As an M/M fanfic writer I am Currently working on Coffee Bender, about 2@ OC ponies Also i am working on a secret music Humans In Equestria Fanfic. i hope it turns out well.
Spirit Shine lives a mundane life in a small town. He has always struggled with being different from all the other ponies around him. He hides his true self away from others that would be quick judge him. This has stopped him from finding his special talent and having a happy life. But now he has discovered somepony that might be able to help him accept himself for who he truly is.
cover pic by Ironwolves21
http://ironwolves21.deviantart.com/
synopsis
by nerdrugger on funnyjunk
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At first, I was confused by "The moon." Then I realized it's a variation on "what the hay?" The Moon makes a good Hell analogue.
I can say this: The premise is a bit tough to bear (Battery for orientation is a touchy line to pull in the best of circumstances, and this may or may not grow into it) but I kind of like the characters. They seem interesting.
But critically: You need a SERIOUS editing pass. With that in place, it might be even more engaging.
I'll track this, because M/M stories are good.
"You are the gayest straight person I know."
But they're ponies...
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Ahhh, working out a bit of personal emotion. That's a good, cathartic experience.
And you're not going with the standard Buck=Fuck? I do that but others have their own preferences.
I look forward to more.
Well your mane and tail don't match in color, but that is the only criticism I have for you. I am very concerned for your OC. I hope things go better than RL generally allows.
Ouch @.@ And yet... hot tea and he's not going for first aid?
Don't ever feel that way, you have friends all around you. You just need to look to see them! OMC that is so awful. Thank god you have Frank in your corner. And, yeah, that must have burned, but the insult must have burned worse! And don't over stress the cutie mark, mine took me longer, and I even had to cheat to get one. I empathize with you, but I had it way easier. You just hit a bad pocket of ponies.
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too mortified to feel pain
I like this. Once more, really needs an editor's touch, but is at least engaging.
311310 honestly i dont know of anyone who would want to edit this for me, haha but hey. maybe next time. thanks for the comment
ill be up all night (0_0)
Yea, as time goes on they get more perceptive.
313159 hey if you know of anymore brony friends, please tell them about this, i dont care if they thumb or not, i just want more people to read it
This is one of the better ship-fics I've read: That is all
Nice story.static2.fjcdn.com/thumbnails/comments/You+_e8a161b846a528cccfdd5750e00dc1ab.png
329151 thank you
Unlike most stories I've read on this site, this one is genuinely fun to read, so me gusta! Not exactly the best in terms from a technical stand point, but who needs technical to have a good time? The only gripe I have is the way you utilize the music, but it's not enough to detract from the story. Good job sir
.
336905 thanks
Ill track this to see where it goes!
342089 i hope you wont be disappointed
It should probably be "Hey colt, don't sweat it." Vinyl seems a LITTLE too casual, when her usual personality is a little more madcap and irreverant, but in this context I can see her moderating herself. Looks good, just needs more contractions from Vinyl. She's very much a contraction user. Also, it's "It affects me too much." Affect is a verb, effect is a noun. Affect is a noun only in the context of describing a look on the face.
Good stuff. More gay ponies, yay
357516 thank you for pointing out the errors i fixed them i think
interesting start,
ATTA BE good story its an interesting change of pace........
it has to be said....BITCH
you have a lot of little errors like forgetting commas and stuff, but the writings pretty solid. Do you need a proofreader?
429193
i proofread my own stuff, at least this first one. also i might have a new chapter out by Tuesday night
429199 Oh, ok. Just asking :). And I'll definitely be reading the new chapter!
Hehehe. FancyMac. Quite a good choice among the many possible.
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thanks
rlv.zcache.com/funny_junk_mascot_poster-r08dc8702cf874edf9bf020c8e517eb55_wi4_400.jpg
596885 yea
Fancymac? Interesting choice.
765566 you said that last chapter, has it been that long...
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It rather has, actually. I had forgotten side-romances. I'm so much more into FancyFleur these days, and Macinpants (Or SmartyMac, to make the distinction clearer.)
767236 what did you think of the chapter though?
Aw shit, Big Mac got fucked up.
783708 what did you think of the chapter (quality wise)
783727
T'was pretty legitimate.
I sure as hell couldn't match it, I have the writing skills of a monkey high on acid.
783761 thanks
785077 Not a problem.
i loved charmingly rustic, this was quite well written aswell
This Comment's Purpose, Is To Bring The Author Back To Life, To Satisfy My Fic Craving...Pls....
2030813. Hey, I'm glad u like this story, Also sorry about not posting more ive been busywith school and work,and other stories but since someone liked enough to tell me to get back to work on ot, I will. Thank you spacetimebrony
2030813 sorry man, work and school have been really fucking me over wit shit to do,i plan on finishing a chapter tonight i mean i just have to copy it down
im a lazy shit
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