Cooking Roach

by Bucking Nonsense

Recipe Six: Just Desserts

"And that's how it happened."

Sombra chuckled as Rochelle finished the story. The two were still sitting at Sombra's table at Le Couteau Doré. It had taken the better part of an hour to relay to the former tyrant the full story of her becoming a chef at a five star restaurant, but he'd been more than willing to listen. He'd asked a few questions here and there, mainly for the purposes of clarification. He freely admitted that his knowledge of the particulars of changeling culture, history, and anatomy was somewhat lacking, but Rochelle didn't mind explaining. Not too long ago, she would have kept her mouth shut, but by now, with the CPA (Changeling Protection Act) going strong, everything that she'd relayed to Sombra was common knowledge amongst ponykind.

"An interesting story," Sombra said, nodding. "It matches with what I read in your file earlier today."

This was another one of those times when eyebrows would have been useful. "If you already knew the story," Rochelle asked, a little bit confused, "then why did you want me to tell it to you?"

Sombra chuckled, then said, "Well, I predate the invention of 'files', so, while I do find them quite useful at times, I prefer to get the story direct from the source when possible. Ink and paper can only tell me so much."

Rochelle, now a little suspicious, asked, "And why, pray tell, were you reading my file?"

With a smirk, Sombra said, "I think you can guess."

While she may have been a changeling, Rochelle was perfectly capable of putting two and two together. And no, the answer wasn't 'twenty-two'. "Celestia asked you to check in on me," Rochelle guessed, "because she'd heard that my job was at risk because of Toque Blanche's shenanigans."

"Precisely," Sombra said, smiling. He did have a nice smile, Rochelle had to admit. "Celestia suspected that something was going on, but she was uncertain if it was because someone was against a changeling working in a gourmet restraunt, or if there might be another motive. She was certain that it wasn't because of something you were doing wrong. Either way, as head of the Bureau of Changeling Affairs, it fell on my lap. I could have passed it off to somepony else at the office, but since you're a bit of a celebrity, I felt that this required a personal touch." After a moment, the former tyrant admitted, "Besides, I've always had a fondness for those who began with nothing and made their way into a high position through their own hard work and dedication..."

Was it Rochelle's imagination, or was Sombra blushing slightly when he'd admitted that?

"Well," Rochelle admitted, her own cheeks coloring a bright blue as she blushed, "I'm glad you came by. If you hadn't, I might have ended up getting thrown out of here, through no fault of my own." She'd heard rumors that Sombra had been put in charge of some sort of government agency after turning himself over to the princesses, but the BCA? That came as a bit of a surprise...

Sombra, his expression still cheerful, asked, "So, how are Nuisance and Candy Floss?"

Rochelle, grinning, decided to poke a little bit at the former tyrant, even if it was not a wise thing to do in most situations. "No files on them?"

With a shrug, Sombra said, "There might be, but I didn't feel it necessary to pursue them. They weren't exactly relevant to this case."

Nodding, the changeling said, "Well, Nuisance is coming along nicely. She's still a little troublemaker, but she's calming down a bit. The child psychologists had a field day when her story came to light, but they couldn't find a thing wrong with her. Changeling 'parent' or not, she's no different from any griffin chick her age."

Nodding, Sombra said, "That's good to hear. And Candy?"

Chuckling, Rochelle said, "Well, she and Stag Beetle hit it off, even if their first date had a few problems. Long story, and not exactly 'relevant to this case'. Long story short, they're both engaged, and Stag's planning on undergoing 'ponyfication' the same time I am. They plan on getting married the next day."

"That's good," Sombra said, chuckling. "You'll be happy to hear that Mustard Seed and his wife are doing well. She was able to get slipped into the last mass 'ponyfication', as you called it, three weeks ago. She's adjusting well, and they plan on starting a family in the near future."

Smiling, Rochelle giggled, then said, "Those two had a rough time of it, from what they told me. After all the problems they went through, I'm glad that they both got a happy ending." Rochelle had been given a chance at sliding into that sudden vacancy, but she and Cicada, Mustard's wife, had talked it over, and Rochelle had decided that it would be best if Cicada went first. After all, Rochelle didn't have any marriage prospects yet, and she still had a ways to go before she was ready for the big change. Cicada, on the other hoof, was more than ready for her own little bundle of joy.

With a nod, the unicorn said, "Indeed. Saffron Spice is doing well, although he's less than pleased about having lost his position as a gourmet chef. Even with a royal pardon, few ponies want to be served by somepony who has admitted to poisoning someone's food. Still, he was able to get a job at a local cooking school, and is busy teaching the next generation of chefs."

"I'd heard about that," Rochelle said with a shrug. While she'd agreed that, if Candy wasn't going to hold a grudge, then Rochelle would let the matter drop, that didn't mean that she was all that pleased with Saffron. Grief or not, that didn't fully excuse his actions. Still, if everypony else was willing to forgive him, she supposed she'd give him the benefit of the doubt. Besides, if he ended up doing something similar in the future, Rochelle knew exactly where Saffron Spice lived...

Sombra, as if he could read her mind, raised an eyebrow and asked, "You don't approve?"

With a shrug, Rochelle admitted, "Well, all of the good ponies have decided to give him another chance, so I can't argue with that. In fact, even the good changelings decided to do so. But," and here, Rochelle frowned, uncomfortable with admitting this out loud, "I guess I'm not a 'good' changeling: If the decision was up to me, I'd have thrown him in the dungeon, and thrown away the key. And... well, if Celestia and Luna hadn't been there, I might have been tempted to give him a much more literal mouth full of fire." It's a terrible thing to admit that you seriously considered hospitalizing somepony, but...

Sombra, sighing, said, "I can sympathize. But, the important thing is, you chose not to." With a shrug, the tyrant admitted, "Good and bad are, in some cases, extremely relative terms. While it could be argued that changelings were the bad guys in the invasion, it doesn't examine the issue from both sides: After all, it was a case of a species desperately trying to obtain enough food to keep all members of their race fed, something that changelings are having a hard time doing these days."

Rochelle sighed, but otherwise kept quiet. This was a conversation she'd had before with others. Thankfully, Sombra was taking the side Rochelle normally would have, that the invasion was necessary for the survival of changelingkind. Still, there was the opposing viewpoint...

Changelings were now doing extremely well in Equestria, so well that it was rumored that many changelings who had actually been launched away with the queen were immigrating here in search of a better life. It was unknown whether Queen Chrysalis approved or not, but she wasn't doing anything to stop it. So, couldn't changelings have started doing this a long time ago?

Surprisingly, Sombra then interrupted her train of thought, stating, "But while good and bad are mostly relative, the important thing is that, when we can clearly see what is right and what is wrong, we choose what is clearly the right thing to do. You might not think yourself a 'good' changeling, Rochelle, but you're definitely not a bad one."

Blushing brightly at the compliment, Rochelle nodded, and said, "Thank you, Sombra." A thought came to Rochelle, and after a moment, she asked, "I don't want to pry, but I can't help but wonder... What happened to you? I mean, I heard that you'd reformed, but nopony has come out with the reason why, or how." After all, that little speech was the last thing most ponies, or bugs, would expect to hear from King Sombra, the pony they held up as the definitive example to prove that not all ponies are good...

The reformed tyrant, looking very uncomfortable, said, "Well, it's a bit of an involved story, and... very personal. I'd rather not take up too much of your time today. I... might be willing to tell you another time."

That was about what Rochelle had expected. There had been rumors, and some of them whispered that Sombra had gone to Tartarus, literally, and come back, desperate to redeem himself, having found out that not only was he mortal, but that something truly unpleasant, and inescapable, awaited him if he continued his evil ways. While that sounded like an exaggeration to Rochelle, the fact that Cerberus itself was spotted not that long ago in Ponyville certainly meant that something like Tartarus was real, even if it might be nothing like what the legends described. Still, coming back to life after being blasted to fragments by the power of love and hope had definitely done something to Sombra...

Nodding, Rochelle said, "Well, I'll take a rain check on that, then." Rising up from the table, Rochelle said, "Well, it has been a pleasure meeting you today, Sombra. I want to thank you again for helping me." Extending a hoof, the changeling said, "If you're ever looking for a good meal, feel free to come back, any time."

Sombra, surprisingly, took her hoof, and kissed it. Possibly due to his upbringing in a different time period, and indeed a different culture, he didn't seem to have any problem doing this, but the contact caused Rochelle to blush furiously. As a changeling who, until now, hadn't really even considered a romantic relationship with a pony, the surprisingly tender gesture caught her completely off guard...

"You are quite welcome," Sombra said, smiling, "And I will definitely take you up on that, sometime soon."

Comments

[Smashing Skunk53]

Damn...Sombra is smooth like carapace.

[Dragonslayer Ornstein]

Oooooohh~ I smell romance in the air!~~~

[dadab22]

I still don't like the changeling into pony thing. It really removes the whole purpose of the struggle to become accepted.

[Lag Incarnate]

static.fjcdn.com/comments/3830518+_0b06d50ec9b00bb860dceedaa126d0c0.jpg

[PinkiePieFox]

Awww snap!!!

[PhycoKrusk]

4227686
I can agree with you on that. It was bound to come up, given this is a weld where magic to change one creature into another creature not only exists, but is relatively easy to come across.

I think that might be why of all these changelings, Cricket is my favorite. He’s not concerned with being a pony, and isn’t even overly concerned with being accepted. He wants to be a knight and care for others around him in anyway he can, and the payoff for that is irrelevant as long as he can keep them safe.

(Mole Cricket! FUCK YEAH!)

[Christs Disciple]

Well, that is nice way to end a story. With romance!

[Mangaman 47]

That was brilliant, but on a side note, I would love to see the story of Mustard Seed and Cicada

[Bucking Nonsense]

4228970

That day will come. I can only keep seven stories going at a time, though, so it will have to sit on the back burner for a little bit. I want to get a chapter for each of the "Five Changelings In Equestria" series before I get another one going.

[Phenoix12]

I liked almost everything about this story. The one thing that I dislike is the 'turning changelings into ponies' thing going on. Just feels... wrong. But it's your verse and you can do what ever you want to do with it.

[Bucking Nonsense]

4227686
4231014
Well, some of you may remember the original Cricket-Verses stories, before the big reboot. One of the major parts of that series was that changelings weren't always changelings. Now, I'm not going to spoil things for the reboots, but I'd just like to point out that, while I haven't stated yet that is still a thing, I haven't said it wasn't, either. It may take a different form than the pre-reboot, but what happens may surprise you. Let's just see how things play out, eh?

[WorldWalker128]

The reformed tyrant, looking very uncomfortable, said, "Well, it's a bit of an involved story, and... very personal. I'd rather not take up too much of your time today. I... might be willing to tell you another time."

His most likely story, lol

[MaruTheWonderbolt]

4237972
But...but that would be Sombra Pie, not Sombrelle.

[bigmacattack82]

That silly individual that down voted this is obviously a speciesist.

[knetch]

i am not to confortable with the whole ponyfication, personaly if i was a changeling i wouldn't go through that, but still the story is very enjoyable.
keep them coming.

[Dream Bolt]

4331190 Yeah, it always amuse me when I see a story with lots of upvotes and then, standing there all by itself, is a single downvote. No comments, no morally questionable things in the story to merit it, nothing that wouldn't be at least mostly canon... and yet, there that downvote sits. It makes you wonder who that one individual is, and why on Celestia's green earth they didn't like a story like this.

And now, about the story.
I must say, I like the twist. Rarely do you see a story about a changeling which doesn't have to do with either (1) redemption (2) combat (3) shipping. Nice little story with a pinch of a hidden wisdom which I have never seen in other stories: the changelings are not forbidden as a race, and it is the poor leaders, not the individual citizens, which make he bad decisions. I think that it fit in very well with Equestria's "love and kindness" beliefs. On a side note, I have always loves shows like Chopped or Iron Chef, so I couldn't help but enjoy this. Good work. Keep on cookin!

Oh, and it looks like Sombra took the phrase "kiss the cook" all too literally.

[Evergrand Storyteller]

Shokugeki no Pony

[ReflectingScore]

Grr, should of read the other story first...

[MasterNotWriter6626]

4623550 thank you for warning me, I'll read that one first.

[ReflectingScore]

4706137
No prob. I mean, you could read this one first... But the end chapter doesn't make a lot of sense unless you read the first story.

[ShadowCloud]

the fact that Cerberus itself was spotted not that long ago in Ponyville certainly meant that something like Tartarus was real

Ok I have to ask because I have seen this in at least 50 or 60 fanfics but was this actually in an episode or something and if not why is this a thing?

[Bucking Nonsense]

4896521
It's About Time is the episode with Cerberus. Twilight's Kingdom confirms Tartarus is a real place, although it is a prison, not a kind of hell (Although it could be a hellish prison.)

[ShadowCloud]

4896805 Huh I actually can't remember that episode. Which season was it in? I know it wasn't in season 4.

[Bucking Nonsense]

4896970
Season Two. Episode Three, I think. Twilight Sparkle's Crazy Face came from that episode.

[ShadowCloud]

4896999 I actually just went back and watched it, it was actually episode 20 of season 2, and I really didn't watch that episode when it first aired because I wasn't a brony then but when I went back and saw there were 2 Twilights I said "Nope this is only going to end badly." I may be a brony, but there's some episodes I won't watch.

[Bucking Nonsense]

4897027
Ah, right, I got the numbering confused. Episode 3 was Lesson Zero, and it had twilight's crazy face. It's About Time was about receiving a message from the future... well, future twilight TRIED to deliver it, anyways

[DanielLC]

4231412

Does that mean there's a spell that can turn ponies into changelings? I'd go for it.

I wouldn't be against the spell to turn changelings into ponies. If it's possible for you to be able to choose your race, then you should be allowed to. But I still think it's sad so many of them are doing it. If changelings are some kind of artificial race, that doesn't change anything.

[Iron Comet]

Definatly a nice little backstory and told very well!

[Bucking Nonsense]

4928082
Yes, really. I've been doing it since "Your Fangs Are Showing", my very first story. You can't tell me it wouldn't fit with the tone of the show

[Moongaze14]

I love the ending.

[nocara]

Great story :) as always love your changelings

[Tallinu]

For some reason I can't ' reply' to the specific post, but: I agree that the body / buggy substitution works very well for changelings written this way, and I love your take on their backstory / history. It's quite different from the headcanon I've come up with, but it works very well. I can't wait to read the rest of your stories, and for updates to the unfinished ones.

Lest I end this comment with no constructive criticism, i've noticed you use a lot of ellipsis even in narration, sometimes clusters of them in just a few lines. As someone who has to frequently prune back their overabundance in my own work, I feel... not entirely unqualified... to suggest having a slightly closer look at any paragraph which contains them to see if they're really needed or disrupt the smooth reading or tone (what I like to call ellipsis trains, or multiple complete sentences ended with them, are particularly recurring foes of mine).

[Tallinu]

Apparently RD snuck into my last comment for a cameo, and I haven't a clue how... It looked fine before I hit the button. But i'm typing on a phone's browser, so who knows? XD (Won't let me edit it either.)

[Bucking Nonsense]

5246441

[YetAnotherDiscord]

Great story!
Only one thing: I personally don´t like that Sombra knew it all along - it is somewhat anticlimactic. Not bad, just...
anticlimactic.
Everything else in this story is just epic.

Also, after reading this story, I founded a group against food wastage.

[YetAnotherDiscord]

4331190
4387428

Maybe it was a member of this group? Oh, no, they only do it amongst their own stories. Good.

[PinkiePieFox]

5555759 lol, That would be horriorfying to ponies....

[Discord_Lexia]

4928432 Is that Sombie a subtle reference to The King is Dead, long Live the Emperor?

[Slavenger Karl]

Damn, this could get a really nice sequel expecially now we know the Restaurant customs of Canterlot and have Masala's spicy flank as the oppsition. Hell, she might be related to Saffron Spice and have a gruge...

The theme: Rarity and Pinks fook'd up the fancy food industry after what they done in that episode way back. The times are changeing and what better cook is to adapt to the ever-shifting customs than a COCKROACH! THOSE THINGS WILL SURVIVE EVRYTHING!!!

[erictheblue]

5727978 i think it's a reference to a different one of his stories, "saving Sombra".

[GardenData61371]

This is the best story I've ever read.

[JazzyWaffles]

Great story but as a solo work the Sombra stuff is confusing.

[Asolem2]

"And that's how it happened."

Sombra chuckled

Wait what?

While she may have been a changeling, Rochelle was perfectly capable of putting two and two together. And no, the answer wasn't 'twenty-two'. 

Wait WHAT, my whole life has been nothing but lies, lies I tell you