Well, it has known what Twilight seems to think: and it's not good....for Rarity at least. But on the other hand, Rarity has the right to date and flirt any man that she wants. I hate to say it, but Spike....you should had just cut bait and look for someone else. There had to be that point where it isn't worth it anymore.
But to just give up all together, that's just silly. Never give up on love, Spike. Sure it's painful, and cause one a lot of pain, but when you finally find that one special creature that completes you, it truly is the greatest gift to one can ever receive. At that point, a little pain and heartache is nothing compared to true love and acceptance and belonging.
I wonder how the others will react to this. It's more than likely going to be a mix, but the interesting thing is what is gonna be said, and more importantly, by whom. I have a feeling that it's gonna be a pleasant surprise....and for some of the mares it's completely unexpected.
Well, you're off to a pretty good start. It'll be interesting to see Rarity crying to Spike about another failed date with Spike being completely neutral about it.
Well, it has known what Twilight seems to think: and it's not good....for Rarity at least. But on the other hand, Rarity has the right to date and flirt any man that she wants. I hate to say it, but Spike....you should had just cut bait and look for someone else. There had to be that point where it isn't worth it anymore.
I concur!
The way it happened was pretty hurtful (I suspect she didn't hear what he said because he kept botching it, not because she's that cruel), but it's clear it's not going to happen. If after seven years she still doesn't see him as potential coltfriend, then he's just not her type.
Le's have a little chuckiln here:: Since Rarity has obviously rejected Spike without actually saying that---How long will it take for somepony--if not more than one---will realize that she's has feelings for Spike for the longest time, and more intriging, how much it will take til Spike realizes it?
No offense, but seriously, Spike is as oblivious as other clueless ponies. Though in hindsight, having a candle for a single mare will make one blind to what he has.
4368533 I am with you there. I want to see how she reacts when Spike isn't sticking up under her like he has for 7 years. She wont know what to do or think without him there with her. She might even feel like a part of her is missing. When she come crying to him I want him just to be steel face and be like I am done. I don't want to hear about your relationships anymore. Go to another friend or one of those other guys with this. I am going to live my own life.
4368548 Yea but think about how Rar will react when she sees him trying to live his own life. She seems like the type of person to want what she can't have. And the one person that was once always there under her now blowing her off. He can still be her friend but all that attention he was giving her has to end and I mean a hard end.
4368670 I am happy he will notice quick that there are even more mares out there for him.And once news gets out that he isn't hung up on Rar anymore all kinds of mares are going to come running out to hook up with the hot piece of dragon. I do hope this doesn't wrap his perspective on love but just make him alittle more careful who he spends 7 years chasing. I dont want to see him become a ass or not trusting of any mare thinking they are going to use him like she who will not be named... Rarity. But just feel that he has to guard his heart till he finds someone worth giving it to again.
4368670 Good to know that Spike will learn pretty quick that there are a lot of fish in the sea. It's just the question of who will make the first move.
Okay. So, Rarity brushed Spike off. Twilight is Spike's unofficial big sister. Twilight is going to let Rarity have it. Spike may have given up on love (which I can't blame him), but let's see if love has given up on him. It will be interesting to see who (or how many) will try to fill the current void in his heart.
you miss spelled a couple words here and there, for one alien in the beginning to describe spike, just a couple jumbled letters happens to everybody and accomplishing should be accomplish, those are only thigns I can find wrong with this, but other wise I am so far hooked....though I must agree with TheArchive, Rarity is just a TEENY bit out of character here.
So, here's the thing: A good Spike-Harem fic is like crack to me. I'm a huge fan of Mr Unsmiley's Spike-centric ouvre, I've commissioned work that plays along those lines, hell, I've even written Spike as a nigh-irresistable draconic sex lord myself on one or two occasions. But I hate 95% of all Spike Harem stuff I see. In the first few paragraphs, this fic is already tumbling into the forlorn 95%.
Remember that Spike is a child in canon. He is literally prepubescent--he's not even a juvenile dragon. He has a huge crush on Rarity, and Rarity clearly adores him as a child. Rarity is not romantically interested in a child for obvious reasons which we should all be grateful for. She never flirts, grooms, or acts untowardly to him. The closest she'll go is saying that she'd find certain actions or behaviours attractive, and she doesn't lie about this, she would find these behaviours attractive, coming from a possible romantic partner. A prepubescent child is not a possible romantic partner for Rarity. Yes, Rarity has been a tease at times, she's been self-obsessed at times--she's not perfect, that's part of what makes her a compelling partner--but she would never intentionally break Spike's heart. When she and Spike thought they were going to die, she spent their last moments in a gesture of teary-eyed affection.
I have no issue with Sparity. Most good Sparity sets the relationship in the future, when Spike has grown and matured. This is fine! People change, and people's perception of other people can change with them. I can completely accept that as they both grow, Rarity would no longer see Spike as a quasi-sibling, and instead see him as an adult--and possible romantic partner--in his own right. Conversely, the opposite could also be true! Perhaps Rarity has grown up with Spike--a child roughly the same age and development as her little sister--so long that she cannot see him as something other than a sibling. Perhaps Spike, for all his charms, is just not her type. Maybe she has a thing for older stallions, or lush manes. Maybe she has a hoof or a horn fetish, and simply can't be sexually happy in a relationship that can't include those two things! Rarity is her own pony, all of these things are okay!
In this first chapter we have a grown Spike who is still obsessed with Rarity. He has not picked up on the fact that Rarity knows of his attraction to her--she might not remember every moment, but she damn well knows about his crush--which is pretty oblivious on his part. He has not seen--or worse, simply chosen to ignore--signs of disinterest (protip: if a lady walks off in the middle of your romantic confession to go flirt with someone else, it means you made your intentions known long ago, you've not taken subtle hints, and she's a step away from pouring her martini in your lap and giving you the finger) which paints him as either dumb or stalkerish. When faced with rejection there is no despair or introspection or even mild worries that somehow his own failures caused this to happen, which is not in itself, mmhm, toxic, but the way he channels anger straight into his supposed 'love' by blaming her for everything is toxic indeed. For someone he supposedly loves, it doesn't take long for him to make her the object of his frothing, emo rage. Then, there's the barely-subtextual implication that Rarity owes him a relationship because he's persisted for so long--her own preferences don't matter, gosh-darn it, he's put in the effort of holding an obsession for all these years, so he's damn well entitled to a bout of romantic affection from her.
In short, this Spike you've written is kinda a dick.
A good harem-protagonist Spike is appealing because he's grown out of the endearing-yet-vaguely-daft kid he was in the show into a man who is truly the product of his upbringing. He is Spike who has grown up around wonderful people and learnt their wonderfulness. He has developed Rarity's sense of taste and culture, Twilight's intelligence and determination, Fluttershy's unconditional kindness and goodness, Rainbow Dash's sense of daring, Pinkie Pie's humor and love of fun, Applejack's work-ethic and straightforwardness, and Shiny's mixture of laid-back attitude and can-do drive. This Spike is both athletic and well-read, brave but not reckless, is good-natured and has self-esteem, but is not arrogant. It is easy to see why mare after mare (and probably a few stallions as well) would fall for a drake like that. Because at the heart of it, a grown Spike should be likeable.
And if Spike sees himself as owed a chance from Rarity, he isn't likeable.
And if he's not likeable, he's not a very good harem protagonist.
I saw I had missed a lot of updates, so I decided to start from the beginning. I have to admit I'm a bit sad that nothing has changed in this chapter. The criticism I brought up in my comment from so long ago is still present, that being how out-of-character Rarity is. Normally this wouldn't be that much of an issue if it's just a single, inconsequential instance (it can be hard to avoid moments of OOC for a character), and while this is the only instance I've seen (besides a few issues with spelling and grammar, mostly grammar), the problem is that it is big in scale, if not in number. In other words, while it is just one instance of a character being OOC, that one instance is pretty much the only thing supporting the premise. It does not feel like I read about Rarity accepting or rejecting Spike in an in-character, gentle way which could still allow the premise to work. Instead, I felt like Rarity was replaced with a one-dimensional jerk just long enough to hurt Spike and force the story along.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with this comment. You've expressed everything I could have ever wanted to say about this set up far better than I ever could have. You deserve a goddamn round of applause.
Depends. I wouldn't say massively. I mean, in the show she normally didn't exactly show interest in him and ignored his approaches after all. So, her taking it even farther as to ignore his confession is a possibility, no matter how unlikely it seems.
4368670 I know it's a bit late, but did you know there was an official way to measure an equines height? it's called hands. if needed, you could still do the hooves measurement, but change it to base 4, not base 6. so 5'10" would be 17.2 hooves/hands
Sir this is the first fic I believe where spike just gave up on rarity and it remarkably well I give you x 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000
dammmmmm THIS IS THE BEST FIRST FIC I HAVE EVER SEEN
....Poor Spike....
Well, it has known what Twilight seems to think: and it's not good....for Rarity at least. But on the other hand, Rarity has the right to date and flirt any man that she wants. I hate to say it, but Spike....you should had just cut bait and look for someone else. There had to be that point where it isn't worth it anymore.
But to just give up all together, that's just silly. Never give up on love, Spike. Sure it's painful, and cause one a lot of pain, but when you finally find that one special creature that completes you, it truly is the greatest gift to one can ever receive. At that point, a little pain and heartache is nothing compared to true love and acceptance and belonging.
I wonder how the others will react to this. It's more than likely going to be a mix, but the interesting thing is what is gonna be said, and more importantly, by whom. I have a feeling that it's gonna be a pleasant surprise....and for some of the mares it's completely unexpected.
I wish to see more
Well, you're off to a pretty good start. It'll be interesting to see Rarity crying to Spike about another failed date with Spike being completely neutral about it.
4368503
I concur!
The way it happened was pretty hurtful (I suspect she didn't hear what he said because he kept botching it, not because she's that cruel), but it's clear it's not going to happen. If after seven years she still doesn't see him as potential coltfriend, then he's just not her type.
Good game, pack it in, move on.
If I were Rarity I would sleep with one eye open.
Le's have a little chuckiln here:: Since Rarity has obviously rejected Spike without actually saying that---How long will it take for somepony--if not more than one---will realize that she's has feelings for Spike for the longest time, and more intriging, how much it will take til Spike realizes it?
No offense, but seriously, Spike is as oblivious as other clueless ponies. Though in hindsight, having a candle for a single mare will make one blind to what he has.
4368548 Don't worry, he'll learn fast that she's not the only mare in town.
4368503 Yeah, as it said, he was nervous.And in a way it can be chalked up to her simply getting distracted by a pretty face. But no less a gut punch.
4368533 I am with you there. I want to see how she reacts when Spike isn't sticking up under her like he has for 7 years. She wont know what to do or think without him there with her. She might even feel like a part of her is missing. When she come crying to him I want him just to be steel face and be like I am done. I don't want to hear about your relationships anymore. Go to another friend or one of those other guys with this. I am going to live my own life.
4368548 Yea but think about how Rar will react when she sees him trying to live his own life. She seems like the type of person to want what she can't have. And the one person that was once always there under her now blowing her off. He can still be her friend but all that attention he was giving her has to end and I mean a hard end.
4368670 I am happy he will notice quick that there are even more mares out there for him.And once news gets out that he isn't hung up on Rar anymore all kinds of mares are going to come running out to hook up with the hot piece of dragon.
I do hope this doesn't wrap his perspective on love but just make him alittle more careful who he spends 7 years chasing. I dont want to see him become a ass or not trusting of any mare thinking they are going to use him like she who will not be named... Rarity. But just feel that he has to guard his heart till he finds someone worth giving it to again.
4368670 Good to know that Spike will learn pretty quick that there are a lot of fish in the sea. It's just the question of who will make the first move.
Okay. So, Rarity brushed Spike off. Twilight is Spike's unofficial big sister. Twilight is going to let Rarity have it. Spike may have given up on love (which I can't blame him), but let's see if love has given up on him.
It will be interesting to see who (or how many) will try to fill the current void in his heart.
I love this already.
please continue
4368533
This looks good. Just try to lightning up on the "bro", "sis" thing. Coming off too OC to believe.
Now, on to the next chapter!
Wow, Rarity was massively OOC here.
you miss spelled a couple words here and there, for one alien in the beginning to describe spike, just a couple jumbled letters happens to everybody and accomplishing should be accomplish, those are only thigns I can find wrong with this, but other wise I am so far hooked....though I must agree with TheArchive, Rarity is just a TEENY bit out of character here.
4619410 Things. You said thigns, it's things.
Element of Generosity my ass!!!!! Rarity you BITCH!!!!
always been my least favorite of the mane 6....
To you dear author, have earned the attention of the God of Madness. I shall continue to see where you shall lead me down on this road.
I approve. With the way Rarity treats Spike in canon at times, I could see her becoming that desensitized to him after some more years.
Rarity, oh rarity...never before have I wanted to punch you in the face so you get it through your head you messed up
Ehhhhh...
So, here's the thing: A good Spike-Harem fic is like crack to me. I'm a huge fan of Mr Unsmiley's Spike-centric ouvre, I've commissioned work that plays along those lines, hell, I've even written Spike as a nigh-irresistable draconic sex lord myself on one or two occasions. But I hate 95% of all Spike Harem stuff I see. In the first few paragraphs, this fic is already tumbling into the forlorn 95%.
Remember that Spike is a child in canon. He is literally prepubescent--he's not even a juvenile dragon. He has a huge crush on Rarity, and Rarity clearly adores him as a child. Rarity is not romantically interested in a child for obvious reasons which we should all be grateful for. She never flirts, grooms, or acts untowardly to him. The closest she'll go is saying that she'd find certain actions or behaviours attractive, and she doesn't lie about this, she would find these behaviours attractive, coming from a possible romantic partner. A prepubescent child is not a possible romantic partner for Rarity. Yes, Rarity has been a tease at times, she's been self-obsessed at times--she's not perfect, that's part of what makes her a compelling partner--but she would never intentionally break Spike's heart. When she and Spike thought they were going to die, she spent their last moments in a gesture of teary-eyed affection.
I have no issue with Sparity. Most good Sparity sets the relationship in the future, when Spike has grown and matured. This is fine! People change, and people's perception of other people can change with them. I can completely accept that as they both grow, Rarity would no longer see Spike as a quasi-sibling, and instead see him as an adult--and possible romantic partner--in his own right. Conversely, the opposite could also be true! Perhaps Rarity has grown up with Spike--a child roughly the same age and development as her little sister--so long that she cannot see him as something other than a sibling. Perhaps Spike, for all his charms, is just not her type. Maybe she has a thing for older stallions, or lush manes. Maybe she has a hoof or a horn fetish, and simply can't be sexually happy in a relationship that can't include those two things! Rarity is her own pony, all of these things are okay!
In this first chapter we have a grown Spike who is still obsessed with Rarity. He has not picked up on the fact that Rarity knows of his attraction to her--she might not remember every moment, but she damn well knows about his crush--which is pretty oblivious on his part. He has not seen--or worse, simply chosen to ignore--signs of disinterest (protip: if a lady walks off in the middle of your romantic confession to go flirt with someone else, it means you made your intentions known long ago, you've not taken subtle hints, and she's a step away from pouring her martini in your lap and giving you the finger) which paints him as either dumb or stalkerish. When faced with rejection there is no despair or introspection or even mild worries that somehow his own failures caused this to happen, which is not in itself, mmhm, toxic, but the way he channels anger straight into his supposed 'love' by blaming her for everything is toxic indeed. For someone he supposedly loves, it doesn't take long for him to make her the object of his frothing, emo rage. Then, there's the barely-subtextual implication that Rarity owes him a relationship because he's persisted for so long--her own preferences don't matter, gosh-darn it, he's put in the effort of holding an obsession for all these years, so he's damn well entitled to a bout of romantic affection from her.
In short, this Spike you've written is kinda a dick.
A good harem-protagonist Spike is appealing because he's grown out of the endearing-yet-vaguely-daft kid he was in the show into a man who is truly the product of his upbringing. He is Spike who has grown up around wonderful people and learnt their wonderfulness. He has developed Rarity's sense of taste and culture, Twilight's intelligence and determination, Fluttershy's unconditional kindness and goodness, Rainbow Dash's sense of daring, Pinkie Pie's humor and love of fun, Applejack's work-ethic and straightforwardness, and Shiny's mixture of laid-back attitude and can-do drive. This Spike is both athletic and well-read, brave but not reckless, is good-natured and has self-esteem, but is not arrogant. It is easy to see why mare after mare (and probably a few stallions as well) would fall for a drake like that. Because at the heart of it, a grown Spike should be likeable.
And if Spike sees himself as owed a chance from Rarity, he isn't likeable.
And if he's not likeable, he's not a very good harem protagonist.
More like: "You have no idea what kind of damage you've just done."
Huh. A couple paragraphs in and I'm already comparing Spike to Ichigo Kurosaki. That's an accomplishment in my book.
5893675 Whoa... you expressed your opinion... and didn't get flak for it... That's pretty impressive!
My only requirements for a Fic are correct grammar and non-bullshit reasoning
I saw I had missed a lot of updates, so I decided to start from the beginning. I have to admit I'm a bit sad that nothing has changed in this chapter. The criticism I brought up in my comment from so long ago is still present, that being how out-of-character Rarity is. Normally this wouldn't be that much of an issue if it's just a single, inconsequential instance (it can be hard to avoid moments of OOC for a character), and while this is the only instance I've seen (besides a few issues with spelling and grammar, mostly grammar), the problem is that it is big in scale, if not in number. In other words, while it is just one instance of a character being OOC, that one instance is pretty much the only thing supporting the premise. It does not feel like I read about Rarity accepting or rejecting Spike in an in-character, gentle way which could still allow the premise to work. Instead, I felt like Rarity was replaced with a one-dimensional jerk just long enough to hurt Spike and force the story along.
5893675
There is absolutely nothing wrong with this comment. You've expressed everything I could have ever wanted to say about this set up far better than I ever could have. You deserve a goddamn round of applause.
7031287 this only is because the majority of the fanbase shares this opinion.
4503850
Depends. I wouldn't say massively. I mean, in the show she normally didn't exactly show interest in him and ignored his approaches after all. So, her taking it even farther as to ignore his confession is a possibility, no matter how unlikely it seems.
Rarity, you glorified dress sewing bastard!
How could you be so blind, and so thick headed.
Spike, you deserve better than that ignorant tramp.
4368670
I know it's a bit late, but did you know there was an official way to measure an equines height? it's called hands. if needed, you could still do the hooves measurement, but change it to base 4, not base 6. so 5'10" would be 17.2 hooves/hands
Sir this is the first fic I believe where spike just gave up on rarity and it remarkably well I give you
x 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000