Luna has been back in Equestria for awhile, but she still hasn't heard what got her banished. She is untrusted still by everyone, even her sister, Celestia. She wants the truth. And she wants forgiveness.
Luna has been back in Equestria for awhile, but she still hasn't heard what got her banished. She is untrusted still by everyone, even her sister, Celestia. She wants the truth. And she wants forgiveness.
Spoiler alert.
Title of chapter 4
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You can pretty much read the entire story off of the titles eh?
Ha
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Bro... I just commented to one of your other comments. True love...
I call being Twilight, you can be Trixie.
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And I just commented on the comment you made on my reply to that other story.
Stop it.
This is confusing!
1739725 It's not supposed to make sense! JUST SHUT UP AND KISS ME
????1739725>>1739709
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Fine! But I expect extra confusion tonight after dinner!
I changed chapter 4's title. I didn't expect people to see the story so fast 1739680
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Your wish shall be granted.
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Ahhh...
Good.
It's just that I read the title of chapter 4 and thought "Oh, why read? I know how it ends basically".
I did read though and I enjoyed.
Well thanks! It is a short chapter though, there isn't too much going on in it. Mostly it's a conclusion, or an epilogue.
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Not the most riveting description. Then again I judge every piece by the "Show, don't tell" theory of writing. This is a story I myself have attempted to do with a varying degree of success. It's an interesting take on it, but the lack of originality and premise needs to be supported by stylistic writing. The dialogue is sometimes believable, but Celestia seems out of character slightly. She does not seem one prone to wrath, but that's just my take on her.
Also, mainly because I was ridiculed for such dialogue. While a lot of authors don't use perfect early modern English for Luna, this story seems to take place in the closest possible time frame to her return. Your use of contractions are out of place and some of the wording is funky.
Other than that, I like the natural conflict you found between them. Very organic for the most part.
Uh, he wasn't alive 1000 years ago.
can i ask why the pony so scared of the night, one screaming cause she didn't make it home before it got dark, i'm scared of the dark really scared of it and i don't scream
GARGHHH I MISSED THE UNVEILING!
Commencing read.
gameinformer.com/cfs-filesystemfile.ashx/__key/CommunityServer-Components-ImageFileViewer/CommunityServer-Components-UserFiles-00-00-75-88-81-Attached+Files/8611.Pinkie-Pie-popcorn.jpg_2D00_610x0.jpg
cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/23937572.jpg
I'm gonna find a meme picture for each chapter, I swear it.
Damn Shiney's old.
Promised picture:
5.asset.soup.io/asset/2393/2837_c694.png
EDIT: BBkat beat me to it
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Omg, I can't believe I put that!
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That pony was REALLY scared of the dark, and more likely, the evil beasts that lie in the shadows.
I completely forgot about Shining Armor! Sorry for the mistake. I got caught up in writing :3
I liked how you had the crowd apologize to Luna in the end. After all, it was the ponies actions that caused Luna to be hurt and show her rage and sorrow. Luna was just acting in a way that many people would if they were constantly feared and rejected. Wonderful story!
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