Scootalove is a Battlefield

Rainbow Dash, in her Wonderbolt suit, flew leisurely toward her cloud mansion, coming across Fluttershy leaving it. "Hey Fluttershy, how was Scootaloo?"

Fluttershy smiled. "Oh, she's been just a little angel...and not like Angel the bunny, who's a little less than an angel. She's really loving getting to live with you."

Rainbow chuckled. "Yeah, aren't I great? I got plenty of space for her, so...just need to come up with a way she can get up and down without us."

Fluttershy nodded. "Well it should be fine for the weekend as long as you don't leave her behind. You two have fun!" She then flew off.

Rainbow went in, calling out "Scootaloo, I'm home!" She waited a moment, but got no response, then shrugged and went to the couch, unzipping her Wonderbolt suit.

"...help..." came a weak voice that sounded like Scootaloo.

Rainbow quickly leaped upwards out of her suit, then dashed over into her bedroom. Right there on the floor was Scootaloo laying hooves-up under a blanket, mouth and eyes open, staring unfocused at the ceiling. "Scoots!" Rainbow cried.

There was no response...and it didn't look like Scootaloo was breathing.. She went in close and waited for Scootaloo to breathe, but...the filly's chest wasn't moving.

Rainbow began hyperventilating, then took a moment to take a deep breath. "Okay, Rainbow, you got this, you're a Wonderbolt, Celestia damn it! CPR, CPR...what was the training...okay, I can do this!" She quickly put her lips to the filly's and blew.

Then came the click and flash of a camera from her side.

Rainbow blinked and looked over at Tank with his leg on the camera's button. "Huh?" she asked as she pulled away.

Scootaloo suddenly inhaled, then jerked upwards and giggled, startling Rainbow.

Rainbow screamed and tumbled backwards into her closet, a pile of trophies and boxes burying her up to her neck instantly.

Tank nudged the camera and took another picture.

Rainbow sighed. "Ugh...is this a prank?"

Scootaloo giggled a bit harder for a moment, before taking a few deep breaths and nodding. "You should've seen the look on your face! Good thing Tank helped me get pictures."

Rainbow closed her eyes a moment and rubbed her temples. "Right...you can keep those, but you have to keep those, nopony else sees them, got it?"

Scootaloo rolled her eyes. "Alright." She then rushed over, clearing some boxes away, and hugged Dash, closing her eyes.

Dash gave her a noogie. "It was clever...now how about some macaroni and cheese, squirt? I'm cookin'."

Scootaloo opened an eye. "You sure you don't want me to help after what happened last time?"

Rainbow groaned. "Okay, so I stuck it to the ceiling one time, it doesn't mean I can't cook. I just...had a disagreement with the stove is all, won't happen again."

Scootaloo giggled. "I'm holding you to that!"

The next morning, Rainbow opened her eyes to find that she was wrapped around Scootaloo, spooning the filly, in bed. "Mmm...well I guess I can't say I'm not a cuddler anymore..."

Scootaloo, with her eyes still closed, gave a light chuckle. "Yeah...how long ya wanna stay like this?"

Rainbow hmmm'd. "Just a little bit..." She rested in place for a few minutes. Finally, she moved her hooves lightly off Scootaloo. "Well, as nice as it is to have my own little teddy bear now that you're here...I uh...I really have to pee. Like, this place'd have another 'rainbow' waterfall if I don't get to the bathroom in a minute..." She broke the embrace and sat up to stretch and sputter out some morning gas.

Scootaloo giggled, then pouted. "Well shoot...I kinda do too."

Rainbow gave the filly a smirk. "Last one there's a rotten e-"

Before she could finish, Scootaloo shot out of bed.

Rainbow gasped. "Hey wait a minute!" She dashed after Scoots, but it was too late, and she slammed into the door, groaning as she then fell onto her rump. "Okay, you win...but only because you cheated! Now let me in!"

Scootaloo chuckled from inside. "Uh-uh!"

Rainbow crossed her hooves and leaned against the door. "Fine, but...you're really playing with fire, here, squirt! Or water, I guess...point is, if I have an accident because you didn't feel like letting me go with ya, you're cleaning it up."

"Okay, but I'll use your robe to clean with!" came Scootaloo's voice from inside, just before a flushing noise.

"You wouldn't dare..." Dash replied.

Scootaloo trotted out with a smirk. "Oh maybe I would...but whatever, it gave you reason to try extra hard!"

Dash groaned and rushed in, slamming the door. "Ugh...but you're washing your hooves, little lady!" She then opened the door.

Scootaloo's eyes went wide as she was grabbed and dragged back in.

A while later, Dash sat down at Sugarcube Corner, across the table from Pinkie, each with their own chocolate milkshake. "So, what did you say you're doing tomorrow that's important?"

Pinkie slurped her milkshake with her eyes close, finishing it all at once, then belched loudly. "Celestia's Chicken Control Conditioning Celebration, or CCCCC for short". She promptly swapped out her empty milkshake with a full one from her mane.

Rainbow raised an eyebrow and played with her straw with her lip. "Um...right, but...what exactly is it about?"

Pinkie paused a moment to think. "Oh, well, see, a lot of foals have trouble being scared of something they shouldn't be, and me and Cheese put on parties where we try to safely expose them with everypony around to support them. It works really well!"

Rainbow blinked a few times. "Yeah but...Celestia's not a foal, and what do chickens have to do with it?"

Pinkie gasped and put her snout to Rainbow's. "Dash, you can't tell anypony...until the party. Celestia...is afraid of chickens! And she's a foal at heart, like everypony should be!"

Rainbow nodded, still squinting a bit with clear confusion. "Right...you can count on me, I guess." She brought over her milkshake and took a sip, only to stop and go wide-eyed. "Rngh..." She pushed it clear off the table and spat brown sludge out onto the table. "WHO PUT MUD IN MY MILKSHAKE?!"

The whole room went quiet...except for chuckling and snickering from the corner, where the CMC sat.

Rainbow stomped over and held up Scootaloo by the scruff of the back of her neck. "Squirt...?"

Scootaloo gave a nervous laugh. "Uh...heheh...hi there. It was uh...Apple Bloom's idea?"

Apple Bloom gulped as Rainbow glared at her. "Uh...well I didn't say she should do it..."

Rainbow rolled her eyes. "Okay, you got me pretty good, but we're not even..."

Scootaloo narrowed her gaze. "What? You tickled me for twenty minutes the other day!"

Rainbow blew a raspberry and waved a hoof. "Oh that? I had to clean the bedsheets after that, it doesn't count!"

Scootaloo crossed her forelegs. "Does too! In fact, I think that makes it count more!"

Sweetie poked her head between the two's. "Mean as I thought the mud was...she does have a point..."

Rainbow sighed and put Scootaloo down. "Right...okay, fine, we're even. Now let's go home."

Scootaloo put on a smug look.

Rainbow then gave a sudden hard slap to Scootaloo's rear, wiping the grin off her face and toppling her forward onto her hooves. "Come along..."

The next morning, Rainbow finished her pancakes and trotted to the bathroom and into the shower. After a moment of inspecting the shelf, she put a hoof to her chin. "Hey Scoots, you seen my loofah?"

Scootaloo zipped in and held it out. "Yeah, uh, I was just playing with it."

Rainbow eyed it, squinting a moment. "Right, okay, I'd ask, but I probably don't want to know the answer." She then got in the shower and turned the water on, humming a tune as she soaped up the loofah and rubbed all over herself, focusing her crevices, starting with the armpits, and slowly working back to her rear.

All the while, Scootaloo watched with a hoof to her mouth, chuckling softly.

As Rainbow finished up with her crotch and back, and started on the buttcrack, her eyes shot open, and then twitched. "You...you didn't..." She began furiously scratching all over herself, kicking the loofah away as she writhed and started scratching her butt. "OH YOU LITTLE TWERP!"

Scootaloo fell onto her back, eyes closed, giggling like mad on the floor. "Ahahah...don't worry...it'll wash off easy..."

Rainbow growled as she put her rear right up to the water stream while splashing her front. "It had BETTER! Or your flank is toast!"

Scootaloo calmed down a bit and stood up. "I'll uh, be right back...hehehe..." She zipped out.

Minutes later, a very wet-looking Rainbow came up to Scootaloo, glaring. "So...why all the pranking these last few days? Just because you live here now doesn't mean you have to be a mini-me."

Scootaloo sighed and got up from the couch, holding a gallon tub of vanilla ice cream. "I just...I guess I'm so used to being by myself a lot, that I wanted to have fun now that I've got you around."

Rainbow shook herself off like a dog, splashing water around, and sighed. "Right...I get that. Wait a minute, is that my ice cream?"

Scootaloo blinked, then looked down. "Oh uh...well...since we share all our food now, uh...our ice cream."

Rainbow's eye twitched slightly. "Scootaloo, this isn't Starlight's village, and I got that for myself. You have your own ice cream."

Scootaloo pouted. "But I already finished that...and uh..." She smirked, then stuck her tongue in the tub and licked around a moment, then blew a raspberry at Rainbow and bit out a big clump. "Mine now according to Sweetie..." she said with her mouth full.

Off in the hallway, Fluttershy trotted in quietly, stopping short.

Rainbow went back to glaring at Scootaloo, took the tub, gave it a lick inside, then grabbed Scootaloo's head and brought their lips together, smooching her with a loud sucking sound.

Scootaloo squirmed a bit and went wide-eyed, then blushed and had her wings go stiff, as bulging in her cheeks showed Rainbow's tongue digging around.

A moment of wet noises later, and Rainbow started swallowing, and then after another moment of much the same, she pulled away, leaving Scootaloo's tongue following out with a bit of ice cream on it, before going back to suck it clean, leaving only a string of spit hanging from it to her mouth. "Mmm...well, Rarity's afraid of a little filly spit. I'm not."

Scootaloo went slack-jawed and blinked a few times. "Uh...y-you think you could uh, help me prepare for when I try and d-date Rumble...? I mean uh..."

Rainbow's face went pale. "Th-that...look, Scoots, it's only fair I let you be as sloppy as Tank with your affection, but my tongue only got involved to wrestle yours for chow. Last I checked, I'm a vegetarian, so your tongue alone isn't on the menu."

Scootaloo looked at the floor. "Sorry...it's just that I don't know who else could help...and we aren't really relate-"

Fluttershy cleared her throat. "Um, if I may help..."

Scootaloo dropped the tub of half-melted ice cream and went pale herself, while Rainbow breathed a sigh of relief.

Fluttershy put on a comforting smile and continued "I'm sure Rainbow wants to teach your awesome technique, but being with her first might um, go badly with how much she cares for you. I taught my brother, and that feathering nincompoop actually got it in his head I kept letting him practice on me because he was great, not out of pity for how utterly bad he was! And then he ruined Rainbow's 8th birthday party...I was so peeved." Fluttershy breathed deeply a moment, her face slowly relaxing.

Rainbow shuddered. "Yeah, okay, I'll show ya the moves, squirt, but only a week after you and your friends try it. ...and you can keep the ice cream, it's tainted....not by your spit, but by being associated with the Zephyr Clown Fiasco. We'll burn the tub together when you're done with it."

Scootaloo shrugged and began ravenously eating the rest of the tub.

Fluttershy put a hoof on Scootaloo's shoulder. "Um, are you sure that's a good idea? You remember what happened when you had too much cheese the other day..."

Scootaloo rolled her eyes. "Sweetie does this all the time, I'm sure ice cream isn't near as bad as cheese for lactose intolerance."

Rainbow crossed her forelegs. "Well if you get the squirts again, squirt, I'm not helping you this time! That was gross with a capital P U... So what brought ya over, Fluttershy? I take it you didn't sense I needed to teach Scootaloo a lesson."

Fluttershy stared a bit at Scootaloo, looking concerned, but then turned to Rainbow. "Oh, maybe I could give some advice later but uh, Pinkie wanted me to fetch you two. You're missing the chicken celebratory Celestial...something?"

Rainbow slammed a hoof to her face. "Oh horseapples, I completely forgot! Let's go!"

Next to Celestia, Rainbow sat down, then Scootaloo, then Fluttershy.

Pinkie, wearing her chicken costume next to a large chicken-shaped cake, cheered "Hurray, my best friend Dash is here! And look, she brought Scootaloo! Scootaloo's kind of like an orange chicken. See Sunbutt, we're all cute and not scary!"

Scootaloo waved as Celestia looked over at her, and put on a nervous grin. Then, after a moment, her grin tightened, as a squeak could be heard.

Rainbow promptly grabbed Scootaloo and swapped her with Fluttershy.

Fluttershy took a sniff and immediately put a hoof to her nose. "Oh my..." She began fanning air away from Celestia with her wings.

Celestia looked over with an eyebrow raised. "Is everything alright, Rainbow Dash? I thought for this event, you'd want Scootaloo close to me...unless she's perhaps a little...self-conscious about being flightless?"

Rainbow chuckled. "Oh no, I just don't want her stinking up your space." She took a moment, then sighed. "And I've been having a little trouble with her..."

Celestia took a sip of her drink. "Oh? I heard she moved in with you...is she not being a good little sister?"

Rainbow shook her head a bit. "Kind of a nightmare, actually...being honest. Nothing I can't handle...just prank after prank after prank."

Celestia nodded. "I'm familiar with the sort, and know just the thing to help. PINKIE! Put Scootaloo in a chicken suit too! One of the ones that doesn't cover the rear."

Pinkie winked and hopped out of sight, then over to Scootaloo with a smaller suit, and in a blur, put it on the filly.

Scootaloo gulped. "Um, maybe I should just..."

Pinkie grabbed the flightless foal fowl and pulled her out onto the cleared area between tables. "Now just follow my lead, and do the chicken dance!" Pinkie began clucking and making exaggerated steps, with her forelegs on her hips.

Scootaloo followed suit slowly, being especially awkward with her legs.

Celestia leaned over to Rainbow. "Liking the show?"

Rainbow nodded. "I take it you're trying to embarrass her for me?"

Celestia grinned. "Oh, the prank's just getting started..." She moved slowly away from her table, and towards the cake. She sidestepped behind the two as they danced, and eyed up the part of the cake that was made to resemble a chicken butt with fairly good anatomical accuracy...and then looked back to Scootaloo, and lined up her body as she raised a leg...

Scootaloo meanwhile got the hang of the dance, and backed up to pretend to peck, hitting Celestia's rear, putting the alicorn off-balance.

Within moments, Celestia's entire front half was in the cake, and so her butt was the only thing sticking out of the fake chicken butt.

Rainbow was the first to laugh, absolutely losing it as she fell off her chair. Pinkie, then much of the crowd, were next.

Scootaloo began to sweat. "Um...you okay, princess?"

Celestia blasted away the chicken cake around her. "Oh...just hurt right in my dignity... Now listen, you careless chicken, nopony makes a fool of the princess when it is her party!"

Scootaloo gulped. "Uh...what are you gonna do to me?"

Celestia smirked. "You will be made an example of...by spending one day to think about your actions...on the moon!"

Scootaloo blinked. "What?"

Celestia gave a clap of her hooves, and Pinkie brought over her party cannon. Celestia then levitated Scootaloo, still in the costume, right into the barrel.

Scootaloo squirmed a bit. "Um...could I use the bathroom first, and uh...isn't there no air up there?"

Celestia held out a hoof, and in a moment, Pinkie brought over a bowl with a bit of fabric at the opening, then stuck it on Scootaloo, and tightened straps in the fabric. "This will protect you on the very short ride over. Luna can take care of things once you're there. Enjoy!" And just like that, she lit the fuse, and Scootaloo was sent flying, screaming, up out of the atmosphere.

Rainbow dashed over to the cannon. "Whoa...uh...what'll happen to her?"

Celestia smiled. "Oh, don't let my theatrics scare you. Luna was once an awful little sister to me, so she knows just what to say to fix others. She's running a little camp for troublemaking foals up there today. Scootaloo will come back I'm sure with a lovely apologetic arts and crafts project for you."

Rainbow breathed a sigh of relief. "Hmm...well I hope they've got a good outhouse there, because Scoots ate a whole gallon of ice cream and it didn't sit well with her stomach!"

Celestia brought her cheek up to Rainbow's. "You know the fastest way to empty your bowels?"

Rainbow took a moment as she eyed the princess up. "Uh...that new rollercoaster Flim and Flam built, that they insist hasn't technically killed anypony yet?"

Celestia chuckled. "Close, but no. Having the end of the pipes exposed to the ultimate vacuum." Celestia gestured upwards. "Empty space sucks harder than anything we can get down here."

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