A cheerful tune drifted through Carousel Boutique. It blended with the soft jingle of windchimes outside. Brightly colored bolts of cloth sparkled in the sunlight as it scattered through the store's glass windows. Finely dressed mannequins stood silently in audience to the song like a crowd of sophisticates at an opera. In the middle of it all, seated upon a comfortable red cushion, Rarity hummed while she worked.
The white unicorn made careful use of her hooves, teeth and magic to work her needle through the yellow fabric of a spring dress. Garnet studs came into place along the hem, and she planned to decorate the clasp with a fiery ruby.
Rarity's humming subsided as she heard a hoof knock against her front door. “Is that you, Twilight?” she called, stowing her work away. “Do come in.”
The door opened as Twilight Sparkle stepped inside. “Thank you for letting me drop in like this, Rarity,” she said, taking care to wipe her hooves on the welcome mat before stepping into the boutique proper. “I know you've been busy lately.”
“Oh, nonsense,” Rarity replied, helping her friend hang her saddlebags near the door. “I always have time for my friends.” The white unicorn then trotted lightly off toward the kitchen. “What kind of tea would you like, dear?”
Twilight smiled gratefully. “Anything is fine, thank you.”
A few minutes of running water, rattling pots, and finally whistling kettles ensued before Rarity returned, levitating two steaming cups before her. The two unicorns each found themselves a perch of cushions and pillows and got comfortable.
“So,” Rarity said, stirring a lump of sugar into her cup, “what brings you to my humble abode?”
Twilight took a careful sip. “Ooh, this tea is delicious!”
“You like it? It's a special blend you can only get in Canterlot. There's this darling little tea shop--” Rarity stopped herself, unwilling to let Twilight sidetrack her.
The lavender mare grinned sheepishly. “Okay, okay. You caught me, I didn't come here to talk about tea.” She took another sip. It really was good tea, though. “I came here because... well, I think I have a crush.”
Stars glistened in the corners of Rarity's eyes. “Oh, Twilight, that's marvelous! Tell me all about her!”
“Well, I—,” Twilight began, before blinking a couple of times. “Wait, why do you just assume it's a 'her?'“
Rarity gave an airy laugh. “Darling, I don't know how subtle you think you've been, but you've had 'filly-fooler' written all over your face since day one!”
Twilight's cheeks flushed dark red. “Rarity!” she hissed.
“Pardon my crude language, of course,” she added, taking a sip from her cup. “But it's true. Since you arrived in Ponyville, I don't think I've heard you say more than three words to any stallion that wasn't your brother.”
Twilight set her teacup down and stood up. “Nevermind,” she said, turning toward the door.
“Oh, sit down, will you? I'm only teasing,” Rarity said.
Twilight paused, then gave an exasperated sigh as she sank back down onto the pillows.
“That's it, dear. You came here to tell me about this crush of yours because you and I both know I can help.” Rarity brought her cup to her lips, but froze. “Unless... dear Celestia, it isn't me, is it?”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “No, Rarity, I don't have a crush on you.”
The white unicorn breathed a sigh of relief. “Not that I wouldn't... appreciate your affections if it were, mind you, I just would like to believe you're bright enough not to go barging into a pony's home and just say it. That would be far too forward.” Rarity's eyes fixed themselves to some point beyond the walls of the boutique. “No, you would need to start with something like an innocent invitation to a friendly dinner-date. We would talk and laugh over our salads and wine, and then we would take a detour through the park as we walked back home. As the sky above us glows with the time of day that is your namesake, you would lean in close and whisper—“
“Oka—y,” Twilight interrupted, laughing nervously. “I am going to pretend I heard none of that.”
Rarity coughed into her hoof. “Ahem... besides, poor Spike would be just devastated.” A long, awkward silence filled the room. “So, is it anypony I know?”
Twilight nodded. “Yes, you know her very well.”
Rarity clapped her hooves on the tiles in excited glee. “I knew it was a 'her!' “
The purple unicorn shot an annoyed glare at her friend.
Rarity folded her hooves under herself and focused her attention on her tea. “Go on.”
Twilight took another sip. “Well, it started when I realized that she'd always been there for me. No matter where I went, there she was.”
Rarity gasped. “Pinkie Pie?” she squeaked. Twilight cocked her eyebrows. “No? Oh, nevermind, then. So you're close?”
“Oh yes, very close,” Twilight continued. “We hang out together all the time.”
A big grin spread across Rarity's face. “I always thought you and Rainbow Dash would make the most adorable couple!”
“It's not Rainbow Dash,” Twilight said flatly.
“Really?” Rarity rubbed her chin with a hoof. “I could have sworn... hmm.” Rarity tried to sip thoughtfully from her cup, but found it completely empty. “Tell me, does this lucky mare suspect anything? Is she aware that she has stolen my dear Twilight's heart?”
“Oh, I think she knows,” Twilight said, twirling a hoof against the floor. “I don't think I could hide anything from her if I tried.”
“Is it Fluttershy?”
“No.”
“You're absolutely positive it isn't Rainbow Dash?”
“It isn't Rainbow Dash!”
“Applejack?”
“Now you're just going down the list of all our friends.”
Rarity pouted. “Well I simply must know, darling! Tell me, who could have drawn the gaze of Twilight Sparkle?”
Twilight finished her cup of tea and set it carefully down on the floor. “Well...” A wind began swirling through the boutique. Thread and needles left the tables to dance in the air. The room was suddenly filled with a blinding light.
Zwip!
When the light and wind faded, Rarity was faced with not one but two Twilight Sparkles. The new Twilight wore an eyepatch and her mane was all frizzy.
Rarity stammered. “T-Twilight, what is going on?”
The Twilight without an eyepatch stood up. “Rarity, I am now dating myself. My future-self, that is.” Future Twilight gave her past self a playful nip on the ear. “Oh, me,” Past Twilight said, pushing Future Twilight away with her hoof.
The eyepatch-wearing mare grinned and spoke. “I realized, 'hey, here's a pony who likes all the same things as I do. She can keep up with me when I talk about my research, and it won't bother her if I snore!”
Rarity stood dumbfounded. “I—you, uh, wha—?”
Past Twilight giggled. “Plus, the eyepatch is pretty hot, don't you think?”
Rarity's eyes lost focus and she collapsed in a heap on the pillows.
*-*-*
The two Twilights stepped out of Carousel Boutique, laughing. Future Twilight looked to her left with a smug expression on her face. In the bushes outside the window, Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash stood staring, their jaws hanging nearly to the ground. “That,” she said to them, “is how you do a real prank.” In a flash of light and a gust of wind, Future Twilight disappeared.
The remaining Twilight Sparkle held out her hoof. “All right girls, I won. Pay up.”
Pinkie and Rainbow dug through their saddlebags and produced some bits.
Twilight grinned as she began mussing up her mane. “Oh, and Pinkie, do you mind if I borrow one of your emergency eyepatches? I need to go help a friend settle a bet.”
Voila, my first fic.
Do you think I should put a Romance tag on this? It isn't exactly a romance, but it plays at being one for most of the story.
Good Christ..this was actually really funny. No, don't put a romance tag. I think comedy fits it well.
Oh wow. Wasn't expecting that at all.
Well. I like it. You could have made it longer. But it definitely worked in the end. I'll give you.
Goodness, that was amusing!
And, no - don't misuse the tags. You have them perfect as is.
This was amazing; I loved the whole thing. I don't think it needs a romance tag, but if you want to use one, it's up to you.
I like the personality of Twilight at the end. She isn't normally like that, but she could be, and ponies (like people) surprise me all the time.
I lol'd so hard. Brilliant job man. You've just earned a watch.
Thanks. I agree it is too short, but whenever I try to add anything to it it just feels like it breaks the pacing and makes it drag.
I think we can all agreed. Prankster Twilight is best prankster pony.
That last line.
I think you've won something, but I'm not sure what...
heehooha
Using time travelling for a prank? Sounds legit.
I wtf'd very hard. Make me a favor and go get urself a nice treat for this fic. Loved it still do.
I...wait...with the...in the back of...mint jelly...kaleidoscope...
-ERROR
ERROR
ERROR
I think you broke a reader.
Baha!
Now that was a twist, this was an entertaining read
Hahaha that was brilliant!
GENIUS. Simply Genius. I'm laughing like a madman xD
Lmao, you broke my brain for a second there; that was really funny. :)
Seems slightly out of character for Twilight at the end but I could still imagine her doing that so it works just fine anyway. Definitely doesn't need to be longer. It works great for what it is. A short, funny, one off story about a prank. I thinks no romance tag just so as not to be confusing but thats just me. You get one thumb up for I can only give just the one. So have some mustaches as well
Oh, brilliant.
Just one thing, you couldve made the whole porting in thing a bit more obvious. As it was, I nearly missed it.
Just seemed a bit like a foot note, y'ken?
As soon as future Twilight entered... my head just kind of exploded. Really good, and I laughed my face into the desktop screen. Very good job!
Ain't no other pony that can troll like me!
Definitely don't need to add anything. It is perfect.
“Oh, me,” Past Twilight said...
mlkshk.com/r/9X3U
Haven't laughed like this in a long time. Good job.
That was brilliant!
Oh dear
...
I'll admit the second I read the "dating myself" line, I let out the weirdest yelp/laugh sound; thanks for that
A+. 10/10. Would read again
Ha! That was pretty great... Plus, Twilight certainly learned a lot about how Rarity views her, didn't she?
Indeed, but the payback, in the form of the prank, was undeniably awesome. Could stand to get a bit of jaw-drop from Dash/Pinkie, but still, well done.
731760 It's classier to just have one tag.
"Well written" I say. It is clear why people like this.
I almost feel bad giving you a thumbs up, because that "100" looks so perfect.
I read this aloud and did the character's voices as I went, but I think this story would have been fun any way I sliced it.
At first I was like
But then I was like
That was absolutely perfect. One of the most well-made fics I've read in a long time.
735814 might have something to say about that....
Sweet Celestia, that's the best fanfic I think I've ever had to spend 3 days hunting down to re-read... Actually, it's the only one I've been dedicated enough to scrounge for... My point is, I think I can die happy now. Great job!
1262440
I am pleased you feel it was worth that kind of effort. Although, even if it's happy, I hope you can hold off on dying for a little bit. I don't want it to look like I'm trying to inflate my numbers by putting dead people on my watch list.
files.sharenator.com/Brilliant_Craziest_Bridge_Design_Ever-s650x520-66502-580.png
I lol´d how she asked again if it surely isn´t Rainbow Dash.
Epic prank, those bits are well spend Pinkie and Dashie. XDDD
oh i totally did not see that coming lol
Oh wow, this is just fantastic. Well worth a spot on my user page wall of awesome stories.
That is the best twist ending I have ever read in a fic of this length. I mean...and so original! You've done amazing.
......wow xD You got me with a double twist. I was like 'forreal' and then
Very amusing.
That was hilarious! I had no idea something this short could be that funny. The timing was excellent, the idea was cackleworthy, the dialogue was spot on, and you made me laugh out loud more than once. Very well done for your first fic!
Okay, that was pretty Celestia-darned funny! And the guy above, Ponky, this ISN'T their first fic you know.
1488055 Well, it is and it isn't my first fic. Chapter one of this was the first thing I published here on FimFic, but I put up my other five stories in the span of time between that and chapter two.
fucking, BRILLIANT!
I did not expect that outcome.... Loved it^^
thereaction of Rarity.... PRICELESS!!!
s7.postimage.org/6zc6cugtz/what_a_twist.jpg
I can honestly say, I did not see that one coming!
Really love the first chapter, very funny and well-written, too.
*stunned* That was perfect. Mostly cuz I can almost kinda see Twilight at least considering it.
I never laugh out loud at MLP fanfiction, but when Future Twilight showed up I started cracking up. That was funny!
muhahahahahaahahahaha
I have think Sweetie Bell, to the start