The Changeling Collar

A Changeling defects to Equestria; then the war arrives. Can there be change for the better?

Entry for the Fourth Equestria at War Write Off (2021)
Contest Theme: "A normal being's point of view and life amidst global events."

NOTE: "Equestria at War" is a My Little Pony-based Mod for Hearts of Iron IV, a World War II game. One of its main conflicts is the invasion of Equestria by Changelings.

Cover Image: By me, for better or worse.

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 7 )

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23 KM To Nerdiness

23 KM To Nerdiness #1 · Apr 2nd, 2021 · · ·

Stay awesome, friend.

shining paladin

shining paladin #2 · Apr 2nd, 2021 · 2 · ·

awesome chapter mate

Bicyclette

Bicyclette #3 · Jan 21st, 2022 · 1 · ·

I work hard--odd jobs, menial even. I can't use my best magic but I can fly. I save bits, spent on gifts and food for ponies since their joy and love is *my* feast.

that is interesting! changelings as in canon would have an oddly transactional layer of meaning to friendship, since they need the love of friendship to survive. but bits like this make it sound less so

It's hiveway thinking, I fear.

i admit i don't quite get it, either, which makes for a good way of thinking that's supposed to be unfamiliar

Wings clipped, and a magic-field failsafe flummoxing flight.

nice wordplay!

So much flailing, failing... I'm never going to eat here, but I can't be suffering everywhere. Somewhere: I must belong there.

ah, capturing that feel of being in between two groups, and every hard-won point of attachment to one marking you as a traitor to the other. loved this rendering

Twilight Sparkle- mentioned, ultrabrief speculation ^{(Didn't even get her full first name!)}

hehe. though not being familiar with what events would correspond to this, i can only comment on how it's nice the ending works well as both an unexpected happy ending and as a dying mind in a dreamlike state. and it's always good to see the word "sessile" used; very poetic

this kind of makes me think of a Russian short story for some reason. is it the prison camp? the acuteness of chapter v? in any case, an enjoyable read. thank you for it!

Scribblestick

Scribblestick #4 · Jan 23rd, 2022 · 1 · ·

This is an interesting take on war because it is told from the perspective of a defector from the losing side. There is no winning for this changeling, only suspicion from every side as their efforts to do good are utterly wasted. The journal-style storytelling works very well here, and I especially liked the brevity of section v. I also liked the slightly unusual writing style and the use of changeling-specific phrases (ex. friendship love/taken love, ling, love-drain), as it helps to emphasize how alien this changeling is to the world of ponies and, later, the prison camp. Almost like the journal was translated from a foreign language, and not everything translates just right.

Great story, and I hope you keep it up!

SparklingTwilight

SparklingTwilight #5 · Jan 27th, 2022 · · ·

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Thank you for taking the time to read and comment!

I especially liked the brevity of section v.

Thank you. Section V was an intentional choice. One: to draw attention to this turning point. Two: flow issues. Three: characterization: it happened but the OC can't say much about it. Four: to fit in with the spare style (discussed below). Five: there may have been other reasons but it has been a bit of time since I wrote it.

Throughout, I was experimenting with a spare style that I have seen some unique published authors employ, attempting to say much and evoke illustrative images with very few words. Essentially: literary parsimony.

PinoyPony

PinoyPony #6 · Jan 27th, 2022 · 1 · ·

I like the nod towards the engineering of the Collar. I find the ‘what-if’ scenarios were thought up for the collar very fascinating (just the engineer in me having a ~~heyday~~ hayday):

My holes are growing larger, but the collar won’t fall because it’s held with magic sensing if I can change, even though my porous neck it looks like it doesn’t belong.

Especially with the holes. I like the theory that the holes (at least the large ones) are a sign of love deficiency:

My Changeling holes have grown bigger and I am thin.

Ultimately, the social dynamic of having a ‘friendly’ Changeling amongst ponies is enough to get me. First, is the sustainable way:

I save bits, spent on gifts and food for ponies since their joy and love is *my* feast.

However, due to ravages of war, that commodity turns scarce. What happens if a need isn’t met? The starvation of that need drives the main character drives them to feed harmfully, and that winds them up in a prison camp..

What really stings is that the main character is powerless in their circumstances. Ask for it? In the climate of war? No chance. Send a message to the authorities of the dire situation? They have a war to worry about. Granting a Changeling sustenance is going to raise some eyebrows. So, in desperation, they give in to the only option left: take it by force.

Nicely done, Sparkling!

David olvera