• Member Since 25th Jan, 2016
  • offline last seen Jun 28th, 2016

Pony Fan 4 Ever


I love MLP and MLP fandom

E

Ever since becoming a princess, Twilight's life had changed a little bit. Twilight is admired among thousands, and a lot have always wanted to be around her for popularity. But in the end, her friends are always right where she needs them (takes place after Twilight's Kingdom).

Chapters (3)
Comments ( 11 )

ahhhh.... a relaxing story for once. really nice story! :twilightsmile:
keep it up!

Not bad, but PLEASE get yourself an editor. Your verb tenses and punctuation is atrocious.

Awww... :pinkiesad2:

I loved the lesson learned at the end, and the happily ever after part.

Keep up the good work! :twilightsmile:

6999419

Thank you! :pinkiehappy: The "happily ever after" end just seemed right. Will write more soon!:raritywink:

"Oh," Twilight saw that Golden Harvest is disappointed. For some strange reason, it annoyed her slightly. As Golden Harvest walked away, Twilight began to get lost in her thoughts again. Finally she made the decision to go to Sweet Apple Acres to help out Applejack instead.
As you trot to Sweet Apple Acres, Applekjack spots you, and starts waving to you.
"Twilight!" Applejack exclaims.
"Applejack!" You greet back. "I've decided to help you out in your chores. Figured you'd need a helping hoof."
"Gee, thanks, Twilight!" Applejack thanked you. "Especially today. Business's been pretty hectic. Ah sure could use a helping hoof."\
Twilight smiled, and then followed Applejack into the farm.

First you use Twilight... then, you used "you"...

so Twilight don't wan to disturb her.

doesn't want

But then Twilight wonder if Pinkie Pie also needed your help. You know thats she has to bake an awful lot of things for the customers.

what's with the need YOUR help?
* Twilight knew that Pinkie had to bake an awful lot of things for the costumers

then with applejack.

than

excersize

exercise

I'm not very good at English since my country speak a different language but i'm just trying to point out some mistakes.. :pinkiesmile::pinkiehappy: just to.. help you a bit? :twilightsmile:

6999424 I notice you placed this in 'Cannon', I assume you got Ink's approval first.

6999424 You know my earlier comment, it was written before reading this. After reading this, I have to ask, where is Midnight Storm? The Witching Hour group is dedicated to stories that feature her, and I don't see her here. If you just wanted to advertise your story, you should have used the forum.

7039371
No, the author hasn't, and I also have to ask where Midnight Storm is in this story.


6999424
Please understand that stories that only stories that happen in the Witchingverse are allowed into The Witching Hour Group, and that cannon stories (those approved by myself) go in the cannon folder. When Midnight or another character from The Witching Hour is involved with your story, you may add it to another folder. Thank you for your understanding and cooperation.

7039403 Didn't think so, I'll just remove this and set it so that only admins can post in the 'Cannon' folder.

7039435 I set it for contributors instead of admins, but the point still remains.

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