Twilight's Revenge

by Violet Shade

My Punishment

After killing Celestia I was captured and hauled down to the dungeon. I never once imagined that I would go from being Celestia's protege to being locked up in the dungeon. This is all Celestia's fault! Had she just let the friendship letter slide I would still have my freedom and she would still be alive but oh no, she just had to screw up the lives of two ponies! Well it is too late for that now, what is done is done.

The following morning arrived and the guards came down to get me and lead me to the throne room where I was greeted by an extremely angry Luna. I have seen Luna angry before but if looks alone could kill, I would be dead.

She yelled, "Twilight Sparkle, how could you just kill my sister?"

I yelled back, "Because she kicked me out of school solely for being late with a friendship letter. She didn't care where I would live and she took my friend and assistant away from me!"

Luna levitated me to her and growled, "Well Twilight, you killed my sister and now you must answer for your crime."

I asked, "Wait a minute, don't I get a trial? You can't just punish me without a trial!"

Luna snapped, "Wrong Twilight Sparkle. You were caught by the royal guard in Celestia's room, over her butchered body with a knife. Normally a crime such as this would be followed up with a trial but given the royal guard caught you AND you killed my sister, your guilt has already been proven and now you must answer for your crime."

Well this is not good, not good at all. Here I thought that killing Celestia for her tyrannical actions would be something I could get away with but I guess this is what I get for allowing raw emotion to dictate my actions. Now I stood in front of not just Celestia, but the guards who had caught me the night before. Before Luna would make a decision on what she would do to me, she did want to get some information from the guards.

She asked one of them, "I know you caught Twilight with a knife in my sister's bedroom standing over her blood soaked body. Besides that, what else did you see?"

The guard replied, "Well that is pretty much all we saw. We did not arrive soon enough to see her stabbing her."

Luna asked, "What caused you to go check on my sister to start with?"

The guard replied, "I heard screaming coming from her bedroom and I was wondering what was going on. When I saw Twilight with that knife standing over your sister, I was horrified."

Luna developed a scowl on her face and turned to me. She asked, "Twilight, I want to know exactly why you would do such a thing. I want to know why you killed my sister."

This was something that I really didn't want to answer but I thought that perhaps if I am truthful with her, that perhaps my punishment will not be as harsh. I yelled, "Just like I said before, because she kicked me out of school because I was late getting her a friendship report! She kicked me out not caring where I would live. She tossed me aside over something trivial and menial! Wouldn't you want to do the same if you were in my situation?"

Luna replied, "No Twilight Sparkle, I would not and I especially would not kill my sister." She approached me and continued, "Twilight Sparkle, what you did was completely unlike what I would think you would do. This was an act of irrational emotion on your part...."

I interrupted, "Wait a minute. Ponies are often forgiven for crimes the commit when they are emotionally distraught!"

Luna snapped, "Not for murder Twilight and the fact that you not only killed the ruler of all of Equestria but were caught in the act of doing it, this emotional thing you bring up does not apply here." I tried to respond but she continued, "And because of what you have done Twilight, I have no choice but to punish you."

This really pissed me off and caused me to answer in anger, "So, what are you going to do? Kill me the same way I killed your sister? Have me executed in the town square."

Luna stood there in thought before replying, "While that would be what I would want to do, I have decided that execution would be going easy on you. Instead of that I have decided that an eternal banishment to the sun would be a far better punishment."

She grabbed me in her aura and dragged me outside to do this. I should have known that something like this would happen. I should have known that I would get caught and be punished in a horrible way. She said that execution would be going easy on me and I think she is right. An eternal banishment on the sun will be far worse, not to mention uncomfortably hot.

Luna cast the proper spell and now here I am stuck on the sun. It is horribly hot and horribly bright. I honestly think that this is likely the worst punishment that could be given to anypony. I do remember one thing though, Celestia claimed that she banished Nightmare Moon to the moon forever and stars eventually aided in her escape. Perhaps if I am lucky a total solar eclipse will free me and I can return to Equestria. If that does indeed happen, I will likely have to hide out in the Everfree Forest because I know Luna would send me right back if I were caught.

Comments

[erias velam]

Well, if you think she said it as a joke or just hoping you learned something, but you forgot about it, you spent months without knowing anything, waking up being stabbed. Well I would have that surprise, that you put a situation that is angry with everyone good ... and not realize that part was their fault. Just blaming everything on someone, is something that many do. The situation she started it but the punishment was exesive, as no one opposes celestia forget one of the consequences, I think, but if you write stories where twilight is angry with all. Well I think the going is going to be very bad. But for the 3 syndromes she had. I hope more and by the way I like my hand up.

[StormLuna]

I have a suggestion, write a story where an eclipse does free Twilight. (Aug. 21 perhaps?) What you choose to have happen to her is your choice BUT I would suggest you have her reformed the way Nightmare Moon was. Perhaps have Luna forgive her and have her friends admit to her that they should have taken her problems seriously.

[Huk]

The pacing seems very rushed...

One minute, Twilight was being punished, the other we saw her after a few months living with Rarity (and no explanation was given why... I mean, seriously - you would think that Element Of Magic, could easily find a good job and live on her own). The next minute, she is already stabbing Celestia, and then it's THE END.

Also, the story seems very linear - no plot twists, etc. Honestly, when I was reading the second chapter, I was like "OK, so now something is going to happen! Celestia will tell her this was a joke, or that she is immortal and can't be killed by stabbing or something" but nothing did

So, some friendly suggestions for the future:

1. Expand, don't rush.
2. If something seems odd, try to explain why (Twilight living with Rarity for months, not renting her own house etc.)
3. Add plot twists!

Hope this helps

[StormLuna]

Now I stood in front of not just Celestia, but the guards who had caught me the night before.

How? I thought Celestia was dead.

[Maxsteele]

Something I don't understand, shouldn't Princess Luna understand how Twilight Sparkle feels as Princess Celestia didn't try to understand her when she turned into Nightmare Moon and banished her to the moon. As someone who felt anger first hand and because Twilight was the 1st person to forgive her, shouldn't she forgive Twilight and together find a way to bring Princess Celestia back? Also Princess Celestia died way too easily and she could've easily defused the situation and calm Twilight down without bad stuff happening.