The Seasons of Equestria

by Lucaro

Epilogue: Waking Up

Snowhoof lay cold on the floor, clinging to his last shred of life. Luna urged her to consummate the marriage and end the winter. They were taken to the bedroom, and an hour later, the storm had finally cleared. They all filed intoto the bedroom and saw them in bed together. There was blood everywhere, and Snowhoof’s breaths were raggedy, but he was smiling. Luna kissed her son’s fevered brow. “Safe travels, my dear. Know that everyone here loves you and will waiting for you when you return next winter.”

Snowhoof took his last breath, and the rise and fall of his chest ceased. They all looked at each other. Lilyheart began to cry, hugging Snowhoof’s corpse. “Oh, how could I have ever doubted you? My sweet stallion.”

They all looked down, and Luna and Lilyheart requested that they be alone with him so they could prepare his body for burial.

***

A few days later, Luna and Celestia walked ahead of them on the steel walkway of Frostcrown, talking animatedly. Cadence and Shining Armor were kissing, and the soldiers were cheering, and the dragons roaring in triumph. The ponies in the chambers below had been thawed and were walking alongside them. Starlight rolled his eyes. “How are we supposed to get all these people out of here?”

Vaelan rumbled with laughter. “Don’t worry, we’ve got lots of time. Spring is here, and I’m going to find me a lovely dragoness the moment I get back home.”

Starlight grinned, thinking of his own lover. He and Amberleaf would be reunited next fall, Luna had promised him that.

Starlight looked behind him and saw Callista carrying the wounded Maelstrom. King Lightheart was with his own gryphons, also being showered with praise. They were all being hailed as heroes, for slaying the evil Snowhoof. They all smiled at each other, knowing the truth.

The storm had ceased, and the sun was brightly shining. Starlight looked up at the sky, smiling. Things were going to get better from here on.

No one would ever forget their deeds on the fabled Battle of Frostcrown, nor the bonds forged that day. We will be remembered, and even though we might fade, the friendships made here today will last forever.

THE END

Comments

[The Fluffy Ninja]

4296423
I was looking at your story and noticed that it was complete. This story looks very interesting, but I also see that it doesn't have a lot of views. Have you considered posting your story in some other groups? It could really help give it some more attention.

[Lucaro]

4688717

Thanks! I think it turned out really well for my first MLP fanfic

[Lucaro]

4690247

Those are his thoughts. He gives a little speech introducing himself, and I switch into third person. It will remain third person for the rest of the story.

[NobleValor]

Okay I have read this thing up to Chapter 15 and I feel I can give it a fair critique. Lucaro your story needs only one thing: proper build up for the drama. Case in point: when Brightmane surrendered himself to Cadence in Chapter 11, you showed it happening in the next chapter. What would have been better, in my opinion, is hearing the story told as though it were real-time. Also, you could spare some time to go more into detail on some places and the inner thoughts of ponies on certain matters. Otherwise your story telling style is fine.
Now for a personal moment (you have managed to move me emotionally and that is no small feat! If I could I'd shake your hand or brohoof or something! *Ahem* Moving along.) While reading this story, when I reached the chapter named 'Rage Against Winter' I could not help but feel a small amount of righteous indignation on behalf of Snowhoof! How do I justify this? Well, consider that Snowhoof has not only spent the last 1000 years imprisoned for a deed which he did not do, he also got tortured for it! Not to mention, that Celestia had blamed him for corrupting Luna, which is probably why she had him tortured in the first place! Then upon his release (after an attack mind you, which was meant to kill or imprison him!), he found out that the ponies that were the closest he had to loved ones had betrayed him to a life of loneliness and pain! And, in the chapter in question, the races called for his torture, which is what caused this in the first place! I mean had any one of them even considered, even for a moment, how he must be feeling! Did any of them have the common decency to feel any sympathy for the one pony in the world who needed it the most! I mean in the course of a single day, his entire world changed due to the actions of one pony who failed to keep her emotions in check! I mean if it weren't for all the pain he were causing, I'd be rooting for this guy!

And to top it off! the mare that he willingly went through all this for, didn't love him back. He got tortured everyday for one. Thousand. Years! And she didn't have the decency to see him upon his release, even to say that she didn't feel about him that he felt about her! Exactly what the hell was she doing that was so damned important that DAY! Lastly, for being the one to start all this in the first place, I hope that Brightmane bastard dies an agonizing death!

Also, why can't Luna or Celestia control their respective alicorns, like when when Celestia found out that Brightmane was in charge of the attack on Avendale, why didn't she shut him down?!
Don't mean it to sound like a rant, but I had to get that off my chest. Really love the story will finish it today.
P.S. Sorry it took so long to get back here. I got caught up in a contest-which I didn't win- but I just finished reading the other entries. (For the record, the winner they selected, totally deserved it.

[NobleValor]

Might want to work on the ending too. (Build it up a bit more. Also suggest watching Code: Geass for reference material)

[Wiltrose]

Great story, you had me in tears at the end. The build up towards the ending does need a little work but otherwise great all around. May I ask for a small sequel to wrap up Snowhoof's return?