• Member Since 9th Jun, 2014
  • offline last seen October 6th


Kodi Arfer, psychological scientist


One day, Applejack and Big McIntosh are alone in an orchard when Big Mac laments the problems of his love life. Then the conversation takes an odd turn, with big consequences for AJ and Big Mac's relationship.

The title and description of this story are deliberately misleading.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 4 )

"Blossomforth." he grunted.
"Your new gal?" AJ said with a chuckle.

Big Mac gets any mare he wants.

"Don't tell me she found somepony else?"
"Eeyup." said Big Mac through gritted teeth. "She tried to hide it, too.

You. Do NOT. Do that, to an Apple.

"What's wrong with me, AJ? Don't I deserve better than all that?"

He certainly does.

"Tell me, Big Mac."
"What in tarnation? Why not?"

He said Nope. That is all you are getting.

You're reliable as a mountain, and beautiful as the day. I won't settle for nothin' less."

Good taste in mares.

"We still need to find you a good mare, though. Y'know, I should set you up with a pegasus friend 'a mine. She's a champ flier, and I know you like athletic gals…"

:derpytongue2:Best clumsy pony of course.

6014544 Hmm, Derpy × Big Mac does make a certain amount of sense in that neither of them talk much, albeit for very different reasons.

6014554 I once read something where both of them have speech therapy with Dr. Whooves(no blue box of any kind). Big Mac's has his old stutter completely under control. Derpy's problems, not so much.
Also consider how they both have the best backsides in town. Her butt's made of dark matter, and he could crush coal into diamonds with his hinds.

Excellently done. I love how you took the "standard" interpretation of intimacy and reminded it it had a more sane and less reckless older brother.

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