Star Dreamer and Twilight Sparkle never used to be kind of ponies to have friends, but they've always had each other. As adults, they find that their friendship is the most important thing to happen to either of them.
Chapters (3)
- Member Since 26th Feb, 2012
- offline last seen Nov 29th, 2012
explodingdagger
Twilight is the best pony.
explodingdagger
Joined 26th Feb, 2012 ·
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I swear, if this OC is a mary sue/ gary stu, desks will be flipped. I will be back once I've read this.
Edit: Hmm, I'm not sensing a Gary Stu-ness from this OC so far. You have intrigued me to read this further. Please proceed.
“I know that book like the back of my hand!"
.....you made a common mistake my friend
if you cant find it, here
“I know that book like the back of my hand!
“I know that book like the back of my Hoof"
is what i believe what it should be
I like it so far, keep it up sir
Interesting... tracked so I don't lose it.
I see potential here...
*tracked*
*sees that the chapter has ended* FFFUUUUU- RIGHT MOAR!
........If..thats alright with you, that is.....
It's too early to know if this will be good, but I remain cautiously optimistic.
290351 same here *plus track*
289224
How did I miss that? Thanks for pointing it out.
291699
s'ok
need another helper? i am GREAT with spelling and errors
i shall track this
do not let me down
lol
291751 I can tell you are amazing with grammar, considering how you left out capital letters and a full stop.
Let's fix your sentence shall we?
Original: "need another helper? i am GREAT with spelling and errors"
Fixed version: "Need another helper? I am GREAT with spelling and errors."
Let's review:
Capital letters, use for; the beginning of sentences, for the word I, for all proper nouns, in acronyms, the start of speech, days of the week, and titles.
Full stop; use at the end of sentences.
AMAZING.
Good story, will track.
335637
yeah yeah fuck you two buddy, no need for another damn grammar douche
335725 You don't seem to have learned anything from my previous post, and still have quite few errors, let's fix it up shall we.
Your original sentence: yeah yeah fuck you two buddy, no need for another damn grammar douche
Fixed version: Yeah, yeah fuck you too buddy, no need for another damn grammar douche.
Let's review:
Capital letters, use for; the beginning of sentences, for the word I, for all proper nouns, in acronyms, the start of speech, days of the week, and titles.
Full stop; use at the end of sentences.
The difference between to, two, and too:
To as in "I need to go to the store."
Too as in " That's too much."
Two as in "Johnny had two apples."
Remember kids; always use grammar.
Did you know: More than ten people a year are killed by vending machines.
4.bp.blogspot.com/-vXHjGecJ9Nk/Tza-SimS1_I/AAAAAAAAAtU/mjlZZiXYFiY/s1600/TheMoreYouKnow.jpg
340525
i really dont care
wow. you did really good and well i cannot say anything else so have some emoticons
Good pacing so far in this story, it's okay sometimes life does get to us. Be happy that you're motivated still to write and update this story. Looking forward for chapter 3.
Oh man, that hits me right in the heart. It's tough, seeing your parent(s) come home like that.
Hey, good things are well worth the wait.
Yay, I was so happy when I saw this was updated! Though nothing earth-shattering happened in this chapter it was kind of perfect. I really enjoy your character development, in this chapter especially.
My only pointers would be to chage "floor" to "ground" because they are outside. And "lied" to "lay" is more grammatically correct I believe.
477131 Thanks, it's been edited now.