Chapter 8: The Last Shame
The Cutie Mark Crusaders reluctantly returned to Ponyville, but were relieved that no one was angry with them any longer. Apparently, they might have figured out on their own that they never irritated the Timberwolves to begin with. But there still remained the question of who might have. Who could have possibly wanted the Cutie Mark Crusaders in so much trouble that the denizens of Ponyville would be driven to resolve to anger and hatred? In any case, Applejack, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash were glad to have their sisters back. Granny Smith and Rarity's parents decided that since Applejack and Rarity respectively were just totally upset to put the whole matter behind them, provided that the fillies would be treated somewhat better than just mischief makers. During the same day the Cutie Mark Crusaders returned, Applejack, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash decided to confront Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon.
"What?" snapped Diamond Tiara. "Us?! You think we irked those Timberwolves so that they would run loose through Ponyville and those stupid blank flanks would take the heat for it?!"
"You stop that this very instant!" snarled Applejack. "Mah sister isn't stupid and if you keep callin' her a blank flank, ah swear ah'm gonna talk to yer dad about your inexcusable behavior, young missy!"
"Try it!" sneered Diamond Tiara. "My daddy is the richest pony in Ponyville! He has friends in high places!"
"And don't think you can intimidate us with that trash talk!" warned Rarity. "We are friends with Princess Celestia herself! And I have friends in Canterlot!"
"Not to mention, the Riches are friends of the Apple family," Applejack added on. "So if you keep on insultin' Apple Bloom like no tomorrow, yer gonna find yerself addin' salt to that wound you've already created. And if yer folks can't teach y'all any manners, then maybe they just might have to go to drastic measures with y'all."
"And if you insult my little Sweetie Belle, you'll have to answer to me!" said Rarity.
"And if you even dare to poke fun at Scootaloo just because she can't fly..." warned Rainbow Dash. "Well... I'm gonna give you both a two-second head start and then I can't be responsible for what's gonna happen after that."
"We're still talkin' to yer parents," said Applejack to both Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon. "They're not gonna be happy when they learned what you two did to our little sisters."
"We didn't do it!" shouted Diamond Tiara. "Do you think we want to go near any Timberwolves?"
"I would," said Rainbow Dash. "Well... but I wouldn't do it to frame anypony or something stupid like that."
"Okay, so you didn't do it," said Applejack. "But who did?" That's when Twilight and Fluttershy stepped forward.
"Well, there is undeniable evidence that points to Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon," Twilight admitted. "I did once overhear that they were going to have a party. And I'll bet it was because the Cutie Mark Crusaders had been exiled from Ponyville."
"Maybe," sneered Diamond Tiara. "But like I said, we didn't frame those Stupid Mark Crusaders." Five of the six ponies got angry at them, hearing this, but Fluttershy was in thought.
"Wait a minute," said Fluttershy. "I just remembered... That same day the Timberwolves ran loose, Angel was late for his meal. And I know how fussy he gets when I'm late with his meals sometimes, so I didn't know why Angel would... be late himself... Angel... Late for his meal... Angel..." The other five ponies looked back at Fluttershy, whose eyes suddenly widened. "Oh, no..."
Back at Fluttershy's cottage, Angel was relaxing on the couch, eating a salad with cucumbers and carrot slices. He seemed rather content, but it was about something apparently. That's when the door flung open and there stood an angry and disappointed Fluttershy, along with Applejack, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash, startling Angel.
"Angel Bunny," said Fluttershy. "You... are in so much trouble." Angel's ears drooped, realizing that he had been caught.
In a flashback scene, Angel was seen in the Everfree Forest, making faces at a group of Timberwolves. The Timberwolves got riled up with rage and chased after Angel, who was far too fast for them. After the Timberwolves lost sight of Angel, they howled and cursed, which led to their unnatural behavior of barging into Ponyville, taking out their frustration on whatever they could sink their teeth into.
"Why did you do it, Angel?" Fluttershy asked. Angel just frowned. And then, Fluttershy understood everything.
"What?" said Fluttershy, exasperated. "For that?!"
"You gotta be kiddin' me," said Applejack.
"I'm so disappointed in you, Angel," scolded Fluttershy. "I already forgave those sweet little angels for that and they certainly didn't deserve what you did to them!"
A big metal cage was placed around Angel's little house. He still had plenty of space to move around outside, but he was now forbidden from going anywhere on the chance he would be all too mischievous, including the comfort of Fluttershy's cottage. So now, Fluttershy had to pass food through the narrow spaces of the cage to feed him. Angel begged, pleaded, and cried, even banging on the metal bars, and although it pained Fluttershy to see him this way, acting all pathetic, she was still able to keep her hoof down rather firmly.
"I'm sorry, Angel," she spoke through tears. "But it's for your own good. Those poor, sweet little angels. I've seen them recently. They may not ever be the same again... living their lives... in fear."
Sadly, and sorry to say, Fluttershy was quite right. In the following days, the Cutie Mark Crusaders would wake up each morning, but they would be scared and shaken up. Not having cutie marks made them victims of Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon. And now they were too afraid to do any more crusading, under the impression that all the unintentional trouble they caused led others to scorn and hate them. The memories of how badly they were treated as Gabby Gums came back to haunt them. And since Angel was the true perpetrator behind their exile, they believed that anyone could be out to get them for almost anything.
Most days, they would leave their homes only to get together in the clubhouse, using the shed as sort of a sanctuary to get away from everything. But they also knew that Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon knew where the clubhouse was and many times, the three fillies huddled together, scared that they would be harmed. Their fear was sometimes so bad, they would cry together, and when they did, Applejack overheard them, feeling sorry. Granny Smith would just give Applejack the occasional evil eye, because the farm pony had a hand to play in all this. And not just for part of the exile, but also while they were Gabby Gums. Now, Applejack and Big Macintosh were forced to live with themselves for what they did. Rarity wanted nothing more than to hold and cuddle the three sorry little fillies and win back their trust, but in the end, it would be Fluttershy who would do that. Once in a while, Rainbow Dash was able to convince Scootaloo to come visit her in her cloud home. During their time together, they would reconcile, little by little, as Rainbow told Scootaloo just how much having a huge fan meant to her, especially when the Mare-Do-Well incident practically left her with nothing.
One time, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon decided to take full advantage of the Cutie Mark Crusaders, but Fluttershy was at the clubhouse visiting at the time, so instead, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon got the full receiving end of Fluttershy's signature stare instead. Sympathizing the little fillies, Applejack started serving them lunch and allowed them to eat in the clubhouse. Meanwhile Twilight was talking with Cheerilee about what had become of the Cutie Mark Crusaders and poor Cheerilee was crestfallen, even coming to tears.
"Those poor dears," murmured Cheerilee. "Do you think they need a bodyguard?"
"I don't know," said Twilight sadly. "Maybe. I'm so sorry, Cheerilee. My friends and I are to blame... somewhat."
"It's all right, Twilight. But I just never thought things would be so bad. All they wanted were their cutie marks. And they were picked on for not having them. It's very sad. Well, something has to be done. School will start again in about three weeks. But I'm sure that they'll be too scared to even attend."
"Well, I don't think Fluttershy will hesitate to help watch over them," assured Twilight. "She's tougher than she looks."
One day, Fluttershy decided to go to Canterlot for a visit. But the real reason she went was to see an old friend, so she went to the Canterlot Gardens. And there was Discord, still imprisoned in stone for his deceptiveness. Fluttershy looked up at Discord, greatly saddened and brokenhearted by the pose he was frozen in. But that wasn't all. Something else caught her eye. Looking closer at his face, she was wide-eyed when she saw one tear running from the statue's regretful eyes down his face. Fluttershy could hold back her tears no longer. She cried for Discord. And she also cried for the Cutie Mark Crusaders.
THE END
Mares in Black
performed by Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo
Whoo...
Here come the mares in black
It's the M.I.B.'s, uh, here come the M.I.B.'s
Here come the mares in black (Mares in black)
They won't let you remember
Nah, nah, nah
The sweet little angels dress in black, remember that
Just in case we come face to face and make contact
The title held by us, M.I.B.
Means what you think you saw, what you didn't see
So don't blink, think what you want, but it's now gone
Black suit with the black Ray Ban's on
We walk in shadow, we move in silence
Guard against interplanetary violence
We were once on a Cutie Mark Crusader's list
Now we straight don't exist, no names and no hoof prints
Saw something strange, watch your back
Cause you never quite know where the M.I.B. is at
Uh, and...
Here come the mares in black (Mares in black)
Equestrian defenders (uh oh, uh oh)
Here come the mares in black (Mares in black)
They won't let you remember (won't remember)
Uh uh, uh uh
Now from the deepest of the darkest of night
On the horizon, bright light in the sight tight
Cameras zoom on the impending doom
But then like boom, black suits fill the room up
With the quickness, talk to the witnesses
Hypnotizer, neuralizer
Vivid memories turn to fantasies
Ain't no M.I.B.'s, can I please
Do what we say, that's the way we're kickin'
You know what I mean?
I see my noisy chicken get lickin' on ya
We're your first, last and only line of defense
Against the worst scum of the universe
So don't fear us, cheer us
If you ever get near us, don't jeer us, we're the fearless
M.I.B.'s freezing up all the flack
(What's that stand for?) Mares in Black
Uhh, M, m, m...
The mares in black...
(Uh uh uh...)
The mares in black...
(Uh uh uh, ah ah ah)
Let me see you just bounce it with me, just bounce it with me
Just bounce it with me, come on
Let me see you just slide with me, just slide with me
Just slide with me, come on
Let me see you take a walk with me, just walk with me
Take a walk with me, come on
And make your neck work
Now freeze...
Here come the mares in black (Mares in black)
Equestrian defenders (ooh, ooh)
Right on, right on
Here come the mares in black (Mares in black)
They won't let you remember (ohhh no)
Alright, check it, let me tell you this in closing
I know we might seem imposing
But trust me if we ever show in your section
Believe me, it's for your own protection
Cause we see things you don't need to see
And we're in places you don't have to be
So go with your life, forget that Headless Horse hooey
Show love to the black suit,
Cause that's the mares in, that's the mares in...
Here come the mares in black (here they come)
Equestrian defenders (Equestrian defenders)
Here come the mares in black (ohhh, here they come)
They won't let you remember (won't, let you, remember)
Here come the mares in black (ohhh, here they come)
Equestrian defenders (ohh ohh, ohh ohh, ohh ohh)
Here come the mares in black
They won't let you remember
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- Black Kyurem · 13k words · 17 38 · 2.6k views
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Are you making part 2 of rise of the dark queen?
Damn! New fan fiction? I was gonna read Sister Dash next, but after reading the summary, I don't want to pass this up!
Onto the first chapter...
hmm to read or not to read that is the question.
This was quite... Interesting, there were points where I wanted to bang my fists onto the desk I am sitting at and then there were points that I wanted nothing more to do than bury my face in my arms and cry, but there were moments I thought to be funny, not many but they were there.
That was a great story. Why would the CMC still be afraid weren't their names cleared?
3436489 He did in the series, and this is just fan fiction.
3436591 Uh... You did read the genre tags, did you not?
3436173 Why should there be a Part 2?
3436717 Black Kyurem should have had that explained. The thing is, from their point of view, anything could happen to them simply because they don't have their cutie marks.
3437710 Buddy, you are wrong on two counts:
1. For starters, if you think "Sister Dash" is that bad, go read this story (all five current chapters) and then get back to Black Kyurem on harshness.
2. In the episode "Ponyville Confidential", Apple Bloom was as good as disowned when Applejack and Big Mac found out about Gabby Gums. Big Mac even told all three of them to 'go away'. In a nutshell, they were 'banished'.
You should choose your words more carefully before calling out Black Kyurem.
this is a bittersweet ending but im alright with this. Sure Discord is defeated and CMC are back in Ponyville but at what Price. Anyways this story reminded me of this Fic where the CMC are ran out of town.
3438260 Yes, Black Kyurem fully intended to give this story a bittersweet ending all along. So thanks.
3438260 No different than in "Ponyville Confidential".
3437453 I did read the tags it's just that I wasn't expecting it to be like that.
3438312 I know right I even started a ponyville confidential Call out Group and Cutie Bloom is one of the fics in the group.
3438361 Oh? That group? That was you? Oh. Fancy that.
Black Kyurem, once again you never disappoint. IMO this is your second best story yet (1st being A Canterlot Wedding: Aftermath).
I'll admit, it was off to a quick start, but the rest of the story flowed pretty well. The sequence at Applewood was an enjoyable read, the CMC refusing their sisters' and calling them out was a very pleasing turn of events and the reveal of Discord's true nature and Fluttershy's reaction was truly a tear jerker. For a breif time, I actually did believe it was Discord all along, the twist with Angel at the end was very surprising (that guy holds one heck of grudge), and the subsequent aftermath to that is both saddening and satisfying:
- Saddening because of the crusaders' dilema being perfectly realistic; suffering through two traumatic experiences in quite a short time has that effect, especially when you're a child.
- Satisfying because the Mane 6 FINALLY get their just desserts. From what I've gathered, Applejack (and probably Big Mac as well) holds pride above all else, even family; and seeing them both getting hated for it after such a long time is the icing on the cake for me.
The cliffhanger ending was also well used, and even if you don't make a sequel, leaving the events at such a sad moment lets the readers decide for themselves what will happen next.
Though there were one or two moments where I was a bit confused:
- Why did the CMC return to Ponyville when they were happy in Applewood? Were they convinced? Did they want to call out the town for their actions?
- How much time passed before the crusaders were confronted by their sisters in Applewood? As it's impossible to cast, shoot and complete a mega blockbuster in a matter of days.
Just a few nitpicks, but still a fantastic read and I'm looking forward to seeing more from you in the future.
3438661 Well, wow! Thank you. Now, Black Kyurem might be able to answer your questions.
- The CMC returned to Ponyville because Director Q was no longer directing any films and because the whole 'legendary mark' thing was just a prank, the CMC pretty much had no more of a reason to stay at Applewood.
- It is also impossible to do even a short film last minutes in a single day, but apparently it's possible in Pokemon Black 2 and White 2. Deriving from this concept, it was within a couple of days that "Mares In Black" was completed. So the next time that doesn't make sense, just remember. It's only fan fiction!
3438801
I just have this weird obsession with getting facts correct, even on things I didn't do myself... sometimes I go a little overboard
The ending was also extra saddening for me, because I was listening to this at the time:
3438896 Black Kyurem admits that it's not that hard to see right through Director Q.
Interesting choice of music, though.
3440993 Nope. No outside influence, unfortunately. But was there any when Applejack and Big Mac practically kicked Apple Bloom out of their lives?
3441011 Keep reading... Heh heh heh...
3441122 Oh? Really? Is that so?
3441180 I would totally worship Dark Queen and follow her anywhere. I would be her Dark Acolyte. (As long as she lets me see the CMCs movies.)
3441287 Fascinating...
To be honest I dislike the ending. It makes you feel as though the CMC would eventually separate and never receive their marks out of fear of trying to do so.
3447887 At least you would know who blame for it.
3448749 Yeah, the author.
3448786
3447887 lets face it this is what I See as a Darker Version of Cutie Bloom. But we have to remember its just a Fic not to be taken seriously.
3449616 Not my fault Kyurem asked for that.
3449622
3479876 Makes Black Kyurem wonder if the whole "Deal with it" thing with shades is ever to be taken seriously.
3449616 Right. Taking fanfics seriously is brony business and an uptight, drama-inducing brony Black Kyurem ain't.
When Granny Smith gives the "evil eye," is it something like this…?
3494601 Maaaybe.
images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130127182116/mlp/images/a/a9/Granny_Smith_gives_Spike_the_evil_eye_S03E11.png
Only because this probably wouldn't cut it.
Well im going to just say it now this and other Fics inspired me on a Fic idea as alternate ending to Ponyville Confidential where the CMC trick diamond into signing a confession letter to admit she was the mastermind behind Gabby gums and Blackmailing the crusader's to invade Ponyvilles privacy. when its published all of ponyville realizes that there were Fools and tries to apologize for there actions but the CMC call them out for being hypocrites and decided to leave town to find there special talents elsewhere . I would say more but I should start writing than saying.
( I know its a bad Fic idea but just can stop thinking about a alternate ending to Ponyville Confidential)
3519333 Hm... Part of that doesn't make much sense. Black Kyurem doesn't think that the CMC would call out the town for turning against them and run away if they exposed Diamond Tiara. It's not a "bad" fanfic idea, mind you, but it's just a little mind-boggling, that's all.
3519355 well the idea was Well a hate Fic against the town from that episode but I could refine it to be a little less hateful.
3519364 Ah, so you're thinking of a fanfic with "hate" as a focal point? Well, can't say Black Kyurem hasn't seen any of those around these parts. Heh heh heh...
3519333
That sounds like a brilliant idea to me. I'll be sure to read it once it's up.
3534033 Your going to wait a long time im thinking of changing it where instead of the CMC Calling Ponyville out for what they done I decided to have the crusaders be scarred by how the town treated them after that gabby gums mess they run away out of fear.
Also most of my time is spent Trying to catch up on the show and Playing Pokémon X ( yea I still play that franchise )
( I don't know if that's more believable but I know its less harsh than what I originally had in mind)
3568951
Either way, they're both good ideas, "the CMC leave (whether out of fear or spite), and ponyville learns a lesson the hard way".
3569837 it makes me wonder Why hasn't anyone thought of this idea before.
3569918
I have searched head to tow around the internet to find soneone who has. Many have good ideas, but no actual stories.
I have my own idea myself, though it's a lot more deep than, "the CMC leave and ponyville learns a lesson the hard way". I've been meaning to start it for some time now, and I will once I've finished college.
My idea is this:
I'm planning for this to be a coming of age story, with some romance thrown in, a bit of "Slice of Life", and a lot of action and drama. I'm actually planning this to be a trilogy. I have many ideas and concepts, it's getting them down into words that I'm having trouble with.
The reason I've said so much, is so you know that I'm not just someone who throws out an idea and then ditches it. This is something I AM going to work on.
3570188 nice idea so no happy ending for yours eh I expected Diamond tiara getting punished or the town Learning the truth about her blackmailing oh well.
3570238
It doesn't end there, it follows the crusaders through their training and different assignments for the underground. Plus, Diamond Tiara will be a much bigger threat than the simple bully with power.
3572756 okay now I know why that idea bothered me its not a Fic I would read but others would.
3572756 Oh? Diamond Tiara a bigger threat? Wait till my next fanfic.
3651422 Yep. Never get these things right the first time. Black Kyurem will take care of it.