Luna...

by Discord Kantus

First Date

I walked along the dark street, the disguised Luna beside me. I had an urge to to wrap a wing around her, feel her soft coat against my feathers, and passionately massage her body, but I knew I couldn't. If I messed this up, if Luna hated me, the rest of my life would be empty, meaningless—at least until I found a suitable cliff to jump off of. No, I couldn't afford to advance this too quickly.

"So," I heard a voice whisper. "How long have you wanted this?"

"I...I can't remember. Years, surely. I know it was before I joined the Lunar Guards."

"And how long have you been a guard?"

"Since the moment I came of age. Eight years ago, now."

Luna stopped walking, and I nearly tripped over myself trying to turn around and face her as quickly as possible. "What is it?" I asked.

Luna looked at me. Her eyes had lost the shine they had had since we left the bar, and now were filled with a piercing sadness. "It was that long? For more than eight years serving under me as a Royal Guard, you wanted to ask me on a date so much, yet you never did." The mare hung her head. "That's awful."

"I never really thought about how long it was." I took a few steps towards her. "It was hard. I won't lie and say it wasn't. But I'm here now, alive and well. So let's not dwell on the past, and instead think about now."

"Well, I was planning on asking you about your childhood once we got there, but I guess I'll have to think of something along the way," admitted Luna, straigtening up and starting to walk again.

"You wouldn't want to hear that anyway. It wasn't very interesting, or very pleasant."

"Well, now I'm curious," she replied. "Are you sure you won't tell me?"

"If you really want to hear it. But, it's not a happy story. Maybe some day, but not now."

"Okay. How about this instead?" Luna had a mischevious smile on her face. "I can ask you whatever I want as long as it's not about your childhood. In return, you can ask anything you want. Agreed?"

"Agreed."

---

"Well, we're here," I noted as we arrived at the restaurant. The name was simple, yet elegant; the Canterlot Bistro.

"Ah, yes. Celestia told me about this place. She said they'd give her a discount if she said it was the best place in the city."

"Did she do it?"

"No," Luna chuckled. "But if they offer it to me, I won't be so proper as to refuse."

As we walked through the dark green double doors leading in, I saw the magnificent splendor of the restaurant. The fancily patterned, red velvet floor was carefully trotted on by well-clad ponies holding domes that undoubtedly contained delicious food. The tables had intricately designed tablecloths and candlesticks were lit on every table. I looked down at myself dressed in the armor of a Royal Guard, and then turned to Luna. "Perhaps I should rush back home and get something more appropriate for here, or else they might not let us in."

Luna reached into a pocket of her Royal Attendant's outfit and pulled out a small white card. On it was a picture of Luna undisguised, along with her age, height, weight, and other various things. "I could walk in here naked, and with this ID, they'd still have to seat me, even with Canterlot's strict policies on such things. Celestia permitted leeway for the Elements, but I have no idea how Fleur de Lise gets away with it. The best idea I have is that she bribes the captains with her body."

I immediately began blushing. "You sure we should talk about that here?"

Luna chuckled lightly. "I'm a princess. I can get away with anything short of assault."

"Well, my captain is a mare, and even she starts blushing whenever Fleur's brought up, so-"

"Excuse me, you two, but would you like to sit down?" A white pony, clad in a black and red suit, stood in front of us with a checklist, ready to write down which tables were and weren't taken.

"Yes, we would," answered Luna. "Charge it to this." She held out her ID, and the server's eyes widened.

"Come this way." It sounded like he was trying not to stammer. He turned around and led us to a table at the back of the restaurant, where two menus lay. "I'll be back in a few minutes to take your order."

"So, whatever happened to it being on me?"

"Who pays you?"

"Oh, I see."

After glancing at the menus, I chose a salad comprised mostly of extremely spicy ingredients, while Luna preferred a simple lettuce and tomato mix. We gave our orders to the waiter, then continued our conversation.

"So," Luna whispered. "Since I'm asking questions first, tell me this. Do you really think your female captain gets it on with Fleur?"

I groaned. "Do I have to answer this?"

"Yes, you do. And I can tell if you're lying, so be honest."

"Okay, fine." I paused to take a deep breath. "I absolutely believe they are. Captain Blazer has a picture of Fleur on her desk, and I lost track of how many times she's stared at it and started panting."

Luna chuckled. "Ah, Captain Blazer. Always thought she was a fillyfooler. Hmm, I just thought of a great prank to pull on her. Now, for my next question. What do you think of Fleur?"

After a brief moment to think, I opened my mouth. "She's pretty. She wouldn't have her job if she wasn't. But she can't hold a candle to you, Princess. Even in your disguised form, you are so much more beautiful than she is."

Luna cutely smiled at me. "Thank you. It means a lot to me hear you say that." Glancing over my shoulder, Luna continued. "Okay. I can see the waiter with our meals. Once they arrive, tell me what you would have done if I had rejected you." Luna smirked.

My salad was put down in front of me, and I used my fork to pick up a single pepper and bit into it. After swallowing, I answered. " I would have found a cliff and hurled myself off of it." I looked at my side, then quickly corrected myself. "Wait, no. First I'd find something I could use to hold down my wings, so I couldn't use them."

"What!?" Luna's eyes widened, staring at me over her bowl.

"You said you can tell if I'm lying." I peered over my bowl. "Am I?"

"No... but that makes it much worse! I shouldn't have asked that." Luna looked down at her food.

"It's okay. I've come to terms with it already. You can go back to how you were acting a minute ago, asking questions about sex and planning pranks on lesbian guard captains."

"Ask me something. It'll take my mind off that."

"Okay, then. What were you doing while on the moon?"

I saw Luna's body clench slightly.

"Is something wrong?"

"I don't like talking about it."

"Oh." I looked down at my food. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked that."

"Well, now we're even. Not to mention, our deal was that you could ask anything you wanted to, remember?"

"Yeah, but-"

"It's okay. The only part of it I can say without getting kicked out of this place-"

I threw her a surprised glance.

"-Yes, even I would get kicked out. That's the part I am most comfortable with talking about, anyway."

"So, what did you do that you are able to say in here?"

"Only one thing, really." Luna looked back at me, beginning to smile again. "Writing."

"Writing?"

"Yeah. There's no wind on the moon, so I just wrote novels in the dust. Mostly about revenge. When the Elements of Harmony destroyed the hatred that created Nightmare Moon, it also took some of my memories of that time, so I can't remember most of them clearly. I do know that I titled one of them Moonbutt's Vengeance 2: The Vengeancing."

Both of us burst out laughing.

I somehow managed to restrain myself eventually. Wiping a tear from my eye, I went back to my salad. After another few bites, I asked, "Mostly about revenge? Meaning there were others?"

"Well, one of them I can remember really well. It was about some ponies in Canterlot having to do certain tasks or die. They had a way to create magical effects, even though they were Earth Ponies. Of course, I cast myself as the antagonist. But by the end, I, along with almost everyone in the story, was dead." Luna laughed. "Still a lot of fun to write, though."

"Sounds interesting. You should publish it."

"I'll think about it. I do know someone who could probably turn it into something worthy of showing everypony. Any other questions?"

I sat back and thought for a minute. "Yes, I do have one. Can you go to the moon anytime you want?"

"Easily, and I can take whatever I want with me. Of course, Celestia found a way to keep me there for a while. I've actually been working on a spell that creates a portal there, so other ponies can go whenever they want." Luna smirked. "Once I figure that out, I'll turn the place into an amusement park."

"Sounds like a plan." Glancing down, I realized my meal was almost gone. Time flew when I was with Luna, for better or for worse.

We spent the next few seconds in content silence, finishing off our salads. I cast Luna a few lovestruck glances as well, but I couldn't see her return one. Not surprising, really, since she had only just met me.

Luna requested the check and signed it with a flourish. As we got up and started to walk away, I asked a single, simple question; "Did you enjoy this?"

"Yes, I did. We'll have to do this again soon." The Princess leaned towards me and softly planted her muzzle on my cheek. "I have an idea, but I'll tell you in a few nights. How does that sound?"

I nodded, dumbstruck, as Luna waved goodbye to me and briskly trotted off.

I slowly raised my hoof to return the wave, then brought it to the spot on my face where she kissed me. Words cannot describe how elated I was that she had done something like that.

"I understand what just happened, sir, but I'm afraid you're blocking the door."

"Oh, sorry. I'll go."

I walked out of the Canterlot Bistro and cantered back to my apartment, feeling happier than I ever had in my entire life.

Author's Note:

First reader to spot the shameless self-advertising gets the honor of being the first reader to spot the shameless self-advertising, and also a shoutout in the Author's Notes of the next chapter.

Comments

[Minimoog Voyager]

It's a tad quick-paced, but well-written and sweet nonetheless
Hope to see more!

[PegasusMesa]

I'll take a look at it for you.

Right off the bat, I'll say that the "author's note" in the description doesn't really do it for me, but that's not an objective complaint.

[Discord Kantus]

3763838 See how the description says it was loosely based on a forum from OC Roleplay? The person playing Luna in disguise referred to her as Moondancer. As such, I'm sticking with it. Regardless, I was thinking of having the next chapter be an "interlude" (possibly one of several) from Luna's perspective, talking to Celestia. That'll give me a great opportunity to describe Deep's appearance, so I'll be sure to do so when I get around to writing it.

[Jioplip]

No. I'm sorry, but no. I was going to read this chapter to see if there was improvement, but then you go and do something like this:
Canterlaut Haez newditty lauze!

I'm out. Get me off this train, that is the single stupidest piece of fanon I have ever seen, goodbye.

[Discord Kantus]

3763924 If there is one thing I have trouble with, it's defining characters to be more than just robots (although I feel Luna was much better defined in Chapter 2). And, as far as Deep needing counseling... that's the point. He's meant to be deeply depressed.

[Discord Kantus]

3763952 Also, when you say this is the stupidest piece of fanon you have ever read, is that a comical overreaction to get your point across, or is it actually the worst fanfiction you have ever seen?

[Jioplip]

3765001 Not the worst fanfiction, the worst fanon.

Fanon is fan-created information used to fill the gaps in canon or flesh out their fanfiction. Roughly.

And Canterlot having strict nudity laws is the worst fanon I've ever seen.

[Discord Kantus]

3765328 I see. I apologize for asking you to read this more or less shit story.

[Jioplip]

3767487 AHAHAHAHAH! This isn't a shit story, it's not my cup of tea but if I thought it was horrible I never would've made it to the comment box.

[Discord Kantus]

3767529 Sure sounded like it sucked. Yeah, I did ask for it, but without any form of counterbalance (this, this, this, this, this, and this all sucked, but this, this, and this weren't bad), it seemed as though I had fucked up royally. But thanks again for the review.

[Dragonin]

Hahaha...

"Easily, and I can take whatever I want with me. Of course, Celestia found a way to keep me there for a while. I've actually been working on a spell that creates a portal there, so other ponies can go whenever they want." Luna smirked. "Once I figure that out, I'll turn the place into an amusement park."

I now have an idea for my future project

[Discord Kantus]

3996357 Just credit the inspiration and there will be no hard feelings between us.

[Dudeler]

I'm liking this so far, but I have to admit Deep Darkness seems... A little emo. It's a little depressing reading his backstory, especially how he'd just kill himself if Luna didn't accept his courtship. Speaking of Luna, I can probably understand how almost no ponies have attempted to court her (if not for the reason of being next to the throne and gaining royalty), let alone how some may fear her from her history, but I can't help but feel she's seeing Deep out of desperation after hearing his thoughts on her. Not to mention as Luna tries to protect her subjects despite how they view her, she may have started to become responsible for Deep's well being after hearing what he'd do if she rejected him. Because of these, the pacing for their relationship is getting to be too fast as far as I can see, especially with all of it happening on a single night. I'd like to see where this goes, but the characters here so far is a little sour to my taste.

[Discord Kantus]

4537746 Remember when I said pacing wasn't my strong suit? You can see why here. And yes, both Deep and Luna are depressed, albeit in different ways. That was the way I was trying to get it to come across, and hopefully turn that into an arc later on, although not the crux of the plot.

[Discord Kantus]

5531092 I ended this story because it was bad. I had no direction with which to move it, my OC was terrible (that name... ugh...) and my attempt to make him suffer from severe depression made him appear more like an unpitiable spineless protoplasm than someone truly depressed.