Author: Milky Way
Prompt: Secret
Everyone knew Pinkie Pie valued secret keeping. Loose lips sink friendships, she would say.
That's why, when Pinkie had asked for the third time just why exactly, Twilight kept staring at her, nothing was said. As Pinkie asked various improbable possibilities, Twilight smiled.
She had a secret, you see. She held this secret very close to her heart, so that it would not get out. Because this secret, this terrible, scary secret, it could hurt.
It could hurt a lot of ponies. She had thought about this secret long and hard, and she knew all of the bad things that could happen if she ever let her secret out.
But at times like this, she wanted to let the secret out. She wanted to tell everyone one around, especially the mare who was currently looking at her, brow wrinkled in worry.
"TwiTwi, are you okay?"
Realizing she had been lost in her thoughts about secrets, Twilight shook her head. "Yes, I'm fine." She looked up into the face of her secret, deep blue eyes showing disbelief. "Can I tell you a secret?"
"Of course. I'm great at keeping secrets. Oh, is it a big secret, or a little secret. Is it a clean one? Because I heard Time Turner tell Rose she was his dirty little secret, and I don't know if I want a dirty secret." Pinkie leaned forward, ears perked in anticipation.
Now that the moment was here, Twilight faltered. She had practiced telling her secret, she had imagined all different ways to say it, but this wasn't one of them. She hadn't even meant to say those words aloud.
But she had. Taking a deep breath, she nodded. "I think I'm in love with you."
Twilight didn't breath. She had let out her secret. The horrible,dangerous secret that could hurt a lot of ponies.
That could hurt her.
That could hurt the pony sitting in front of her, grinning larger than the Cheshire Cat.
"I love you, too." Leaning forward, Pinkie pressed her lips to Twilight's just as she did nothing else. Slowly, carefully.
The kiss lasted less than a second, but Twilight found the time for her eyelids to flutter shut. As Pinkie pulled away, Twilight smiled. She listened to Pinkie talk about how she had wanted to ask Twilight, but was afraid too.
And she realized, the secret hadn't been very bad at all. In fact, the secret was a great one.
Her smile widened as Pinkie scooted closer to her on the couch, and she changed her mind. The secret had been bad, when it had been a secret. But now it wasn't, and it was a good thing.
Sometimes, secrets were meant to be shared.
This one, I just plain really like. No errors to take me out of it, and the prose itself was very nice, and the emotional center and character interaction was sweet, if simplistic. Though if I had to nitpick, I think the word "secret" is repeated a bit much.
3141734 Thank you. I agree, I use secret a bit much, but I don't know how to get around it with they way I've set up the story.
I'm really glad you like this!
I like this one, though I do agree with LDSocrates about "secret" getting repeated too much. Though, I will say this:
I love that. Is it canon, or did you make that up yourself? It's amazing, and such a Pinkie thing to say. I also like how there was a lesson learned. Just like many episodes in the show, a character mistakes something (Twilight thinks she should keep her secret close to her heart and never let it out) and later on realizes what they did wrong and fixes the problem (Twilight realizes "secrets are meant to be shared.") With fanfiction, I think it's a job well-done when you can connect with canon like this, while still making it something that could never be shown on-set. (Too bad. TwiPie would be amazing to see. )
There were some typos here and there, but nothing to be worried about. Keep writing!
3167961 Thank you! Loose lips sink friendships might b canon? I don't properly know. I found a picture of Twi on a sinking ship with that saying a while back, and just felt it fit Pinkie perfectly so I used it. It was supposed to be reminiscent of like WW1 or WW2 posters, I think.
And yeah, I agree about the use of secret. But oh well. As for the typos, I'm going to say a few are probably because I write short writings like this on my tablet. It's just hard to type on sometimes, and them autocorrect likes to correct to things I don't mean...and some were just me.
Anyway, thank you for the comment, I'm glad you like the story.