Hehe..... Boobies.....

I liked it! Good luck in writing more!

Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?

Caught in a land slide no escape from reality

NEED MOAR!
Also, the reason this was featured, was because the premise is good a and you have a good writing style

Cute update. Still too fast paced, especially with how fast she seems to be getting along with him. But, other than that, still well done.

3633975

Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?

Caught in a landslide, no escape from reality,

Open your eyes, Look up to the skies and see,

3634078 A different side of me, because I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell.

3634078

Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?

Caught in a landslide, no escape from reality,

Open your eyes, Look up to the skies and see,

I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy

3634097 NOOOOO!!!!
You killed it!! We had a song going...

3634105 Now its copyright infringement.

(I'm such a bitch)

3634107 Well, I got ninety-nine problems and a bitch ain't one. Still, you suck, and may Freddie Mercury rest in peace.

3634098

Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?

Caught in a landslide, no escape from reality,

Open your eyes, Look up to the skies and see,

I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy

Because I'm easy come, easy go,

3634129

Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?

Caught in a landslide, no escape from reality,

Open your eyes, Look up to the skies and see,

I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy

Because I'm easy come, easy go,

Little high, little low

'The nicest, most beautiful woman in the world is using your bathtub, Phil. It's not a punishment, but it's sure as hell not a reward.

Bullshit. That's a reward.

For now, I'm placing my bets on this story taking place while Celestia was missing in the first two episodes of season four. Though if that is the case, I wonder where Luna is.

3634199 Any way the wind blows, doesn't really matter to me...

A little rough in places but it's still enjoyable. Might want to work on things like the following, though:

I don't think she'll ever get used to cars.

She went to take a bath.

That doesn't look near so much like a time-skip as it looks like a paragraph was accidentally deleted between the two. It's advisable to place breaks between scene changes and start new scenes with a brief, descriptive paragraph to keep people up to speed with the story. Sudden shifts like that are prone to confusing people and breaking the flow of the story. Other than that I really can't complain about any of it, though. Your grammar and punctuation are fine, the dialogue doesn't feel stilted and the idea is thus being pursued quite well. You've clearly got something good on your hands. Just needs a bit of polishing.

I like it so far. Its pretty good for a draft. can't wait for more

just bang Celestia already

I really hope that she finds out about the bronies and my little pony. i wonder what her reaction would be...

You update quickly.

I demand moar!

MORE

Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?
Caught in a landslide, no escape from reality,
Open your eyes, Look up to the skies and see,
I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy
Because I'm easy come, easy go,
Little high, little low

Any way the wind blows, doesn't really matter to meeeeeeeeeeeeee...

Alright, lets cut to the chase. Are you a spy? I asked, are you a motherfucking spy?!

Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?

I started singing that as soon as I woke up.

Oh, by the way the three comments under me.
A giant more.
Moar.
And then there is that one guy who said you update quickly. For some reason I find that funny.

Hehe... Boobies...

Very interesting so far, I am excited to see where you take us dear author.

I wonder the story is going to end up like Bohemian Rhapsody....hmm static2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20111104212722/callofduty/images/9/97/KingWondering.jpg

I'm really liking this story so far, and in these early stages, it still has a lot of potential. Please don't waste this oppurtunity, and I think It would be cool if the story lasted a long time, telling of Celestia adapting to the Human world and way of life. Like the interent (safe parts of at anyway), christmas, science and so on. Keep up the good work!

5 out of 5 moustaches.

Yeah, sorry, this fic isn't necessarily bad by any means, I think I am just spoiled after being on the site for a really long time now and have seen some really good HiE's that this can't compare to, like trying to eat Hershe's after Lindt chocolate, still tasty, but never the same.

Good luck with your story but this is where I step out, cheers!

Boop.

3634852 LOL

But in all seriousness its good looking foreword to a update.

Love the concept, but really could use some editing. Keep on at it!

Hey! It's the same story! Cool!

Image: http://i0.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/000/574/moar-cat.jpg

MOAR. NOW! pls. :,(.

Sorry if this seems harsh but I really can't fathom why this is able to get so many likes. This has all been done before and done better as well. I really don't think you could cram any more cliches and tropes into this story if you even tried. On top of the extremely over used premise the character interactions are extraordinarily unbelievable and extremely awkward. There is some massive issues when it comes to the editing, perspective, and pacing too. I can't see any way of fixing these issues without starting over. I was optimistic that the second chapter would be better but the issues persisted and in some cases got worse.

I don't mind stories like this. Really, I don't. But I just can't bring my self to like this story.

Not to be a jerk but, and that already makes me sound like a jerk, ponies/horses can digest meat and it will not cause them any harm at all, some even really like it and 'prefer' it to other food. Something horses/ponies can't digest is alcohol so rumors of Berry Punch being a drunk in some fanfictions are vastly exaggerated. Of course this is assuming that you want to use real life 'abilities' of horses/ponies on earth and did not decide that the Equestria horses/ponies would have certain differences that would cause them to be able to drink alcohol and not eat meat. Other than my mini-rant this is a great story so far and I am just Nitpicking with what I wrote above, can't wait for the next chapter.

Great job with this chapter keep it up

-Sly Moon-

3637314

Now I knew they could digest, but some actually prefer it?

i3.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/006/482/template.jpg

3635632
Maybe, they put in the opening line.

3634400 to meeeeee

3637936
Mama...

3638203 just killed a man

3637314
They also can't vomit. Or talk. Or fly. Or use magic.

Alright. To everybody who cares, I am going to update the chapters that I posted. As I said, this was a test of my own writing abilities. Going from what everybody said, my guess is that, from a professional standpoint, I have a C level story. I want nothing less than B+ by the time I upload my third chapter. I want the like/dislike ratio to go back to a constant 10:1, so I'm gonna work hard on it.

I hope that the people that didn't like it like the new version, and if you liked it before, then there's nothing really to say but thanks.

Thank you all for reading and commenting.

Put a gun against his head,

3639007 pulled the trigger now he's dead...

3638937

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

OH GOD I CAN ALREADY SEE WHAT THIS IS HEADED

but I ruined to much stories cause my predictions are always right and you humans have a one track mind for Fics like theses so imma stay quiet and watch.

3639237
Why bother guessing when you can simply go utterly mad, peer into the void which spans realities, and see all that will ever be, has been, and is?
...oh right, that makes most people's brains implode.

3639505

No I seen it all

The rabbit hole is really deep.