Trixie yawned and stretched as she slowly awoke. After finishing up with Brady Culture a month ago, Trixie had recovered slowly. Max and Sam had taken to letting her sleep however long she wanted, and to keeping the noise down until she was awake. Also as per usual, she found a breakfast waiting for her on a shoulder height tray - shoulder height on her, anyway - with the food cut up into bite size pieces for her. Smiling, she buried her face in her plate, devouring her meal messily. Once finished, she washed up in a basin set out for her, then held a drying cloth in her hooves to dry off. She then went upstairs to ask her Daddy to brush her mane just right. Not that she hadn't recovered enough to do it herself already, but she enjoyed having him spoil her.
Halfway up the stairs, she nearly bumped into Sam and Max coming downstairs. "Good, you're awake!" Sam said happily. "We have another case!"
Trixie grinned eagerly. She hoped to prove herself just as well on this case as she did the last one. "What's the case?" she asked.
"Myra Stump's holding her entire audience hostage!" Max proclaims.
"You mean the annoying talk show host?" Trixie asked. "The one who mothers everybody whether they like it or not?"
"Exactly!" Sam proclaims. "We need to get to the TV station immediately or at our earliest convenience."
"When we beat her up, can Trixie have her hair?"
"We'll see," Sam allowed.
"Can we stop at Bosco's before we go?" Trixie asks. "Trixie wants candy."
"Certainly!" Max replied. "And on the way there, I can brush your mane and tail how you like it!"
Trixie smiled happily as Max picked her up, grabbing her brush, hat, and cape.
On entering Bosco's shop, all three of them were caught off guard by an unexpected development. Bosco was wearing a rather obvious fake mustache, a monocle, and a bowler hat. "What ho!" he greeted with an incredibly fake British accent. "Samuel, Maximillian, Bellatrix!"
"What the...?" Sam barked, stunned.
"You're probably wondering how I know your names!" Bosco proclaimed.
"Daddy," Trixie asked quietly, "why is Bosco in costume? It's not Halloween."
"He's certifiable, like me," Max explained. "There's really no explaining his actions."
"Psst!" Bosco whispered. "Guys, it's me! Bosco!"
"Trixie never would have guessed," the unamused filly said with heavy sarcasm.
"I knew this was a great disguise!" Bosco whispered, apparently immune to sarcasm.
"So Bosco," Sam asked, "what's with the slanted soup strainer?"
"Bosco?" Bosco demanded. "I know not this moniker. I am Lord Reginald Rumplebottom, Earl of Dukedom, the Third."
Trixie blinked. She wasn't sure which was more absurd: Bosco's chosen alias, or that he thought anyone would believe his ridiculous cover story. Either way, she still wanted candy. "Mister British Bosco?" she asked sweetly. "Can Trixie have some candy?"
"Of a certainty, my good young mare!" Bosco proclaimed, handing her a Cadbury Egg.
Trixie smiled as she enjoyed eating the tasty candy, ignoring the conversation around her as she devoured the delicious treat. She managed to finish just as Sam asked about buying something.
"Well, I still have one can of shaving cream the blooming skinbodies haven't gotten yet," Bosco mentioned.
"Oh, yeah, I love shaving!" Max proclaimed.
"That's funny," Sam spoke up. "I've never seen you shave."
"I have," Trixie speaks up. "I hold the kitties for him, but they always make such funny noises."
"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that," Sam said carefully.
"Hear what?" Max asked.
"And..." Bosco tantalized, "I have a most peculiar device behind the counter..."
"What is it?" Trixie asked eagerly.
"It's the latest in Bosco-tech innovation. A delightful invention I like to call a chemically based voice modulator."
"Trixie will take it!"
"That will be thirty shillings," Bosco proclaims.
Reaching into her hat, Trixie pulled out thirty shillings. "Here you go!"
Bosco looked at the shillings for a time, rather nonplussed. "I'm afraid I've made a rather dreadful mistake," he admitted gamely. "Due to local regulations, I can't actually accept payment in shillings. I'll need it in American dollars."
"Okay..." Trixie said, pushing the shillings back into her hat. "How much in dollars?"
"$1,000,000!" Bosco proclaimed.
"A million bucks!" Max proclaimed in shock. "No way are we giving out that many tickets-"
"Here you go," Trixie said easily, dropping a million dollars in twenties on the counter from out of her hat.
Sam and Max stared in shock as Bosco took the still banded bills, counting them easily. "Excellent! Here you go!" He then handed over a balloon filled with helium attached to an inhaler.
Trixie picked it up, staring at it. "What...does it do?"
"It uses chemical based alteration to change the modulation of your voice molecules to increase the pitch," Bosco explained.
Trixie stared at it for a time. "Well, Trixie's voice is perfect as is. You can have this, Uncle Sam!" She threw the voice modulator to Sam, who deftly caught it and stored it away. "Could British Bosco throw in the last bottle of shaving cream, too? Trixie wants it for pranks."
"Hmm...hardly proper to renegotiate after the purchase..." Bosco began.
Trixie quickly gave him her cute, begging pout.
"Oh dash it all!" Bosco grunted. "Bring it up to the counter and I'll ring it up!"
At that exact moment, a rat with everything below the neck shaved bare leapt onto the little table the shaving cream was set on. "Paws off, pigs!" he proclaimed, reaching for it. "The skinbodies rule the streets!"
Before he could grab the bottle, Trixie seized it in her magic and proceeded to brain him and his partner in the tiny car who was holding a handgun like a cannon. She then handed the bottle to Bosco to scan while sticking the gun in her hat. She then added the shaving cream to her growing hat store before heading out with Sam and Max.
One of the skinbodies groaned. "Ugh...that unicorn's telekinesis is OP..."
"...please nerf..." the other groaned out.
On how Trixie acquired $1,000,000, I bet she stood in the lobby of a bank and put on the most irresistible puppy eyes she could muster. Still, just a bet
5668156
Nope. Still the same money she got from begging on White Collar Drive back in chapter two, as explained in chapter three.
5668165 Oh yeah... almost forgot about that. Still a possibility, though.
5668301
And again, I haven't played these games, which is why I didn't get the joke at first.
...
IT'S STILL CUTE!
Two things we know from this chapter:
1. Max actually shaves
2. Trixie is still playing 'Gooder', as it's called
5668156 As I recall, Dr Adorable (aka Fluttershy, from "Dr Adorable's Sing-Along Blog") used that tactic when robbing banks.
Trixie is still being awesome and adorable (I propose the word "Awesomdorable", or "Adorabadass"), as she should be. Good work.
>"Samuel, Maximillian, Trixie!"
>Trixie
It's Bellatrix.
5668956
Thank you! I couldn't think up a good way to Britishize Trixie.
well trixie finally got her own gun max must be so proud
Yet another chapter written to perfect Sam & Max pitch.
Self-aware fiction is amusing. Have you ever written a character saying "who writes this dreck?!"I did once. I didn't think it was that funny, so I had the character promptly beaned. Moral of the story is: never tick off your author.
Looking at the 'Also Liked' bar, it looks like 'raises filly-version' could be made into an official category here.
2 things
1. i can not tell if trixies hat is enchanted or bigger on the inside (timelord technology)
2. how did she get all that money in like an hour.
Were did she get a million bucks? And the British money? Did she expend all month with her beggars act?
5722912
She got tons of money by begging from white collar criminals who had tons of ill gotten gains and no defense against cuteness. Her hat has a spell on it that is a combination of a 'bag of holding' effect and a currency conversion spell. Since she doesn't understand money numbers - and the games don't seem to, either - the hat just converts whatever money is inside it at equivalent values to however much she wants to pull out of it in the most efficient manner possible.
5722920 That explains a lot then. I like the humor, but I've never played Sam and Max.
5668956
According to your headcanon.
5864818 NERF IT MORE THAN YASUO, META KNIGHT, AND G1 PSYCHIC TYPES COMBINED!
One cannot "nerf" The Great and Powerful Trixie.
Trixie is un-nerf-able.
6108470 Specifically, Brawl MK
Um... Tats.. getting you hands on still banded money is..... next to imposible-ish, kinda... How did Trixie Do this!?
7303842
Magic hat.
6862432
It only took a dozen patches for the devs to realize any methods they used to nerf her would only make her stronger in other, unexpected ways.
They wisely decided not to persist.
7304238 do not question the magic hat, just like you don't question pinkie pie. OMG IT'S PINKIES HAT 0-0
7646419
And then Bosco learned that one CAN kill Lord British...
5668156
I would not be surprised at all at this point.
And,
that's just hilarious. Poor kittens. Muahahahaha!