Entry for the Choices: A Species Change Contest!
A species' swap interpretation of Season 1 - episode 1 and 2!
Author's note: Unfortunately this story came at a time of bad burnout and lack of motivation, so this ended up just a bit rushed. I hope you enjoy it either way!
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An ambitious Earth pony is instructed by her mentor to make some friends. She is sent to the town of Creatureville, where she encounters those that would forever change the course of her life.
Of course, she's just not quite aware of the fact. And she's not aware what they look like yet, either!
Chapters (3)
Your choice of race swaps was certainly an interesting direction, and I really enjoyed what you had. Though the rush to get it posted does show from time to time, especially in some points when it looks like sections of the story just aren't there (a lot of "..." where I'm guessing you intended to come back? I do a similar thing when writing).
I was a little confused in the first chapter when apparently Twi and Spike were seeing to the celebration preparations before finding Rainbow Dash, when they hadn't mentioned it at all up till that point, and Celestia seemed to make a point that the only reason Twi was being sent to Creatureville, was to make friends, and they seemed to be doing that when approaching Applejack. I thought it was a unique twist on the story, so it was a bit surprising when the rest of the introductions roughly followed the show plot (with the obvious changes).
I thoroughly enjoyed Draconequus Celestia, so I was really disappointed when Draconequus Nightmare Moon did so little with her chaos powers. She was a lot more snarky though, and that gave me a good chuckle.
It's a shame you felt rushed, because it shows so much promise, just lacking that last polish to make it really something. But what we did get was still enjoyable
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Thank you so much for the great review! I do wish that things were a bit different surrounding the circumstances of the time I wrote this one, I'm glad to have committed to it in the first place to finish it. I'm glad with the concept and the species I chose, but not so glad with the execution of the story. Still, I'm happy that it's enjoyable to an extent either way!
Not sure how I feel about a Siren being considered anti-loyalty, but I also can't think of anything that would fit better, so it works.