A young filly's father goes missing. When nopony else seems to want to help, she turns to the only pony willing to walk the extra mile...
This is the story of Prince Silver Saddle
Chapters (1)
Ivory Crash
Joined 23rd Sep, 2012 ·
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Finally. Prince Silver Saddle, the strongest pony in Equestria!
1940012
Tell me what you think.
*sees the name* Hot in cleveland!
1940525 I don't even watch the show. The idea just popped in my head and I couldn't help myself.
1940533
1940549 Well aware of the clip >.< Gotta get my pony fix somehow.... no new episode until NEXT saturday...
1940561 Ik i was just posting for the people who weren't :P and ikr no ponies this saturday...
1940565 Well thank you very much. I probably should have done that myself...
1940570 You're welcome
My emotions consist of extremely condensed "Wat" right now.
Still, this looks like it's shaping up into. . . something.
Keep hammering away at it, I'm sure you'll get the shape out of it sooner or later.
1940012 I know, right? I've been waiting forever!
I want this to get attention, so a few suggestions:
It's = it is. The word you want most of the time here is "its."
I wasn't sure if you really meant to use the word "condolences." Probably you did, if you meant "expressions of pity," but it's usually used as in "my condolences" = "sorry for your loss." That's appropriate, but it isn't immediately clear why the ponies in the saloon would offer condolences, so perhaps another word choice would make that clearer.
"Devoid of light" suggests that there is no light whatsoever, and of course you mean it's much darker there.
There are a few other nitpicks I could make, but the concept is irresistible! I cannot wait to see what happens next to these two massively unpleasant characters.
1945202
Would you like a job? Starting now?
*EDIT* Well I wanted to throw a spongebob joke in here but I cant find a good pick of Mr. Krabs saying "You're Fired."
Thank you for bringing those to my attention.