• Member Since 12th Aug, 2012
  • offline last seen Feb 9th, 2022

SwedeBrony


I am an 20 year old Brony living in Sweden currently hoping to get into University. One of my favorite hobbies are to write and that is what I do here on this site. Hope you enjoy :)

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Hyper feather never had any friends growing up except for one dark blue pegasus that he can't remember the name of. After growing up Hyper moves to ponyville and one day volunteers in a Science project hoping to contribute to the project. But after something goes wrong with the machine Hyper is reminded of his long forgotten friend. But he can't remember neither the ponies name nor when he first met him. Hyper then start hearing things that he knows isn't real and start to wounder if being alone have driven him a bit insane or if something strange is hapening.

Chapters (3)
Comments ( 6 )

alrighty.

wall o text. hard to read. space it a bit more.

New lines when a different character speaks.

also he seems really quick to accept that he's possibly going nutty.

Hoping that this'll get better i'll keep an eye on it.

Good luck.

Okay thank you for the helpfull tips as you might have guessed im not exactly a writer. To be honest this is the first time i ever write a fan-fic so i will follow your advice and try to improve as much as possible :twilightsmile:

Once again i apologise for anyone that is actually reading this because first English is not my main language so there will be a lot of spelling errors and i know the story is probably cliché and dumb but as i have stated before i am not a writer but i just wanted to give it a chance.

K i'm liking that it's slowed down a lil. Also it's not a recipe or receipt or whichever word you were trying to type, it would be a prescription that the doctor wrote out. i know English isn't your first language i'm just givin ya some help here. Otherwise i'm liking where this is going confused as to how while he was sleeping the other pony was somehow on the roof since i expected them to share the same body. but hey it's your story.

Yeah as i stated i am really sorry for all the spelling errors and such and i guess its kinda when the story start to come by itself i sometimes forgett what words i should use. And as for why the other pony was on the roof you if you keep reading i will get to it and i promise you when you read it you im sure you will almost sigh at how cliché it actually is or at least how cliché it is in my mind.

So the last chapter is finally done. And in my honest opinion it turned out horrible. And i think it will be a long while before i ever try my hand at writing ever again.

But as always creative criticism is welcome.

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