• Member Since 20th Sep, 2011
  • offline last seen Saturday


Hi, I enjoy reading a lot of the fanfics on this sight, and attempting to write my own. Thoughts and criticism is always welcomed!


Being a dragon means you live long. Having friends means they'll pass away before you do, Not wanting the burden of outliving others, Cinder is constantly on the move. Too restless to settle down in a far off land, Cinder wanders Equestria searching for something that will put his mind at rest, until an encounter with a grey mare shows him the other side of the horizon.

Chapters (3)
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Comments ( 13 )

Nice. But I think you wrote too much dialogue and too little action. Overall it's good fanfic, but what interest me most when I'm reading is conflict. Maybe he'll meet group of ponies who'll run from him but one will stand and he'll help her - then others, thinking he wants to eat their companion will come back... well, you see where I'm going with it. Moar misunderstanding, issues with him being a BIG SCARY DRAGON and stuff like that.

28789 First off, I would like you thank you for your opinion, it is very much appreciated! I do agree that this definitely needed more action and hopefully I remember that next time there will be a conversation. With your suggestion with conflict: I see where your coming from and it probably would make the story more interesting, though I originally wanted it to go in another direction, I will take your suggestion to heart. I wish you a great day, and thank you for taking an interest in my story! :heart:

♫♥I look forward to reading what happens next in your story♥♪

I'm commenting because I don't want to have to see "last comment - 10 weeks ago".


Well, I just thought this was a good way to let you know that I plan on reading your story, and I'll help you with critiques as much as I possibly can.

Just a heads-up, I suppose.



Thanks, your support means the world to me. If ya need me for anything at all feel free to PM me. Best wishes!

Wow! Moar dragon and Derpy... and Dogs! yeaaah!

Your sentence structure could certainly use a bit of work... I'd be happy to help you some time.

Ah, so this is an extremely old story...
Heh, you seem to have the same problem I have! No reason for hiatus, but there it is.
Nice story, at any rate. What errors there are in this story aren't big enough to prevent understanding and enjoyment of the events.

1220679 Thanks for these insightful comments, and hopefully chapters will churn out on a more frequent occasion.

Likewise from me. I really need to get back in the game...

1220695 You and me both, you and me both.

Why does this get so little attention? Seriously, it's written better then half the crud I come across. I eagerly await your next chapter, friend. :twilightsmile:

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