• Published 3rd Oct 2012
  • 8,162 Views, 406 Comments

Artemis Fowl: The Equine Dominion - _No_One_Remains_

Artemis finds himself searching for wealth in a rather interesting land.

  • ...

The Genius's Ambitions

Artemis Fowl II: a twelve-year-old genius and criminal mastermind. I would say he had the class of a remarkable billionaire, but he no longer held that fortune. For nearly a year ago, the gaunt preteen's father decided to take advantage of the growing post-Soviet Russia economy. The head of the family took a bodyguard and a quarter-million cans of cola into the Bay of Kola, intent on selling it to the average post-Soviet citizen. What happened, however, wasn't exactly as planned.

The Russian Mafia didn't take kindly to a foreigner edging in on their business, and the bombing of the Fowl Star solved that particular issue. The supposed death of Artemis Fowl I sent his wife Angeline into spiraling insanity and his son into denial. By splurging hundreds of millions of Irish pounds on expeditions to the Arctic in search of the head of the family, on top of the loss of millions of dollars of cola, the Fowls found themselves stripped of their honor and, more importantly, billionaire status.

Artemis II was not pleased with his dwindling resources, having been forced to halt the Arctic expeditions. Taking a break from his usual criminal enterprises, the boy began to search for much grander sources of income. He had a stroke of genius: why not search for fortune with something completely untapped, never before touched by man?

He began investigating the histories of dozens of cultures, searching for lost treasures through myths of grandeur and luxury waiting to be claimed. Eventually the boy found a common trend: every civilization he examined had some link to things described as 'Fairies' or simply the 'People'. With those mythologies in mind, he sought to find real evidence of the beings of lore. Finding lead after lead, he was brought time and time again to dead ends and humans attempting to cash in on superstition. So, realizing that his goal was one of impossible optimism, he gave up his hunt for 'Fairies.'

Artemis returned to researching cultural histories, eventually finding a hidden message in a Nordic tome that left a vague hint towards some kind of Equine creature, a diminutive pastel-colored conglomeration of sentient horses with pure, untapped magical energy inside of them. In the tome it spoke of a parallel world, a plane of existence so closely lined up with our own that it would only take a careful push to reach it. According to the message, the ancient Nordic peoples held rituals to summon certain elements of the other plane to them for varying reasons.

After months of research, Artemis had found a way to retrieve it. After throwing nearly half of his family's remaining fortune to research, he had created a watch-like device capable of rending and altering reality itself. The plane of existence just beyond the reach of mankind would soon be his to harvest.

The device used the basic principal of David Harvey’s space-time compression theory. The genius put together a volatile mass of radioactive isotopes, coated them in lead, and attached a battery of plutonium-224. He wired the battery to multiple electrical currents and coated the creation in a denser form of lead. The radiation was safely contained by the coating.

He attached the wired currents to a single button and then placed the entire creation into a casing that resembled a digital watch. At the push of a button, the plutonium ‘battery’ would react with the mass of isotopes to create a violent compression of time and space within a spherical radius of the device.

If the Nordic tome was correct, and the world it spoke of was just a push away, compressing space and time would be the only way to reach it. Artemis couldn’t be certain his machine would work, nor could he be certain the world in the tome actually existed, but he had to try.

Using the laboratory as a safe zone, the boy ran test after test, watching the device vanish and reappear in a burst of light time and time again. Each time, it rematerialized with something new on it. Nothing organic, but some sign of another world on the other side of the compression. When the sample he received didn’t resemble that of the world mentioned in the tome, he altered the amount of electricity that connected to the nuclear battery.

Finally, after removing several of the circuits, the device rematerialized with some sort of brightly-colored rock beside it. The rock looked as if it had been painted with pastels, and the image evoked by the Nordic passage immediately sprang to mind. After countless tests, he decided it was time to try sending an organic creature into the compression.

Artemis affixed the device to a lab rat and reset the timer on the electrical current to the battery, a short minute-long test. He knew the watch would return by itself without question, hopefully in his desired world, but he was unsure of the results of sending a living creature with it. He prepared the sterile test chamber in his laboratory, and engaged the device remotely. The rat was gone in a blast of golden light: a wormhole compressing time and space. Just as instantaneously as it appeared, the light faded. Artemis glared down at his Rolex and began counting off a minute.

Unbeknownst to the preteen genius, in a world far different from his own, the sun shined brightly down on the residents of a peaceful and unsuspecting world. On the far edge of a little town close to the capitol of this new world, a small home was carved out of a tree. This tree was the home of one particular resident of the new world, who happened to own several creatures of varying size. The door to the home was left wide open for the creatures to have easy access to their owner.

A powder-white rabbit bounded through the open door, nearly colliding with his caretaker. He tugged on her coat repeatedly, an embodiment of the definition of urgency.

"Not now, Angel, I almost have your salad. You can stop fussing, okay?" The long pink mane and pale yellow coat of the Pegasus shined in the sunlight as she turned to face the hyperactive bunny. She carefully balanced a plump cherry on the mound of various greens in the ceramic bowl she currently held.

The rabbit continued tugging furiously with one paw, pointing outside with his free one. His owner carefully placed the bowl on the floor, cocking an eyebrow at her pet.

"What is it?" she asked with a slightly annoyed tone. The bunny grabbed her mane and led her through the door, staring out toward the edge of the forest. "What's the matter?" The caretaker asked as the rabbit continued frantically guiding her outside.

The duo descended the path from her house to a nearby stream, Angel scurrying along with a look of anxiety. He stopped near a ruffled bush, and hid behind a nearby rock. "Is there something in here?" the pony asked. Angel nodded furiously, and pointed at a small figure resting inside the bush. "Oh, is it hurt? Should I go help it?" Angel shook his head and continued cowering.

"It’s okay; I’ll take a look at it." She tittered at the frightened bunny. She leaned down, peering at the figure. She whispered, "Hello? Are you okay?" The response received was a weak squeak. The Pegasus gently lifted the figure from the ground with her mouth and placed it in the light. The grotesque sight appalled her, causing her to leap back behind a nearby large rock. Angel’s fear suddenly seemed justified to the pony.

What had once been a small white mouse was in front of her, shivering on the ground with a dark metal ring wrapped around it. Small black and gold pulsing muscles spread under its fur from where the object touched it, glowing faintly with their respective colors. The pony leaned out from behind the rock and cautiously approached the mouse. She slowly reached her hoof towards it and made contact with the black device attached to the mouse.

A burst of golden light engulfed her, and she felt it peeling away at her in a metaphysical tug of war, fighting to fling her through the dimensional void. She had no way to fight it, and helplessly watched as her surroundings faded, black nothingness replacing them. She felt like she was watching herself, a spectator to the events unfolding before her. Just as she began to calm, a burst of golden light started to spread through the void. A metallic surface began extending from her hooves, curling up to form walls and a ceiling, which were adorned with various gauges and pipes, strange glowing walls of text accompanying them.

Artemis watched in awe as not only the lab rat returned, but an ominous pastel-colored organic being. A long candy-pink mane swept over half of the being's snout, which in turn was coated in pale yellow fur. The rat seemed to be fused to the device, but that was no matter as of now. The tag-along had provided all the convincing he needed that the device reached its destination.

But to use the device himself would require the examination of test subject, not to mention the recovery and examination of the device proper. Its interaction with the mouse was disturbing, yet the fact that the pale yellow quadruped was unharmed by it generated numerous questions. Artemis would most definitely need more time to examine all of the variables before using the device himself.


The pony began backing into a corner, her mane dangling limply over her face, hoping that the gaunt figure in the opposite corner of the room would ignore her. To her relief, the figure approached the center of the farthest wall and gently pressed a button protruding it. The biped never took his eyes off of her, which was slightly unnerving.

The mysterious biped was clad in a sleek sports jacket and a ruffled white-cotton collared shirt. Its dark brown mane was cut relatively short, a few strands of hair jutting in random directions. It had a tired-yet-confident mask on its face. The metal section of wall behind it slid open, revealing a closet-sized room. The two-legged creature stepped into it, the wall sliding shut again. A whirring sound accompanied the closure of the metal panel.

The equine emerged from her corner and examined the mouse. The device was still bound to it, and it let out a pitiful squeal as she approached, almost as if begging for death. It was immobilized by the ring, and even with the health of a creature at stake, the pony’s fear and disorientation prevented her from assisting it. She was transfixed to the gruesome sight, the horror of the mouse's impending doom paralyzing her. She stared as the rodent stopped attempting to squirm or scurry; it had accepted its fate. She shed a silent tear.

Artemis emerged from the elevator and strolled at a brisk pace towards the security room, where his single-most-valued employee was monitoring the chamber. Artemis passed through the doorway, and peered over the large brute’s shoulder. The experiment was a success…and a failure. His destination's authenticity was confirmed, but there seemed to be a few kinks in the device. The elegant employee rose from his chair and turned towards his charge.

The hulk of a man, towering over the twelve year-old mastermind before him, a seven foot tall brute, spoke. "What do we do with it, sir?"

"What we would do with any miraculous discovery, my friend," Artemis replied, and beckoned for the man to follow.

"Sir, what do I need to do?" the man inquired as he walked beside his employer, maintaining a brisk pace.

Artemis replied after a brief moment of reflection, "Restrain it. If it is necessary, you may harm it." The duo arrived at the elevator, and the larger man began shifting his suit slightly, scratching his leg, and generally appearing to be lost in thought.

To the above-average mercenary, assassin, or soldier, the slight clangs of steel that accompanied the man’s shifting would've alerted them to the mobile armory he carried. The Sig Sauer P226 in a belt holster, a plethora of throwing knives in his boots, a garrote in his watch, the stun grenades stuffed in his various pockets, and a good old ball-bearing cosh stuffed in his shirt all provided ample security for his charge. But on this occasion, he had a weapon he rarely used on his person. It was a specialized tranquilizer dart rifle, fully automatic and extremely accurate. He planned to please his charge.

The door slid open with a metallic hiss, and the brute stepped inside. Artemis grinned smugly and sighed, "I wish you luck, Butler." The elegant thug nodded and held the tranquilizer rifle in the air reassuringly.

The Pegasus continued to wallow in the laboratory, even with the absence of the observing monster. She was immobilized by the mouse writhing in pain on the floor in front of her, the animal's midsection pulsating ever more violently. It was like watching somepony having a seizure, completely aware of its suffering. The pony's connection with animals was intensifying the misery she felt at her cowardice. It continued convulsing, vaguely aware of its horrible situation. The pony had felt this way only once before, when she thought she had killed her kingdom’s leader’s beloved pet.

She could almost just...explode...a horrible burst of years of pent up rage, suffering, and mistreatment all directed at whoever was unfortunate enough to trigger it.

Butler absentmindedly tapped his heel against the ground as the elevator made its gradual descent. He ran a hand over his suit, seemingly tidying it. To the trained eye, however, he was taking account of each potentially lethal weapon shoved in every nook of his outfit. The elevator doors slid open, revealing the creature in the exact same position as before, seemingly frozen by terror. Its eyes were glued to the lab rat, which was convulsing on the ground. Butler approached the equine creature, stopping just in front of the dying rat.

Almost as if waiting for someone to come along to take responsibility for its death, the rat’s body exploded as the brute stopped his advance, splattering a mixture of blood and bile over his shoes and the cowering pony’s muzzle. The equine’s mind latched on to the only sensible explanation it could find: the biped had just murdered the rat. A swell of rage knotted in her gut, and she acted on it.

She leaped at the towering beast before her as she screamed, "You do not hurt helpless animals!" The pale-yellow creature before Butler exploded with sound as it darted toward the closing elevator to make some form of escape.

It took the brute a few seconds to register everything that had just happened. In those few seconds, the foreign creature reached the lift. The bodyguard couldn't let it get upstairs; that was a potentially dangerous situation. He burst into a sudden sprint after it, but the pony had unfurled a pair of seemingly weak-looking wings, flying into the elevator at a speed it shouldn't have been able to attain. In a single fluid motion, Butler rolled forward, aimed the dart gun at the flying horse, and fired a single dart directly at it.

The dart shot through the air, closing on its target. Just as it was closing in on the target, the doors of the elevator miraculously closed around it, wedging it in place. The lift began its ascent, the dart creating a flurry of sparks as it was pushed from the breach.

Artemis absentmindedly tapped his foot as the elevator ascended, expecting a triumphant Butler carrying the creature’s body over his shoulder. What emerged was not what he expected; the winged equine flew out of the elevator and crashed right into him, sending him to the ground. Without wasting time, and in a fit of confusion, it dashed up the stairs, unwittingly entering the manor attic. The boy picked himself up off the ground and took account of what had happened.

The one perk of being hit head-on by the creature was that he had gotten a slightly more detailed view of it. It was horse-like in appearance, perhaps one meter tall at the shoulders. It was pale-yellow with a light pink mane. Artemis decided to think of it as a pony, given its size and general body structure. He shifted his attention to himself, bringing a hand to his chest to examine the point of impact; it was definitely sore but nothing serious. At worst he had a few bruises.

He then realized a far more important fact: the creature had retreated into his currently-psychotic mother's bedroom. He immediately darted up the stairs, his arms extended in hopes of catching the stray alien. Yanking the oak double doors of the attic open, he found the creature once again shivering in a corner, along with a very surprised young girl.

"Arty, would you mind closing the door behind you?" Angeline Fowl asked her son from the comfort of her bed, currently unaware of the foreign being in her bedroom corner. She probably simply thought it was a hallucination of some sort. The girl, however, approached Artemis.

"What is that, Artemis?" She pointed at the creature and asked, a tray of cucumber slices resting elegantly on her other palm.

"It’s a trans-dimensional visitor. I'll explain everything later, Juliet, but I first need to subdue it. It could be hazardous to our health, as I am unaware of what it did to your brother, seeing as how it escaped him in the lab." He stretched his arm forward awkwardly as he spoke, slowly approaching the creature.

He was entirely prepared to pin it into unconsciousness, considering what threat it posed. The boy began his forward dash toward the corner, and would've contacted the cowardly creature before him had Juliet not grabbed the collar of his suit and dragged him backwards.

"Juliet, unhand me! What are you doing!?" he shouted as he struggled to escape her considerably strong grip.

"Look at it; it’s harmless! I don't know what it did to Butler, but it isn't even standing! It's just curled up in a corner!" She scoffed at him with empathy toward the creature, holding Artemis from continuing his assault.

"Unhand my son, please. I won't hesitate to hire a new maid…" His mother blankly commanded, still oblivious of the situation at hand.

Butler suddenly dashed into the room, the dart gun drawn. When he noticed his sister’s grip on the boy, he sighed, "What are you doing, Juliet? You're interfering with the young master’s experiment."

"I'm trying to stop him from murdering a defenseless creature! Look at it!" She positioned herself in front of the creature, ensuring Artemis could no longer approach it. While the two siblings bickered uncharacteristically, the tiny equine decided it was time to take action.

While the three coherent bipeds were occupied with their opposing moral, the pony slowly tiptoed toward the door.
"Butler, it's escaping!" Artemis snapped his attention from the arguing duo back to the equine. The pair continued their dispute, completely unaware of the events unfurling around them.

Irritated by the odd lack of attention, the boy recovered quickly and darted back down the stairs after the pony. Its next destination had been the manor kitchen. The creature seemed to be madly searching for an exit as he approached it. He held his hands up beside him, walking slowly, as if to show he meant it no harm.

Just as he began to advance on the pony, he heard the faint words, "Please don't hurt me..." Where had they come from? The meek, almost inaudible voice sounded extremely close. Had the creature just spoken?

"Can you talk?" Artemis asked, still approaching at a slightly slower pace.

"Y-yes…" The creature mumbled as it turned to face him.

He approached it, his pace slowing ever more, and lowered both arms entirely. "What's your name?" he gently inquired.

"F-F-Flu-" It responded extremely quietly, so quietly that the genius could only catch the first syllable.

"Excuse me?" Artemis asked with a slight hint of annoyance in his tone.

"F-Fluttershy." It forced out at an audible volume.

The boy grinned innocently and whispered, "My name is Artemis. I won't hurt you, I promise. I just want to talk to you, and considering your quiet nature, that task would be much simpler at a closer proximity."

Fluttershy cautiously approached the boy with her head bowed low. The time was right. Artemis lunged forward in an attempt to grab the pony-like creature, and it spread its wings and launched backwards, barely avoiding the boy's fingers. Its wings hit a cutting board, knocking it into the air, a mess of cucumbers and a sharp knife hurtling through the air. Artemis's eyes followed the knife as it sailed directly towards him. He put up his forearm, and the knife sliced into it, a bit of blood flowing from the wound.

A sudden burst of rage escaped the usually-collected boy, "Gah, damn you!" He kicked the knife away from him on the ground as the pony fearfully galloped from the room. Artemis stomped to a nearby first-aid cabinet and reluctantly cut his sleeve off from the elbow, revealing an incision that just deep enough to draw blood.

He grunted in pain as he applied a cleansing agent to the wound. The burning from the antibiotic was a sign it was working, and he tightly wove a bandage around his forearm. He flexed his fingers and rotated his wrist, relieved a nerve hadn't been severed. He turned and started marching towards the elevator when he slipped on a puddle of juice left by the cucumbers. To add insult to injury, his suit was now thoroughly ruined.

He cursed the fruit and scrambled to his feet when a realization hit him like an anvil. He had a solution to the single complication from the first live test. The metallic casing of the device had bonded to the rat’s flesh during the space-time compression. Being a basic material, cucumbers and the juice they produce would easily prevent the metal from reacting to a person’s flesh.

Or at least, that’s the idea that came to mind. Just like the initial tests, the boy couldn’t be certain his theories would work, but he had a feeling in his gut.

So, with nothing but a hunch to go on, he gathered the intact slices of cucumber and mashed them together in his right hand, smothering it in the meat and juice. He then hurried after the pony, hoping he wouldn’t regret his idea.


Fluttershy was nearly petrified, pure adrenaline propelling her to the basement. She darted into the fake wall again and randomly hit one of the glowing sections of it. The front slid shut, and a peaceful hum filled the chamber. The door again opened, and she darted out into the basement. She turned to run back into the chamber, but it had already closed.
She approached the horrendous device from before, splattered with gore, and stared at it, examining its function, and how it had tormented the cute little mouse.

She was shaken from her trance by a ding, and the door again slid open, Artemis emerging from it. One of his arms appeared to be smothered in some sort of greenish glop that dropped from his hand, which was open as if ready to grab something. A spot of blood bled through the bandage on the other arm. Fluttershy knew she had to escape, and the only thing she could think of was the device. She reluctantly reached for it, hoping it wouldn't affect her like it had the mouse.

Artemis immediately sprang to life when the foreign being began reaching for the device. He dove forward in an attempt to intercept her, and succeeded, his arm blocking her foreleg as it touched the device. A veil of golden light engulfed the pair, and was quickly replaced with a black void. A wooden floor etched out below them, eventually bending upwards to form walls and a ceiling. As the scenery came into view, Artemis was overjoyed.

The device worked. His theory had worked as well, for the device remained on the floor, not attached to either being's flesh as they stood and moved away from one another. He looked around, noticing a large amount of small creatures peering at him from various nooks, a small kitchen, and a cutting board with a partially eaten cucumber on it. That explained why Fluttershy hadn't been affected by the device earlier.

Then something hit him. Literally. A mug shattered over his head, revealing a particularly peeved white bunny standing in the cabinet beside him.