under the gaze of Urdnot Wrex, but Twilight didn’t hold it against her. Most entities would do the exact same thing.
“So,” Twilight looked around the trashed apartment with a raised eyebrow and a slight air of approval. “Party hard, eh?” She proceeded to wander about the trashed room, taking a look at particularly brutalized items.
Vinyl sighed. “I wish. But no, this was done to my apartment while I was gone, and it has been happening for the last couple of years, notably after a big event happens… this, along with my big concerts being sabotaged, has made me very uncomfortable with accepting bigger jobs.”
Twilight looked over her shoulder back at Vinyl. “Have you been threatened with violence beyond that?”
Vinyl closed her eyes and nodded. “They haven’t done anything to me yet, but I’ve been wondering how long it will take them to get from trashing my things and messing with my performances to actually trying to do something. I mean, all of this?” She motioned with her hoof at the trashed apartment. "It started with angry notes on my door, then evolved into breaking in and drinking my booze, then hiding my things... then... well, you can see for yourself."
“The best way to answer violence is with significantly more damaging violence,” Twilight said. “That should dissuade them from ever attempting this again.” She paused. “You speak of the ponies that did this as if you know them.”
Vinyl nodded. “I do. They were part of my old garage band,” she said, levitating a picture for Twilight to see. “I’ve reported them to the police, but they haven’t been able to find evidence pointing at them. It's very frustrating." She shook her head. "And with my next concert coming up, I imagine that they'll try and sabotage my equipment or the concert itself. They're becoming more aggressive."
"Huh," Wrex grunted, leaning back against the wall. "I've seen things like this before. It started with a few incursions into a bar, and ended up with the Omega station being taken over by Cerberus and turned into a deathtrap with undead abominations with psionic powers."
Vinyl blinked. "I... I don't think this is exactly like that."
"Oh, but it is!" Twilight said. "First a few incursions, then they turn violent, and next thing you know the city is a battlezone!"
Vinyl blinked. "They're a bunch of disgruntled, talentless musicians who resent me going solo and becoming somewhat of a success."
"Exactly!" Twilight insisted. "This is the type of thing that creates groups such as the Blue Suns!"
"In Tuchanka we have a saying for when anyone would dare do this kind of thing to us," Wrex threw in, pulling out a large submachine gun and cocking it.
Vinyl waited politely for a few seconds before clearing her throat. "And what's the saying?"
Wrex cocked the gun again.
"Ah."
Twilight nodded. "Well then, we know what we need to do. We'll gather the team so far and prepare for the concert. Wrex and I will crash at your place until it happens."
Vinyl's shoulders slumped. "I don't think that's necessary."
"Nonesense," Twilight waved her hoof. "The least I could do for a future teammate. Besides, we need to know what we're getting into. You'll have to walk us through what will happen in your concert, where it will be and such things so that we can act accordingly."
Vinyl was about to protest when Twilight pulled out a very big bottle of vodka out of her backpack. She snapped her mouth shut.
"Wrex will go buy more," Twilight clarified. "But for now, I need you to show me where I'll sleep. I need to make sure it's big enough for me and Octavia."
"Oh, sure! This way." Vinyl turned and started walking towards the guestroom, slowing down as Twilight's words sank in. "Wait. Octavia?"
Dat ending.
Dammit D, stop publishing these so late! Woke my whole damn family up laughing.
There need to be more Krogan in Equestria stories.
Or more updates to this one. Either way, I will be happy.
Hehehe, I don't care if I wait for months, I'll still enjoy this.
I think I just had an aneurism reading this.... it's the only reason that can explain all of this uncontrollable laughter and giggling I am experiencing while reading this!
Wot.
I really, really this Twilight.
5554653
^ This pretty much sums up my thoughts so far as well!
5554895
Of course it does. Let's face the facts:
1)She has essentially TAMED Wrex, badass of the universe, second only to Garrus(aka, best friends ever)
2)She is now a violent badass.
3)She seduced Octavia.
4)Violent. Badass.
5554937
Violent is my favorite kind of badass!
Also her seducing Octavia was great.
Twilight this chapter: "we'll bang okay?"
5554942
I didn't see that coming at all, then the letter happened. And I laughed.
That was fun. Looking forward to more.
Keep up the good work. Deus tecum.
All of our yesses.
OMG, i love how Wrex "corrupt" Twi into a badass mare with a tendency for violence, drinking and sex.
Are you suggesting what I think you are suggesting?
My sides!
Looks like Wrex learned a couple of things from Sheppard.
How in gods name did I forget to favorite this forever ago? I'm so happy its back. Seriously, this made my day.
5554942
Yes, indeed it was.
My only complaint about this chapter is that unless Wrex duel-wields a pair of SMGs in the next chapter, that needs to be changed to an assault rifle. No self respecting Krogan would ever be caught with a single puny SMG, especially not the great Urdnot Wrex.
Otherwise, I look forward to seeing the vandals shitting their non-existent pants.
5558258
But what if it's the only weapon the commander lets him have?
5558546 The commander wouldn't risk his life forcing a Krogan, especially Wrex, to use an SMG. I always gave him the best shotgun I had. Garrus the best sniper rifle, and myself the best Assault rifle. Only team I ever used in ME1.
5558826
Yes, but Sparkle isn't Shepard. A charging Krogan isn't a threat when they're levitated off the ground and cannot gain traction.
Also, Wrex has a Sun Princess who is essentially an adoptive mother to Sparkle watching over his shoulder, so violence will bring only wrath and destruction.
Krogans can be surprisingly eloquent at times.
In any case, seeing how this mission develops will be very interesting. Especially if there's more to it than at first glance. Or if Twilight is convinced that there is.
As badass as Twilight is in this story, it should be narrated by Samuel L Jackson.
,
5558258 He actually is using the Weapons Akimbo and Dual Wielding skills together, meaning he's going to be holding four SMGs.
Wait Octavia? Haha poetry in the making. :-P
An SMG, Wrex? Don't tell me you're going soft! Next you'll be making peace treaties with the turians and naming your kids after salarians! Or are you just too old and feeble for heavy pistols now?
5558258 It was probably for concealment. I imagine he'll bring a larger weapon on the actual mission.
5591285 SMG's in ME tend to kick harder than most Heavy pistols
Found this on EQD today
th03.deviantart.net/fs70/PRE/i/2015/040/3/e/commander_sparkle_by_total_krazen-d8h9zk1.jpg
5608292 That's pretty cool! Almost as badass as Twily in this story.
"Wrex."
"Sparkle."
This is all kinds of perfect! I've already laughed out loud several times and that really doesn't happen that often while reading.
Great job commander.
5556099 Implying that he needed to learn in the first place?
WELL THEN, THATS ONE HELL OF A SAYING
6110586 I was expecting something along the lines of
plain and simple
6186626 Now why would a Krogan waste time saying something when they can just shoot you in the face?
That letter to Wrex at the beginning of the chapter. I can see what a Krogan would see in her lol. Saying she wants to kill him while next hinting she wants to bang him. Exactly what they'd like. What many men would like. A badass.
Also, it is adorably adorkable how Twilight seems to idolize Shepard while using Wrex as a role model. The combination while still remaining our much loved Twilight Sparkle at her core is...heh heh heh.
I force whoever attacked me to submit to me. Like one would an aggressive dog. I've never fought the same person twice outside of spars thanks to that. I've never lost, either, because I just have to be significantly more violent than them but remain tightly controlled. Wild violence is intimidating, but controlled, efficient, ruthless violence coldly delivered is downright terrifying. So I do that.
6110586
Indeed. Straight to the point and very hard to refute.
Lolwutthefuk
This is the third of your stories I'm reading. After one that's very dark and one that ranges between mildly comedic and highly contemplative, this is quite unlike what I expected, but I find myself highly amused to say the least ...
biotic
Wrex is Tia's favorit Booty Call
I stand in awe here. I was thinking myself a great random creator, but this is just busting my guts from amusment
9753083
Name or link?
8948810
Wrex has Sunbutt on speed booty call
7560512
Nice logic if it works i guess
6515321
A shotgun fully unloaded say more than thousand words
6110586
Catchy, need to remember it.
5591285
HA! I can see a Krogan say that, before getting headbutted into Submission.
5562139
Perfection ♡
5559842
You have me in tears. I love it!
5558826
A sniper a Tank and a flanking runner. Good tactic!
5556128
I can't belive it took me to 2021 to find this Gem It's Epic
I really want to see how this Twilight response to the changeling invasion and Tirek.
11124240
HA-HAAA! Moving target practice! Keep em coming, anything below 100 dead targets is only warm up.
Seriously ever counted how many enemys Shepard kills in a singel mission? When the Campaign is over the numbers of personaly shot to death enemys is enough to build a Castle out of the Corpses...
7560512
you would be a dead corpse around where I lived.
And they have somehow avoided leave evidence that links them to several cases of breaking and entering... pretty well done for a bunch of talentless musicians