Twilight can't deny the fact the Princess of the Night is her true love
Chapters (1)
- Member Since 16th Aug, 2014
- offline last seen May 30th, 2019
SkaterStreak
I'm just going to be adorable and me! C:
SkaterStreak
Joined 16th Aug, 2014 ·
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I like the concept, and you seem to have a good idea of where you want this to go, but I feel as though this needs some editing grammar and "feel" wise.
(Feel wise meaning when something is technically correct, but doesn't "feel" right when you say it. Like Robin and Batman, or other pairs that are generally said in a specific pattern.)
I hope I didn't offend you in any way. This was not intended to be offensive or hateful. If you stick by your story and your writing abilities, I understand, and will respect your decision.
To be honest, it seems like Luna thought she have to be her Marefriend, as a kind of payment, but i think you meant that she wants to be together with Twilight right?
She did? I thought Twilight was the one that asked her this, but then again i am already not sure about how Luna meant what she said to Twilight.
I can´t say that much right now, but i keep track of the story and read a few more chapters, because i think i could like it.
Lmfao Ik i made a ton of grammar errors...
It shall be edited soon
new chapter please