A pretend penmonkey--the pauper of the pages--with a penchant for the preposterous but perhaps a thin sliver of potential. Please, peruse my parables; you may, perchance, prefer them.
C-c-c-c-c-c-combo breaker!!!!!! S-s-s-s-sweeeeeeeettt!!!! Ima tracking dis story!!!
You went on a word bender in the first paragraph..
Oh man you have a good story going here! Can't wait to read more of it
Still amazing, a bit sad to see none of the usual (non-OC) characters coming along on the journey, but alas, this could be a good chance to get out of that thinking
Love the story, and I see improvements from the first chapter (in which I had almost nothing to critique)... YOU'RE MAKING MY JOB HARD!
Edit: I'm actually a bit surprised to see so few views... Not just on this one, but on chapter 1 as well. It deserves so many more
Glad you're still enjoying it! As far as bringing along canon characters is concerned, when I was outlining, it was extremely tempting to make up some excuse to get one of the mane 6 to join the expedition. It would have been nice to write for a character that most people are already interested and emotionally invested in, but in the end, I couldn't figure out any way to bring in any of the mane cast that didn't seem reasonable and believable. I suppose I could have brought in a background character, but in that case I would have still ended up, for the most part, creating a personality for them anyway. Hopefully, though, people will still find the two supporting OC's entertaining enough- particularly Chief, whom I'm finding to be extremely fun to write. Also, as far as views go, I haven't really spread this around the internet all that much yet.. Honestly, I really have no idea how to go about getting new readers, aside from sending this in to EqD, which I plan to do sometime around chapter 5, and after I get a lot of editing done. Anyway, thanks for the support and feedback.
>>156827156827 A good way to get "easy" views is just commenting a lot on this site
My own little 2-chapter-on-hiatus-3.5-stars-fic-drafts have 554 views, just from my commenting alone
Actually, I've had the idea of being able to reference as many of my favorite fics from this site, into my own fic and still make it make sense, be they big plot-points or just small references. Would you mind if I used Roads a bit? He wouldn't make more than a small cameo
>>159071159071 Not at all, so long as he stays relatively in character.
Rosencranz updates? Good day just turned great Nice to hear a bit of backstory (if you can call it that) for Summers and Chief.
If I hadn't already tossed all of my love at this, I would do it. Here, take the rest * literally throws love*
Aaww, on the inside Summer is just a real nice gi*Summer puts knife at throat* ahem... A total BADASS! *gulp*
I've asked it before and I'll ask it again; why doesn't this have more views!?
I like it. Now to read more.
Really good dialogue here!
Your walls of text are just filler in between your beautiful dialogue. Seriously! You write voices so well! The closer I look the more I enjoy the characterizations
Best chapter yet. Can't wait to tear it apart.
"talk to an old professor who just perfected a method of embedding a magical 'beacon' in space-time, insulating the destination of teleportation and making line-of-sight irrelevant, so long as the pony performing the spell is going somewhere they've already been."
Out of curiosity, did you borrow that from another fic? I feel like it's a familiar concept...
Love this fic!
If I didn't know better I'd say that Summer's dad had a chocolate-themed cutie mark.
This story is awesome, keep it up!
End on a cliffhanger? Cruel, you are.
If there's one thing curiously absent from MLP fanon, it's an origin story of the Elements of Harmony. The idea that they were forged (or simply manifested) in various Nexuses around the world is an appealing idea to me. I'm not sure this is the direction you're going, but a similar energy signature gives me ideas.
Can't wait for more!
@Truth_Seeker Glad you liked it! The whole "space-time beacon" thing was an original idea--I've not come across any fics with that concept that I remember, though I'm sure there's something similar our there somewhere. It's also entirely possible that I actually did read something with that general concept, and then forget the source but not the idea, so ai suppose it might not be completely of my own invention.
As for the Elements idea...it's not something I'll fully explore in this fic, but I've got some ideas about that (none of which are fully crystallized yet, but they are in the general vein of what you are talking about) that I plan to go into in more depth in subsequent fics in this continuity.
And the cliffhanger ending? Couldn't help myself. Unfortunately, you may have to wait a bit longer than normal to see that resolved, too--I've stopped writing new stuff to focus on editing what I've got, and its taking longer than I anticipated. Technological troubles and what have you. Anyway, glad you're enjoying it, stay tuned for more!
Also, sorry for any typos. I'm posting from my phone.
Seriously, keep writing this. It has inspired me to right and really is a excellent read. Thanks for getting me more into fan-fiction.
I... I've inspired you to write? Oh my. That's probably one of the best compliments I've ever received. I still remember the fic that made me decide I wanted to start a work of my own, and how much I enjoyed reading it. That I could turn around and give to someone else what it gave to me is fantastic to hear.
Also, I definitely won't stop writing any time soon. I just finished the draft of Chapter VI, though I'm afraid it may be a while until I release it, because I still have to edit it and Chapter V.
*whimper* didn't see all of this coming... That was quite a chapter, quite chilling in the way it leaves off as well. Once again, a very well done piece!
It updated?! And what a chapter!
Yay update! It just keeps getting better and better... Keep it up!
Suddenly we're getting updates quicker than usual... not that I'm complaining, I love this stuff!
Now that I'm caught up with editing, Rosen should be able to do about a chapter a week.
Sorry about leaving you with the cliffhanger for so long! I'm lazy.
>>889248889248 As a fan of this story, I can live with it
Bleh. I just went through this again for the first time in a while. I think when I'm done with the whole thing, I may completely rewrite this chapter.
EDIT: Did it.
you deserve more publicity. i mean, how can you be on EQD and have only 27 up votes!
it's not right
I know I've said this countless times before, but why isn't this more viewed? It's seriously good!
Oh sweet Celestia was this chapter amazing!! Everything from Roads on the brink of insanity, the epic battle, a fight to survive, Chief's past and the interaction between Roads and Summer. It was all perfectly executed! I could really feel the intensity of the huge battle with Princess and based on how the story has gone so far, I could never tell if Roads would survive or be taken down by Princess. This story needs more love, it is easily one of the finest out there and in my book is on par with the biggest stories around! Keep up the amazing work Rosencranz, I look forward to the coming chapters and keep on being awesomer than awesome! I now give you some 'staches!
Honestly, this got me into fanfics and is the whole reason I even have a account on here. I really love how you can fit so much character into a few chapters compared to others which take longer. Hell, this has even gotten me into writing a few fanfics of my own so, hell yeah keep writing man!
You guys--all of you--made my day. Seriously. Thank you so much!
>>975666975666>>976218976218 I think it's because the google docs version of this is also up on EQD and that's where people go to view it. I started using the fimfic version because this is a lot easier to keep track of.
>>980833980833 Hmm, yeah that does make sense...
I've come up with solutions. Most of them involve Rosen writing more.
It'll be great!
Trust me, I'm a doctor.
And sleeping less, apparently. Way, way less.
>>980239980239 Awwwww... Thanks!
This is a fantastic story, Rosencranz! This is the first fanfiction I read, & I cannot wait to read more chapters!
Ahh love this story man, please keep up the great work!
Another fantastic addition to the story! I Loved the interaction between Willow and Aspen, showing both Princess and the Equestrians in a different viewpoint was a very nice touch. Once again, the interaction between Roads and Summer is very well done especially both of their reactions to have to take survival over feelings, ad Roads' inner conflict that comes with it. I can't wait to see what comes next and in response to what your editor said, I am glad that you update as often as you do. Compared to so many other authors and stories, It is great how comparatively frequent it is! Once again, I highly anticipate next chapter and keep on being awesome!
Please excuse slight errors in formatting for the next few days. I've got a bit of editing I need to do for the first few chapters, and between BB tagging and reinserting all the tabs, I tend to make tiny slip ups. I'll try and keep everything shipshape. Oh, and I'm going back and decapitalizing "nexus" and "ley line" and such, so if you spot something with improper capitalization, and have time to leave a comment, let me know.
I love the conversation between Aspen and Willow. It made me smile. A lot.
I might just read the play
If you thought that was good... Oh man. Willow is my waifu. You'll see shortly.
This just keeps getting more and more epic! Willow and Aspen being awesome, Princess losing ground, Roads gaining magical abilities, and damn near a civil war! What can I say other than amazing work as always!
“Guys,” he said over the whine of the tripwire. “I think I just started a war.”
Welp, color me interested
Rosen! Ladies are nice and all, BUT I NEED MOAR!
I love you, Rosen
Love you too, Pip.
This is such a well written story that the first time I read through it I was up all night. Needless to say this last chapter is a good transition into the final fray. keep up the extraordinary work.
Good, bad, and ugly, written well, and in great taste. Thank you highly for writing this, and I truly hope your muse always guides you!