A minor variation

by notMurphy

For want of a Battle: part iv

For Want of a Battle

4/5

...

---

Six ponies set forth with renewed determination, feeling that their goal was now close. Over the next rise they espied crumbling ruins, a large open room and a stunted tower remained standing; littered wreckage all that was left of the rest, covered in moss, grass, and vines.

"This must be the ancient 'Castle of the Pony Sisters'." Rarity said, feeling a touch of awe at finding such an artifact of Equestrian history just lying here... in the middle of an inhospitable jungle, guarded by monstrous beasts and cruel weather. 'Maybe... it's not so surprising nopony has ever tried to reclaim our history. I'll worry about history when we have a future again.'

"Royal Pony 'Sisters'? Who the hay were they?" Rainbow asked, trying to recreate the original structure in her mind.
"I'm not really sure, they're only referenced in the really ancient texts, the ones we have no complete copies of." 'Thanks again, your majesty, you've managed to make our own past a mystery to us. Oh, we could just ask you but Who would be Rude enough to Bother the Princess?' She rolled her eyes, 'Things were going to be different in the future, ohh yes they are.'

Fluttershy looked at the ruins, which seemed sad and lonely to her. 'Ponies used to frolic here, what happened?' "Well, what do you think of it, Diane?" She hadn't said more than four words to the odd pink pony. Not directly, anyway.

"I think this building should be condemned, there's serious weather fatigue in all the load-bearing stone columns, and... what?"

"I meant, can you believe there used to be a castle here?"
"I can believe twelve other impossible things in a day, why?"
"I... nevermind." 'Confound these ponies...'

---

"Hey, what about that weird thing up there?" Rainbow pointed to the abstract sculpture in the center of the courtyard, five spheres suspended in corroded metal cups radiating from a spherical central structure.

"I... ok, yes those are the items in question, but-"
"You said: you said 'Well, Rainbow Dash'," The pony in question put on her best 'high society snooty snoot' accent to imitate the increasingly irritated unicorn," 'if you FIND an artifact you can have a say in naming it.' And I did, so now you gotta-"

"There is absolutely no way I am calling the Elements of Harmony-"
"I think you mean the 'Flashworks Elements of Harmony', don't you?"
"This is an important piece of our history, you little twit! How can you expect me to-"
"Oh, Mare, you should see the look on your face. I'm just Buck'in with ya, I don't want you to rename 'em."
"Uh, 'scuse me? What do you mean, 'Buck'? That's what mah family does for a livin' an I don't appreciate you using it like a dirty word." Jackie pressed her face up against Rainbow Dash, glaring her in the eyes.

Rainbow backpedaled quickly, "Whoa, hay. I-I didn't mean it like-"
"Pfft! We use it that way all th' time, 'kin we get back to 'Saving the World' now?" Jackie made airhooves.

Twilight walked over to where the pegasi had piled the five spheres. "Ok, Rarity, we've found them, how do we use them?"

Rarity looked at the stones, unsure but unwilling to admit it. "The book said... that a 'spark' would reveal the last element. They were obviously referring to 'Magic' but I'm not sure... Well, leave it to me dear." Twilight prepared to speak, "Oh heavens, please don't offer to help me - that came out wrong - You are still recovering from your ... impressive display earlier, I couldn't conscience you getting hurt straining yourself. Please, this is what I do." 'Oh good, that mollified her. Huh, it certainly has been a while since I was genuinely worried about hurting somepony's feelings. I really hope I know what I'm doing...'

"Ok, Rarity's got the magic angle covered girls, let's give her some space so she can concent-"
"What on earth are you doing!? No, don't leave me here unguarded!" Rarity shouted, halting the retreating ponies, "Certainly, stay over by the walls there. But, really? Why would we set up a scenario where..."

A black wind began to rise from around the stones, swirling and gaining solidity as the stone spheres lifted from the ground and an eerie blue glow began to-

With a loud crash the magic cyclone burst apart as a flash of yellow and pink dived into it in a sharp counter-rotation. The spheres dropped back to the ground and the Nightmare hit the ground, far more surprised than injured. Surprise gave way to anger quickly. "How Darest Thou! To Strike Royalty Tis Punishable By Death!" Her mane crackled with raging arcane power.

"Nightmare Moon, mistress of darkness... we need to talk." Rarity said, holding one of the stone spheres in a hoof.
"FOAL, the time for talk will come when I descend upon you in vengeance and you beg for mercy."
"No, no, I'm quite fine here, your majesty. This is your court, after all, isn't it?"
"Thou seekest to use the Elements of Harmony 'pon us and then hast the temerity to beg Parley?"
"I can see I don't have your full attention, allow me to - oof! Fix that!" Rarity raised the stone above her head, both forehooves pulled back as far as they would reach.

Nighmare Moon looked on in disbelief. "You're joking, right?"
"Hiiya!" The white unicorn brought the mystical artifact down on it's other pieces, causing them to shatter into hundreds of tiny shards. "Sister, you have the wrong pony for humor." Rarity deadpanned.

"What is the meaning of this!? Dost Thee Seek to serve the Court of the Night?" The Lunar Mare was taken aback, she hadn't expected many to serve her voluntarily. This was a good sign, perhaps she could afford some leniency-

"No."
"NO?" Did the Nightmare seem... hurt?
"First of all, may I be the first to welcome you back to Equestria, princess of the moon." She gestured to the others, who had gathered at the edges, to come forward.

"y-your Majesty..." Twilight nearly choked on her tongue, biting back the bile she felt. 'This is for the best, we discussed this... But you make one move, ONE MOVE and I will tree you so hard you'll be spitting bark for the Next millennium.' "you, you have hurt my family and after this is over we're going to discuss that, but for now I... extend the same courtesy to you that I would to anypony who had been away from their home for so long."

"Ah kin understand feeling unappreciated when you return to a place you felt a part of an nopony wants to see you. Uh, your Highnessness."

"Ok, the armor's cool. You could work on the attitude though, seriously, but... welcome home Princess."
"We don't want to fight you, your Majesty, we just want what's best for everypony. Please accept our welcome."
"Welcome back. A thousand years is a long time, your highness, you might want to see what your subjects are like now before continuing... old policies."

The Nightmare was torn. Fealty of any stripe was a gift rarely offered her, but their obvious disrespect, their open defiance of her Glorious Eternal Night... some discipline was in order. "Who dost thou believe thyselves to be that thou may speak as such to Pony Royalty!?"

"Oh, we are but the new Bearers of the Elements of Harmony, your Majesty. You didn't REALLY think that hunks of rock could represent peace, love and tolerance, did you?" 'Don't smirk, for the love of all you hold dear, do not bait this one...'

"Twilight Sparkle, who used her powers to find a long lost sister even when she feared she would lose her home and friends represents the spirit of: Honesty"

"Diane Pie, who seeks to heal the sick and aid the weak while shunning personal recognition represents the spirit of: Kindness."

"Err.. Apple... Jackie... Orange who is able to find humor in adversity and sacrifices her own pride for the feelings of others represents the spirit of: Laughter ... don't ask."

"Rainbow Dash who continuously seeks to sacrifice her possessions, time, and energies to aid others - in what I can only assume is some sort of guilt triggered psychosis-"

"Can we skip the commentary, please?" Rainbow growled.

"-just sayin'. Represents the spirit of: Generosity."

"And 'Hurricane' Fluttershy whose single-minded devotion to the welfare of others leaves her as the only qualified candidate to be the spirit of: Loyalty."

"JOKING, THAT is What You're Doing, Correct? I... I can almost comprehend it. Thou hast not even named the sixth element."
"I was getting to that, but I don't really know how to explain-"

"Rarity Bell, loving sister and daughter," Twilight offered.
"Adoptive Mommy to a cute little dragon." Fluttershy added.
"Responsible adult who takes her obligations seriously," Diane muttered.
"A no-horseapples Mare you don't want to Buck with" Rainbow Dash quipped.
"A pony who sees her chances and is brave enough to take them," Jackie finished.

"I... is that really how you all see me?" The five nodded, smiling. "Those are probably the nicest, if most haphazard, things anyponies have ever said about me..." 'I'm not going to cry. Rarity Bell, you are not going to... oh darn it all.'

"SILENCE! WE HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS NONSENSE! Bow To Your Princess of the Night and be spared, defy me and be OBLITERATED! WE WILL Have Respect Or We Will Inspire Terror!"

"Ok, I've had enough of this. Princess Nightmare Moon, if you expect us to respect you, the first thing you need to do is stop throwing a tantrum. The second thing you must do is demonstrate that you deserve 'respect' by providing some yourself." Diane said her peace, waiting to be atomized afterwards.

Luck was with the pink pony and the Enraged Goddess was so angry she preferred shouting to smiting at this point. "ENOUGH I SAY, AGAIN! Thou sound'st like our Overbearing Sister!"

Six ponies stopped whatever backup plans they were preparing to stare anew at the Nightmare. As one voice they spoke, "SISTER!?"

---

"Thou art greater Foals than I had dared expect! Of course the superfluous Celestia is our sister."
"Oh, you have got to be kidding me!? This whole mess is some ... what, Goddess-sized version of a sibling spat? Do you realize how many ponies you've hurt in the process?" Twilight Sparkle had had enough. 'Enough and too much.' "I bet you have some stupid idea that by putting out the Sun you're going to 'force' ponies to love the night. Is that about right!?"

"When thou speakest it, it sounds less divine, but-"
"Yeah, well, news flash - Diane was right, things change! I for one always loved stargazing, of course you've just ruined that for me - any time I look at the Night Sky I'm going to see your stupid - stupid star hair!"

"Don't forget dance clubs, Sugarcube. Yeah, whole scene of dancin' that only starts after the Sun has set, lots of singing, ponies meeting friends and sometimes findin' somepony to go home with, if ya catch mah drift."

"S-such things are... such things are to be expected, and will continue under my reign."
"Nah, see, that's where you're wrong ... Princess. If it's always night, then there's nothing special about it. If there's nothing special about it, then what's there to celebrate?" Rainbow asked lazily.

"You see not, the Night is dwarfed by the Day! To truly flourish it must be-"
"Nothing flourishes in isolation. I... my entire childhood was spent around rocks. And yet, I learn of you and see a pony who was confined to a single rock. I'm so sorry, whatever you did, whatever you wanted to do, nopony deserves that." Diane let tears fall as they would, approaching the Mare of the Night.

"Urchin! K-keep thy distance, We warn but once!" They were converging from all sides now.
"You made your own sister hurt you, how that must have burned." Twilight tried to imagine doing something similar, her mind rebelled.

"F-for a thousand years... all you could do is watch," Fluttershy considered it and shuddered.
They just kept getting closer. "What do you WANT from us!? STAY BACK!" Nightmare Moon struck out at the pink one, who was almost breathing on her. She fell back, bouncing once, picked herself up, and trotted back again.

"You're going to... your ambitions are going to hurt a lot of ponies, and I don't think you're strong enough to survive the guilt... please, let us help you." Rainbow Dash begged.

"You wish to... if you wish to serve, STAY BACK!"
The unicorn, the white one, actually put hooves upon her! "Shhh... hush now, we don't need to shout at the ponies, let it out..." Rarity called on every technique she had ever used caring for her sister and Heathspike.

One by one the ponies held the Princess, surrounding her, making escape impossible. Her own powers seemed to betray her, her agitation so great she couldn't even dissipate to smoke. One final scream of rage and frustration and pain escaped her, and the six completed their circular group hug.

And then, the world exploded.

Comments

[Zephyrus Scary]

Very, very interesting... Love how you changed this scene, yet kept the "elements" of it (ha ha) the same. Now, hopefully, it has the same result... With the chapter titles as they are, I've been fearing that more will be changed than just the Mane Six's past and their Elements...

[iceykitsune]

Well, that was..... different.

[notMurphy]

1236198All will be revealed.
1236208 just a minor variation

Random thought for the day, anypony know if there's a PMV for Dishwara's 'Tell me all your thoughts (on God)'?
Not nearly as religious as the title suggests.
If they haven't and somepony who does those sorts of things is reading this, I see the CMCs and/or Pipsqueak and Princess Celestia/Luna in my head for this and it is PERFECT

[Grif_Bladefeather]

you = freaken awsome
this story = fraking sweet

[i_am_the_jam]

I was hoping something like this would happen in "Hoofed By Your Own Petard". Thank you so much!

[notMurphy]

1236620 No ser, You Rock
Edit: but, I'll try to live up to your opinion.

1236863 Always nice to be able to please somepony

Next update will be Saturday evening, the last part is taking a lot of editing and reworking. It must be... perfect

[Qussar]

'Howthefuckarentyougettingviews'
Now that thats out of the way , I Love You With a Passion Of a Hundred Burning Stars
Take my internets take them all

[notMurphy]

1242082 whatever mad compulsion keeps this story blasting out of my head doesn't seem to include writing a good Description blurb.
well, that explains why Chrome kept melting. had to switch to FireFox.

1245598 This was originally planned to be about 8 chapters. That's Chapters, period, no sub-chapters, no side stories. It just refuses to be resolved any faster than it's own pace, I'm along for the ride as much as you.

[tongen]

.... I better see me some Luna!

[inq101]

I have a rule. I never favourite or recommend a story until I have read the entire thing. You have just made me break that rule.

[Thegodhand]

And here I was hoping the difference would be that the elements formed symbols on their stomachs so they could all care bear stare her down.

[notMurphy]

1356718 ... ...
...
... I have no words.

[Shylyfly]

I love hom Pinkie still manages to break the forth wall by realizing what she does in the actual show... it"s hilarious.

[Joural]

I still maintain that Applejack and Twilight got in a fight because neither of them knew which was meant to be laughter.

just sayin'.

[ponyPharmacist]

Every time I see original ep.2 climax I shed little manly tear. But this... this is even more touching.

[notMurphy]

1639104 Thanks
There are plenty of Dark stories, and some of them are very good, but where are the Optimistic ones?
Something bad happens or the good doesn't, and then you pick yourself back up.
Life goes on, and it can always get better again, right?

[the other sans]

trying to recreated the original structure in her mind
"You said, you said 'Well, Rainbow Dash',"

1. Recreate.
2. Err... this part completely lost me

Hugs: The evolved form of kamikaze with less fatalities but some injuries* to date. Works better in groups.

*Note: Do not hug anything sharp

[Griseus]

Group hug Nightmare Moon? That's really crazy and I like it.

[katarjin]

1883938 aww so i cant hug this guy? HUGS

[The Gargoyle]

Your a fan of the world exploding eh? At least the second time that's happened.

Marvelous scene as well, you've simultaneously made it more practical/logical on the part of the ponies, and made it even more "loving/tolerating" then the original episode. Good job

[Puzzle Reader]

So, we got babysitter!Rarity taking down a mad goddess? That... is actually pretty epic.
But seriously, I like how they were all understanding at Nightmare Moon, that worked out well in the chapter.

[G-AB Acid]

I personally think that, Diane should be Honesty... though that would mess with Twi, as I don't particularly see her being Kindness.

Diane is definitely Honesty, though.

[Stella Dawn]

1476072 Wait,how?Can u tell me how she did it?

[Race9000]

So it was a group hug...

OF DOOM!

[fractalman]

DAWWWW!

[Pinklestia]

Wow... this was amazing.

[keaton-furman-prower]

And so, they loved and tolerated the shit out of Nightmare Moon

[The REAL Mister Pkmn]

HUGS: they defeat all evil.

[TheGreatEater]

That's what mah family does for a livin' an I don't appreciate you using it like a dirty word.

if ya catch mah drift.

my
____________

"First of all, may I be the first to welcome you back to Equestria, princess of the moon."

"y-your Majesty..."

Cap.
_______________

"Ah kin understand feeling unappreciated when you return to a place you felt a part of an nopony wants to see you. Uh, your Highnessness."

I
__________________

"Ok, the armor's cool. You could work on the attitude though, seriously, but... welcome home Princess."
"We don't want to fight you, your Majesty, we just want what's best for everypony. Please accept our welcome."
"Welcome back. A thousand years is a long time, your highness, you might want to see what your subjects are like now before continuing... old policies."

you need to state who is talking.
__________________

6708078

Yes, yes they do.

[AppleTank]

Fluttershy: This was not my fault!

Also, proof that Twilight likes violence too much for her own good.

[ChAoS pOnY]

"I meant, can you believe there used to be a castle here?" "I can believe twelve other impossible things in a day, why?" "I... nevermind." 'Confound these ponies...'

Is it just me or is pinkie pie channeling granny weatherwax from the discworld books?

[KvAT]

And then, the world exploded.

What's that, the second time this century?