• Published 20th Mar 2016
  • 4,283 Views, 159 Comments

Why so VG? - dereturd



Vanoss and Delirious starts rough in Equestria. And gets even more rough.

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New Ranks and Reputations

"COCKADOODLE-TOO!!"

The loud noise finally got Applejack to wake up. She sits up in an instant and stretches her legs upwards.

She yawned. The sunlight rayed over her face.

"Mornin' Equestria!" She cried out.

She got out of her bed and her hooves on the floor. She proceeded to walk downstairs and into the dining room. She opened the refrigerator and grabbed eggs using her hoof. Luckily, there was a bowl already prepared. She puts down the eggs for a soft landing. She turned on the stove. Then proceeded to put some cooking oil.

This was always normal for her.

The door swung open. Or more likely the door smacked. Noticed, she walked to the door before continuing to cook. She found the newspapers.

"Well, suppose the papers ar' here early." She said to herself.

She grabbed the papers. Flipping it.

She gasped.

Jewelry store in Vanhoover. Robbed. 15 wounded.

The headline read.

Now this day wasn't normal.

Normally, her days would've went with.
Breakfast-Work-Hangover-Work-Dinner-Sleep. But this time, her schedule was changed.

"Who would do such thing?" She yelled at herself.


Vanoss continued to load the magazines with bullets. Preparing for a heist.

Normally in Los Santos, their guns would've been loaded with ammo already and just grab some magazines from their crotches.

But this was realistic.

Even though they are in pony bodies of themselves and in Equestria with a power to respawn. They still had logic.

It was their enemy.

The sounds of magazines and gun cackling shook the room. He finally proceeded to load the pistols. He grabs his Carbine Rifle and sheathes it in his crotch.

"Oh shit!!" A voice yelled.

Delirious fell and smacked into the door opening it, his hatchet by his hoof. He raises his head. Seeing Vanoss just staring at him with his owl mask.

"Delirious, we can get caught by those pesky ponies just by you screaming." Vanoss said to Delirious.

"Hey it wasn't my fault who left a sticky bomb on the floor you fuck!" Delrious replied angrily. While Vanoss cringed.

Delirious was supposed to handle the melee weapons. He just puts them on the trunk of their Insurgent. Hatchets, machetes, knives, broken bottles, hammers and crowbars.

Vanoss approached the shelf and wore his vest. He glanced at the weapon above.

The minigun.

He grabbed it, but just fell on the ground while Delirious just watched. Vanoss unaware.

"That's why Lui can only carry them." Delirious laughed.

"You think." He replied.


"Applejack, you okay?" The first thing Applebloom said to her sibling.

"No." She replied firmly.

"What's the matter?" Applebloom asked.

"I..I can't.. Listen sugarcube." She started.

"Have we ever had ponies robbing some places?" She asked while her young sister shook her head.

"Well. Just last night we did."

Her sister gasped.


"Delirious you ready?" Vanoss asked his friend.

"Yeah. Ready." The pegasus replied, adjusting his mask.

The Insurgent drove the streets of midnight Vanhoover. Princess Luna however isn't taking guard this time due to some thing she has to attend to. Giving the duo a perfect opportunity.

Finally the vehicle stopped by an alley beside a Jewelry store. The two went out of the cars and to the back of the vehicle opening the trunk. Getting access to their weapons. Delirious grabbed his Silenced Pistol while Vanoss grabbed his metallic baseball bat. Even though they had almost all their weapons in their inventory. They still need their necessary equipment.

They stopped by a big vent.

"Delirious, no turning back now." Vanoss said.

"Yeah right, I've had fuckin' enough!" The blue pegasus kicked the vent open. While Vanoss grabbed a phone out of his side.

Delirious crawled through the vent. Vanoss used his phone to disable the cameras for a while. Delirious checked the other side of the vent and pointed out his silenced pistol. Proceeded to shoot the surveillance cameras, destroying it. He kicked the vent open again. Got out of crawling as Vanoss followed. Delirious grabbed a bobby pin from himself, just as how he learned in Fallout 4. He also took out a screwdriver as well.

"Vanoss, check the back for a while." He said, while Vanoss nodded.

The red earth pony turned the knob of the backdoor as it opened. He walked left to see boxes and a surveillance camera. Luckily he disabled it. He grabbed his pistol and shot the object. He checked his phone again as a red box with an exclaimation point was beside the timer.

"Thought ponies never had created advanced technology." He said to himself.

Delirious finally opened the case filled with pure jeweled accessories. His thoughts subsided, grabbing his gym bag, he snatches all accessories from the container and into the bag. He closed the case and proceeded with the next one.

Vanoss opened the boxes to see some necklaces and some jewels. He noticed a cabinet beside it.

He pondered.

He carefully opened the drawer (to know if it's a trap or not) only to look at grand pile of bits.

"Jackpot." He said as he grabs as much as possible and into the bag until it was depleted.

Delirious cracked open the 2nd case. Which was also the final one in this building. He did the same procedure--grab and go--carefully closing the case and his bag. He looked at the open backdoor.

"Vanoss, where the fuck are you?" He said in a low tone.

"I'm done!" Vanoss said back with two filled bits in the saddlebags.

"Let's get the fuck outta here!" Vanoss followed him through the vent, closing it. They finally got out of the jewelry store, Vanoss was still busy closing the other vent while Delirious was on the back laying down the bags. The duo immediately returned to the vehicle with a flawless heist.

"Hell yeah man!" Vanoss yelled inside the Insurgent as he starts the vehicle, driving away from the building.

"Hell yeah right dude! We did it!" Delirious said, hoofbumping their hooves.

"I think we became Unreachable Robbers." Vanoss said as a 'ding!' rang on his phone.

He grabbed his device and looked to see he and Delirious ranked up.


Applejack finished with her breakfast. The other ponies AND her friends had to know this right? She left Sweet Apple Acres, while trotting to Ponyville. The first pony(ponies) to bump into was Bon Bon and Lyra.

"Woah Applejack you okay? We're just about to spread the news." Bon Bon first talked.

"Yah Bon Bon. Ah know this already. Ah just read it right after Ah woke up." She told.

"Ok, let's see how others react to it." Lyra said as the two walk away from the cowpony whilst Applejack adjusts her stetson.

She then came across Pinkie Pie, who was walking by with an abstain expression.

She looks dead to others.

"Pinkie." Applejack called out as the pink pony glanced at her with a creepy look. Applejack took steps back.

"Yeah, I saw and read the news! How's that going to make my day?!" She yelled at her friend.

She wasn't normal. Definitely and obviously.

When she always reads tragic events on newspapers, she either shrugs it off or just never talk about it.

This one was different though.

"My Pinkie senses just went wild!!" She yelled at Applejack and ignored her dark-self.

"Like how?" The cowpony asked.

"A grand amount of pinchy knee!" Pinkie replied.

"Oh Pinkie, Applejack! Have you read the news today?" Rarity said from nowhere with almost a calm tone.

"I had the biggest pinchy knee I ever had!" Pinkie said again while Rarity faints.

"Say what now?!" A voice said, revealing to be Rainbow Dash.

"A pinchy since when?" Another voice said out, as she was Fluttershy.

"Midnight." She answered.

"Then isn't that the time when the robbers robbed the store?" The final voice called out again, as it was only Twilight.

"Oh my gosh!"

Author's Note:

Hehey! Welcome to the new youtube story!

Don't worry I'll still update They Call Me Sky, alright! Jeez.

Also be on a lookout for this one, it'll be dark as hell.